


A Court of Darkness and Song

by WriterCMaverick



Series: Crown of Song Chronicles [1]
Category: A Court of Thorns and Roses Series - Sarah J. Maas
Genre: ACOTAR - Freeform, ACoDaS, ACourtofDarknessandSong, Fanfiction, FirstDraft, Multi, sarahjmaas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-18
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-04-24 13:34:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 30
Words: 106,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14356542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WriterCMaverick/pseuds/WriterCMaverick
Summary: Sanarie was born and raised in The Court of Nightmares, she is a crippled, serf, under the mountain and the rule of the Steward, her father, Keir Darkbringer.Sanarie has spent her 500+ years of life just surviving the living hell, which is life in the Hewn City. This is until her father sets in motion events, which will lead to her liberation, and discovery of who she really is.The song of Night would heal them,The song of Truth would free them,The song of War would unite them,The song of Fate would renew them,The song of Death would save them.The Songs of the Wars, would, in the end, Crown them; Victorious.Name Pronounciations:Sanarie: S-ON-AH-REE -OR see this link (second option down): https://www.howtopronounce.com/sanari/Korazsa: KOOR-RA-JZSA (like Zsa Zsa Gabor) see this link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Y7ybLETntACover Image Information:Image: iStock (purchased)iStock Artist Profile: https://www.istockphoto.com/au/portfolio/alexandrapetruk?mediatype=photography&excludenudity=true&sort=bestBook Title Font (Same as ACOTAR Books): Crypton (Purchased)Author of Official Series Font: Trojan Color





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback welcome! This is a first draft and will become an original work in the second draft, but I can't make it better without your help; Constructive Criticism is really helpful for writer's, without your fresh eyes and perspective, there's a lot we can't see.
> 
> Looking forward to reading your suggestions ❤

Sanarie shuffled as quickly as she could to the throne room, it was a long way from the kitchens in the bowels of The Hewn City, to the throne room, a trip she tried to avoid at all costs, hunched over as she always was, disfigured from injuries she couldn't even remember attaining, she had never been able to walk upright, not from her memory, either too far back or blacked out in an effort to maintain mental and emotional equilibrium.  
A cold shiver went through her chest, at the words the messenger had said, she was to present her father with his favourite wine, a task he knew pained her and made her perform when he was low on subjects to torment or humiliate. The weight of the gilded decanter he demanded his wine be bought in was too much for her to manage, but she was forced into it, for his entertainment.  
The High Lord and Lady were not present, nor anyone who would advocate for any kindness on her behalf, High Lord Rhysand was formidable, there was a healthy fear of him, but it wasn't cruelty she feared from him, just his power and what he could do if he deigned to show them. When he and his court, his real court, were present, no cruelty would be shown to her, well at least nothing a kin to what she would experience today. She had sensed this from the miniscule amount of time, she'd been allowed in his presence over the 500+ years she'd been born, raised, and caged in the city; Lord Rhysand had a kind soul, then he had the mask he wore for his subjects of the Hewn City.  
It would be her father, steward of The Court of Nightmares she would be facing today and facing alone, Keir Darkbringer.  
As she drew near the last of the steps, the stairs of her ascent from the kitchens took their toll, heavy laden wine decanter or no, stairs were taxing on her back. As she stumbled on a stone step, an arm caught her elbow and righted her gently with a hand also on her lower back to support her.  
"It's me, I came as fast as I could, give me the jug, just until we get to the carved halls" whispered Korazsa’s voice in her ear.  
Sanarie was relieved it wasn't someone with ill intent, but wary nonetheless at the sound of her voice "you mustn't help me outside the kitchens, you know this, we'll both be punished if were caught"  
"I don't care, you'll break your back doing this" Korazsa said.  
Sanarie gave her a sideways look under her eyelashes which said 'you will care, when it comes to that'.  
Korazsa knew Sanarie was strong, but this torment she could take, what Keir would do if they were caught, would not be so tolerable, so reluctantly she let go.  
Sanarie breathed through the burning, cramping pain in her lower back, and soldiered through the last steps.  
Korazsa was still close to her, too close to be seen as just passing by, "back off, I must do this alone, you can help me later with some magic and one of your poultices for my back".  
She sighed wearily, and fell back.  
Sanarie turned to look back and said "return to the kitchens and stay there"  
Korazsa nodded and left, a tear escaping her eye.  
Life in The Court of Nightmares was an impossible existence, for those whom cruelty and treachery for your fellow fae, was not a natural state.  
Sanarie slowly made her way into the cavernous throne room, between the long tables, approaching her father's throne bent and hobbling, to the unaware they may have thought they were observing strict courtly respect, not the posture of a cripple.  
Unable to meet her fathers eye, she stared at the ground, feeling rather than seeing her fathers disdain for her.  
Keir tilted his head to observe her "Bow for your lord!' he laughed maniacally 'oh I'd almost forgot this is your natural state' the throne room around her rippled with laughter, as the Court of Nightmares laughed with their steward 'Crippled and useless, you couldn't have bought my wine any slower if you'd tried".  
His chief attendant approached his throne and whispered in his ear, cold dread expanded in her stomach as she glanced up and watched her father narrow his brows at her, turning his face savage, she looked down again and closed her eyes, and prayed to the mountain -the only thing she believed in- it wasn't what she feared.  
Keir flicked the index and middle finger on his left hand towards him, and the summoned subject was bought forward resisting the hands on their shoulders. Sanarie glanced to her left at the sound of the scuffle, as the subject was forced to the ground next to her, she knew as soon as she saw the beautiful twisted black locks and deep ebony skin, that they'd been seen on the stairs, as she caught Korazsa gaze, her closest friend, more akin to an elder sisters terrified, yet defiant royal blue eyes looked back at her. No matter the punishments they'd faced for aiding each other, they never left the other to suffer alone.  
Her father stood up from his throne and walked to her, reaching down to grab her by her dirty smock he hauled her up with his left hand, and struck her hard across her face with his right, then backhanding her on the other side, just to be thorough.  
She barely managed to grip the jug, half its contents had sloshed down her front and her grip was slipping, if she dropped it on him, she'd be whipped until she was bloody and screaming, the mountain only knew what he'd do to Korazsa, she secured her grip with both hands on the handle, transferred the weight of it to her right hand and fumbled it expertly to make it appear to fall accidentally to her right, away from Korazsa and her father.  
Fury flared in his eyes, as he held her level with him, "Half high fae and not one ounce of magic, if I hadn’t taken your mother as a spoil of war myself and had her locked away from the touch of any other man, I'd wonder if I'd fathered you at all. Incompetent, filthy, half-breed, I should have beaten you out of your mothers stomach!' He roared in her face, then he looked above her head and addressed his court, 'I don't need to remind you to keep your mouths shut about her parentage, shamed as I am to have this half-human cripple as a daughter, she's mine and I’ll not have her taken from my court".  
Her smock was gathered under her chin in his fist, her toes were not touching the ground and she was losing consciousness, she fought it, but as he threw her aside in disgust into the small puddle of wine, the world went black and she fell as a rag doll. Her head collided with the gilded jug, leaving her unconscious and prone on the cold stone ground.  
"Sanarie" Korazsa screamed, watching the sickening scene before her eyes and being helpless to stop it. She could speak up, yes; she could fight the steward like a Harpy, but what then? Sanarie would be punished, or she would be punished, and if the latter happened, she would probably be leaving Sanarie without a single friend in a court of living hell.  
Korazsa unsurprisingly shook consumed by anguish & fear, for herself yes, but more so for Sanarie, Keir was not going to be merciful, every ounce of pain and shame would be extracted from them, especially Sanarie, Keirs deepest shame.  
"And you. I hear you've been healing my bastard daughter again, with your magic and medicine, that, will stop. She will live with her disfigurements. She is of the Hewn City, she was born of stone and so she will live as stone". Keir spat out his punishment for Korazsa not taking his eyes from her "lock her in an Iron Womb"  
Korazsa screamed begging for anything else, so he continued "For a week, on meagre rations of bread and water. Should it be tainted on arrival, is not of my concern" he smirked sadistically.  
He turned to his daughter, and looking upon her in disgust said "put her alongside her accomplice, and see that they're suspended so no help can be given them" then as a last addition to Sanaries torment, he pulled a small dagger from a feasting table, grabbed Sanaries unconscious head from the ground by her hair, and added a half centimetre deep slit, to the top of her Fae ear, six rested there on her left ear already and nine on her right, all souvenirs of her father's hate and malice.  
"Bring seed oil and rags!" Keir demanded as he dropped Sanaries head, letting her fall to the stone with a thud. He took some spirits from the table and poured it on her bloody ear, which was making a puddle on the stone.  
An attendant arrived with a platter holding the irritant that would hinder the healing of her new ear slit, Keir grabbed a handful of the linen rags and threw them first into the alcohol, and then into the seed oil covering them in both "bandage her ear in those, see that it doesn't heal closed or you can answer for it. You may tend her ear once a day, when they lower them for food and drink, to ensure it does not close".  
The attendant bowed low, then knelt and quickly bandaged Sanarie's ear, making sure it was separated by the soaked rags, and tied some of the soaked rag around her head to secure his work.  
After watching the results of his enjoyment, he became bored, "Remove them" Keir waved from the throne, with bored nonchalance.  
Sanarie and Korazsa would be taken to an often busy avenue, placed into narrow, black, iron, coffins, and suspended above, to spend 7 days and nights, unable to sit or lie down, likely given soiled food and drink, whilst also soiling themselves. Their suffering and humiliation would be unrelenting.


	2. Chapter 2

Sanarie woke up slumped against cold, hard, iron; it was pitch black "Korazsa?"  
"Thank the mother" Korazsa’s voice broke on the last word; living through the first hours of a head injury was always tenuous, especially when you're rendered unconscious from the blow.  
"It is night?" Sanarie asked.  
"No, they just put out the torches on the avenue, no doubt an order from Keir for my suffering. Are you dizzy, headache, nauseous?" She asked.  
"Headache and dizzy" Sanarie groaned quietly, noticing the pain in her skull, ear and aching tender face. Caldron only knew how she looked, or if her nose was broken, it didn't matter, she'd look a damn sight worse in a week, and the smell, she couldn't bear to think of it.  
"I can't assess you as I usually would, I need you to put your hands on the iron and do what I say" she said.  
Sanarie shifted in the small space to unpin her arms and place in front of her "Okay, I'm ready" Sanarie answered.  
"Make circles with your thumbs on the iron, good, stop, tap your middle fingers at the same time, now separately, something a little harder; tap all ten of your fingers, starting with one pinkie on your left hand and finishing with the one on your right, one right after the other" Korazsa listened to Sanarie’s fingers trying to assess her processing ability and reaction time, it was all she could do without being able to lay eyes on her.  
"That last one wasn't great was it?" Sanarie asked, starting to feel nausea creeping up.  
"It could be worse, I will wake you every hour though, and ask you questions, at least until you're rested and more responsive, then I'll get some sleep" Korazsa sounded worried, she couldn't check Sanarie’s eyes or strength, it wasn’t even a proper test for her reflexes, but it was something.  
"Are you okay? I know this is the worst kind of punishment for you" Sanarie said, dread turning in her stomach as the nausea kicked up a notch and made her throat bob.  
"I'm okay, I panicked when the punishment was spoken, made it worse because of my state. It's never as bad as I think it will be; it's never quite like the cage during the war. I have you to worry about, that's enough distraction for me and it's not permanent, we will be out in 7 days".  
"Wake me up if you start having fearful thoughts or anxious thoughts, I don't want you suffering like that alone' Sanarie said, and then realized the inevitable after a head trauma 'Old Gods above" she said right before she threw up all over herself.  
"Oh, Sanarie' Korazsa said sympathetically 'I'm so sorry"  
"It's okay, at least I feel better now, stink and all' she said trying not to let the smell get to her, she did not want to be sick again, which would only be bile at this point anyway 'just wake me up if you need me okay?"  
"I will, I promise, now get some rest, sleep or don't, but you need rest" said Korazsa.  
Sanarie sighed at the mess all over herself and the inside of the womb, trying not to breathe through her nose at the smell. She wedged her knees, and lower back into the opposing sides of the iron womb, and listed to one side supported by her arms, it was about as comfortable as you could get in the thing.

Hour after hour, Korazsa woke Sanarie, gave her random exercises and asked her questions, all in an effort to ascertain how her head trauma was healing. Each hour was marked by the guards, walking onto the pitch black cavernous avenue, to make sure they weren’t speaking. Light from their torches illuminated a faint glow, the light trickled in around the iron womb as a guard held up a torch, checking the locks and chains binding the womb and suspending it from the rock above. Every hour once the light was gone, Korazsa knew it would be safe to speak, all be it quietly. No one had ever escaped a womb, but the guards wouldn’t dare risk the wrath of Keir Darkbringer, so every hour they checked that their prisoners were still in their prisons, and made sure they were silent, lest they make plans for an escape come dinner time, which they had done in the past and learned the hard way never to attempt such a thing again; Sanarie’s first three ear slits were gained after the attempt, amongst other scars the two now bore. Never, since the day they tried to escape, had they tried such a thing again, the punishments were not worth it. Even if they could clear the inside halls of the mountain, they knew from experience that they’d never escape Keir’s Darkbringer Warriors, through the mountains surrounding the Hewn City, there was no path to freedom from The Court of Nightmares, save death.  
"Sanarie?" Korazsa called quietly after the darkness had been uninterrupted for a few minutes.  
"Mm mm" she acknowledged, still half asleep.  
"What's your name?" Korazsa asked in a low whisper.  
"Sanarie Asperia" she replied.  
"And why are you so named?" Korazsa asked again.  
Sanarie sighed sleepily "Sanator in the old language means Healer or Curer; my mother made it a feminine name by making it Sanarie, instead of Sanator".  
"Asperia?" Korazsa reminded her.  
"The name of my mother, bestowed upon me, by her, when she was dying, so that I would never forget, that I am her child, not his"  
“Okay now finger exercises; tap out Nightsong, and quietly, if they hear us speaking, let alone tapping an Illyrian lullaby, cauldron knows what they’ll do to us” Korazsa said.  
Sanarie tapped the first lilting verse of Nightsong, remembering Korazsa teaching her the song every night before bed. After her mother had died, Korazsa’s quiet singing, and gentle hands brushing her head, were the only things which could soothe her enough to sleep.  
“Good, try tapping your pinkie on your right hand and your middle finger on your left hand at the same time, now separately, now repeat both exercises I just gave you, good job sweetie. One last question” said Korazsa  
"Isn't that enough already?" Sanarie said.  
"One more” she promised.  
Sanarie’s exhausted huff was enough to tell Korazsa that, she was still exhausted, but compliant, a good sign, being belligerent with a head wound, would have been to the contrary.  
“How many times have I woken you up tonight?" Korazsa asked the final question, this one would be a real test, if she passed it, they could both sleep for a few hours straight.  
Sanarie had to think about it, she wanted to get it right for both their sakes 'seven times?"  
"Yes, thank the mother, now we can both sleep" Korazsa said getting as comfortable as possible in the tiny space.  
"Good night, sleep well sister" Sanarie said.  
"You too' she said quietly, ready to fall asleep 'Sanarie?" She said quickly.  
"Yes?" Sanarie said.  
"When they bring our food, I'll swap with you at some point, I'll put as much healing magic in it as I can, try and eat it, no matter what they've done to it" she said, dreading the state of the food her stomach was already calling for.  
"I'll be ready, thank you for risking yourself for me, yet again" Sanarie said.  
"That's what you do for family" replied Korazsa.

Sanarie and Korazsa were woken by the shuddering of the wombs, as they were lowered by the chains to the ground, once the chains wrapped around them and the locks were removed, the iron wombs were opened to the fresh air of the mountain, it was so needed, especially in Sanarie’s case, who by this stage had not only vomited down her front, but wet herself, there were no toilet breaks for prisoners in the iron wombs.  
One blonde haired guard stepped forward and held his torch up, first to Sanarie, then Korazsa “HA, I told you, both pissed themselves and the cripple has emptied her stomach, pay up”  
The other guards stepped closer to see the females.  
A guard next to Korazsa who had pitch black hair snorted and said “Disgusting, I guess we won’t be having any fun with these ones, I’m not touching any female who’s soiled herself”.  
“You and me both’ said the leader looking on them in disdain. He had a shooting black star pinned to his left breast, a sign of his rank of lieutenant, holding his black cape around his shoulders ‘get up the two of you”  
“You’ll have to help her out, she can’t get out on her own” Korazsa informed them, she knew Sanarie couldn’t sit up on her own, not in a womb; she had to be able to roll to her side to kneel or stand.  
“I’m not touching either of you” spat the lieutenant.  
“She can’t eat or drink like that, unless you want her to choke and have to explain to Keir why his favourite pet died on your watch” Korazsa said, reading the guards and manipulating the situation expertly.  
“You help her up then” he replied.  
Korazsa got up and went to Sanarie, she’d been building her healing magic as soon as she’d woken up, and she was ready to push it into Sanarie, she grabbed her by the under arms and hoisted her up, she helped her over to a wall so she could brace herself against it while she ate and drank, all the while letting her healing magic wash over Sanarie.  
“Wait’ said the blonde haired guard ‘isn’t that one a healer?” he pointed at Korazsa.  
“Gods damn you’ the lieutenant said, and pushed her away from Sanarie ‘Ellias give them their food and water, so we can go back to our game”  
The guard with pitch black hair, called Ellias looked irritated, he stepped forward and said “next time either of you are put into a womb, you better hold it, or I’ll beat you, cut off all your hair and pull two fingernails from each hand’ he threw a piece of bread at each woman ‘I lost good money betting on you two, and now I’ll have to spend my evening finding another female to enjoy” his sickening grin darkened his face.  
Sanarie just looked at the stone, she felt numb to threats like this, she’d experienced everything awful a woman could in this world and survived it, so they wanted to make her experience it again, that didn’t mean they’d get the chance. She picked up her bread and ate it, trying not to think about what may be inside. When she was done with her bread she reached for the large jug, her only water for the day until evening, she tipped it down her front, it was cold, but it washed most of the sick from her front, and it was worth the cold and wrath of the guards, to not have to smell it for the next 7 days.  
The lieutenant took a sharp breath in and wound back his right hand, and hit her in the face “Aemon go and refill her jug”.  
The blonde haired guard nodded, took her jug and left.  
“Tend her ear while she waits” said the Lieutenant.  
The attendant stepped forward and unbound her ear wrappings, and turned to look at the guard horrified, “it has almost fully healed”  
“Then cut her again, and be sure that it looks identical to the cut her father made” the lieutenant said.  
“I do not have a knife” said the attendant.  
“Here” the lieutenant handed him his knife, and then turned to Korazsa, he walked to her and kicked her in her guts.  
“You healed her” he kicked her again.  
“Don’t you dare” he punched her in the side of the head.  
“Ever” he grabbed her by the jaw and pulled her up.  
“Try that again” he slapped her across the face leaving nail marks across her cheek.  
Korazsa to her credit, gave him a bored look between the winces of each blow.  
Sanarie whimpered as the attendant cut where her father had, she thought it was where she’d hit her head when she passed out, but no, her father had butchered her fae ears again.  
The attendant bound her ear as he had in the throne room, and stood back, waiting to make sure his work was undisturbed before he left, and he wouldn’t leave until they were hoisted into place.  
The lieutenant took the jug from Aemon, and placed it before Sanarie and said “drink it all and be quick about it, I have better things to do than smell you and your friend”.  
Sanarie took the second jug and poured it down her front again, making sure as much of the sick as possible was gone from her tunic, she wasn’t afraid of these males, they and everyone else under this mountain had nothing on her father, she’d save her fear for someone worth fearing.  
The lieutenant was angry, he sent his guards to fetch a blanket and another jug “if you weren’t Keir’s favourite pet, I’d let you go back up there thirsty and primed for hypothermia. But, as you are his favourite toy, it’s my duty to carry out your punishment AND see you alive at the end of the week, so you will be wrapped in a blanket after you’ve drank the whole pitcher”.  
As he finished, his men returned, the dark haired, cruel faced Ellias, put the jug in front of her, Sanarie braced herself on the wall, digging her fingers into a crack in the stone so she wouldn’t slip, and drained the pitcher. She was fairly certain there was urine in the jug, but thankfully, it seemed to be mostly water, so she only gagged a little and “accidentally” spilled the last little bit, which the lieutenant rolled his eyes at a little and waved the blonde guard Aemon forward to place the blanket around her.  
Aemon took care to wrap her evenly, and pin it to hold it in place, he went as far as to leave some bunched around her neck, that would be comfortable to sleep against Sanarie thought, she wondered if it was a kind mercy or just a fastidious guard doing his job.  
The lieutenant stood over Korazsa and said “help her back in, no magic this time or she’ll only have to be cut again”.  
Korazsa smiled up at him and said “what makes you think I was trying to heal her ear?”  
He scowled and dragged Korazsa to Sanarie by her hair “just put her in the damn womb and get in yours”.  
Korazsa was fighting a smile as she picked Sanarie up under the arms and helped her into her womb, making sure to fix the disturbed blanket from the move perfectly around her, so that she’d be as warm as possible.  
The guards wasted no time closing Sanarie’s womb, and then Korazsa's. They were locked, stood vertically, wrapped in chains, locked again, and then finally raised back up to the ceiling, with a system of coiled chain around, large, wooden, spools. Once the guards were gone for a few minutes, Sanarie whispered to Korazsa "Are you okay?"  
"I'm fine, had a little fun with him at the end. They're so easy to rile up" Korazsa said, amusement in her voice.  
"What were you trying to heal?" Sanarie asked.  
"Your concussion. In fact, I was trying to bend the magic anywhere but your ear, I knew they'd cut you again if it healed, the injurues were too close, I'm sorry I couldn't manage it" she said.  
"You risked a beating for me, which you got, don't be sorry, I'm grateful for your healing, your loyalty and just to have you" Sanarie said.  
"As I am, to have you, little sister" Korazsa replied.  
Life in The Court of Nightmares had taught Sanarie many things, aside from survival skills, she learned to live moment by moment, and to appreciate the people you love, while you have them.


	3. Chapter 3

"Where's the oversized bat with bad sex jokes?" Feyre asked over her wine on the terrace, at the House of Wind. She sat on the balustrade overlooking the city of Velaris, one leg crossed over the other, bouncing her foot impatiently, appreciating the craftsmanship of the leather worker, who’d etched the leather sandals with intricate patterns.  
Rhysand laughed, as he often did at Feyre’s sense of humour. He put an arm around his mate, kissed her neck and said "He was presiding over the beginning of a Blood Rite today, he'll be here soon. He's here for his badass warrior bat skills, and we keep him for his lame sex jokes"  
Cassian waltzed from between gauze curtains and said "My sex jokes may be lame, but they are better than my sex life' at this point Cassian leaned over Nesta’s shoulder and continued 'wana help me do something about that Nesta?" giving her a wink for good measure.  
She glared at him as he pulled away, one eyebrow raised and said contemptuously "I know it's hard, but try to act your age"  
"It's always hard when you're around" Cassian said. He appreciated her cornflower blue linen dress, which bought out the blue in her blue-grey eyes. Her face went to stone as she turned away, the sequins on her dress sparkling as she did so. Nesta proceeded to treat him as if he did not exist.  
Mor shook her head at Cassian "Ask yourself; has that ever worked with Nesta?" she said untucking a lock of hair from her scant billowing dress.  
Cassian perked up with grin and a swaggering step towards Mor and said "Hasn't it? How do you know that wasn't foreplay?" Mor and Amren gave Cassian disgusted looks.  
“We did not need to know that, you filthy-minded bat pup” Amren said.  
Cassian laughed hard.  
Nesta walked behind Cassian as she passed him into the dining room, and, not touching his wings, dragged one finger nail down his spine over his black cotton shirt without a single word. Cassian arched his back, and shivered, as she did so.  
Then, Nesta just kept right-on walking.  
Cassian's jaw dropped, and he turned to watch Nesta walking away to take her seat, her long dress flowing behind her, the other females in her wake.  
"She's found a new way to torment me" Cassian said, sounding frustrated and elated at the same time.  
Black moving shadows formed between the dining room where the females had moved into, and the terrace where the Illyrians stood.  
"what's that for?" Cassian asked, as soon as they’d appeared.  
"You forgot to change for dinner" Azriel said flatly, looking at his hands, which had dark wisps curling around them. His sapphire siphons flared, as he deepened the curtain shielding the females beyond.  
Rhysand also tried to find anything other than Cassian to look at. Deciding the night sky was always worthy of appreciation, he tilted his head back.  
"What is with you two? I'm fine, but Nesta needs to change for dessert" Cassian smirked, looking back over his shoulder.  
Rhysand choked on a laugh "you don't know how right you are".  
Cassian whipped his head to Rhysand and said "careful" a territorial note to his voice, to which Rhys held up his hands and chuckled.  
Feyre's apprehensive voice came down the mating bond, 'what is going on? Why has Azriel shielded the room?'  
Rhysand sent a laugh back down the bond and replied 'one of Cassian’s jokes about his family jewels, has turned out to be quite prophetic'  
Feyre's voice paused as she thought of what Cassian had joked. She realized and said 'Thank the Mother for Azriel, there are some things, I don't ever need to see'  
Rhysand sent laughter back down the bond again and said ‘you and me both. He still hasn't realized yet. We’ll join you when he's gone, or his situation has; gone down'  
'Oh, Mother help me. You're all the same. –disgusting fae males' Feyre said, levity in her voice.  
'I love you too, Feyre darling’ he said, chiding her with affectionate sarcasm ‘and you'll be glad of this disgusting male, when he has you alone later, taking off that lovely white blouse embroidered with silver constellations. If it weren’t for the delights beneath, it would almost be a shame to remove such a beautiful shirt’.  
‘Incorrigible, horny, bat’.  
Rhys laughed out loud at that.  
"I don't need to change for dinner" Cassian said incredulously.  
"You do" Azriel said.  
"Your shoes are muddy, you won't disrespect your high lord by wearing them to dinner, go change" Rhysand said, trying to coax Cassian to look at this shoes.  
Cassian snorted and said "yeah, right". Rhysand basically never gave orders.  
Azriel shook his head, playing the part as always, of the long suffering elder brother. It was a miracle he didn’t have any grey hairs after 500+ years of this.  
"For the Cauldrons sake, look at your damn shoes Cassian" Rhysand said. Rhys stared directly at him at eye level, waiting for Cassian's eyes to see his sarcastic ‘I told you so’ expression.  
Cassian looked down and then stiffened his posture, looking with wide eyes from his brothers to the wall of Azriel’s shadows, shielding the females.  
Cassian's face was flushed, as he spread his wings and rocketed skyward.  
Rhysand laughed heartily, as Azriel shook his head, lips slightly quirked to one side.  
"So who won that round?" Feyre asked the room, as Azriel and Rhysand came in from the terrace to take seats at the table.  
Nesta looked at Feyre hardly amused by the question.  
"Nes-ta" Amren slid her gaze to her, as she emphasized the syllables of her name approvingly.  
Mor chimed in "I don't know, humiliation aside’ she got the last words out through a laugh ‘apparently he enjoyed it". Clearly Feyre had enlightened the females, as to why the shadows had appeared.  
"Was only a matter of time before he ate his words" Rhysand said, watching the females with amusement in his eyes.  
"Where are Lucien and Elain?" Mor asked.  
"He's taken her for a date in the city" Azriel said.  
Nesta’s face held a disapproving expression.  
Feyre looked at her sister and said "they're happy Nesta and he never pushed her or forced her, and one day you'll understand how hard that was for him, when your mating bond snaps into place. You won't lose her just because she's found her mate"  
"I’m not afraid to lose her’ Nesta snapped ‘Let him court her, but if he ever harms her, I'll pull him apart, slowly, hair-by-hair" she said. Judging by the look in her eyes, plus her tone, she meant it and then some.  
"He wouldn't dare" Azriel said, an observation and also, a promise.  
"I mean we've come to like Lucien, but he wouldn't last a day if he hurt Elain" Rhysand said.  
"Yes, yes, we will all murder Lucien if he ever hurts that sweet female. Now let's eat, I'm starving, and I'm not waiting for that overwrought bat to sort himself out. Then decide if he can show his face again tonight" Mor said looking at the foodless table. Thinking if someone didn't summon the food from the kitchens within the next 2minutes, she'd do it herself.  
"He better be, we have things to discuss" Azriel said.  
"It's Cassian, he'll be back" Rhysand said, with a chuckle.  
"I'm sure he can catch us up, let's eat" Feyre said, waving her hand so that food appeared on the table’s surface, from the kitchens.


	4. Chapter 4

Not long after dinner had gotten underway, Cassian walked confidently back into the dining room, took the seat opposite Nesta and said whilst grinning at her "That’s what I call, progress".  
Amren sighed and said "one-for-one".  
Feyre raised her eyebrows and said to Cassian "You're pushing your luck General. If you carry on like this you're like going to pay for it. I'm not getting between you and my sister, so fair warning, you're on your own".  
"I second that" Rhys said.  
"Third" Azriel said.  
Nesta continued as she had on the terrace, and pretended he didn't exist. In fact she pretended the conversation around her, didn't exist. Devoting her attention instead, to slicing roast meats and steamed vegetables drizzled with honey.  
Then Mor said directly to Nesta, so she couldn't be ignored "just kick him in the balls next time, quicker, and he'll have none of' she trailed off and looked disapprovingly at Cassian’s proud smirking grin 'this" she finished waiving her hand at his face.  
Nesta looked at Mor and said "how about his shin instead?" Cassian squawked in protest, pushing his seat out a little from the table and looking at the females with a slackened jaw.  
Amren perked up and said "Nesta again"  
"Well, you don't waste any time" Mor said, smiling approvingly.  
"They're torturing me" Cassian said, in feigned dismay to Azriel and Rhys, massaging his shin.  
"You can’t say, you weren’t warned. We're not messing with the females, and somehow you never learn, you'll always come off second best" Rhysand said.  
"Are you done Cassian?" Azriel asked Cassian, ready to get the important conversation underway.  
Cassian sighed, looked over at Nesta pointedly and mouthed "later".  
She rolled her eyes and looked away.  
Cassian having not taken his eyes from Nesta, had a shocked look wash over his face, before it was replaced by a subtle quirk of his lips. He leaned back in his chair, looking thoroughly pleased with himself, then visibly having difficulty tearing his eyes from Nesta, he said "go on Az, I've kept you waiting long enough, you said there was news from the Hewn City"  
"Mor has a sister, and Rhysand a cousin, in the Court of Nightmares" Azriel said, not wasting a moment.  
Cassian choked a little, on the sip of wine he'd taken, upon finishing speaking.  
Nesta paused her eating at the statement, but continued on as if she was listening, and would only intervene if the conversation became relevant to her.  
Mor looked down the table gawking at Azriel "no prepare yourselves, just announce; oh by the way, you have a family member you never knew about".  
Rhysand looked shocked "are you sure?”  
Azriel’s expression didn't change, as he said "yes, she's a half-sister, unknown mother, deceased".  
"So this girl, just happens to crop up after the whole mess with Amarantha is over, after Velaris is revealed, after the war against Hybern is won? She chose a lovely time to exist" Amren said, sceptically.  
"He has no designs on inserting her into the Court of Dreams; he doesn’t value her enough to use her like that. She’s a secret he’s tried to mask form us, for centuries’ Azriel was still trying to learn how Keir had kept such a monumental secret for so long, but his spies had been unable to find out. Azriel knew he would learn the information sooner or later, maybe that would alleviate some of his guilt ‘I am sure she's Keir's bastard daughter and that was not of her choosing" Azriel said to Amren, he'd known it would be sensitive information, and that everyone would react to it differently, so he was prepared for the endless questions.  
“If you say so Spymaster” Amren said .  
"Perhaps it will be best for you to just tell us everything you know Az, and then we can go from there" Feyre said.  
Azriel nodded a small bow to his High Lady, took a deep breath, and started to divulge everything he knew, whilst still expecting to be interrupted at anytime. For his High Lady did not know the horrors they were about to learn. "She's not much younger than you Mor, she was born during the first war with Hybern. Unbeknown to us, Keir and his Darkbringer Warriors took females as spoils of war; some Human, some Illyrian. She was sired from Keir and a prisoner of war; Human, no doubt about that. Your father would not share this particular woman with anyone, so we know she is his child".  
Azriel had been watching Mor, as she processed the news. He noted her outrage at the way he’d announced it, and watched that outrage slip into quiet anxiety, as the power of truth in her, told her it was indeed her sister.  
"Does he" Mor searched for the right word, love wasn't it, her father wasn't capable of anything resembling love 'favour her?".  
Azriel shook his head twice and said "She's his favourite toy, and that's not a station anyone would want for".  
Mor stood up at this, tears pooling in her eyes, horrific ideas and memories flooding her mind "how, how did you only find this out now? It's been 500 years!"  
Feyre walked to Mor, helped her back into her chair, and put her hand on her back, she preceded to rub it gently in comfort "sit down, have a drink, a strong one. Let Azriel finish, then we will decide what to do, together".  
"Keir kept it a secret for many centuries. The past 50years his Inner Court has known her identity, but no one else, not lesser fae or servants, none but Keir’s personal attendant, servants are sent out and not summoned back until he is done tormenting her. A few of his closest Darkbringers are also aware of her parentage. These 5 decades under Amarantha’s rule have been optimal cover for Keir to get away with keeping a few secrets, which is no excuse, I have failed you, your sister and Rhysand, and I am sorry for it".  
"The past 50years was trying for all of us, you're not too he blamed Azriel, and as for the centuries preceding that, none of us can be blamed for the things which Keir chooses to hide from all, but himself. The only thing which matters is what we do now that we know about her" Rhysand said.  
Azriel nodded at Rhysand grateful for his words, though nonetheless blaming himself for not being more vigilant with Keir and his court, even with everything else on his plate as Spymaster.  
"How did you get the information?" Mor demanded.  
"My methods are my own" Azriel said.  
"Spymasters are entitled to their secrets girl" Amren chided.  
Mor, experiencing memories she'd rather forget, whilst wondering how similar her sisters fate had been, cried silent tears.  
"This information was valuable; it made me look at Keir and The Court of Nightmares more closely these past few months” Azriel said.  
"Months? You've known about her for months?" Mor asked, angrily.  
"I had to be sure, I sent my Spy in that court to get more information, he has and not just on your sister" Azriel said patient as ever. He could see Mor was having trouble with this, and it pained him to see.  
"What's her name?" Mor asked.  
"Sanarie" Azriel said. His heart skipped a beat over her name, guilt lingered there, especially now. He had waited months, Mor was right; he should have told them as soon as he’d known.  
"Sanarie" Mor whispered to herself. She was contemplating the name, perhaps swirling it around, in a pool of her truth magic within her, trying to discern more about this long lost sister. How had she slipped through their fingers?  
"What powers does she have? She's half High Fae after all" Rhysand said.  
"None. Not a drop of magic, she's completely barren of it" Azriel said.  
"Her human side must have won out?" Cassian said rhetorically.  
"What other information have you discovered?" Rhysand asked. Not entirely sure he wanted that answer, as things were only just starting to normalize for his court, since the war.  
"There is a shadow around the Court of Nightmares, not just the dark of the mountain halls; it is a cold and lifeless darkness, like it’s barren of soul, but has ears and eyes. I’ve never sensed a darkness like it’ Azriel took what looked like a deep cleansing breath and continued ‘that’s not all, my spy has recently seen treasures being taken from the mountain, not many, and he does not know where they were taken, but Keir is gifting them or paying for something, that much is clear”  
“If you can get me into the trove in the Hewn City, I’m sure I can identify the artefacts which are missing” Amren said. Having been in the trove with Nesta the year before when she was still a divine being, crammed into a high fae body. She knew she had retained the memory of every object, some which she’d love to have for herself, some, she never desired to see again.  
“That could be helpful” Azriel said, with a nod to Amren in acknowledgement. “Is it safe for us to go extract her, with this darkness that even Azriel is wary of?” Cassian asked, sorting everything out in his mind, so that he could make a plan.  
“If we can get in un-announced, surprise them, and be quick about our visit, I don’t think Keir will have a chance to try anything” Azriel said.  
Cassian turned to Rhys, and said “if you want to get her out of there…”  
“Sanarie, her name is Sanarie. And it’s not an if, it’s a when we are getting her out” Mor said.  
If there was a chance, however small, that her sister was not beyond saving, she had to try.  
"Yes, we will" Feyre said, still rubbing Mor's, back in an attempt to comfort her.  
“Of course we will get Sanarie out of there, it will be best if we can just make her disappear, Keir doesn’t need to know it was us who took her” Rhysand said.  
“Agreed” Azriel said.  
“We should have some Illyrian Warriors waiting nearby, he’s clearly up to something, and if he has the upper hand already, we could be heading straight into a trap” Cassian said.  
“Bringing Illyrian warriors to the mountain, in my father's eyes, would be as good as declaring war” Mor said.  
“I think I should try and extract her alone, before we plan anything else” Azriel said.  
“Azriel and Mor are right. If we can get her out, without any ties to us, and without angering Keir, that would be ideal. Especially as we do not yet know, what he is up to” Rhysand said.  
“When will you go?” Mor asked Azriel.  
“In a few days, when the festivities of Summer Solstice are a good distraction, apparently it’s the one night of the year she’s allowed out of the mountain” Azriel’s heart tugged at the thought, he understood all too well, what it was to be caged. He looked at Mor to see how she’d taken that last awful bit of information, and sure enough that was sadness in her eyes, the same reflected in his; as they both thought of the 500 years Sanarie had been wholly trapped under the mountain, with Keir Darkbringer.  
"Where should we prepare a room for her? If we get her out, we need to be safe, while we ascertain if she's a danger to us, but I also want her to feel comfortable. I don't want to move her from one prison to another" Mor said, thinking of what needed to be done before her sister, came to be with them.  
"The Library with the Priestesses might be ideal; it'll be dark, so it would be an environment she's used to. She'd also be solely in the company of women, who have been where she is" Rhysand said.  
"I know, but I want her to feel at home too. And what if she is dangerous? We can't leave her with the priestesses, they are under our protection too and we can't put a threat in their midst" Mor said, feeling conflicted in her loyalties and duty of care.  
"True, Mor" Rhysand said.  
"Why don't we prepare a room in the house of wind? We can make sure there are heavy curtains, so she can block out the light, and acclimatize to the light at her own pace. She'll be close enough for us to monitor, and we can post a few guards near to her until we’re sure of her intentions and character. She’ll be far enough away from the priestesses to keep them safe and close enough to feel a part of her new life" Feyre offered.  
"Perfect" Rhysand said, giving his mate a weary smile, and reaching out to caress the back of her hand with his fingers.  
Mor just nodded, lost in thought.  
It was amazing how foggy a mind could get, when emotion clouded it. For Mor and Rhys, knowing they could have saved her at any time; had they only been aware of her existence, was a blow to their hearts, and a weight to their shoulders.  
"We should introduce her to Elain, as soon as possible after she arrives. If anyone can see who she is, and what she's capable of it will be Elain" Azriel said.  
"You will do no such thing. I won't have you putting Elain in a room with a female who could be dangerous" Nesta said, who had kept quiet and minded her own business, until this moment.  
"Do you think I would allow Elain to be put in a room, with someone who we do not know, alone and unprotected?" Azriel asked.  
"No. But that doesn’t mean your judgement on this will be sound" Nesta said, staring down Azriel.  
Azriel stared right back, stony-faced as per usual.  
“Nesta what do you mean; that doesn’t mean your judgement on this will be sound?” Feyre asked.  
“He knows” Nesta said, having not looked away from the Shadowsinger.  
“I don’t” Azriel said, genuinely unaware of whatever it was Nesta had gleamed, that he had not.  
“You do Shadowsinger, but you’ve mistaken it for something else” Nesta said.  
“What are you on about? You’re starting to sound like Elain” Cassian said.  
Nesta whipped her head away from Azriel to Cassian and said “And just where do you think I got this knowledge?”  
“What did she say?” Feyre asked.  
“I am not the seer, go ask Elain” Nesta said, growing more irritable by the second.  
“I will” Azriel said.  
Nesta huffed and said “Well whatever happens, you will not put Elain in a room with her, if I’m not present”.  
“Done” Azriel said.  
“I think it’s time I put Nesta to bed” Cassian said.  
“Now Cassian, really? Do you value your life at all?” Rhysand asked, smiling apprehensively at Cassian’s daring with Nesta.  
Nesta looked at Cassian, eyes filled with rage. She got up from the table and said “I’m finished; I’m going back to the town house’ she moved over to Azriel, and said ‘fly me” she wouldn’t ask Feyre, when her Mate and someone akin to a sister clearly needed her.  
Apparently “done” had been a sufficient enough truce for Nesta and a better option than Cassian, to ask the Shadowsinger.  
“Cassian will take you, I cannot” Azriel said.  
She just turned and walked into the hall saying “I’ll walk”.  
“I’ll walk with you” Cassian said, as he followed her.  
“No you won’t” Nesta said, stopping abruptly.  
“I can fly you, or you can put up with me for every one of the 10,000 steps down to the town house” Cassian said, looking as if he already knew the answer.  
Nesta could be seen taking a deep breath in the hallway, whilst looking up at Cassian “Fine” was all she said.  
Cassian swept her off her feet, “I can walk to the terrace” she said, glaring at his face, arms crossed across her chest.  
“That won’t be necessary” Cassian said, as he carried her through the dining room, and launched them into the sky on the terrace.  
“Caldron boil me. Cassian bested her again” Amren said.  
Feyre huffed a chuckle through her nose and shook her head. The new Amren had taken time to emerge, she still had her days when the old Amren showed herself; superior, irritable and chiding. Now though, she was more prone to levity and playfulness, in her own dry way. The loss of her grace had changed her, of course, but the mating bond with Varian had altered her most, and with him preparing to move to the The City of Starlight, she supposed the new Amren was here to stay.  
“I have preparations to make”Azriel said, not moving, it was a statement, but also a request to leave.  
“Thank you Az, you can go. And Azriel, whatever the reasons are for us not knowing, they’re not down to you, I know you, as if you were my own brother. Your Shadowsinging powers are not infallible, nor is Mor’s truth, Elain’s Seers ability, or the powers of any one of us” Rhysand said, trying to absolve Azriel of the guilt he knew was haunting him.  
“I wouldn’t be surprised if Keir managed to find some kind of spell, to stop Sanarie’s existence being exposed. Powerful Shadowsinger or not, my father would have gone to the ends of the earth to protect this secret, he lost me 500 years ago, I can imagine he was determined not to lose his other daughter” Mor said.  
Azriel stood in an archway on the terrace, “thank you, both” he said, before he surrounded himself in shadows, flew into the sky and winnowed.  
“Will he ever forgive himself for not knowing?” Feyre asked.  
“Not likely” Amren said.  
“I need to fly” Rhysand said.  
“I’ll come, unless you want to be alone?” Feyre said.  
“You better come, you’re the best medicine I have” Rhysand said.  
“Drop me off at my loft first?” Amren asked. Rhysand nodded.  
“And you Mor?” Feyre asked.  
“I’ll sleep here, until she gets here and probably after that as well’ Mor said, drinking red wine deep in thought ‘I want to start preparing her a room”  
“Give her any room you like” Rhysand said. It was hard for Rhysand to imagine the life Sanarie had lived. He couldn’t imagine how she would be, after enduring it all this time. He, like Mor, wanted her to feel like she’d come home, wanted her to know she was safe.  
“I want to give her one overlooking the Sidra and a park, or at least a street kids regularly play in, so she can watch the children play, so that when she’s ready to look, she knows immediately the kind of place she’s come to” Mor said.  
“I think that’s a beautiful idea” Feyre said.  
A part of Rhysand worried, that Sanarie could be so scarred from 500 years in The Court of Nightmares, that she could be a danger to them, and would not be able to be saved from who she had become.  
“Will you be okay?” Rhysand asked Mor.  
“Yes, I am not the one who has lived that life” she said.  
“That may be the truth, but it hurts no less for us to understand the suffering of it” he replied.  
Rhys put his hand on her shoulder, as a comfort before he, Feyre and Amren quietly left.


	5. Chapter 5

Azriel emerged from the windy darkness of the between space that is winnowing, to the centre of Velaris, flying high above, obscured from sight by his shadows in the night sky. He sent whispers of shadows to search the city for Elain and Lucien, it was not long before they were done scouting for him and began reporting back.  
The time alone in the sky was just what he needed, as he waited for each whisp, one after the other reporting back to him; "No sighting, Artisan Quarter", "No sighting, Trades Quarter". Azriel savoured each beating of his wings, the feeling of the wind lifting his wings without his efforts, on the occasional gust of wind from the mountains, and that same fresh air off the mountains filling his lungs. The sky, as always, contented his mind, until he could speak with Elain, this was the place to be, alone.  
One shadow, one of the last to report back whispered to him, “Pots of Eden, Garden Quarter”; of course Lucien would take her to the Garden Quarter, he knew what his mate loved and craved.  
He winnowed to the small lane next to the restaurant nursery, seeing immediately why Lucien chose this place, the front steps and window sills all held different sizes of pots with; herbs, flowers, young fruit plants, everything you could think of. Each pot was different, in size and shape, even decorated differently; some painted, some etched and some plain, all with a tag of sale. The meals were served in clay pottery, some glazed with varying colours and patterns, others left glazed with their natural earthy colors. It was a humble place, but as with all things, clean presentation and kind service, made it a lovely place to eat and a favourite of the city at large.  
The Garden Quarter was made beautiful by the people who lived there, an excess of trees and flowers, planted by those who appreciated earth and new life the most. These trees and flowers lined every street and every window, held a box full of colourful life. In a four block, by four block radius, the Garden Quarter lined the Sidra on the north side, the rainbow of Velaris on the east, the mountains to the south and the mouth of the river to the west, with the house of wind north east of it.  
He lingered in the dark lane next to the restaurant, folding the darkness of Velaris around him, rendering himself near-invisible to the eye. He could see the small garden restaurant, where Lucien had taken Elain for their date. A group of musicians played somewhere inside the restaurant, their strains of music carried outside quietly, as Lucien and Elain sat at a small balcony table on the first floor. Plant boxes lined the wrought iron balustrade and flowers in a low vase adorned the table, Lucien had done well for his nature-loving mate. Azriel wanted just five minutes with Elain, he couldn’t wait after what Nesta had said, he needed to know, and checking up on Elain was of concern for him too.  
It warmed his heart to see her smiling and looking at Lucien as she did, he held her hand and brushed his thumb across the back of it, looking at her as if she’d hung every star in the glorious Night Court sky.  
"Are you still hungry? I could go order some dessert?" Lucien asked her.  
"That would be nice" Elain said, looking a little shy, but happy under Lucien's gaze.  
Azriel could sense Lucien’s lust for Elain, his instinct to claim her, but the action he witnessed was gentle, patient and nothing close to what Lucien’s body and mind were telling him to do, as a fae male in the presence of his mate.  
Azriel had witnessed this a few times before with Rhysand and Feyre, Lucien and Elain, and even on occasion Cassian and Nesta, although the latter still hadn’t had their mating bond snap into place, Azriel felt it would only happen, once Cassian managed to shatter that impenetrable wall, which Nesta held up for everyone but Elain. He thought her defences had come down during the last war with Hybern, but the loss of her father, had put that wall up stronger than ever. Almost dying wasn’t enough for Nesta to embrace Cassian, or even just let down that wall, not for good. Azriel couldn’t fathom how Cassian would do it, but every now and then, like tonight, she responded with something other than cold indifference or pure contempt.  
Lucien moved his hand from hers, he reached up to cup her face, as he brushed his fingers into her hair around her ear, he said "I would wait countless years for you, there's no rush. Just time, with you, that's all I need, for as long as this is all you need, all you're ready for" Lucien said, expressing aloud something he felt, which travelled along the mating bond from his mate.  
"It's just' Elain paused to find the words 'it has been a big year, so much change, things have happened which in my other life, I would have never daydreamed of, let alone thought possible. You think you're going to live your short mortal life one way, one specific way until you die, and then it's changed forever, it takes time to adjust to a completely new reality"  
"I know' Lucien said, so much gentleness, in those two, brief words 'I will wait". No time limits, no conditions; it was just a simple, earnest, promise.  
Azriel felt a small pang of guilt, as he sent some shadows to Lucien’s mind, where they suggested he go and find Elain the perfect plant as a gift and order that dessert at the same time. He could not control minds as Rhysand, but he could send shadows to suggest. It was dependant on the person and the context of suggestion, which determined its success. Azriel watched as Lucien excused himself to go order dessert, he winnowed closer when the coast was clear, he kept himself near-invisible in an alcove of the facade to the right of Lucien and Elain’s table.  
“Azriel?” Elain asked, looking across the table, over the back of Lucien’s chair, into the darkness of the alcove beyond.  
He released the shadows which melded him into the darkness “I’m sorry to bother you” Azriel said.  
Elain surveyed him, her head tilted to the side “She told you” Elain said, smiling in realization of why he’d come.  
“Not exactly” Azriel said.  
“You want me to tell you, all?” Elain asked, her voice lilting up at the end.  
“Please” Azriel said, in his low voice, the contrast to Elain’s.  
Elain closed her eyes and took a deep breath, as if summoning the message she’d already received, to come to her seers mind again. Her breathing slowed and a word started to form in her mind, interchanged with images. She interpreted them as she had to Nesta, when the message had come over tea one afternoon, months before.  
“Souls of light are born with the stars. Once in an aeon they come together, the souls born of just one star. From this star come a light, and a life, rarer than the rest. Together again, light in the darkness, they are reunited once more” Elain opened her eyes, and her breathing normalized.  
Azriel was confused and asked “What does that mean? And why would Nesta think it could impair my judgment?” Azriel asked.  
“I see a night sky full of stars, and the birth of souls, I also see the word “together” over and over again. I see familiar faces and those of strangers, all together, all happy, a family of soul, born of the same star. Then I see a light, encompassed by darkness, in the dining room at the House of Wind. Can you not see, what I see Azriel? If not, can you not feel it?” Elain asked.  
Azriel sighed and winnowed to Lucien’s seat, sitting down and massaging his head. His own gifts failed him when trying to learn truth for himself, there were things a person was not meant to know -about themselves. He hoped the mother could help him interpret Elain’s words, where he could not “Can you just tell me straight?” Azriel asked.  
“I have” Elain said, sounding confused.  
Azriel sighed and said “I take it part of that is about us, all of us, the Night Court?”  
A proud smile bloomed on Elain’s face and she said “Very good, I knew you could do it”  
He looked at her and shook his head in amused exasperation “What is the light in the darkness, at the House of Wind?”  
She looked at him as if he already knew, but was being an idiot.  
He huffed a laugh as he only did with her and said “Well if that’s as decoded as the riddle will be, I will leave you to enjoy your mate”  
Elain smiled and said “Exactly”  
“Poetic pest” Azriel said, in jest.  
She laughed and said “I love you too”  
Azriel winnowed back to the lane, and sent shadows to nullify his scent at the table; the last thing he wanted, was to ruin her special night with her mate, and a jealous fae male, scenting another, would be exactly the way to do it.  
“Thank you” he heard Elain say, in a sing song way, which carried on the air.  
He moved his fingers, manipulating his power through his siphons and wrapped some shadows around Elain’s shoulders and collarbone, in a hug.  
She glanced over her shoulder to the lane smiling at him, as an adoring little sister does, and then back to the table, as Lucien returned with a perfect white orchid in full bloom. It sat in a black stone pot, carved with stars which were painted white, and presented it to her.  
“For you, my lovely” Lucien said, as he placed it in front of her.  
Elain smiled up at him, bigger than she had at Azriel’s triumph of deciphering her riddles, she said “thank you, it’s beautiful”  
“Not as beautiful as you’ Lucien said, earnestly, as he lent down to kiss her forehead, which earned him an even bigger smile ‘as for desert, they’ve said we can go into the back courtyard, and pick the fruits of our choice, to have with ice-cream, yoghurt, cream, or a fruit puree, whatever you wish. I thought you might enjoy some time in the garden this evening”.  
Azriel’s mouth quirked in a smile, Lucien was good for her, he understood her and he had done well finding this place, it was Elain all over. Elain was happy and safe, that was all he needed, even if he could not decipher her whole message, his visit had still been a success. He took his leave, deciding to winnow to the mountains, which held the Hewn City, so that he could scout for his rescue mission. No doubt preparations would be underway for the Summer Solstice; he would mark every lantern and bonfire on the mountainside, for the night he went to retrieve Sanarie. He hoped the back-up plan would not be needed, but you never went into a situation like this, without at least two modes of escape. On foot may be necessary, in that eventuality, he needed to know where the points of darkness and places to hide would be.

Sanarie woke in the afternoon after a nap, on the fifth day, Summer Solstice, to the sound of music.  
“Do you hear the music Korazsa? That’s something we can enjoy” Sanarie said.  
“There’s no music Sanarie, are you feeling okay?” Korazsa said, concern in her voice.  
“A little dizzy, but okay. Are you sure you can’t hear music? Not that low hum? Or the deep urgent drums? Or those lazy whimsical flutes?” Sanarie said.  
“No. Whatever you do Sanarie, do not sing what you hear okay? Especially if you start hearing words. We’ll be in trouble, you especially, you’ve been through enough already and the week isn’t through yet” Korazsa said, trying to convince Sanarie to resist the music. She did not know what would happen if Sanarie sang, what only she could hear.  
“Okay, you’re sure you can’t hear anything? It is distant, very faint, but you’re sure you can’t hear it if you try?” Sanarie asked, starting to feel anxious. How could she hear something if it wasn’t there?  
Korazsa feigned listening in silence, though she knew very well she would hear nothing “No, I can’t, it’s a shame, but we cannot sing along anyway, okay?” Korazsa said.  
“I know, don’t worry” Sanarie said.  
"EY! Shut your mouths, I hear you talking" the mean faced Elias yelled up at them.  
"That one has been ordered released two days early" the lieutenant said, as he pointed at Korazsa's iron womb.  
“Should I let her womb down?” asked Elias.  
“Yes let’s get this over with, so we can go enjoy Summer Solstice. Keir has given his permission for that one, to be left unattended, we just have to take her down and add extra chains. Keir has told everyone they are free to throw rocks at the womb this evening, whenever they pass, so she will be watched, by many eyes tonight” the Lieutenant said.  
Elias laughed, a dark amused laugh, and started lowering Korazsa down, as the Lieutenant lowered Sanarie. Once the chains were off and the fresh air filled her lungs, Korazsa was told to get out of her iron womb, and the chains which bound her womb were bound around Sanarie’s.  
“What are you doing, it’s time for the evening meal?” Korazsa said, if they were doing this now, they had no intentions of feeding her or giving her any water.  
Elias and the guard laughed “she’s not getting fed tonight, Keir’s orders” the Lieutenant said, as he and Elias made quick work of the chains, wrapping them vertically around the womb.  
“I’ll see you in two days Sanarie, I love you” Korazsa said.  
The Lieutenant turned fury on his face and backhanded Korazsa “You will not speak to the prisoner, and you will not see her in two days, you will return tomorrow morning to help her out of the womb for her morning meal. We are not touching either of you filthy females”  
“Fine” was all Korazsa said, she had things to see to, not least her soiled and filthy state after five days in that hell hole, guilt gripped her heart as she was forced to walk away and leave Sanarie there, alone, on her favourite night of the year.  
Before Korazsa could reach the black stairs to the servant’s halls, she could hear the clattering of the chains, as Sanarie’s womb was raised back off the ground. It sped her pace, though her body was stiff, and sore from five days without movement, she needed to make sure their room had not been raided; by other servants, or guards. If they’d taken her supply of Sanarie’s tonic, she would be in danger. She would find a way to get it to her tonight, Sanarie needed her medicine.


	6. Chapter 6

"You ready Az?" Rhysand asked, just before nightfall, in the living room of the townhouse.  
"Yes, I scouted thoroughly after dinner the other night. The cover of night, and the Summer Solstice festivities, should be all the distraction I need to get in, find her and get her out" Azriel said, a battlement of weapons hung about him.  
Mor walked into the living room, having winnowed into the hall moments before. She was also furnished with weapons, bright seraphim weapons, gifted to her by Drakon after the first War with Hybern.  
"I'm going with you" Mor said.  
"No" Azriel said.  
Rhysand casually slid his hand into his pocket and retrieved a letter from the Cursed Queen Vassa, he proceeded to wholly focus on rereading the letter. He sprawled himself in a large arm chair, clearly showing he’d leave this disagreement to his third in command and his Spymaster. They’d discussed the plan of action as a group and Mor hadn’t raised her joining Azriel then, or after. Mor could handle herself, that wasn’t the problem, if Azriel really thought it wasn't best, for her, himself, Sanarie or the Night Court in general, he would never allow it. A smooth extraction was their best bet to avoid any conflict with Keir, which aside from rescuing Sanarie from that hell, was the most important thing. If Mor was caught sneaking back into her fathers house, no love lost between them, with an Illyrian, to kidnap her sister out from under her fathers nose; that would not go down well.  
"She's MY sister. Do you know how many nights growing up there, that I lay in bed, wishing someone would show up and say 'you were stolen from your rightful parents, this is not your family, we're taking you home', do you!? I want to be that person for her" Mor argued.  
Azriel's heart hurt at that, he remembered similar thoughts from his isolated childhood, but tonight wasn't the time for dreams, he was going to The Court of Nightmares, "Remember the darkness I spoke of? That is the reason I go in alone. That and if I am caught, which is a slim chance but still a chance, if I was caught with your sister AND you, can you even imagine what they’d do to you? I can’t see you like that again Mor, it was 500 years ago and I still cannot forget what they did to you" Azriel said.  
Mor stood looking at him, he’d never said anything like that out loud before, not so openly “I understand that, but I can handle Keir”  
“With all due respect you can’t, not when we’re going in alone, if I put you in a room alone with Keir I have no doubt you could best him, but not like this Mor. I won’t risk it for you or your sister, not when we’re going into a mountain full of Darkbringers, without Rhysand, Feyre and Cassian coming with us” Azriel said.  
Mor marched up to Azriel, pointing her finger at his chest and said staring up at him "I've fought wars with you, or have you forgotten about that?"  
Azriel's expression did not change, “I said no"  
"Cauldron damn you, I'm going!" Mor said.  
"Morrigan, I said no" Azriel said, in a commanding voice.  
Rhysand looked up from the letter at Azriel, mouth slightly open at hearing his tone, which he'd only heard him use on a handful of occasions, in the past 500+ years.  
Mor pulled her head back a bit looking at Azriel in shock, he used the moment to his advantage, he grabbed her hand, and winnowed.  
As soon as they manifested in mid-air above the House of Wind, Azriel swooped and collected Mor in his arms, she knew exactly what he was going to do "NO!' she yelled at him, trying to grab onto his leathers 'please Azriel I want to be there"  
Azriel landed on the sparring ring which was above the house. He set her down, removing her hands from him and binding them with dark whisps of shadow, her feet too, so that she couldn't grab him or chase him as he moved away.  
He'd set her down at the upper most point, of the one building in Velaris, which he knew she’d be safe in, until he got back.  
"Azriel" Mor yelled, as he rocketed into the air and disappeared, taking his shadow restraints with him. Leaving Mor stuck at the House of Wind, 10,000 steps from the ability to winnow.

Azriel arrived at a slope between two mountains, not far from the Hewn City, the dense tree cover was ideal for the brief meeting, which was about to take place.  
It wasn’t long before he heard snapping wood underfoot, he shielded himself with darkness, but it was unnecessary, when he saw Aemon emerge from between two trees. Azriel threw the shield outwards and encompassed the two of them, hiding them from prying eyes and ears.  
“Where is Sanarie?” Azriel asked his only spy remaining in the court. Between Amarantha’s rule and the war with Hybern, his other spies in this court had been killed, replacing them was always going to prove difficult, in a court where no one could be trusted.  
Aemon looked his master in the eyes and said “She has been in an iron womb for the past five days, suspended above the Cavernous Avenue. Keir has made it known that whomever should pass the avenue tonight, should have a stone with them to throw at the womb, so she may not be alone when you get there. I cannot be missing long”  
“Is that all?” Azriel asked.  
“There’s a recess high in the cavern above the avenue, it would be a good vantage point for you to get your bearings and make a plan. You should know, she has only been let out twice a day for long enough to eat bread and water, which I made sure was fresh, on every occasion I was present’ Aemon paused, he looked down as he said ‘she’s soiled herself that whole time, that’s a mercy though, the guards won’t touch them when they come out like that”  
“Thank you Aemon” Azriel said, grateful for any small kindness shown Sanarie. He tried not to think about what that meant; ‘the guards won’t touch them’.  
Aemon bowed slightly at the waist and recited the spy creed “It’s an honour to be in your service; Spymaster. I pledge my loyalty to you; this day, and every other. I pledge my knowledge to you; this day, and every other. On my honour as a spy for the Shadowsinger, I am bound by my word”  
Azriel nodded and waved a hand away, signalling him to leave. He pulled his shadows close, shielding himself and winnowed to the cavernous avenue. Azriel remained cloaked in darkness and near-invisible in the natural darkness, which was the Court of Nightmares. As he surveyed overhead for the cavity in the rock, which Aemon said would be there, as soon as he spotted it he winnowed for it.  
Azriel spent a few minutes analysing the avenue, from his position high above, in a dark recess chiselled into the rock, which lead no-where. The avenue was roughly carved compared to most of the Hewn City; there were no decorative sculptures, pillars or patterns in the rock here. It was close to the servant’s quarters, if he wasn’t mistaken, so that was likely why it seemed so barren. On each side of the flat avenue was a treacherous drop, no railings, it was wide, but that was the only consolation as far as safety. Some young high fae were moving into sight on the avenue, they stopped and began emptying their pockets into their hands, then pelted rocks up at the iron box. The clangs of the rock on the iron were loud in the hard cavernous space, he couldn’t imagine how loud it was for Sanarie, it infuriated him, this senseless cruelty. He was about to summon darkness, and use his siphons to shape it into a monster, then winnow from his position into the thick of it masking himself and the womb. It would give him plenty of time to shatter the chain, get her out of that tiny prison and winnow her, to just outside the house of wind.  
Just as he was about to make his move, a dark-skinned woman, charged onto the avenue and screamed “Leave her!’ she made for the young males and said ‘If I catch you here again tonight, I’ll throw you from the avenue!”.  
The high fae young males, heeded her advice, turning white at the sight of her, she was fierce to behold, knife in hand and carrying herself with what looked to be a warriors stance; if Azriel wasn't mistaken.  
Then the woman did something even braver, she started letting down the womb, Azriel winnowed closer, but made sure to stay behind the woman and cloaked in his shadows. Once the womb was down, she used her magic to unclasp the locks, she pulled off the chains and wrenched open the womb.  
“Sanarie, I’ve got your medicine” the woman said holding out a bottle.  
Azriel noted the familiarity of her voice, but couldn't tie it to a face or a memory.  
“Korazsa what have you done, you can’t be here’ she said, as she tried to pull the door shut over her ‘you must replace the chains and put me back, quickly” Sanarie said, she sounded weary, as she opposed her friend.  
Azriel was shocked, she had willingly shut herself back into that thing, for this woman, who was clearly putting herself at great risk for Sanarie. Loyalty. In the Court of Nightmares, that’s what he was witnessing, loyalty and love. And all for this medicine; was Sanarie sick? Aemon had said she was barren of magic, so she must get sick as a mortal human did. Azriel had seen enough to know neither of these females was a danger to himself, Sanarie, or their escape, so he threw out his shadows, masking himself and the two females.  
They both yelped as the shadows passed through them, then blocked out the small bit of light there had been. Hearing their alarm, Azriel flared his siphons so that his hands radiated a dim sapphire light, it wasn’t much, swallowed up easily by the pitch black darkness, but it was something. He took the medicine from Korazsa, and tucked it inside his Illyrian leather vest, securing it into the secret pocket which lay there.  
As soon as Azriel drew nearer, he smelled what Aemon had prepared him for, the air was permeated with; ammonia, and excreta, with a tinge of vomit and dried blood. It was about as bad as he’d imagined, but he would never let her see it, she did not deserve to be shamed for this, he pitied her for her suffered existence, but she would never see that in his face either.  
Korazsa had put herself between Sanarie and Azriel, she held up a dagger, an Illyrian dagger, Azriel raised his eyebrows at that; a High Fae with an Illyrian dagger, in the Court of Nightmares, under a man whom loathed the Illyrian race. Very curious, he wanted to get to the bottom of that one, one day, but not now.  
“I’m here to get her out” Azriel said.  
“You’re not taking her, I won’t let you” Korazsa said, lunging forward with the knife.  
Azriel stepped back and gave her ground, holding up his hands siphons facing her, so she could see he hadn’t armed himself.  
“You didn’t hear me. I’m here to rescue her, to take her to Velaris, to her sister, Morrigan” Azriel said, waiting for the words to sink in.  
“Who are you, show yourself” said Korazsa.  
Azriel realized, whilst he’d thrown his major shield out to encompass all three of them, a shield which completely obscured them from view, he had maintained the shadows around himself and his wings, that between the only light being his siphons she couldn’t see him.  
“Sorry” Azriel said, dropping the shadows and holding one hand next to his face, letting the siphons reveal who he was.  
“Azriel, Shadowsinger” Korazsa said in a whisper.  
“Yes, now let me take her” Azriel said, still being unable to place that voice.  
Korazsa stepped aside.  
Azriel wondered why she’d given in to him so quickly, trusted him enough to let him pass, from the fierce opposition, to this complete surrender. Most people who didn’t know much about him except his darkness, battle savvy and power, feared him, she feared what she couldn’t see, but nothing when he revealed himself. Why? Azriel lent down to the womb and put his hands on the iron rim, so she could see his face in the glow of the siphons, he hoped whatever reason her friend had to not fear him, knowing his identity, held the same significance for Sanarie “I won’t hurt you” he said, assuring her; ignoring the smell, which was not her fault.  
“I know” was all she said, she was weak, exhausted, he could hear it in her voice.  
“She cannot get out on her own” Korazsa said, moving to help Sanarie out.  
Azriel scooped her up before Korazsa could get to her, and set her on her feet, Sanarie cried in pain and doubled over, as she rubbed the middle of her back. Korazsa held her elbow helping Sanarie balance and get her bearings.  
“Your back is cramping and sore?” Korazsa asked.  
“Yes, I feel dizzy and ill, I think it’s mostly hunger and the pain’ Sanarie stumbled, then said in a quiet sigh ‘oh”  
Azriel scented the change in her and grabbed her under the arms just before she passed out “Did he have her whipped?” he asked fury rippling through him.  
“No, it’s an old wound, made worse by the position she was forced into for the past five days. That and the lack of pain relieving poultices and my healing magic, which I usually administer every night, has put her back in a vulnerable position. It’s not often that she is overwhelmed by the pain, I don’t let it get to that, but it has been out of my hands” Korazsa explained, hand on Sanarie’s back giving her some healing magic, at this Azriel noted Korazsa’s scent; salty sea air and warm leather. It had been difficult to scent anything, due to Sanarie’s condition, almost no one in the world deserved this, let alone this girl, who after 500 years of cruelty, entrapment and torture, still had the capacity for loyalty and love.  
Azriel exhaled, angered by what he was learning, but they had to keep moving. He gently cradled Sanarie until she lay on the ground out of Korazsa’s reach “We have to go, we’ve lingered too long. Help me re-seal this and suspend it so they don’t know she’s gone until morning” Azriel said.  
“Good idea” Korazsa said, together they sealed the womb shut, bound it with the chains and Korazsa relocked them in place. Within a few minutes, the iron womb was suspended as if it’d never been touched.  
“I’m sorry” Sanarie said, she’d come to and was pushing herself up from the ground.  
“Slowly, and you have nothing to be sorry for” Korazsa said, as she lunged for her, to help her stand.  
“Mmm” Sanarie mumbled through the pain as she stood up, what she needed was to lie down, and take all the weight off her back.  
“We have to go’ Azriel put one arm around Korazsa and said to Sanarie ‘I’m sorry, this may hurt” as he wrapped his other arm around her, as he suspected she cried out in pain, he watched as Korazsa reached over and put her hand on Sanarie, Azriel felt the healing magic pass him and scented it in the air, the smell of salty sea air and warm leather, became stronger, he still could not however scent Sanarie, which did not surprise him. Azriel spread his wings and flew, bringing his shield with them, hoping that his shadows moving through the mountain could be mistaken for whatever darkness was lurking in the Hewn City, that unnatural darkness, foreign, even to him.  
“Where is it safe to leave you?” he asked Korazsa, as he flew in the cavernous darkness, he could not take her, the more people went missing, the more questions would be asked, and the more likely Keir’s sights would be set on Velaris and the true Night Court as the culprits.  
“There” she pointed to a space in the rock, which revealed a staircase beyond.  
Azriel flew close and then winnowed the three of them to a landing, a little further back into the rock, which was dark enough to deposit Korazsa and leave.  
Azriel let go of Korazsa and said to her “make sure you’re seen, by many people, so her disappearance cannot be pinned on you” he scooped up Sanarie, to take the pressure off her back and hopefully alleviate some pain. She leant into his neck and shoulders, letting him take her weight, he turned his head to whisper words of comfort in her ear, before he took her from everything she’d ever known, however awful, it was in some way home, and then he winnowed.  
Sanarie didn’t see it, but as she disappeared in the arms of Azriel, Shadowsinger, Korazsa smiled.


	7. Chapter 7

As soon as Azriel manifested in the air high above the city of Velaris, which the House of Wind over looked, he saw Morrigan, not sweet, playful, cheeky Mor, Morrigan, face like thunder, pacing in an agitated manner. She stopped when Rhysand, one arm around Feyre, pointed to Azriel in the sky with the other, she spotted him, cradling a bundle of old earthy coloured rags. She stood arms crossed across her chest, waiting for him, to face the Morrigan.  
As he landed on the balcony he tilted his head down to Sanarie's ear not taking his eyes from Mor's enraged face, which had slightly softened as she beheld the state her sister was in. Azriel said very softly in his deep voice "Sanarie, this is your family; your cousin High Lord Rhysand, High Lady Feyre & someone I'm sure you will come to know as a dear friend, and your sister, Morrigan".  
Sanarie lifted her head, which had been tucked to her chest, and still leaning on his shoulder and collarbone she looked into Azriel's face, he sucked in a breath, he hadn't been able to see her face in the darkness of the Hewn City, but now, he saw her properly for the first time. For a long while Azriel couldn't take his eyes from Sanarie, finally after moments had passed, he tore his gaze away from her, to look from Sanarie to Morrigan and back again, to check that he wasn't imagining things. He tried to remember how to breathe. Sanarie had bright blue-green eyes and hair somewhere between dark honey blonde and light brown. She still lent on him, and crossed her brows a little, looking up at him confused curiosity washed over her face, as she surveyed him, the feeling that he never wanted to let her go gripped him, unconsciously the scarred thumb on the hand which was cupped around her back supporting her against him, gently rubbed back and forth in a soothing motion. He pulled her tighter to him, gently, but firm, he would not allow her to be taken from him, not yet.  
Sanarie looked towards Mor still resting exhausted and pained in Azriel's arms, and smiled as she said "You sent him to get me?"  
Mor couldn't reply just then, as she saw her sisters face, she knew why her father had kept her so well hidden, if anyone of the Inner Circle, or anyone close to them had seen that face, they'd have known immediately she was Keir's daughter, because she had Morrigan's face.  
"Bloody Mother, this explains a lot" Mor said, eyes popped open, brows raised, seeing herself mirrored in her sisters face. And witnessing the exchange between Azriel and Sanarie, it wasn't the mating bond snapping into place, but it was something, and likely it was only a matter of time before the bond did snap into place.  
Rhysand exhaled, looked at Feyre and asked rhetorically down the mating bond, as she asked the same thing down that bridge between them "mates?" they nodded at each other in agreement, it wasn't official, Azriel's scent wasn't wrapped around her, but he'd never reacted like that to any female, not even Mor. He wouldn't look away from her for more than a miniscule moment, he visibly soothed her with his thumb and pulled her close to his chest, they were bewildered by the display before them.  
"She needs attending" Azriel said, face like stone as he realized he'd soon have to give her up for someone else to care for.  
Mor had stilled, as she really took in Sanarie, the scratchy cloth she wore, patched and dirty, filthy really, the bloody bindings around her head, Mother only knew what injury lay beneath there. She burst into tears and said "Oh, Sanarie, I'm so sorry, I never knew about you, I would have gotten you out of there if I'd known, I'm so, so sorry".  
Sanarie teared up at witnessing Mor's distress and reached out to her, she took Mor's hand and said "It's okay, I was not your responsibility, I was Keir's, as were you and from what I heard growing up in the Hewn City, he was no better to you, than he has been to me".  
"Can you walk?" Mor asked.  
"It will hurt a little, but I can" Sanarie said.  
"That's a lie, it will hurt a lot, after what I witnessed retrieving you" Azriel said.  
Mor looked from Azriel to her and said "You know; other than Azriel seeing the truth with his own eyes, truth is my greatest power, so you can't lie to me either. You're going to have to let us look after you"  
Sanarie looked down and said "but I'm so disgusting; I wish no one would touch me, for their own sake"  
Those words were a knife to Azriel's heart, he didn't care what state she was in, he'd bathe her himself if it wouldn't make her uncomfortable, which he was certain it would.  
"I'm your big sister, I will carry you, and then I will bathe you, and I won't hear any more talk like that about my little sister, do you understand me?" Mor said, having absolutely none of it, experiencing sisterly protective nature for the first time in her life. Yes, Rhysand was family, the whole inner circle was family, but this felt different, this person, half her blood, her younger sibling, needed her, needed her care and protection. It wasn't just a sense of obligation; it was something else, soul deep and inexplicable.  
Mor reached out and put her arms under Sanarie and tried to pull her away from Azriel, which was met with a vicious animalistic snarl and darkness exploding out around Sanarie and himself, Mor jumped back. She had startled him; he was still looking at Sanarie, unable to look away, when Mor had tried to take her from him.  
Mor backed off a few more steps, and took a few sharp breaths to help quell her shock and anxiety, at the show from Azriel which always made her uneasy, Feyre reached out and put a hand on Mor's arm to comfort her and pull her back towards her. Feyre knew if things got out of hand it would be her that could reign in Azriel, if Rhysand got too close being a male, after seeing that reaction from Az towards Mor, it would be Feyre as High Lady to command him back to calm.  
"Az, it's just Morrigan" Rhysand said, in a warning tone, trying to remind Azriel, they were all friends here, not foes.  
Sanarie had looked to Azriel when he'd snarled and thrown shadows around them, but she didn't look afraid, she just watched him and Mor, following her instincts she put her hand on his shoulder to steady her, pulled herself up and kissed his cheek.  
Azriel looked down at her, and after his breath caught in his throat at her lips touching his cheek, his breathing started to slow.  
"It's okay, she's my sister, she won't hurt me and you know that" Sanarie said gently, then reached out her hand between herself and Mor and waved it back and forth in Azriel’s shadows, parting them and reaching a hand out to Mor.  
Mor, Rhys and Feyre all stood staring at Sanarie and Azriel "has anyone ever parted Azriel’s shadows like that?" Feyre asked.  
"No" Mor said.  
"Never" Rhysand said.  
“You could part them too, if I let you” Azriel said, still looking at Sanarie, whilst he addressed the astonishment of his family. Dark wisps of shadow still curled around Sanarie and himself, but closer now, tight to their bodies rather than a barrier between themselves and Mor.  
Mor must have felt reassured enough by Sanarie’s display with Azriel and his shadows that she stepped forward and held her sisters outstretched hand.  
"Korazsa? Is she here?" Sanarie asked. She'd been so overwhelmed by everything which happened so quickly, and distracted by that feeling she'd never felt before, when she'd looked at a male, that she had forgotten to see if Korazsa was okay.  
"She's still under the mountain" Azriel said.  
Sanarie turned to him fear and worry lining her face and said "You cannot leave her there!"  
"They would start looking for you. If you were to disappear together, they'll assume you escaped, if we take you alone, we may be lucky, and they'll assume other forces are at play. We can go back for your friend in a few weeks" Azriel said, sorry that he couldn't give her what she wanted.  
Sanarie started crying, she could leave it all behind, but not Korazsa "Please I'm begging you, I'll never ask for anything ever again, we can work for lodgings and food, we won't be any trouble, I promise"  
"That's not why I said no, and you won't ever have to work again if you don't want too" Azriel said, saddened by the realization, that Sanarie didn't know the kind of freedom she'd been taken to.  
"Please' she wailed 'he might kill her, she was my only family for almost 500 years please, he knows what she means to me, he may kill her out of spite"  
"Rhysand?" Mor asked, her cousin and High Lord, in one word for the mercy her sister begged for on behalf of her only family up until this point.  
Rhysand nodded and said "Go back for her friend Azriel, if you think you can manage it tonight and you think it's safe"  
Azriel looked down at Sanarie and held her close to him again; he was breathing in short shallow breaths as he prepared himself for what he had to say. Azriel knew he could not bear to hand her to another male so he said to Mor "I'm sorry for before, you take her"  
Before Mor could take her, Sanarie looked back at Azriel and said worriedly "You'll come back, with Korazsa, you won't get caught? You will come back won’t you?" concern for her friend, and for him, it swelled his heart, whatever it was he felt for her, she felt it too.  
"I will always come back" Azriel said, he smiled at her as he handed her to Mor, which felt like he was voluntarily ripping half his heart from his chest and giving it away.  
Mor gently took her sister in her arms and said "Azriel, I'm going to take her away now, to her room, the east room, one floor down, the one overlooking the park, I'm going to bathe her, feed her and send for Madja to heal her, she will be here when you get back, and she will be well" she finished, hoping that in preparing him, he would not lose it when she turned her back and walked away with Sanarie.  
Azriel nodded and took a few steps back, as if creating that space would hold him back from going after her.  
Mor turned and walked into the House of Wind, leaving Azriel to his new rescue mission. She went east, down the stairs to the level below and took her sister straight to the bathing room, which was attached to the bedroom Mor had chosen for her.  
The room had been prepared with scented oils, soaps and a hot bathing pool. This had Rhysand written all over it, he'd seen Sanarie's state when she arrived and listened to Mor’s parting words for Azriel, then used some magic to have this waiting for them.  
Mor lay Sanarie down on a bench by a wall and asked the attendants who were waiting nearby "Please fetch two dark chemises and leave them by the door, I will attend my sister alone, thank you" they nodded and left her. Mor was trying to think of how to bathe her sister, whilst giving her the most dignity and modesty she could. Sanarie had suffered enough and if she could manage it in any way, Mor would not add to her humiliation or suffering.  
Sanarie was visibly exhausted and in pain, Mor wanted to get her into the hot water as soon as she could, and hoped that would be some small comfort until Madja arrived, she was sure Rhysand would have sent for her already, after what Mor had said before walking away.  
"I'm going to take your clothes off, but I won't look I promise, and then I'll put a dark chemise on you and myself too, we'll go in together and I'll help support you while you wash" Mor said, she wouldn't do anything before asking her, she didn't want to scare her or shame her.  
“No please, I’ll putrefy the water, you don’t understand, I haven’t been let out of what is basically a coffin for 5 days, only to eat bread and drink water, you understand?” Sanarie said.  
Mor didn’t know what to say, it was even worse than she’d thought, by the looks of Sanarie and the smell, she’d thought maybe excreta had been thrown at her in a public punishment, but that was not the case at all. Mor thought quickly about how to cleanse her sister, without making her feel like she was soiling anything.  
“I have an idea, wait here, I’ll be right back I promise” Mor said.  
Mor left the room and went to find Rhysand; he was sitting with Feyre in the dining hall drinking what looked like straight whisky.  
“She doesn’t want to putrefy the water, it’s a long story, and I don’t want to humiliate her by telling it, as it’s not mine to tell. I need to take her to that tidal pool, just near the Sidra mouth, the sea will cleanse the water once she’s done washing, then I can bring her back here to soak in the hot water to help with the pain” Mor explained to Rhysand quickly.  
“What do you need?” Rhysand asked.  
“Can you make sure there’s no one down there, so we have privacy? And maybe just a few Fae lights if it’s too dark” Mor asked.  
“Consider it done” Rhysand said.  
“I’ll come with you Rhys, Mor is there anything you want us to leave by the pool?” Feyre asked.  
“Yes, actually” Mor said, she waved her hand and the supplies from the bathing room appeared on the table; towels, robes, oils and soap.  
“Leave it to us” Feyre said, squeezing Mor’s hand.  
“Once it’s prepared, we will return and take you both straight there” Rhysand said  
“Thank you” Mor said, as she returned to her sister.  
Mor walked to her sister, put a hand on her as she knelt by her side and said “Rhys and Feyre are going to prepare a tidal pool for you to bathe in; it’ll be ready for you soon. You’ll be able to wash and don’t worry about putrefying the water, because the sea will wash it away at high tide” Mor said.  
“We’re going to see the sea?” Sanarie asked.  
“It will be too dark to really see anything, but you'll be in sea water, and you'll smell the seaside and hear the waves crashing, but as soon as you're ready I'll bring you back and we'll spend a whole day exploring and enjoying the beach” Mor said, becoming increasingly aware of her sisters, small life up until this point.  
"That sounds wonderful, both the tidal pool and seeing the beach one day" Sanarie said, tears rolling silently down her cheeks, Mor wondered if it was from worry over Korazsa not being safely with her, or the pain in her back, but perhaps it was Mor's kindness, gentleness and caring which did it, as these things often do, when you become numb to cruelty and hate; kindness and love are the only things, which can break you.  
“Can I get anything for you while we wait?” Mor asked.  
“Actually, I’d love to brush my teeth and drink a vat of fresh water” Sanarie said, tears still staining her cheeks, yet she was still able to smile through it as she spoke to Mor. Showing again the positive nature and enduring spirit, which resided within her. Perhaps Sanarie's nature was a tie they shared as sisters, or a credit to her mother’s line, whoever her people were, or her friend Korazsa. Mor suspected all had a part to play, and felt Sanarie was blessed to be a female, with enough good women who raised her, or shared her blood, that she grew into this brave, kind, positive female.  
Mor waved her hand and a boar bristle tooth brush appeared by the sink, along with a large jug and glass filled with water, on a bench by the wall.  
Sanarie sat up slowly, with a little help from Mor and hobbled, crouched over to the sink and began to wash her hands. Once she had been standing and the extent of her disability was apparent, Mor hadn’t been able to move, her sister walked hunched, like an old woman.  
Sanarie had brushed her teeth at least five times, Mor wasn’t really focused on that, she was too conscious of her sisters state and the hurt it put in her heart, to really pay attention.  
“It’s not as bad as it looks, I’m used to the pain mostly and I’ve adjusted to moving around as I’ve been this way my entire life. I know no other existence so that’s a blessing in itself, I don’t think you can really miss something which you’ve never known” Sanarie said, noticing Mor looking at her with sadness on her face.  
“I’m sorry, it’s very rude of me to stare” More said, suddenly ashamed of herself. Az had warned them that she was crippled, but Mor hadn’t expected it to be this bad. By rights Sanarie should be in the prime of her life and not held back by any disability.  
“Don’t be sorry, it must be a shock to see your younger sister looking more like an ancient with such poor posture' Sanarie smiled, as she walked to the water and cup, not bothered by Mor at all 'It’s okay, really it is, I’m used to the staring, usually people look at me in disgust or mockingly. All I saw in your eyes was the concern and sadness of a sister, who actually cares about her family members, however estranged”  
Mor smiled back at her sister and lent down to hug her, amazed at her sister’s astuteness “Could I take the bindings off your head and perhaps your outer dress? When Rhys comes back he’ll fly us out of the house of wind and then winnow us to the pool, and you can get in and take off your under dress” Mor asked.  
“Why can’t you take me” Sanarie asked.  
“No one can winnow into or out of the house of wind not even Rhysand, its 10,000 steps to the city below, but it’s very safe here and quiet, it’s a good place for you to convalesce. You’re by no means a prisoner, just let me know if and when you want to get out the house to see the city and I’ll organize it” Mor said.  
“Better to leave my dress on, if I’ll have to be carried again, I think most of the mess is contained in by cotton under clothes. It feels wrong having the High Lord carry a subject in this state” Sanarie said, shame creeping back in.  
“You’re his cousin, and aside from that fact, the priestesses in the library beneath this mountain, have all been in either my care or his, some in far worse condition than you are, so don’t think for a second that he is judging you, he is judging our father for doing this to you. Do you understand? I am not ashamed of you and nor is anyone else, current state or no” Mor said, hoping sharing some of their history would help Sanarie to not be ashamed, because no one else was.  
There was a knock at the door; Mor opened it to see Rhysand and Cassian. Rhysand said “We’re ready for you, I’ve drafted Cassian to fly you out Mor, Cassian has left Madja with Feyre in the house library, but don’t feel rushed, they have things to discuss in the meantime”  
Mor looked at Cassian and enunciated quietly “Be-have” such malevolence in her eyes as a threat if he didn’t.  
“Always, besides Rhys already threatened me” Cassian said.  
“Good, little brothers generally need a shoe in the ass from time to time” Mor said.  
"Next time I'll be sure you get the honours" Cassian said.  
"I'll enjoy that, not that I need the invitation" Mor said.  
Rhys shook his head at the two of them amusedly.  
“Sanarie can I come in there and pick you up?” Rhysand asked.  
“Yes, that’s okay” Sanarie said.  
Rhysand walked into the room and observed Sanarie was bracing herself on the wall draining the last of the water from her glass, she placed it on the tray and stood up, then walked crouched towards him, Mor watched as he stilled, sadness was there on his face as his throat bobbed, only for a moment and then he pushed the emotion aside and moved to help her.  
“Let me pick you up” Rhysand said, and stepped forward and scooped her up.  
Cassian opened his arms to Mor and cocked his head to the side, gesturing to Rhys and Sanarie "Want a lift?" Cassian said.  
"When we get to the balcony" Mor said, as she reached up and put her hand over his face pushing him away playfully.  
Sanarie breathed a chuckle watching the exchange.   
"You'll get used to us all, although everyone is on strict instructions, to ease you into the banter. Get Amren or Nesta on a feisty day and you'll beg us to lodge you on the other side of the city" Rhysand said.  
"I'm sure on their most trying day, they'll be perfectly delightful to me, if they're anything like the rest of you" Sanarie said, thinking if what she'd seen so far was any indication, they were all a good kind of people.  
"Aw, Cauldron Bless Her, she thinks Amren and Nesta will be delightful. Don't worry Ana I'll pester them and they'll leave you well alone" Cassian joked.  
"Ana, Korazsa calls me that sometimes" Sanarie said.  
"I could call you Arie instead?" Cassian said.  
"I don't mind, call me whatever you like" Sanarie said.  
"Okay, Sana, Narie, San" Cassian said.  
"Is he always like this?" Sanarie asked Rhysand.  
"Oh no, not at all, he's usually much worse; making very inappropriate jokes, this is tame Cassian. I told him if he didn't have disgustingly good behaviour, I'd order him to go and find Bryaxis, and put him back in the bottom of the library. See how pale he went at the mention of Bryaxis' name? You'll be a good bat won't you Cassian?" Rhys said.  
Cassian scowled a little, scooped up Mor and launched into the sky, and shortly after, they winnowed.  
"Our turn, you ready?" Rhysand asked, preparing her.  
"I'm ready, thank you" Sanarie said.  
Rhysand wasted no time, launching them into the air and as soon as they cleared the wards, he winnowed them to the tidal pool.

 

The pool, carved out of rock, was already being lapped gently by the western sea and its rising tide; they'd arrived just in time to take advantage of the pool before the tide swallowed it up.  
Mor went straight to Rhysand as soon as he'd appeared and said "Put her down on that day bed, it'll be comfortable Sanarie, and then I'll shoo these males out of here"  
Rhysand put her down gently and said "I'll check on Mor and come get you both when she says you're ready, take all the time you need"  
"Thank you" Sanarie said.  
Rhysand nodded to Sanarie, and then took Cassian's hand, and they were gone.  
"Can I help you take off your outer dress?" Mor asked, as soon as the males had left.  
“Of course, I trust you” Sanarie said.  
“Why? You hardly know me?” Mor said.  
“You’re not like Keir, you never have been; dangerous in your own right, but not cruel” Sanarie observed.  
“Perhaps you have some truth-seeing in you as well” Mor observed amusedly.  
Mor carefully undressed her sister, starting with the bloody bindings around her head, she'd clearly gotten a head wound days ago, which had bled pretty badly. As the bindings came away, it took everything she had not to cry, a set of seven notches lined her ear on the right, the seventh clearly the newest, and then she saw the nine on her left ear. Their father had butchered Sanarie's Fae ears, a sign of the magic she should have had, but was barren of; her father’s idea of poetic punishment Mor supposed. She waved her hand, sending the dress and bloodied linens into a basket back at the house of wind. She mustered herself as the emotion started getting the better of her, she sucked that sadness and pity back into her, blinked the tears away. She felt she had no right to cry, not when Sanarie had suffered so badly.  
Once her outer dress was off Sanarie wasted no time getting into the tidal pool, Mor supported her until she was sitting on a ledge submerged in the water, able to cling to the pool edge if need be.  
Sanarie whimpered as she was swallowed by the water “Oh, it’s so warm. Oofff, I needed this” Sanarie said.  
“I’m so glad to hear that, and I’m so glad it’s still warm, I had hoped it would be” Mor said.  
Sanarie disrobed in the water, the dim fae light, just enough to make out their surroundings, and low enough to give Sanarie her dignity.  
“What should I do with this?” Sanarie asked, holding her dirty chemise out of the water.  
“Easy fix” Mor said, she just waved her hand and sent the under clothes to the basket back in the House of Wind, which held her outer soiled clothes and bloody rags. She would keep Sanarie’s old clothes, it wasn’t her right to throw them away, and she felt maybe one day, Sanarie would want to burn them herself, for closures sake. Mor felt a little guilty for the house staff, but she’d tell Rhysand to give them a bonus this week for the trouble and she’d go and give the staff a thank you in person. It was always good to look after those, whom looked after you.  
“Would you like some soap?” Mor asked.  
“Yes please” Sanarie said.  
Mor handed her the soap and inquired “how is the water?”  
“Surprisingly warm, is sea water in summer always this warm?” Sanarie asked.  
“Sometimes, I think it’s probably that the stone holds the heat of the day, warming the water in the pool” Mor said.  
Sanarie nodded in understanding and agreement.  
“This smells of honey” Sanarie said of the soap.  
“I gave you Honey, Aloe, Oatmeal soap, gentle but cleansing” Mor explained.  
“It’s lovely, at home I just used the soap leaves Korazsa picked from the mountain side, they work well, just don’t smell like much, except maybe wet grass, which isn’t unpleasant at all. But honey is a lovely luxury” Sanarie said.  
“I’m glad you like it” Mor said, feeling a pang at Sanarie's notion of luxury being a bar of soap. Mor would absolutely teach her a thing or two about luxury, but for now, she'd get some more dresses, some more humble styles, she felt what she'd procured for Sanarie's wardrobe already, would be too much for her, for now anyway.  
As Mor sat by the pool on a stump of carved stone, she felt a wave of magic pass by them, Sanarie felt it too because she said “did you feel that?”  
“Yes, I wonder what that was about” Mor wondered out loud.  
“I might be imagining it, but I think the water just got warmer and cleaner” Sanarie said, sounding surprised.  
Mor smiled and said in grateful realization “Rhysand. We’re lucky to have him”  
“So tidal pools and the sea are not usually this warm” Sanarie noted.  
“Can I come feel the water?” Mor asked.  
“Of course” Sanarie said.  
Mor laughed as she felt the hot water and said “definitely Rhysand. I’ve felt the water this warm in here on very hot summer days, but not this warm after night fall”  
“I’ll be sure to thank him later, that’s very thoughtful and kind, to use his magic that way” Sanarie said sounding grateful, as another wave of magic passed by them.  
“There’s something for washing hair if you’d like?” Mor asked.  
“Yes, although I don’t think I have the strength, but I’m clean now and the water is clean, so for now I’ll just wet my hair” Sanarie said.  
“No you won’t, you want clean hair and you will have it” Mor said, as she plucked up the two black chemises. Being a female with long hair, she also knew how refreshing clean hair could be, and refreshing was just what her sister needed.  
“Here” Mor said, and handed one to Sanarie.  
“You’re getting in to help me aren’t you?” Sanarie asked.  
“Yes, I had thought I may need to help you, and you’ve done brilliantly on your own, but you’re growing more exhausted in the water by the minute, and I think what you’ll need soon is a warm soft bed to sleep in, but you definitely need food before that. So I’m helping you and I’ll hear no arguments so don’t even try” Mor said.  
“I won’t argue, I can’t be bothered just now” Sanarie said, she’d already pulled the chemise on and was leaning her head on her arm, which rested on the edge of the pool.  
“I’ll be right back” Mor said.  
In no time Mor had changed and was getting into the pool with her sister, she tentatively moved her sister in the water, supporting her back with one hand and washing & rinsing her hair with the other. Just after she’d finished and had wrung out her long hair, a wave of magic passed them again, cleaning and heating the water, Rhysand had the timing of a saint.  
“I can wash it again if you’d like?” Mor offered, remembering how she’d brushed her teeth multiple times, and wondering if her sister felt like her hair needed the same attention.  
“No, you did such a thorough job of it, once was plenty” Sanarie said.  
“Are you ready to get out? You’re sounding quite tired” Mor said.  
“I am ready, but not sure I’m able, and to be honest I’m a little afraid to move, because the pain has subsided in the water” Sanarie said, her words making up Mor’s mind to carry her out of the water.  
“I’ve got you” Mor said, as she scooped up her sister from the water and winnowed them both out into the pagoda by the pool.  
Mor set her sister down on a lounge seat in an alcove, so that no wind could cool her before she could get her into a towelling robe.  
Mor manifested the robes into her hand, from where they’d been placed by the pool, and set one down so she could help her sister into hers first.  
“If you’re okay with it, I’ll hold the robe out and look away so you can take off the wet chemise, to get warm and dry in the robe” Mor said moving to stand behind her.  
“Perfect’ Sanarie said, as Mor held the robe open for her, there was a wet slap of the chemise on stone and Sanarie slipped her arms one at a time, into the robe. ‘I thought the water was the only thing keeping the pain at bay, but it still feels better than it was. Thank you for bringing me here, I wouldn't have felt right bathing in that lovely house. I like the way it smells here” Sanarie said of the seaside.  
“I'm glad you like it, and no thanks needed. I have to confess to using some healing magic on you when I got in to help, and I also left some on that soap I gave you” Mor said.  
“It was just what I needed, all of it” Sanarie said, stumbling a little at the end, Mor thought she’d been about to thank her again.  
“Do you like some softening oil in your hair? There’s coconut oil and I can add some Lavender or Rose to it if you like?” Mor asked.  
“Just the coconut would be great” Sanarie said.  
Mor went to work on her sister’s hair, brushing the oil through her hair with her fingers; she hadn’t thought to bring a hair brush, so she’d fix her hair back at the house.  
“I’m going to change, I’ll be right back” Mor said.  
From what Mor had seen in her sister so far, she had hope that Sanarie would truly be her sister, in more than name, it was only a matter of time, and now, that was something they had plenty of. Sanarie was safe, and whilst Mor knew it was likely that she'd have some scars, both visible to the eye and invisible, she knew they could get through it, because her sister, just about her twin, in appearance, was every bit a dreamer born into a court of nightmares, as she was.  
When Mor returned, Sanarie had fallen asleep "Rhys? We're ready, can you hear me?" Mor asked in her mind, hoping Rhys was listening.


	8. Chapter 8

A few moments after Mor thought of being ready, Rhysand and Azriel appeared by the pool.  
Azriel was by Sanarie's side in a moment, he looked at Mor after surveying Sanarie who appeared to be asleep "Did she pass out again or is she sleeping?"  
"I assumed sleeping, she was like this when I got back. When did she pass out?" Mor said.  
"You left her unattended?" Azriel said, his clipped voice the only thing showing his irritation.  
"It was only for a moment, so I could change. When did she pass out" Mor asked again, trying to keep her patience with Azriel.  
"When I got her out of the Iron Womb, the pain, lack of food, dehydration and exhaustion, all compounded and she passed out" Azriel said.  
"Where's her friend, Korazsa?" Mor asked.  
Azriel looked at her and shook his head.  
"No, you left so quickly, what happened?" Mor said.  
"Not now" Azriel said, as he gently scooped her up, Sanarie stirred a little, but didn't wake. Azriel didn't say another word, he just started to winnow Sanarie away, as he winnowed Azriel heard Mor’s shocked protestation at Azriel leaving with her sister.

The first thing Azriel noticed when he held Sanarie was her scent, citrus and frankincense. Beneath the smell of excreta it had been barely discernible, but now her scent perfumed the air, and it was every bit as tantalizing to him as the herself.  
He flew into the bedroom Mor had selected for her sister, the doors on the balcony had made entry easy, he sent some shadows to close and lock them, he wouldn’t risk anything happening to her now, safe in Velaris or not. He looked down at the female in his arms, and realized she really could be Mor’s twin. Sanarie was every bit as small and curvy, hair the same light blonde colour, it had only looked darker before because it was as dirty as the rest of her had been, the biggest difference between the sisters was the eyes, Mor’s brown eyes compared to Sanarie’s bright blue-green ones we quite the contrast, and of course then there was their postures. Azriel wondered, or rather hoped Sanarie's physical weakness in her back would not stop her from carrying a child, Azriel dearly wanted a family, one which was nothing like the one he was raised in, he hoped she would want the same future and want it with him. He was getting ahead of himself, mate or not, she may never be his, that would be her choice, but still, he hoped.  
Azriel walked around the bed, easily pulled back the covers whilst still holding Sanarie to him, then laid her gently on the bed, sprawled amongst soft pillows, he pulled the blankets over her and watched her lying there, before he lent down and brushed his lips against her forehead.  
Azriel remembered the bottle of medicine which he had taken from Korazsa, he untucked it from his pocket and set it on the table by the bed, so that when she was awake it wouldn’t be far from her reach if she needed it.  
Azriel sat by the bed, it took everything he had not to lye next to her and hold her, and more still, not to sit on the bed next to her and hold her hand, he could justify that act. It was just to comfort her and would do no harm. But no, he had to keep his distance, a friendly distance, she was not his mate, not even his friend, she was his acquaintance. It was not certain that she was his mate, and she still had a choice in the matter, if she was his mate, she had every right to refuse him and the mating bond, if it did indeed snap into place.  
Azriel sat back from the bed in an armchair, and began to think about how he would break the news about Korazsa to Sanarie. It had been a hell of a return trip, Korazsa’s screams still echoed in his ears, he knew he would never forget that sound.  
A knock sounded on the balcony doors followed by Mor’s voice “Az it’s Rhys and I, let us in”  
Azriel went and opened the door then walked straight back to his seat by the bed, he could barely take his eyes from Sanarie.  
“Lock it behind you” Azriel said, once Rhysand and Mor were both inside.  
“Oh for the cauldrons sake Azriel, leave it open, she couldn’t be safer and she deserves to enjoy fresh air, after being a prisoner under that mountain for 500 years” Mor said.  
“Lock it, hallway, now” Azriel said, in a fragmented sentence, he needed to tell Mor and Rhysand what he'd witnessed under the mountain on his second visit that night.  
“Fine" Mor said, she marched across the room and into the hallway, Rhys not far behind.  
“It’s not fine” Azriel said.  
"What happened that you’re acting like this? And where is her friend?" Mor asked, in a quiet but firm voice, as soon as she crossed into the hallway.  
Azriel shut the door, turned to Mor and Rhysand and divulged his story “I witnessed what that darkness under the Hewn City can do. It ate her friend, she was there, she was screaming in terror, then she was gone, and I didn't stick around to see if my shadows could stave off whatever that thing was. I do not wish to lie to her, but at the very least we can wait until morning, when she's rested, to tell her" Azriel said.  
"When you say "ate her", what do you mean exactly" Rhysand asked, not liking the way that sounded at all.  
"I killed the 6 Darkbringer guards escorting her to the cells in the dungeon, she was screaming, the darkness came, swallowed her up and the screaming stopped. The darkness was encroaching on the space, I didn’t want to wait and see if it could take me too. I don’t know what it was, and though I sensed its presence before, this was the first time it has showed itself, I sent shadows into it, I do not know what if anything will come of that. I also I don’t know if it can follow me, track my energy now that we’ve had contact. She’s to be locked inside and guarded, for the next 24 hours at least, if it’s going to make a move on her it’ll be immanent. When Keir finds out she’s gone, if he sends that darkness after her, who knows what it could do or what wards it could pass" Azriel said, face holding a dark expression.  
"Bloody mother, I guess I’ll be sequestered in the library until further notice, anyone who wants to help research what that thing is, is welcome to help. You truly have no sense of what it could be" Mor said.  
"I don't know, what I do know is I'm not prepared to take anyone into that mountain to find out" Azriel said.  
"Whatever Keir is up to, he doesn't want us sniffing around" Rhysand said.  
"Which is exactly why we need to" Mor said.  
"You wana be eaten by darkness, because I’m pretty sure I can’t mist darkness to a bloody spritz" Rhysand said.  
"No, obviously not. We need to form a plan, we can't just let this go" Mor said.  
"I have an idea on that. We have an old ally who owes us a favor due to his disobedience" Azriel said.  
"Who?" Rhysand said, in slow apprehension.  
"Bryaxis" Azriel said.  
"Holy Mother Azriel, don't tell Cassian you suggested asking for Bryaxis' help" Rhysand said.  
"I didn't say ask, I said he owes us. Feyre had the good sense to carve out that moon door, like he asked, so she has kept her bargain, he hasn’t. We just have to get him back" Azriel said.  
"And how do you plan on doing that? It's not as if we haven't tried finding him" Mor said.  
"I don't know how we'll get him back, but I think Bryaxis is the only thing that darkness wouldn't dare swallow, so if we're going to go in and figure out what Keir is up to, we need him" Azriel said.  
Rhysand let out a deep sigh, he had always suspected Keir might rebel one day and by all accounts it seemed he finally was. And had the good sense not to go it alone.  
"Well, we don't know for sure that her friend is dead, so perhaps we could just say, she was last seen alive in the mountain, but it's no longer safe to go in and get her" Mor suggested.  
"I don't think half truths is a good way to start off with long lost family" Azriel said.  
"I know, you're right, it's just, she doesn't deserve this loss" Mor said.  
"No, she does not. All we can do is tell her the truth, comfort her if that’s what she needs and then let her be a part of the solution" Azriel said.  
"She could help Mor and I research in the library, help to find out how to summon Bryaxis back, so we can go in and look for her friend. I think stumbling on what that darkness is in a book is a long shot, but finding the means to summon Bryaxis back, that’s a possibility" Rhysand said.  
"IF she can read" Mor said.  
"I hadn't thought of that" Rhysand said, remembering this family who was already so familiar, was in reality a stranger to them.  
"We'll know soon enough" Azriel said.  
"Let's go in, we should be there if she wakes up" Mor said.  
Azriel nodded and quietly opened the door.  
"I'm going to go get Madja and Feyre" Rhysand said.  
"No. She needs rest, take Madja home, she can see to Sanarie tomorrow" Azriel said.  
"She will see her tonight, Madja can work on Sanarie without waking her" Mor said.  
"I said no Mor, she needs rest, I won't risk her being woken" Azriel said.  
"She's my sister, and yes, you may suspect she's your mate, we all suspect that, you’d have to be deaf, and blind to have missed that cue, but that's all it is, suspicion. Unless there's something you have to tell us, which we don't yet know for certain? No? Good. Sister trumps everyone else under this roof" Mor said, marching back into the room taking Azriel's seat, it seemed Azriel’s punishment for stranding Mor atop the house of wind and then making off with her sister from the tidal pool, was to be sidelined and thoroughly schooled.  
"Go get Madja" Mor said to Rhysand, having not taken her eyes from Azriel.  
High Lord or no, in moments like this Rhysand was glad to be dismissed, he turned and left them alone, glaring at each other Mor from her chair and Azriel from the mantel he’d taken up leaning on the bedhead, looking over Sanarie.  
Behind him, he heard their final exchange before they settled into their vigil at Sanarie’s bedside.  
"Fine. But I refuse to leave" Azriel said.  
"Never thought you would" Mor said.  
It was going to be a long few weeks adjustment.

Rhysand returned with Madja and Feyre, they made sure Madja didn't need anything and then excused themselves, Sanarie had enough people to care for her, perhaps too many.  
"Could you just scan her body and mind without any physical exam? We don't wish to wake her" Mor said.  
"Of course" Madja said, moving to stand over Sanarie.  
Azriel stayed by the bedhead and watched Madja closely as she worked on Sanarie.  
“If there is something wrong, I’d like to know right away” Mor said, watching Azriel watch her sister, she thought he was consulting his shadows as they undulated around him and he looked so intensely over Sanarie.  
Madja nodded in response to Mor, then continued her exam, she took her time, hovering over her heart for a good long while, she was frowning when Azriel noticed and asked “What is it, what’s wrong?”  
Madja stood back and said “Mentally and emotionally she’s good, especially considering where she’s come from, I sense no breaks in her mind. Her magic is’ Madja paused, trying to find the right word to describe what she felt and saw ‘suppressed, covered up, I can’t sense how, but it is just beneath a cloud, she will have to access it in her own time”  
“I was told she had no magic, and we have seen none from her” Azriel said.  
“I assure you, it is there, beneath” Madja said.  
“Is there any way we can help her unlock it” Mor asked.  
“I’m not sure, maybe, ask your seer” Madja said, to Mor then Azriel.  
“I will get Elain and Nesta in the morning” Azriel said.  
“I should see her again for a full exam, will you send someone to get me tomorrow evening, around sunset. And just so you’re prepared for tomorrow, there will be no spectators, so find something else to do whilst I attend my patient” Madja said.  
Azriel nodded, his way if acknowledging Madja’s requests.  
“Are you finished for tonight” Mor asked.  
“yes, fly me home Shadowsinger, she'll be fine with her sister” Madja said, clearly noticing the attachment Azriel had in the hesitation he showed in being asked to leave.  
Azriel took one last look at Sanarie and escorted Madja to the balcony, locking it behind him as he left.

Mor sat quietly with Sanarie, watched her breathing and hoped that her dreams were peaceful. She could be her twin in appearance, it made Mor warm inside, to see a family member who so resembled her, who seemed so kind and good, even after all she’d suffered, true family, undoubtedly her blood, she always felt she didn’t have enough family, it was the one thing the wanted more of, except maybe someone to love, her own mate, one day she supposed.  
Sanarie roused from sleep, pushing the covers down “are you too hot” Mor asked, she got up and walked to her sister and put the back of her hand on her sisters flushed cheek.  
“yes, I feel dizzy, could I have some cold water” Sanarie said.  
“Of course” Mor said.  
Mor waved a tray holding a jug of cold water and a glass onto the bed, she poured her sister a drink and helped her drink it down, Mor realized she and sister were still in the robes “I’m not surprised you overheated, you’re still in your robe, would you like a night dress to wear” Mor asked.  
“Yes please, nothing fancy, even just an old shirt will do” Sanarie said.  
Mor frowned at her sister, shook her head and walked to the dresser opposite the bed, she pulled out a soft white cotton nightdress and walked back to hand it to her sister “an old shirt will do, honestly, wait til you see your wardrobe’ Mor said, with a proud grin on her face ‘I’m going to change too, I’ll hear you if you call out, I’m just in the next room”  
“Okay, see you in a little bit” Sanarie said.  
As soon as the door clicked shut behind Mor, Sanarie removed the robe and snatched the medicine bottle from the bedside, the strains of music were only getting worse and the more she resisted humming and singing them, the dizzier she got. She stood by the door, took off the lid, had two big gulps of the stuff and then replaced the lid and put it back on the bedside. She’d removed her robe just in case she got any on herself, Korazsa had told her it was illegal in most places, so she couldn’t afford for her family to smell it on her. Sanarie put on the chemise her sister gave her, went and brushed her teeth, then found a bottle of peppermint oil by the bath and rubbed some of that on her gums, the ashy taste of Korazsa's tonic was completely gone now, she felt sure no one would know what it was she took.  
She still felt sore from being so still for 5 days, and she wondered if the glass doors on her bedroom, lead to a terrace, so she unlocked them and stepped out into the cool night air, she wasn’t surprised to find a large balcony, she walked back and forth a little, then lent her forearms on the stone balustrade and arched her back, to help stretch out the tension there.  
Sanarie looked out over the place her rescuers had bought her to, it was beautiful, and mostly quiet, although far off in the distance she saw some lights glowing in the houses of the city, she could hear the merriment of summer solstice still being enjoyed, singing and music drifted through the city, and every so often a barrage of laughter rippled through the air. She couldn’t wait until Korazsa got here, she knew she would love a place like this. Sanarie closed her eyes to enjoy the cool breeze on her skin, and to better hear the happy city which was now, her home. Sanarie began to hum Nightsong, the hauntingly beautiful melody taught to her by Korazsa washing over her, reminding her of her friend and acting as a prayer, and a wish, for her safe keeping, praying that Korazsa's Illyrian sisters of war, watched over her until Sanarie could see her again. She knew Azriel had failed to get her, otherwise she’d be here, she knew she was alive, Sanarie felt she would know in her bones if she wasn’t. Azriel had seen who Korazsa was, whatever prevented him from getting her had to be out of his hands, because be had to know she wasn’t a danger, had to know what she meant to her and so he who’d have done anything within his power to get her.  
A booming sound overhead roused her from the meditative state, the quiet city and her childhood lullaby had lulled her into, and she looked up to see him, the beautiful, stone-faced one, with the lions eyes, staring right at her intensely. Without warning he dove for her, she yelped out a startled cry and hobbled back, he must have realized he’d scared her because he released his tucked wings so that they stopped him short and landed crouching on the stone ledge of the balcony.  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. How do you know Nightsong” he said, a little breathlessly, looking at her in wonder. Then he reached out a scarred hand towards her, she stepped closer and brushed her finger tips against his, he stepped down from his position, as he moved closer to her he grasped her hand gently in his and just stood there staring at her.  
“Where is Korazsa?” Sanarie asked, watching him watch her.  
“I need to get you inside” he said, ignoring her question, whilst he turned her gently with a hand on her back, guiding her back into her bedroom.  
Mor walked in and saw them, and before Azriel could say anything she said “Yes I left her unattended, it was only for a few minutes and I was right next door”.  
“All it takes is seconds and being out of arms length” Azriel said, looking livid.  
“I’m fine, got swooped by a giant bat, but I survived” Sanarie said, as she turned to Azriel with a smile.  
Mor laughed, hard, then said “she’s funny, she must be my sister”  
“Where is Korazsa” Sanarie asked.  
Mor’s face fell, and Sanarie saw it, the dread and guilt, something more than a failure to rescue her friend had happened, she could see it in her sisters face. The life drained out of her heart and body, she started to slip to the ground, but Azriel was right there, he picked her up and helped her onto the bed.  
“No. Tell me she’s alive, please” Sanarie said, hope still an ember amongst her fear.  
“I don’t know if she’s dead or alive” Azriel said, as gently as he could.  
“Azriel is right, we can’t know for sure either way, and we have a plan to find out, it’ll take some time, but you’re going to help. Your family rescued you, and you will rescue your family, I know Korazsa is your family and so she is now our responsibility too” Mor said.  
“Do you want to know everything” Azriel asked.  
“Yes, please” Sanarie said, tears streaming down her face.  
“Okay, I'll make a deal with you; you eat some nourishing food first, and then I will tell you everything” Azriel said.  
Sanarie nodded.  
“Promise me you’ll eat as much as you can, without making yourself sick” Azriel said.  
“I promise” Sanarie said, still crying.  
Mor waved her hand and a bowl of chicken and bright vegetable stew appeared on a tray, with buttered bread and a spoon.  
“Sit up against the pillows” Mor said.  
Sanarie crawled towards the pillows but fell short, she lay on the bed face buried in the covers and wept, Mor sat in front of her and soothingly stroked her hair. Azriel stood behind her, wanting to bundle her up in his arms and hold her close, but it wasn’t his place, yet.  
After some time Sanarie’s sobs became less frequent and Mor said “Az will help you up okay? You need to eat and then we’ll talk”  
Azriel put his hands under Sanarie to turn her so he could pull her up the bed, as she turned in his arms to face him, he saw tired despair in her eyes without looking away he said “I’m so sorry I couldn’t save her”.  
Sanarie curled into Azriel's arms and buried her face in his neck, Azriel pulled her in, she was looking for comfort, from him, it was all he had wanted moments before, so he gladly comforted her. He just held her, massaging her head in his fingers, which intertwined with her hair. A tear slipped down his neck every so often, and that broke his heart every time, he didn’t move her until he heard her take a deep cleansing breath, then he picked her up and settled her amongst the pillows. He tried to pull away, but she had her arms around his neck, she didn’t want to let go, he looked at Mor, unsure of what to do, he didn’t want to let her go, but she needed food and rest. Mor looked at him and mouthed ‘are you sure' then snapped her fingers, pointed at him, then her sister and raised her hand palm up in question.  
He shook his head and said quietly “not yet”.  
At the sound of his voice Sanarie pulled back and said “‘Not yet’, what?”  
“Nothing, to worry about, I’ll tell you if it happens” Azriel said.  
Sanarie looked at him confused and said “I don’t understand”  
“I will tell you when you need to know, trust me” Azriel said.  
“Okay” Sanarie said, as she wrapped her arms around him again and pulled him in for a hug, Sanarie grazed Azriels wing with her fingers, he stiffened his posture pulling away from her a little with the movement.  
Mor witnessing the moment, stepped in saving Azriel some embarrassment “Where’s my hug” she said in mock outrage.  
Sanarie looked at her, with guilt lining her face and said “I’m sorry Morrigan” she let go of Azriel and reached to hug her sister, Azriel jumped off the bed, wrenched open the door, shut it and locked it behind him, then could be heard launching from the balcony.  
Sanarie turned at the sound of the slamming door, to see Azriel gone, her face fell.  
“Should I not have hugged him? I just, I feel safe with him, he saved me” Sanarie said.  
“You didn’t do anything wrong intentionally, it’s okay to hug Azriel, just try not to touch his wings next time” Mor said, tucking her sister in and moving the dinner tray into her lap.  
“I didn’t mean to offend him, will he come back so I can apologize” Sanarie asked.  
“I wouldn’t say you offended him, it’s hard to explain. He won’t be back until morning I suspect” Mor said, trying desperately to keep the amusement out of her voice and face.  
“I’m sorry” Sanarie said.  
“Have you ever met an Illyrian before” Mor asked.  
“No” Sanarie said.  
“Well then, it’s not your fault now is it, you don’t know their culture or etiquette” Mor said.  
“I suppose not” Sanarie said.  
“Eat some stew” Mor said.  
Sanarie gave her a smile and started eating, she ate ravenously and after her first bite of toast moaned and said “is this buttered”  
“Yes of course” Mor said, pleased her sister was enjoying the food.  
“We hardly ever get butter in the servants hall, and never this many vegetables, and never the good cuts of meat” Sanarie said.  
Mor looked at her sister a half smile on her face, realizing the depths of the poverty she had been subjected to and said “I think you’ve had enough food for now, if you’re not used to eating this way you might get sick if you have too much”  
Sanarie replaced the bowl and lent back into the pillows feeling so full she was sleepy, a memory occurred to her, one she’d all but forgotten in the hours since it had happened, the words of comfort Azriel had whispered to her as he’d taken her to freedom.  
“Morrigan” Sanarie said, reaching out for her hand, which her sister took.  
“Yes Little Twin” Mor said.  
“I like that nickname’ Sanarie smiled at Mor before she continued ‘Thank you for the message you gave Azriel to give to me, I’ll never forget those words” she said, as she squeezed Mor’s hand.  
“I didn’t give him a message to give to you, did he say I did” Mor said sounding confused.  
“Yes, just before he winnowed us away, he said “Your sister Morrigan wanted me to give you a message; this is not your family, I’m taking you home”. I know he meant Keir, not Korazsa, escaping was more than I’d ever thought possible, let alone to hear something so comforting. I’ll treasure those words Morrigan” Sanarie said.  
Mor was crying, Azriel had taken words she’d yelled at him in anger, and turned them into the beautiful memory she’d wanted for her sister, one she’d dreamed up for herself, but never got to live. Azriel had made sure she was there, even when he knew it was not safe enough to bring her.  
Mor moved forward and sat on the bed and hugged her sister “We will get your other sister back, Korazsa is your family too, so she is my family now. Azriel didn’t see her die, he saw her swallowed up by a darkness, he doesn’t know what it is, but we have a plan to go back and get her, it may take time, but we will find her in that mountain. I promise you Little Twin, we will get her back” Mor said.  
“Keir threatened me with that darkness a few times the past few months, I don’t think he meant it though, he enjoyed tormenting me too much so I wasn’t scared, because I didn’t believe him. Anyway, he threatened that he’d summon the darkness and let it take me, he did summon it once to show me what it could do. He killed 6 of his guards and it came, he told it to take this pretty female, she screamed something awful and then it engulfed her and the screams stopped, when the darkness cleared she’d disappeared. A few hours later she reappeared right where she’d been taken from, she didn’t seem harmed, scared, but unharmed, it turned out she was pregnant, so the darkness returned her. I dread to think what that means for Korazsa, I know she is not pregnant, she’d kill a male who tried to touch her against her will and she said she hasn’t been with a male since the first war with Hybern, so I know it’s not impossible”  
Mor nodded that she understood, suspecting that Korazsa was one of the females Keir had taken as a spoil of war, for himself or his Darkbringers, Mor wouldn’t want to be touched by another male if she’d had to live through that fate; attracted to females or not.  
“She is alive, no doubt in my mind. But she won’t be under the mountain, she could be in another world for all we know” Sanarie said.  
“We will not rest until we get her back. We believe Keir is planning a rebellion against Rhysand and Feyre, it’s the only thing which makes sense, making the mountain unsafe for us to enter, he is clearly cutting out himself a slice of territory from which to mount his efforts. We must discover the root of this darkness, whatever Keir has done a deal with, it will most likely betray him as all darkness does, and then it will come for all of Prythian” Mor said.  
“Except Azriel, he is darkness, but he is good and true” Sanarie said.  
“Again, I think there’s some truth seer in you” Mor said.  
“No, I don’t think so, I have no powers. My mother said that was lucky, otherwise Keir might consider selling me, cripple and all” Sanarie said.  
“About that, Velaris' best healer Madja assessed you while you were sleeping earlier, she said you do have power, but it is hidden inside you” Mor said.  
Sanarie looked very surprised.  
Mor laughed “I swear it’s the truth and Madja hasn’t been wrong yet, now try to get some rest. Tomorrow we begin research for how to find or maybe even summon Bryaxis” Mor said.  
“Who’s Bryaxis” Sanarie asked.  
“Bryaxis is more of an It than a Who” Mor said, as she settled herself in a chair by the bed.  
“What are you doing, aren’t you going to sleep in your bed next door” Sanarie said.  
“No, if I leave you and something happens to you, Azriel may metaphorically murder me, and I owe him” Mor said, thinking of the message he had delivered. And also feeling more wary after what Sanarie had said about the darkness, Keir had threatened her with it in the past, Azriel was right, yet again, if it was going to strike at Keirs behest, it would be soon.  
“If you’re staying, get in, you shouldn’t sleep in a chair, this bed is plenty big enough for the two of us” Sanarie said.  
Mor grinned and jumped on the bed with her sister, she got under the covers and waved her hand so that the fae lights dimmed and the curtains closed over the night sky “I forgot to ask, can you read” Mor said.  
“Yes, my mother taught me and after she died Korazsa finished teaching me” Sanarie said.  
“I’m sorry for whatever Korazsa is going through right now, we will make it up to her, Azriel and I” Mor said.  
“Korazsa is a trained warrior, I am worried for her, judging by your face I was terrified she was dead, but now I know in my heart she will be okay, whatever that darkness is she has the training and strength to survive it” Sanarie said.  
“There aren’t really any female warriors, I was one in the first war and a little in the second, but there weren’t any others” Mor said, thinking her sister had to be confused.  
“Keir and his men all but wiped out the free female warband, it was started by Illyrian females, but they accepted all races of females into their ranks. Korazsa was trained by my mother, she became a general, my mother could have been the general, but she preferred teaching new warriors, and she said Korazsa had the calculating mind, better at tactics and the like” Sanarie said.  
“They sound amazing, they fought together; Illyrian females, Fae females and Human females?” Mor asked.  
“Yes, High Fae and Lesser Fae, all females were welcome, and if they did not fight, they served by caring for the warriors and healing them, if they had the gift for healing like Korazsa or wanted to train in that instead of warring” Sanarie said.  
“How do you know all this, I’ve never heard any of these stories” Mor said.  
“I was raised on them, my mother told me them, and then Korazsa after she died” Sanarie said.  
“Are you sure they’re not just stories they made up for you at bedtime” Mor asked.  
“Yes, Korazsa said they weren’t a big enough Warband for big battles and the males would never have let them fight beside them, so they had trackers, who would track Hybern companies and report back, so they could pick them off when they moved into disadvantaged positions, they’d destroy their supplies, take what they needed or leave it at the edge of the male camps. Gorilla warfare, that’s what they did, perhaps Rhysand remembers strange things happening, they said once they slaughtered a company who were transporting freshly forged weaponry, it was their bloodiest battle, but they’d gotten word that the male armies and warbands were always close to running out of weaponry, they won the battle and made sure the weapons reached the males, it cost them their war efforts and their freedom, because when the Darkbringers came upon them mere weeks after that, they didn’t have the warriors to defend themselves. That is the abbreviated version” Sanarie said.  
“I’ll definitely ask Rhysand, it’d be the best kept secret from the war, except you” Mor said.  
Sanarie sighed and said “I don’t think I can talk anymore”  
Mor looked over and saw her sister was talking with her eyes closed “sleep, we have plenty of time for stories”.  
“Good night Morrigan”  
“Good night Little Twin”


	9. Chapter 9

Morrigan woke before Sanarie, she opened her eyes and saw Azriel, asleep in the chair by the bed, he had come back, mother only knew what time, to watch over them. Mor got quietly out of bed and walked over to him, and hugged him awake, probably wasn’t the best idea because he pulled Truthteller on her. As soon as he realized who it was he sheathed it “Never sneak up on me, least of all when I'm sleeping and there’s potential danger lurking” he said, whispering to her.  
“Sorry Az' Mor whispered back, as she continued to hug his neck ‘She told me the message you gave her from me, thank you”  
He patted her arm around his neck and said “Of course”  
Mor pulled back and said “Has the mating bond snapped in yet”  
“Not yet, it will seem like a long time between now and when it does, if you keep asking me that” Azriel said.  
“Fine then, I won’t ask you anymore, but I want to be the first to know when it does” Mor said.  
“I think she should be the first to know don’t you” Azriel said, gazing over Sanarie as she slept deeply.  
“Yes, yes, you’re right. The first after Sanarie then” Mor said.  
Sanarie started to struggle a little in her sleep and moaned “no” to some dreamland tormentor.  
Azriel was by her side in a moment, he brushed her hair behind her left ear and whispered “Sanarie, Sanarie, wake up. You’re safe in Velaris, remember”  
Sanarie’s eyes opened and she pulled away from Azriel’s hand and that’s when he saw her ear slits, the sorrow of seeing her beautiful Fae ears butchered like that drained him and he sat on the bed beside her, staring at the scarred slits in her ears.  
“Don’t touch my ears” Sanarie snapped, fear in her eyes, a remnant of the dream, or the touch of her ear, a lingering trauma Azriel could understand either way.  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you, you seemed to be having a bad dream, I just wanted to wake you. I won’t touch your ears again, I swear” Azriel said, wondering who had given her those wounds, but not wanting to ask in case it traumatized her more.  
“It’s okay, we all have our scars. I’m sorry I touched your wing last night, I guess we’re even now, we’ve both made each other uncomfortable” Sanarie smiled, the fog of sleep dissipating quickly.  
“Yes, I suppose we are” Azriel said, smiling a little at her.  
“Are you going to get Elain and Nesta” Mor said.  
“Yes, you two have breakfast while I’m gone, and make sure she knows what to expect from Nesta” Azriel said, giving Mor a knowing look, he didn’t want Sanarie to be put off balance by Nesta, not when she was doing so well, considering what she’d been through, losing Korazsa and being in an unfamiliar place.  
“Azriel” Sanarie said, calling him back as he’d risen to leave.  
“Yes” he said, sitting back down next to her.  
Sanarie reached up and hugged him “I’m sorry I snapped at you, you didn’t deserve that”.  
Azriel wrapped his arms around her too, subtly breathing her in, he said “It’s okay, I saw the fear in your eyes, none of us expect you to be perfect, we know you have scars and limits, so do we, we’re going to have to learn what those are, for each other”  
“I don’t want my past to control me, or how other people can be with me, Keir can’t hurt me or my ears ever again” Sanarie said  
Azriel added Sanarie’s butchered Fae ears, to his list of things he’d keep in mind if he ever got to punish Keir for what he’d done to his daughters, and no doubt countless other females.  
Then she pulled back from Azriel and took his hand, she closed her eyes as she brushed his fingers over the ridges on her ear, made by each slit, a shiver went down her spine and she cringed, Azriel heard her heart quicken with anxiety, when she breathed and said more to herself than anyone else “you’re safe, it’s not a knife, they’re just the fingers of a friend” she breathed again, steadying her emotions and her heart in turn, then opened her eyes.  
‘the fingers of a friend’ turned over in Azriel’s mind, part of him was disappointed because he wanted more, but part of him was reassured because whilst their bond whatever it was, was still new, she trusted him and thought of him as a friend. He still cupped her face and ear, he was stuck again, unable to move or look away from her, it happened every time she looked at him with those arresting eyes. “How do you know Nightsong” he said, managing to get out one of the many thoughts, which passed his mind as she held him with those eyes.  
“Korazsa taught me, she sang it to me when I was little, after my mother died it was the only thing which could calm me enough to sleep every night” Sanarie said.  
“What’s Nightsong” Mor asked.  
“It’s an Illyrian Lullaby’ Azriel said to Mor ‘how did Korazsa know it, she’s High Fae isn’t she” Azriel said.  
“My little sister knows an Illyrian Lullaby” Mor repeated the information, it amazed her that anything Illyrian could survive in her fathers realm, as he so loathed the Illyrian Fae race.  
“She is High Fae, and she said it was sung to all the younglings in the war camp, my mother taught her as part of her training and someone else taught my mother. It seems like a silly tradition for a female Warband, but a nice one I think” Sanarie said.  
“Well, judging by your humming last night on the terrace, I’d say if you were to actually sing it, it would never be sung better” Azriel said.  
“Except by your own mother, no one can beat their own mothers voice, or cooking, or hugs” Sanarie said.  
Azriel smiled, then said “Indeed”  
Mor stood there arms across her chest shaking her head, it was Cassian and Nesta all over again, and their bond still hadn’t snapped into place yet either. She couldn’t decide what would be more insufferable; Cassian and Nesta’s constant jabs which permeated the room with the heat beneath them, or Azriel and Sanarie's mutual longing for affection and comfort, from each other. Obvious distain versus obvious wanting, she wished both bonds would just snap into place so that they could dismiss the couples to their quarters, when they became insufferable. Because that was Azriel’s hand in Sanarie’s hands and it was still cupped against her face, when their bond did snap into place, there would be no resisting it, that was already obvious. She couldn’t ignore the fact that if there turned out to be no mating bond between them, that they would likely end up together anyway, but she didn’t feel that when she looked at them together, she felt they were destined to be mated.  
“Well, we need to eat and dress, not necessarily in that order, so you need to get going and leave these females to their morning” Mor said.  
Sanarie pulled his hand away from her ear and saw the scarred back of it, she looked up at him sadness on her face “does it hurt” she said, as she ran her fingers along the back gently.  
“Do your ears still hurt” Azriel said.  
“Not anymore” Sanarie said.  
“Neither do mine, they’re old wounds” Azriel said.  
Sanarie bought the back of his hand to her lips and kissed it gently with her plump soft lips “I’m glad” she said, then she finally let him go and laid back in the pillows.  
Azriel tore himself away from Sanarie and left the room, shutting the door quietly behind him, Sanarie watched him go and kept staring at the door after it closed. Mor gave her sister a minute or two before she broke Sanarie’s concentration by stepping in front of her, otherwise she felt they’d get nothing done all day and said “So Little Twin, breakfast in bed, or shall we dress and then go see if Rhysand and Feyre are up in the dining hall for breakfast”  
Sanarie smiled and said “Breakfast with Rhysand and Feyre”  
Korazsa had wanted to get Sanarie out if that mountain for centuries, now she finally was free, and she was safe. She didn’t know if that was the case for Korazsa, but she knew she wouldn’t want her grieving for her, when she finally had a life to live, and it was a life which would lead her back to Korazsa. For her friend, for her sister who basically raised her, she would live, and feel, and enjoy, and send that joy to her, wherever she was, with the thoughts that she and her rescuers, would come to rescue her too; in the hope that Korazsa could sense her, even just in her dreams.  
Mor told Sanarie to search the wardrobe and dresser, to find something she wished to wear, it all belonged to her, Mor had even gotten Sanarie some accessories and jewellery. She wanted her to feel, like she’d have everything she’d need, wanted her to feel at home.  
Sanarie pulled a pair of pants from the dresser “You got me pants, I’ve never worn pants before, well not as the only piece of clothing” she said.  
“Well they’re an option now, I wasn’t sure what you’d like” Mor said.  
“What should I wear” Sanarie asked.  
“There’s very rarely a dress code, if there is one for a special court event, you will be told in advance. Other than that, wear whatever you please, the rest if us do” Mor said.  
“Okay, well now I have so much choice I don’t know what to wear, help” she said.  
“How about, the cropped grey pants and a breezy shirt, it’s summer and I think we’ll need to get the dresses tailored before you can wear them safely” Mor said.  
Sanarie nodded “Pants it is. What about shoes” Sanarie asked, she had lost her old ones somewhere along the way in her escape, which was probably just as well.  
“I’m sure you’ll find something that fits, I bought you a whole lot of outfits, in varying sizes. Wasn’t sure what size you’d need” Mor said.  
“You thought of everything” Sanarie said, a grateful happy smile on her face, she walked to her sister and gave her a hug.  
“I’m going to change, don’t open the doors or go outside, Azriel doesn’t know if it’s safe, with that unknown darkness, and frankly after you said Keir has threatened you with it before, I’m inclined to agree with him” Mor said.  
“I won’t, it’s probably really bright out there anyway” Sanarie said, looking towards the heavy curtains, which blocked out most of the light of the no doubt, bright summer morning outside; judging by the glow around the edges of the curtains.  
Sanarie dressed, and the clothes fit perfectly, a few outfits with multiple sizes of the same things were in the drawers and wardrobe as Mor had promised, Sanarie found everything she needed in her size, including some sandals which were so soft and comfortable they hardly felt real. Sanarie brushed her teeth and washed her face, once she was ready she lay on the bed waiting for Mor to return.  
A knock sounded on her door followed by Mor’s voice “Are you ready for your first day, in Velaris?”  
Sanarie was already at the door before she finished speaking and opened it “I’m ready” she said.  
“You got to the door quickly” Mor said.  
“I slept well, and my back feels okay considering. That bed is really comfortable” Sanarie said, feeling fairly nimble by her standards, her back felt better having had a night in the softest bed she’d ever laid in.  
“I’m very glad to hear that. I bought you some sister presents, can I give them to you” Mor said.  
“You did more than enough already, you got me clothes and shoes and I can’t even pay you back for any of that” Sanarie said, feeling a little guilty.  
“Don’t even go there, I have more money than I could ever spend, and if I want to spend it on my little sister and take her on shopping sprees, I will” Mor said.  
Sanarie smiled and walked to hug her sister in gratitude, as she hugged her she said “It feels strange you know, gaining a sister the same day I lost one, and I know we’ll get Korazsa back, but it still feels like someone punched a hole right through me, like a vital piece of me is missing. I’m scared for her, but I know she wouldn’t want me to waste a moment of freedom, so I’m just trying to keep myself together, for her”   
Mor stroked her thick hair and said “I think that’s very admirable, but don’t be afraid to fall apart either, you can’t bottle it all up and just soldier on, okay”  
“How did you know I’m a bottler” Sanarie said.  
“Truth is my gift, but, failing that, you’re also my sister, akin to a twin in more than looks I’d say. And I’ve been known to keep things to myself on occasion” Mor said.  
Sanarie let go, Mor went and opened a bedside table drawer, she pulled out some wooden boxes, and gestured for Sanarie to sit down in the chair. Mor placed the boxes in her lap and said “These are for you, for every birthday I missed, for every I love you I didn’t get to say and for every time I didn’t get to defend you against our father. I’m so grievously sorry I didn’t save you sooner, please forgive me”  
Tears streamed down Sanarie’s cheeks as soon as her sister had started uttering those sweet words, and she looked at Mor and said “It’s not your fault, he spellbound everyone who knew about me, from speaking a word about my existence, including myself and Korazsa, with me he also permanently glamoured me to look different under the mountain, because I had your face. There was nothing you or anyone else could have done differently to find out about me sooner, I have no idea how Azriel found out about me. I will not forgive you, because you do not have anything to be sorry for. My mother always said “Everything happens when it’s meant, don’t force it or will it to happen differently. Or else you could rob yourself of your own precious fate”. Her fate was far worse than mine, before, during and after I was born, yet she still smiled, she still sang and told me stories, she still had hope and was grateful, she said it was because; without him, she would never have had me, and she would have lost everything she ever treasured about herself, because for me she had to keep living, keep being her so that she did not rob me of a mother. So don’t you dare feel guilty Morrigan, things are happening as they’re meant” Sanarie said.  
“So they can be welcome home presents then” Mor said, lilting up at the end in a question.  
“Every missed birthday, I love you and missed opportunity to defend me is lovely enough, just without the side of guilt” Sanarie said.  
“No guilt” Mor said.  
“Good” Sanarie said, and she opened the lid of the first large, flat, wooden box to find a long necklace of 5 strings of small turquoise beads, Sanarie had never seen anything so beautiful.  
“5 for the 5 centuries missed, and incidentally they’re very similar to the colour of your eyes. I think your mum is right about things happening when they’re meant as I bought these before I met you” Mor said, she stepped forward and lifted them from the box and placed them around Sanarie’s neck. She settled them under the loose collar of her white shirt and Sanarie picked at the beads, rubbing them between her fingers, feeling their cool hard surface.  
“It’s so beautiful, I love it. Thank you Morrigan” Sanarie said, she stood up and wrapped her sister in another hug.  
Mor laughed happily and took the other box from Sanarie, she opened it on the bed and revealed a matching set of bone and inlaid turquoise; hair comb for brushing, a hair brush, a hand mirror and a small hair comb accessory. Mor plucked up the hair brush and pretty comb and gestured to Sanarie’s hair, asking for permission, Sanarie nodded and sat back down in the chair so Mor could brush her hair, which really did need it and now Sanarie understood why there hadn’t been a hair brush for her to use.  
After Mor was done brushing out Sanarie’s wavy hair she parted it on the right, leaving less hair there and a cascade of voluptuous waves on the left, she pulled back the right side of her hair and pushed the comb against it, securing it in place.  
“Beautiful, it really brings out your eyes, have a look” Mor said, she picked up the hand mirror and gave it to Sanarie.  
“I love all of it, and will cherish it always” Sanarie said.  
Mor picked up the wooden boxes and set them on the dresser for Sanarie, then held out her hand “shall we go up for breakfast” Mor said.  
“Yes, I’m ready” Sanarie said, taking Mor's hand and following her from the room.  
It was so much brighter in the hallway, Sanarie had to shield her eyes, “It’s lucky I held your hand, it’s going to take some time to adjust to the light”  
“I’m sorry, the house of wind is very lovely and bright, but not good after so long in a dim city. I hope you’ll be able to enjoy it soon” Mor said.  
“I want too, but my eyes are protesting” Sanarie said.  
“Okay, we’re at the bottom of the stairs, so I’m going to pick you up and carry you” said Mor.  
“Are you sure? I can manage” Sanarie said.  
“Of course, it’s nothing. I carried you down last night, up is no imposition either” Mor said.  
Mor scooped her up and ascended the stairs with ease “We’ll be spending most of our time in the libraries of the city, until we can work out how to summon Bryaxis, and we’ll start in the library with the priestesses, under this mountain, which has a sun and moon door now, so we’ll adjust you slowly to the light down there and then slowly open the curtains in your room. You’ll be enjoying afternoon tea on your balcony before you know it” Mor said.  
Cassian walked out into the hall which abutted the dining room and said in a clipped tone “Did. You. Say. Bryaxis.”   
“Aw, Cassian, what are you doing here” Mor said, gently letting Sanarie down to stand on her own two feet.  
“Having breakfast, Az called us all here, Rhysand went to get Amren, Feyre has Lucien and Az is getting Elain and my beloved” Cassian said.  
Mor rolled her eyes at him, which Sanarie couldn’t see “Can you shut all the curtains, she’s not used to the light, it hurts her eyes” Mor said to Cassian.  
He nodded and turned into the room, Mor led Sanarie into the room after him and put her at the head of the table in an armed chair so she had something to support herself with. Cassian made quick work of the drapes “Ready” he called after he was finished.  
Sanarie removed her hand and upon seeing she was at the head of the table said “Morrigan I can’t sit here, Rhysand or Feyre should sit here”  
“We don’t have any such rules here, this is family, you sit where you like” Feyre said, having flown in and walked into the dining room with Lucien.  
“It really is, shocking, how a like you look” Cassian said, looking from Mor to Sanarie.  
“I like it” Sanarie said.  
“Me too” Mor said.  
“Did you warn her about demon one and two?” Feyre asked.  
“Bloody Mother, I forgot, and she’s about to meet everyone at once, that wasn’t the plan, I thought it would just be you and Rhysand here for breakfast” Mor said.  
Feyre turned to Sanarie and said “Amren is, an old soul, in a young body, she can be testy and impatient, but she’s not bad most of the time”.  
“Now Nesta, that’s demon number two, Feyre and Elain’s big sister, just don’t get on her bad side and you’ll be okay, and don’t get between her and Elain, she may skin you alive” Cassian said, just as Nesta walked through the curtains.  
“You talk about your beloved like that” Sanarie asked, surprised by Cassian’s words, innocently, putting the people puzzle together, all be it completely wrong.  
“Beloved” Nesta said, giving Sanarie a death stare.  
“Cassian what have you been telling her” Feyre said, she had barked laughter so hard she could barely get the words out.  
“Sorry Sanarie, that was a joke, Nesta is not my Beloved, but she wishes she was” Cassian said, giving Nesta a wink, trying to take the heat off of Sanarie, which he had a part in creating.  
Azriel walked through the curtains with Elain on his arm, he looked at Mor and said “Why did you bring her”  
Sanarie wasn’t sure what she could have done wrong, but she looked down just the same.  
“I didn’t know you’d called a meeting, with everyone” Mor said, emphasis on the two last words.  
“Well it’s too late now, she may as well stay” Azriel said.  
“Sanarie is sitting right there you know and you’re making her feel bad, because she doesn’t understand why she’s not supposed to be here, so you better explain” Cassian said, observing Sanarie's head hung down, fingers fiddling with her beads.  
Azriel looked at her then and realized how careless he’d been just now, Elain removed her hands from his arm and lovingly shooed him away in Sanarie’s direction.  
He stood beside her chair and gently lifted her chin “I’m sorry. We’re going to discuss everything over breakfast, I didn’t think you would be ready for all that, or ready for all of us”  
Sanarie looked at his face tears had brimmed in her eyes, that feeling of being unwanted in a strange place had hurt her.  
“Why is it so dark in here” Nesta asked, and pulled open the curtains.  
Sanarie cried out in pain and threw her hand over her eyes, Azriel pulled her into his torso, shielding her “Close those, they’re shut for a reason” he said.  
Nesta closed the curtains and went to sit down by Elain and Lucien, at the other end of the table, Mor had taken a seat to Sanarie's left and Azriel would no doubt take the one by her right.  
“Should I leave” Sanarie asked.  
“No” Mor said.  
“I’m sorry” Sanarie said.  
“You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m going to let you go now” Azriel said, and then gently pulled away, then took the seat beside her.  
Sanarie looked up at him and blinked trying to get the light stuck in her vision out the away.  
“Sanarie’ Feyre's voice called from the other end of the table ‘these are my sisters Nesta and Elain, and Elain’s mate and one of my best friends Lucien”  
“Hello, it’s nice to meet you all” Sanarie said.  
Nesta glared at Sanarie and said “So she has arrived from what is now an enemy territory, barely twelve hours ago, and she’s already welcome at the table. Yes, I’ll grant you she looks like Mor, but that doesn’t make her family or fit to be around us, before she’s been fully tried and tested”.  
Mor stood up rage plain on her face and the room began to shake “She IS my baby sister, she IS my family and you will not speak about her like that. Whatever hardships you think you’ve lived in your quarter of a century Nesta Archeron, they’re NOTHING compared to what she has lived for five centuries, and she is still your better in attitude and decorum, so next time you want to let a demeaning or dismissive word about my sister leave your mouth, don’t. Madja cleared her, just as she saw to your sister when none of us knew if she was a danger to herself, she has seen to my sister and has said she’s not broken emotionally or mentally. Aside from Madja my gift is truth, and I see nothing but good in her. But you would have known these things if you’d asked and listened, instead of judging and assuming”  
Nesta shut her mouth and looked away from Mor, it took everything Mor had not to tell Nesta the condition Sanarie was bought to her in, it would have told Nesta that Sanarie has no loyalty to the Hewn City, but the absolute last thing she would do was humiliate her in front of strangers, just to prove a point. No, it wasn’t necessary, Mor was third in command and if she had to pull up Nesta again she would pull rank on her and end the conversion immediately.  
“Are you okay” Mor said, sitting down and holding Sanarie's hand.  
Sanarie just nodded, head down again, it touched her heart that Mor stood up for her, but she hated to be the reason for an argument, and in some ways what Nesta had said was true.  
The room was silent as Rhysand and Amren walked in, Rhysand went and kissed Feyre and then said to the room at large “Good morning, good morning, good morning, did you miss my dashingly handsome self? Yes? Have no fear, I’ll be here all meal, so feast your eyes” he then flexed his wings to add to his little show and waved his hand so that food appeared from the kitchens. It was obvious Rhysand was trying to diffuse the tension, in just the way Rhysand would, he had likely been listening to the heated exchange before he came in.  
Azriel noticed Sanarie hadn’t recovered from the conflict, and brushed his fingers along hers, as they rested on the arm of her chair supporting her, a tear slipped out of her eye and that was it, he was getting her out of here, she didn’t need to be here for this, be looked at Mor, fierce look on his face and said “You can fill everyone in yes? You know enough?”  
“Likely more than you do after speaking with Sanarie” Mor said.  
“Good, I’m taking her, she doesn’t need to be here for any of this' Azriel said, stood up and pulled out a small leather bound book and shoved it into Mor’s hand ‘there’s everything you need to know about what happened last night in there, read only the last 5 pages of text’ he moved closer to her and asked ‘trust me”  
“Always” she said.  
He looked at Mor and she nodded, they both knew Sanarie was already more attached to him than she was to Mor, they were close sisters already, but the bond with Azriel was different, something more. Azriel was what she needed just now, and Mor could handle the briefing about the darkness, about Keir and the suspected rebellion, their mission to find out what exactly was going on, how they’d achieve it and that they also had Korazsa and her rescue to consider. So Azriel lent down, wrapped Sanarie’s arms around his neck and plucked her out of her chair, as he walked out of the room his shadows surrounded them, dimming the light.


	10. Chapter 10

Azriel carried Sanarie down to the Library, the light would be better down there, but she wouldn’t be cramped in her room, let alone feeling like a prisoner in her quarters, which was the last thing he wanted her to feel after the way he’d found her the night before. So Azriel had bought her to a place which would seem familiar enough to put her at ease, yet different enough to feel safe and more importantly; free. Azriel set Sanarie down on a lounge chair, but upon trying to let her go, could not, because she was still wrapped around his neck and would not let go.   
So instead Azriel sat with her in his lap, rubbing her shoulders, whilst telling her it was okay to let it out.  
After a while Sanarie’s tears slowed and her breathing began to sound tired, her arms let go of his neck and slipped down to his chest, but still she didn’t pull away. Sanarie just rested on him, he could sense a tiredness you only feel after being emotionally spent of tears.  
A female appeared at the top of the stairs and magiced a cart down to the platform he and Sanarie were on. The cart held breakfast foods and drinks; tea pot, coffee pot, orange juice, bacon and eggs, with other fried vegetables, some fruit salad, yoghurt and some hot honeyed oats. There was even a bowl of fresh water with citrus and a towel, for washing and drying their hands before touching any books.  
“Thank you” Azriel said.  
“Morrigan sent it down, said you’d headed this way and would both be needing some breakfast” the female said placing it near Azriel.  
“Thank Morrigan if you see her” Azriel requested.  
“Of course, is there anything else you need?” she asked.  
Azriel thought and then said “A shawl or blanket for her shoulders, I’m sure Morrigan has something like that for her in her room”.  
The female nodded and left them.  
It was quite cool down in the mountain library beneath the House of Wind, and when Sanarie was ready to be let go, without his body heat she would likely get cold.  
Azriel reached down to Sanarie’s face and cupped it, wiping away the remnants of tears with his thumb. He gently pulled it up to see him, hoping it would break the thoughts in her head, which were making her feel overwhelmed “do you like Bacon” he asked her.  
“Bacon, there’s Bacon” Sanarie said, looking and sounding excited, as she sat up slowly.  
Azriel smiled and picked up a piece of it, and handed it to her “there’s always bacon” he said.  
“We never got Bacon in the Hewn City, servants got enough food to get by, but never anything like Bacon. Do your servants get bacon?” she took a bite and sighed with the taste of it.  
“They do, Velaris doesn’t have servants in a sense that The Hewn City does. They’re paid a good wage, treated well, eat as well as we do. We believe if you take care of your people and your staff, they’ll take care of you” Azriel said.  
The smile those words had bought to Sanarie’s face was beautiful, happy and relieved, if Azriel wasn’t mistaken, which he never was.  
“I’m glad, I couldn’t enjoy this Bacon or any of it; the comfort, safety and abundance, if your servants couldn’t enjoy it too. We had to smell the Bacon, had to prepare it for Keir and his High Ranking Families, but almost never got to eat any. Oh, this is so good” Sanarie said, past the food, unable to wait and finish eating or speaking, but doing both at once.  
“I’ll make sure they give you a side of Bacon every morning then, tomorrow I’ll ask them to give you a plate of bacon cooked all differently, so you can sample them and decide how you like your bacon” Azriel said, enjoying watching her enjoy the Bacon. Azriel wondered how the attendant had gotten the food into the library, he was pretty sure tea and water were the only things allowed in the library, and maybe some biscuits. Either Morrigan or Rhysand had made an exception to the rule, just this once.  
“That sounds lovely, thank you’ Sanarie paused her eating, looked at him with a startled expression and started worrying her bottom lip ‘I’m sorry, I wasn’t thinking” Sanarie slid from his lap and sat next to him.  
“If I didn’t want you in my lap, I would have removed you” Azriel said.  
“So you wanted me in your lap” Sanarie said.  
Azriel opened his mouth to speak and then closed it, he wasn’t sure what to say in response, the truth might be too much too soon and lying would undoubtedly hurt her. To distract her from getting an answer to her question, he pulled the trolley around and let her take what she wanted from it.  
“Fruit, yoghurt, orange juice, mmm and definitely more bacon” she said, piling fruit into a bowl, then adding yoghurt and Bacon on top.  
Azriel’s mouth quirked to the side watching her, everything to her was new and exciting; to be enjoyed. The small smile was taken from his face when he remembered why that was, such deprivation, neglect and suffering she’d lived. It put a pain in his heart, because he hadn’t known about her for 500 years and it was his job to know, he should have found her sooner, he told himself he didn’t deserve her, least of all after all this time. The worst of it all, was part of him had always known about her, because for 500+ years he had looked at her sister and longed for her, but never felt like he could touch her, the very idea seemed fundamentally wrong and now he knew it wasn’t just for one reason alone. He’d been both wrong and right about his connection with Morrigan, she bore her sisters face, and her sister was his mate, he was almost certain.  
Sanarie ate happily as the attendant came back with a soft white knitted shawl for Sanarie, she left it on the arm of the chair next to Azriel and whispered in his ear.  
Azriel nodded and said “thank you” and the female left again.  
Azriel got up and walked to Sanarie, he gently put his hand under her bowl and said “Morrigan says for your own good, to let you eat some food of your choice, but if you’re still hungry after a quarter of a normal persons portion to give you the oats, or you’ll make yourself ill”  
Sanarie looked disappointed, but let go of the bowl “a little of the oats then”  
He handed her the honeyed oats and said “I’m sorry, but I promise you’ll have all the food of your choice, for the rest of your life, but let’s not make you sick in the meantime”  
“I know, it’s okay, I don’t want to be sick” Sanarie said, adding a thought to herself ‘least of all in front of you’. He’d seen more than enough of her covered in her own bodily fluids, and Sanarie didn’t want to make it a habit.  
Azriel took his seat again and watched Sanarie eat a few more bites, as he dug into his full breakfast plate of; Bacon, eggs and fried breakfast vegetables. He watched her survey the space she was in, she looked awed and he thought it wouldn’t be long before she wanted a tour and a book or two to read.  
Azriel noticed gooseberries on her skin, he set down his plate and took the shawl over to her, opened it, then wrapped it around her shoulders “It’s yours, from the blanket box in your room at the foot of your bed, there are others in there too”  
Sanarie felt the soft warmth of the wool and said “Thank you. Morrigan took care of everything, she even sent me you”  
“I sent myself, they all wanted to come, but it was too dangerous with that unknown darkness. If I had failed, the full might of the Night Court Inner Circle and Illyrian Army would have been unleashed upon Keir Darkbringer. But I’d hoped that wouldn’t be necessary, fortunately it wasn’t” Azriel said.  
Sanarie looked at him, she seemed lost for words.  
“They all wanted to come for me?” Sanarie said in amazement.  
“More or less, yes” Azriel said.  
“Who was more and who was less?” Sanarie asked.  
“Morrigan was definitely more, I had to strand her at the top of the House of Wind to be sure she couldn’t follow me and put us all in danger” Azriel said.  
“Of course she was, I’m guessing Nesta was less and everyone else was in-between” Sanarie said.  
“Pretty close, well done” Azriel said, a little impressed by her already accurate sense of the people she had met.  
“I know she was right, but is she always like that, always so short?” Sanarie asked.  
“You mean Nesta. Yes she is basically always like that, it’s why I told Morrigan to warn you. And no she wasn’t right, not at all. If Morrigan hadn’t set her straight I would have” Azriel said.  
“She doesn’t know me, and she loves Feyre and Elain, so I’m thinking she’s just looking out for her sisters, like Morrigan is looking out for me” Sanarie said.  
“If it weren’t for the fact I’ve seen how irrational Nesta can be about Elain’s welfare, I might give you that, but I have witnessed it first hand. Nesta and Elain, it’s more like mother and child, she’s not realistic about how much Elain can handle. She’s not as weak as everyone takes her for, just because she’s quiet and kind. In some ways she’s stronger than Nesta; she all but killed the King of Hybern, saved Nesta and Cassian’s lives, but people tend to forget that because Nesta finished the job” Azriel said.  
Sanarie tried to take it all in, she had a lot to learn about these people, in order to understand them, and in Nesta's case, hopefully not get on her bad side, again. Sanarie poured herself some water drank it all down and then said “I’m going to go explore”  
Azriel looked at her and said “Alright, but wash your hands first and don’t go too far, there’s some places in this library that you shouldn’t go unarmed. And I don’t want you out of my sight, I don’t yet know what that darkness in Keir’s lair is capable of”.  
Sanarie went a little white and sat back down, she dipped her hands into the water bowl in the bottom tier of the trolley and washed her hands, then dried them. Sanarie didn’t make a move to leave the little out cropping of rock they were on, she sat and looked at the space around her, she observed the sky window, and the light it cast to the bottom of the library, and the many levels, stairs and countless books, in-between.  
“I didn’t say that to scare you, just warn you, you can go explore this level. And Sanarie, just keep something in mind?” Azriel said, breaking Sanarie’s concentration.  
“Of course, what?” Sanarie said.  
“The library is a kind of a sanctuary for females. Females who have been through horrible life changing experiences, so when you see a priestess; just be quiet and respectful with them, this is their safe haven, it’s our job to protect them and the space they live and work in” Azriel said.  
Sanarie nodded solemnly, she was sorry they had suffered, but happy that they had this safe place. She pulled her shawl closer around her, and ascended the stairs from their little sitting platform. Hunched as she was, she was glad her orders were to stay on the same level, she didn’t fancy the idea of all the stairs she’d seen when she looked over the balustrade. She started to walk along the row of books by the balustrade trying to read the spines, but it was too dark, even for her eyes which were well adjusted to the dark. Fae lights along the row winked into a glow, she pulled her head back and looked along it in both directions, there was no one around, she wondered if the library had a sentient magic about it. She turned around to survey the rest of the library, and she saw Azriel had moved himself to an opposite chair so he could watch her, then she realized, looked at the Fae lights and back to Azriel, he nodded at her in confirmation. Not a sentient library then, just a watchful Shadowsinger using his powers to light her way; Sanarie felt she was a lucky female, because it was the latter.  
As Sanarie came to the end of the row, she saw a priestess deeper into the rows of books, she stood in her pale hooded robes and circlet with blue stones, behind a desk sorting books. She didn’t want to yell at the Priestess or startle her, so she walked a little closer and then said, still at a good few paces away “Excuse me, my lady”  
The priestess looked up and said “I’m no lady’ then she saw Sanarie’s face and said ‘Morrigan? Are you okay?” she added, seeing Morrigan’s face and Sanarie’s injured posture.  
“Oh, no Morrigan is my sister, I’m Sanarie. Who are you?” Sanarie said.  
“I didn’t know Morrigan had a sister. I’m Hyapa, can I help you find something” Hyapa said, surveying Sanarie a little sceptically.  
“It’s nice to meet you Hyapa. Mor didn’t know about me until recently, our father concealed me with some kind of magic for nearly 500 years from everyone, I’m sure you can guess why' Sanarie said, gesturing to her face ‘I’m looking for books about the creature Bryaxis” Sanarie said.  
Hyapa's eyes widened as Sanarie spoke, then she turned and walked away. Sanarie wasn’t sure by her abrupt reaction and departure if she’d be back with books, or at all.  
Azriel came up behind Sanarie and said “Is that true, what you told the priestess Hyapa? Your father concealed you using magic, all this time?” part of him hoped it was true, but he wasn’t sure true or not, if it was absolve him of any guilt he felt for not knowing. He would always likely feel guilt for not stalking Keir himself, until he’d incriminated himself and given Azriel Sanarie’s means of escape, long before now.  
She turned to see him standing between the end of two bookcases, looking dark and dangerous. His big black wings tucked in with his shadows curling around them, he was undoubtedly made for the dark. His sheathed weapons hung around his body, the shadows, plus those bright hazel eyes which currently shone gold brown and made him look like a predatory cat; dangerous was definitely a good word. To Sanarie though, she felt danger for everyone else, not for her. To her he would always mean rescue and safety.  
“Sanarie” Azriel said, trying to call her out of the reverie she seemed to be in, whilst looking at him. Azriel noted her scent, which was winding itself around him, nudging him flirtatiously. The female was torturing him, whether she knew it or not, her heart beat and scent, drove him mad the night before, then she had grazed his wing, now, it was worse.  
Sanarie took a deep peaceful breath, and looked at his lips, his deep voice was so lovely, like early thunder on a warm summers day. Sanarie couldn’t stop staring at his lips, they were round and wide, perfect for kissing and she found she wanted to kiss them.  
“Are you okay” he asked, assessing her with his eyes and the room with his shadows, she seemed to be in a trance, part of him considered that it was something with nefarious intent trying to control her. He was still on edge expecting that darkness to follow him or her. The library was warded, the whole city was, but he didn’t know what that darkness was capable of, and he didn’t like that feeling, at all.  
“I wonder what it would be like to kiss you” Sanarie said, and then coming to herself and realizing she had spoken aloud, clamped her hands over her mouth, flushing pink.  
Azriel clenched his teeth together, the scent coming off her was intoxicating to him, there was curiosity and wanting woven into that scent. It was not any darkness, it was purely Sanarie, did she feel the same connection as he did, even without the mating bond being snapped into place? Every time he looked at her he felt his heart beating out of his chest. Now she was torturing him with her scent, he tensed up and it took everything he had to keep his hands off of her, hell even his eyes, and then she went and said that. He took a few wide steps towards her and managed to stop himself before he grabbed her, he was breathing quickly and forced himself to take those few steps back.  
“I shouldn’t have said that, I just I look at you or I’m with you and I just want to be near you” Sanarie said, feeling breathless after he’d rushed her with that dark intense look on his face, which still held her gaze.  
Azriel couldn’t take his eyes off her, if he didn’t walk away and she kept saying these things, he would kiss her.  
Sanarie stepped towards him, Azriel stepped back “Don’t, I’ll kiss you” he said putting up a hand between them in warning. He meant it, he was losing his grip on his self-control and she kept pushing it further and further away.  
She smiled at him as he’d said he would kiss her, and that smile squeezed his heart and made him lean towards her.  
“Promise?” Sanarie asked, in a playful tone, mischievous ideas sparkled in her eyes.  
That look of all she had said and done in the preceding moments, knocked the breath out of him, along with any will he had left. If it wasn’t for the footsteps drawing nearer, he would have rushed for her, grabbed her and made good on his warning.  
“Bryaxis is mentioned in these’ Hyapa marched back into the wide row of books and dumped a stack of heavy books on the desk there ‘if you’re looking for a book just about that creature, you’ll be waiting a long time” Hyapa said, sniffed the air with a screwed up nose, she looked up at Sanarie, then Azriel, huffed her disapproval, and marched away again.  
Sanarie had looked to Hyapa when she’d noisily reappeared, a little shocked she’d actually come back with books “Thank you’ she called after her and turned back to Azriel, who had a wild look on his face ‘would Mor be angry if you kissed me?” she asked, genuinely hoping the answer would be “no”.  
Azriel couldn’t take it anymore, he closed the few steps remaining between them with a saunter, which left no question as to what he’d do when he got to her. He wrapped his left arm behind her back and pulled her up to him, he felt her feet leave the ground as he happily took her weight, holding her against him. He’d known she wouldn’t be able to stand upright without help, and the way he planned to kiss her, he expected she may not be able to stand at all when he was done anyway. His other hand brushed over her left ear, through her hair and intertwined with it at the back. He kissed her slow and deep, savouring her, to the Cauldron with how long he’d known her, her energy and scent gave back every bit of wanting that his had. After a few minutes and not nearly long enough for his liking be felt Sanarie push against him, she pulled his hair back so he knew for sure she’d had enough “I’m sorry” he breathed on her lips.  
Sanarie panted and gasped for air, trying to take a full breath “I cant breathe, and I'm so dizzy' she said, leaning her forehead on his as she caught her breath ‘don’t be sorry, no one ever kissed me like that, I wasn’t prepared, but it was everything I ever wanted. I think I forgot to breathe” she said, thoughts tumbling out of her as she caught her breath.  
“No one ever kissed you like that?” he asked, incredulous as to how that was possible after 500 years.  
“An old friend kissed me on a dare once, but it was just like” Sanarie pecked him on the lips.  
“What” he frowned at her, he desperately wanted to kiss her again, he couldn’t fathom no one kissing her properly for 500 years. Females should be kissed, especially this female. Azriel realized, even in the dark, there was a light about her, not a visible light, but something else in her energy, a lightness he couldn’t place.  
“No one wants a cripple in the Hewn City” Sanarie said, with a cynical laugh.  
Azriel was speechless, he held her to him, he had grabbed her and kissed her, now he was unable to let her go. “Only once, a only like that?” he pecked her back.  
“Well there was another time, but that wasn’t much better” Sanarie said, trying to shrug off the question and seem nonchalant.  
Azriel’s expression turned savage as he scented fear and pain, as she’d spoken her response “What. Is. His. Name.” he said, in a clipped lilt, demanding her abusers name.  
“Oh, he’s dead now, couldn’t have happened to a nicer male” Sanarie said, sarcastically, again trying to put off the conversation.  
“Did he die slow?” Azriel asked, sounding extremely dangerous.  
If the male hadn’t been dead already, Sanarie had no doubt Azriel would have gone to the Hewn City that very night, stolen him away, and made sure his death was as bloody and satisfying as Azriel deemed worthy.  
“I don’t know, Korazsa found out what he did and threw him from an open stair, if the fall didn’t kill him instantly, then maybe he did die slow” Sanarie said, wishing she could look away and not relive all her past at once.  
Sanarie started to become breathless again, but Azriel realized it wasn’t him which she was breathless over, but the conversation, the memory. “I’m sorry, we’ll drop it”  
Sanarie just nodded and tried to take a full breath to calm herself, some things under the mountain, were better left forgotten. Forgetting had been her only way to keep going, she wasn’t about to start remembering now.  
Azriel pulled her head to his chest gently and held her close, “no one will ever touch you against your will again, not me or anyone. Or Truthteller will draw from them their confession and punishment”  
“Please don’t let go” Sanarie managed to say in a small quiet voice, feeling overwhelmed for the second time that day.  
“Not unless you ask me too” Azriel said, holding her tighter.  
Sanarie reached up and put her arms around his neck again, Azriel lent down and grabbed her under the knees, he took her back to their sunken sitting nook, and sat with her holding her as he had before breakfast.  
“I could sleep here” Sanarie said, yawning and relaxed, comfortable in his arms.  
Azriel unclasped his weapons and hung them over the arm of the chair, so that they were within arms reach. Then he lay down with her on his chest, the wide, plush, red, velvet lounge just big enough to accommodate all of him. He hooked one boot toe under the wide poof in the middle of the platform and pulled it closer, he lay his right wing over it and curled his left wing around himself and Sanarie “Is this okay?” he asked her.  
“Yes, this is what I need, it’s lovely and warm under your wing, I’ll try not to move beneath it” Sanarie said, letting go of his neck, putting her right elbow down by his side and her hand under his left shoulder, tucking herself in and lying on his chest, she let her other arm drape over his right bicep and shoulder.  
“You stay here, as long as you need” Azriel said, taking her left hand in his right and holding the tiny thing it was, he slid his left arm down her back and rubbed it again, a little lower this time, just below where her hunch started. He felt her relaxing into him, knew she’d be asleep in no time, within minutes her body completely let go and he took all her weight, all be it very little. She was too thin, curvy in shape the same as Mor, but still, not enough healthy fat on her; one of the many things about her life he’d see righted.  
Azriel pressed his fingers gently into her back, hoping he could have her back feeling good when she woke, as he moved his fingers up her back, he felt indents in the middle of her back. He went cold inside, he tried to steady his breathing, it couldn’t be the kind of injury he thought, he’d have to see it with his eyes to be certain. Azriel prayed it wasn’t what he suspected, and held her tighter, he would rip anyone apart if they ever tried to hurt her again. The mating bond hadn’t snapped, he lay there wondering if he could force it, find it locked away somewhere, like Madja said her magic was. Azriel sent shadows to her heart as he had done the night before, within seconds they came back and showed him what Madja had explained, and what he’d seen the previous night; a cloud of fine grey ash surrounding her heart, shielding it. He tried again, ‘into her heart, I need to feel her soul, see it, show me’ he thought, sending them in again. Within seconds, they came back, showing him their efforts of trying to push in and failing. Azriel sighed, and tried to think of any other way, he wouldn’t use his shadows on her mind, he wanted to feel her heart, not force her mind or even influence her mind, he wanted the connection, if it was there like he suspected, be wanted that to be real and he wanted her accepting it to be her choice.  
So Azriel lay there and rubbed her back, feeling the weight of her body on his, it felt like home; warm and natural.   
As he lay there thinking of he the previous night, watching her dressed in white, humming the song he’d hoped his future mate would sing to their younglings, he had a stray thought ‘I wish she’d sing Nightsong, so I could hear her voice’, to his astonishment, Sanarie began to sing.  
Azriel lay listening to Sanarie's voice singing Nightsong, he felt some dark empty spaces inside himself start to close. Her voice was high and sweet, the perfect voice for singing babies to sleep, or to calm them when distressed. When she’d finished, and lay quiet and still on his chest, he felt; not whole, but full and content, like the hollow recesses in his heart and soul had indeed closed, had been filled by her song.  
“How about now?” Mor said, in a quiet voice from the top of the stairs.  
Azriel wondered how much she’d witnessed. He shook his head, he knew she was asking about the bond, again. He gestured to an armchair next to him, which she quickly and quietly took.  
“Was she crying when you left?” Mor asked.  
“Yes” Azriel said, in a quiet whisper, Sanarie it seemed was still asleep and had sung upon his unspoken request, whilst still unconscious.  
“Nesta didn’t dare breathe another word, even Elain reprimanded her” Mor said, looking pretty pleased.  
“That I’d like to see” Azriel said, amused by the thought.  
“It wasn’t a big Barney or anything, but she did say it wasn’t nice and the poor thing had been through enough” Mor said, glad the one person who could stand up to Nesta and make it stick, had done the thing.  
“It was long over due. And before you ask again, it hasn’t snapped, but things; happened. I think it will snap, soon” Azriel said.  
Mor’s face glowed with happiness, and she said “things happened, what things”  
“She fell asleep on my chest, after we had delved into a conversation which unsettled her, she needed some more rest after last night and the preceding days anyway. Before that, she said she wanted to kiss me, so I did” Azriel said.  
“You kissed my sister” Mor said, so loudly that Sanarie started awake on Azriel’s chest and pushed herself up.  
Her heart was thundering and anxious fear rippled through the air “What’s wrong” she said, looking worried.  
Azriel soothed her, rubbing his palm up and down her back “nothing is wrong, lye down, you need the rest”   
Sanarie blinked at him, the grogginess of sleep still in her eyes, she looked at Mor then Azriel and flushed. She lay her head down on his chest again, hiding her pink cheeks.  
Mor laughed “If he hadn’t already told me about your kiss, that display would certainly have incriminated you. It seems I can detect truth or untruth and you cannot lie or conceal the truth” Mor said, amused and happy to be getting to know her sister. Happier still to see her and Azriel together, a match which made so much sense. Azriel had always looked at Mor longingly, but he never crossed that line, and she’d never have let him. It felt as though, he knew the face of his mate, but that it was not the right female. Mor couldn’t imagine 500 years of suspecting you’d found your mate but not being sure, now, he was sure. He had known it, they had all known it, from the moment Sanarie had showed her face, they all knew she was Azriel’s mate, and so it seemed did he.  
“The Priestess Hyapa pulled the books she could find, which mention Bryaxis, but there are no books solely about the creature. I doubt anyone has lived long enough to learn about him? Her? It.’ Azriel said, unsure of the pronoun to use for the creature ‘they’re up on the table between the rows, right at the top of the stairs, end of the row, first left” Azriel said, directing her to the books.  
“Speaking of books, here’s your notebook, I left notes from the briefing, so you can read them later. I’ll be right back with the books” Mor said.  
“Thank you Morrigan” Azriel said, and tucked the small leather book into a chest pocket.  
Sanarie looked over her shoulder and watched Mor leave, then picked her head up, looked at Azriel smiling, whilst biting her lip in question, that tantalizing, curious and wanting scent permeating the air again. Azriel reached up and untucked her bottom lip from her teeth, then pulled her face to him holding her lip and chin. He kissed her deeper than before, ignoring the sound of Mor returning with the books. She could watch or she could leave, he didn’t much care which. He was certain he’d found his mate, after she’d heard his thoughts in her sleep and sung for him, and now he would wait for the bond to snap into place. He wondered if it was bound up with her magic, concealed and hidden with it? Had Keir done this to her? And who had crippled her back? Azriel had so many questions, he knew one answer without doubt; every injustice which had been visited upon Sanarie in his absence, would be answered for. Mother help those fools for hurting his mate.  
They broke apart their kiss and Sanarie lay on his shoulder, she hummed one out breath, contentedness plain in the sound. Azriel smiled and held her to him, eyes closed savouring the moment, as he intended to do from now on.  
“Shit. You are mates aren’t you?” Mor said, standing at the top of the stairs, stack of books in arms and mouth slightly open, shaking her head in wonder. She had never, seen Azriel with a female, she knew he’d had lovers over the years, who hadn’t, but he’d never bought one around the family, so she had never before seen this kind of display from him with a female, never thought she would. Mor always thought Azriel had so much self-loathing being bastard born and scarred in just about every way a child could be, that he’d never consider himself worthy enough to have and keep a mate. But the bond, already there for him, just not snapped, had been that thing he needed to let himself open to a female. It made Mor glad. She couldn’t be that person, but her sister was, and that was more than enough.  
“She was asleep, I tried to find the mating bond, I failed at that, but, I’d given up and was just thinking to myself that I wished I could hear her sing Nightsong. And asleep, she sung it, didn’t wake, and I hadn’t spoken a word aloud even if she had been awake” Azriel said, to a speechless Mor.  
“Wow’ Mor managed to say, then walked down the steps put the books on the table, and turned to her sister. Mor rested her hand on Sanarie’s head and continued ‘he’s a good male, he’ll never hurt you like our father did”.  
“I know’ Sanarie said, she opened her eyes and smiled at her sister, then looked to Azriel ‘Did I really sing? And why am I so tired, I don’t understand it, I’m never tired like this”  
“These things happen once you’re not in a survival situation anymore. You might feel a mix of relief with exhaustion for a while, you survived, for so long, now you need rest, so you can right yourself, and so you have the strength to fight for Korazsa” Mor said.  
“That, and you’re malnourished, plus you’ve just been through 5 days of hell, lost your sister until we can get her back, it was a big night last night. And yes you really did sing Nightsong, in your high sweet voice” Azriel said.  
“I did sing, if you can describe it. Can I go back to sleep until lunchtime?” Sanarie asked, still sleepy.  
“Of course you can, I’ll be down here with Rhysand reading these, so you may as well go back to your room and get some proper rest. I’m guessing you’ll be guarding her as a Fae Male does in these situations” Mor said, to Azriel.  
“Yes, I’ll go with her, hold her while she sleeps if that’s what she wants” Azriel replied, only acknowledging her playful snarkiness, by giving her one slightly raised eye brow and a tilt of the head as she’d said “As a Fae Male does in these situations”.  
“Yes please, to all of it, my bed, with you and sleep, just what I need” Sanarie said.  
“That settles it then, I'll see you later little twin” Mor said, settling down in a chair with a huge leather-bound book.  
Azriel sat up holding Sanarie, put one arm under her knees and stood, then made his way out of the library.  
“Am I ever going to walk on my own two feet again” Sanarie asked, levity in her voice.  
“Do you want to, right now I mean” Azriel replied.  
Sanarie sighed and said “not right now, but sometime, whenever there aren’t stairs or slopes”  
“I’ll remember that” Azriel said.  
Sanarie wrapped her arms around his neck, and snuggled in to doze, whilst he carried her back to bed.


	11. Chapter 11

Sanarie had slept most of the day, she and her back had needed the rest, in that huge soft bed.  
Azriel had held her while she slept, she had needed that too, the affection, the tenderness, which Azriel gave her; she found after almost 500 years of going without that kind of attention, from any male, she was starving for it.  
Azriel had sent for Morrigan, still buried in books in the library; a little before sunset. She was Sanarie’s protection while he was gone collecting Madja. Mor had excused herself to the dining room for a pre-dinner drink when he’d returned with the healer, not wanting Sanarie to feel obligated to have her in the room for her consultation, a gesture Sanarie was extremely grateful for.  
Azriel stood in the room, unsure of whether Sanarie would want to be touched in front of Madja, or anyone else, so he awkwardly stood just inside the door as Madja set down her kit bag and surveyed Sanarie and her bent posture.  
Madja noticed Azriel hovering and decided he needed his marching orders “Shadowsinger, wait outside. Don’t give me that look, and don’t stand outside the door, go and wait upstairs where your fae ears can’t pry into my consultation with my patient” Madja said, she paused giving Azriel a stern look, because he hadn’t moved.  
“I won’t listen, I will shield the room from outside the door, but I’m not going upstairs” Azriel said, bargaining with Madja.  
“Fine, but I want to see the shield inside the room, so I know you’ve made good on your word” Madja said and shooed him out. The astute healer could see the Shadowsinger had an attachment to the female in her care, that had been abundantly clear the night before.  
Madja held the door, as Azriel’s siphons flared in the doorway, and a sapphire shield encapsulated the space inside the room, Madja swung the door shut and no sounds came in or went out. Azriel was good on his word, it was also his way of protecting Sanarie in his absence; he would have time to get to her if that darkness tried to take her.  
“The only healer I ever saw was my friend Korazsa, what is supposed to happen when you see a healer” Sanarie asked, feeling nervous as she wondered what would happen.  
“We just chat, and you tell me what you’re comfortable telling me and if I sense something I’ll tell you. This is just a conversation of words, healers energy and getting to know your health needs. If you have something which is bothering you or worrying you, you can tell me, I’ll have a look and we can go over options for treatment. If you’re not comfortable with something just tell me and we’ll work something else out” Madja said, putting Sanarie immediately at ease.  
“Can you look at my back, it has been crippled for as long as I can remember, I just want to know if I could ever walk fully upright” Sanarie asked.  
“Shirt off and face down on the bed, you can leave your under things on, I’ll work around them” Madja said, turning away and rummaging in her healers kit.  
Sanarie did as instructed, and Madja was soon gently pressing into the skin of Sanarie’s back, then rubbing in oils and Sanarie felt her healing magic probing her back and washing over her, then a soothing warm burning, which quickly turned into a burn of pain “Aw, that burns, is it supposed to be painful?” Sanarie asked.  
“If it’s fixable it will not burn in pain, it burns painfully when the scars run thick and deep, beneath the skin. I’m sorry, but your back cannot be healed, not by me or any healing magic I know of, none that wouldn’t likely kill you in the process” Madja said, patting Sanarie on the head gently as she felt her sadness swell. Madja wiped the oils from her back with a cloth, replacing them with the pain killing oils she’d bought, giving Sanarie time to process and compose herself after the news. Madja had never seen such scars, such deep scars, on both sides of her spine. She felt whatever had been done to Sanarie, surgery after an accident the most likely, Sanarie had blocked it out.  
“Thank you for checking anyway, the wounds are old, I knew it would be unlikely they could be fixed centuries after; whatever happened” Sanarie said, wiping the wetness from her face and moving to pull her shirt back on.  
“I bought this oil for any pain you may have, you can use it as needed, when you need more, I will have some at my healers shop” Madja said, handing the oil to Sanarie.  
“Will I be able to have younglings” Sanarie asked, she nervously looked at the door, that was a question she certainly didn’t want Azriel to hear, she didn’t want him knowing she was already wondering about the future. She never thought anyone would look at her the way he did, so she never thought she’d have younglings of her own, but now that someone did look at her like that, and wanted her like that, she had started to think very quickly; what if I want to and I can’t?  
“I don’t see why not, although once you began to show, I’d want you on bedrest each day for a period of time; and for longer, and longer as time went by” Madja explained.  
Sanarie beamed and said “I could live with that. One last thing’ she got up, moved to the bathroom and retrieved her medicine bottle from the bottom of a basket of scented oils, she held it to her and continued nervously. She felt safe with Madja, but she didn’t know what would happen next “Korazsa, she’s like my big sister, practically raised me, she’s a healer and she made this for me, my whole life. She said we had to keep it secret, because it was illegal, she said it’s dangerous for other people, but she said for me it’s medicine”  
“Spit it out child, I can’t help you if you don’t reveal your secrets” Madja said gently, sensing a very roundabout conclusion coming her way and trying to head it off.  
“I’ll need some more in a few weeks, can you make me some?” Sanarie asked, handing Madja the bottle.  
Madja took it popped the stopper, sniffed, replaced it quickly and handed it back to Sanarie “That poison is not medicine for anyone, not even you, I will not give you more of that, save for the antidote. I suggest you wean off it, if that can be done, I have never known anyone who choose to take that let alone long term, so I cannot say how you would manage such a thing. I suggest halving your dose, and then quartering it and so on” Madja said, she wasn’t exactly angry, but that poison had done enough damage in these lands, she would never supply anything but the antidote.  
“Am I in trouble” Sanarie asked.  
Madja surveyed her, softened and said “Not with me, but because of the nature of what is in that bottle, I suggest you disclose it to your sister, cousin and everyone else, at your earliest convenience”  
Sanarie nodded and asked “What is it called”  
Madja raised her brows, surprised that Sanarie didn’t know what it was, she took a step forward and whispered the name of her medicine in her ear. The colour drained from her face and the betrayal Sanarie felt must have been plain there, because Madja squeezed her arm and said “Whatever the reason your healer sister had for giving that to you, it must have been a good one”  
Sanarie’s eyes teared up, she went and replaced the bottle into the oils basket, she would tell everyone, tonight.  
Madja had opened the door and Azriel was waiting, “if you need anything else, just let someone know and they can bring you to me or bring me here”  
“Okay, thank you, truly” Sanarie said, and Madja gave her a nod.  
Azriel’s shield dropped, he sensed Sanarie’s sadness and marched into the room, to her and held her face in his hands, stooping to see her “Are you okay?”  
“I am, I swear” Sanarie said.  
“Come Shadowsinger, she is well, I need to get home to my family, and you both could do with some dinner” Madja said.  
“She is well” Azriel said Maria’s words, trying to pick what was emotionally wrong with her, what had happened.  
“She is, I’d like to see fewer ribs next time I see her, other than that, she’s well” Madja said.  
“What’s everyone doing for dinner tonight? I need to talk to everyone, I want Nesta there too” Sanarie said to Azriel.  
His eyes widened in surprise and he said “Everyone will be at the town house for dinner, even Nesta” Azriel said.  
“Good” Sanarie said.  
Jovial voices began to carry into the room, getting louder and louder, as Mor and Cassian approached, bantering with each other.  
“Do you remember Lord Deviln's face when he realized we were at the Vyisknet game last month, and he was busted accepting that poor female as a prize?” Mor laughed.  
Vyisknet was a savage Illyrian sport involving; nets, bets, favors, trades and sometimes; death.  
“I think he thought we’d given up policing the Vyisknet games, Rhys doesn’t care what they trade bar females. I like lulling them into a false sense of security that we’re never coming again, then show up when they least expect us. When we do it’s almost always at the boring games, when both sides lose all their nets, still have warriors to burn, everyone Yields and no one dies or comes close” Cassian said, sounding disappointed.  
Mor sighed dramatically and said “It’s no fun until someone falls from the sky and dies. It’s a shame the Catchers don’t count towards the Nettable players, can you imagine, you’re about to catch a netted warrior, stopping him from falling to his death and become netted yourself, then you’re all falling to your deaths” Mor said.  
“You savage little beast” Cassian said, in mock horror, lightly, playfully punching her arm.  
“What are you doing here?” Sanarie asked.  
“I’m here to take Madja home, Azriel you can manage bringing Mor and Sanarie to dinner on your own?” Cassian said.  
Azriel nodded, sensing Sanarie’s sadness beneath her calm, he kept scanning and scanning her, trying to figure out what was wrong.  
“Mor, could I borrow a bag, I need to bring something to dinner to show everyone” Sanarie said.  
“I bought you a leather satchel, it’s in here” Mor said, as she opened the wardrobe and pulled out a brown leather bag.  
“Perfect, thank you, you really did think of everything” Sanarie said, taking the satchel she went into the bathroom and shut the door.  
“Azriel take me outside the ward zone, drop me and I’ll winnow to the Townhouse, then you won’t be far from Sanarie and can come straight back for her, and I can make sure Nesta knows there won’t be a repeat of this morning” Mor said, holding her arms to Azriel.  
“I’m not dropping you from the sky” Azriel said.  
Mor sighed and dropped her arms as she rolled her eyes; Azriel and his chivalry.  
“I’ll throw you from the sky” Cassian said, enthusiastically, happy not to let such an opportunity to pass.  
“Of course you will, and I said drop, not throw” Mor said.  
Madja snapped her healers kit shut and said “I’m ready”  
“I’ll just throw this one from the building and we’ll be off Madja” Cassian said, jutting a thumb in Mor’s direction.  
Mor put her arms up in exasperation, Cassian took the opportunity to pick her up and left through Sanarie’s balcony doors, in under a minute he was back and taking Madja, with a huge smile plastered on his face.  
“You enjoyed that far too much General. You’d better not take such liberties with me, I saw you toss her like she was no more than a toddler” Madja said, shaking her head and pinching his cheek.  
Cassian feigned horror and said “I would never toss you Madja”  
“You tossed Morrigan out of the ward zone? She said she wanted to be dropped outside of it” Azriel said, looking unsurprised and nonetheless unimpressed.  
“You should have seen her face, priceless. Shall we my lady” Cassian said, opening his arms to Madja.  
“Yes, I have grandchildren to kiss and chide” Madja said, as she let Cassian pick her up.  
Azriel only had to wait a few moments after Cassian and Madja left for Sanarie, she came out looking refreshed but still seemed emotionally raw, and a little shy, feeling the same way he did about being unsure how to be with her after the day they’d had.  
“How do you want to be in front of everyone? Should I kiss you or only when were alone?” Azriel said, trying to break the ice and get the awkward conversation out of the way.  
“I don’t mind either way, but maybe just for now we won’t let on that anything is going on between us, I wouldn’t want to give Nesta any ammunition to discredit either of us” Sanarie said.  
Azriel nodded, although he didn’t think Nesta would succeed twisting their; whatever this was, against them, not after how pleased Mor had been upon learning of their kiss that morning.  
Azriel caught scented oils in the air and sniffed towards the satchel to be sure, before he said “you’re bringing scented oils to dinner?”  
“Yes, but not just that, I should tell you what else I have, so you don’t feel betrayed at dinner” Sanarie said, feeling her nerves rising.  
“Betrayed? What else do you have” Azriel asked warily.  
“You know that medicine Korazsa gave you?” Sanarie said.  
“Yes, what is it for? Your back?” Azriel asked.  
“No” Sanarie took a deep breath and pulled the basket from the bag, placed it on the dresser.  
“You’re worrying me, what is it you have” Azriel said.  
Sanarie took the bottle out and held it to her chest as she had with Madja, but this time she didn’t let it go she was worried he would destroy it when she said what it contained.  
“Sanarie” Azriel said, taking a step towards her, seeing her step back as be moved towards her he fell back.  
“I didn’t know what it was, I’d heard of it in stories, Korazsa didn’t call it by its true name, she always called it my medicine, said it protected me. I asked Madja if she could make me some more, but she refused, because it’s Faebane” Sanarie said, fearful tears brimming in her eyes, at the prospect of Azriel’s reaction.  
He took a sharp breath in, and then out, his shadows grew darker but he sensed her fear, so he leashed his anger about Korazsa giving her that poison, for five hundred years, if her powers and their bond had been there, he would have sensed her, his mate, he could have saved her 500 years ago.  
“Please don’t take it away, I start hearing voices and music when I haven’t had it for a few days, the night you got me, I was hearing things and feeling dizzy. I need it” Sanarie said, in a pleading tone.  
“I won’t take it from you, don’t unstopper it, not now and not at dinner when you tell everyone else. If you put a dampener on anyone’s powers accidentally by opening it, it may make people distrust you, Nesta will likely distrust you anyway” Azriel said, in a very matter of fact tone, bordering on cold.  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know what it was. I don’t know why she gave it to me, but now I’m scared to stop taking it. Please don’t be angry at me, please don’t hate me, I couldn’t bear it” Sanarie said, afraid he’d turn away from her after this.  
Azriel walked to her slowly, willing calm into every step, he put his hand on the bottle, Sanarie resisted giving it up “I’m almost certain you’re my mate, I would never hurt you; trust me with this” he said, at his words she slowly relinquished the bottle to his hand. Azriel tucked it into the same pocket inside his Illyrian leathers, as he had the night before.  
“You’ll give it back” Sanarie asked, in nervous question.  
“Yes, when we get to the Townhouse. Did you take any just now?” Azriel asked.  
“No, I’ll take it later before bed” Sanarie said, unable to meet his eyes.  
“Good, then I can kiss you, if you’ll allow me” Azriel said.  
Sanarie let out a sob, closed the half step left between them and wrapped her arms around his chest, crying as she did so, Azriel felt relief flow out of her.  
He pulled her up against him, supporting her back with one arm and caressing her tearful face with his free hand, he kissed her gently, lightly and pulled away again, she was still crying silent tears.  
“I thought you’d be so angry you’d hate me, thought you wouldn’t trust me. I swear on my life I didn’t know” Sanarie said.  
“I know, and so will Mor, she will see the truth as soon as you tell her” Azriel said, soothing her with kisses to her face, he felt her emotional burden lighten with every kiss.  
She laughed a little, tears of gratefulness now, and not so many as before.  
Azriel pulled away from her face and looked in her eyes “I won’t tell you not to take that, but I wish you wouldn’t, that is the reason your powers are locked away, and likely also the reason our mating bond won’t snap. So I’m asking you, not telling you, please stop taking it, we’ll deal with the consequences together” he kissed her lips tenderly so she could feel his sincerity.  
Her heart quickened and she said “You don’t understand, I’m crazy without that stuff, I hear sounds other people don’t”  
“I know, that’s something to do with your powers, we’ll deal with it, don’t be afraid of it” Azriel said.  
Sanarie looked unconvinced, she wasn’t scared of the Faebane, she was scared of what would happen without it; she was scared of her powers, of herself.  
“I’ll get some antidote from Madja, I’ll leave it with you, and you can keep it and decide if and when to use it. And now I’m going to kiss you properly” Azriel said, with a crooked smile, as he pulled her off her toes and nibbled on her lips, slowly deepening the kiss, until she sighed a little moan and ran her fingers through his hair. Sanarie and Azriel stayed locked together in their kiss until wings beat outside and feet thudded to the balcony floor and Cassian’s voice sounded from the door.  
“So it is true. Mor told us all about the mind reading and the kissing, but I didn’t quite believe it, Azriel and Mor’s sister, makes sense. Anyway, Mor is getting hangry, so she sent me to hurry you up” Cassian said, arms crossed across his chest watching Azriel take his time to gently finish kissing Sanarie.  
“Ignoring me, is it? I'll throw your female over my shoulder and take her to dinner myself, if you don’t hurry up” Cassian said.  
Azriel’s snarl was low but savage as he stopped kissing Sanarie and bared his teeth at Cassian “Go” was all he said.  
“Shit” Cassian said. He left them; feeling both astonished and amused.  
Sanarie had pressed her lips together to try and conceal her smile, at the territorial outburst, she liked it, she felt safe with him and everything he did just reinforced that feeling. Azriel saw her lips tucked away almost as they had been in the library and thought about how intimate it had felt, untucking her lip from her teeth just to claim her lips. He ran his thumb along the line of her bottom lip and pushed it up a little then pulled down, freeing it, he leaned in, captured her lips with his and massaged her lips with his own, heat spreading through them both. He pulled down on her chin, and opened her to his tongue, she was eagerly waiting for him and together they made each other, breathless and dizzy.  
Sanarie pulled away first, trying to take a full breath, she managed to say “We should go, before kissing isn’t enough” Sanarie was already feeling her body begging for more, so much more.  
Azriel chuckled and then hummed in agreement and kissed her one last time, before he took the weight of her behind her knees, with his other arm, he pushed the balcony door closed and launched them into the sky.


	12. Chapter 12

Azriel flew Sanarie over Velaris, after the sun had set, the city’s Fae lights were turned on and in the city’s night-time glow Sanarie could see the city without the light hurting her eyes. The sight was truly breathtaking, and one which was certainly worthy of her first look at Velaris. Azriel hoped Sanarie would fall in love with Velaris, and of course being in the air, with everything that entailed; the light wind on her skin, rippling through her hair and fresh air in her lungs as they soared over the city. Azriel watched as she closed her eyes and took in the feeling of being in the air “I love this, you must fly every day, not for the necessity of it, just for the joy of it” Sanarie breathed.  
“I do, it’s a compulsion to fly, like walking, talking or breathing” Azriel said.  
Sanarie opened her eyes and smiled looking behind him at his wings and said “They are magnificent” he could hear in her voice, she meant every word.  
“Thank you. Remember that decision we made about not showing everyone our bond yet?” Azriel said.  
Sanarie huffed a laugh and said “That’s gone to hell since we didn’t tell Mor to keep it to herself, and I dare say Cassian has had a great time telling everyone what he encountered just now”.  
“Those points and our scents are intertwined after all the, affection” Azriel said, tactfully choosing his word after pausing to consider it.  
“Oh well, I’m sure Mor will deal with Nesta if need be” Sanarie said.  
“No, when it comes to us, I will defend our bond. Mor will go to bat for you if Nesta attacks you, but if Nesta attacks us, she will face me” Azriel said.  
“Try and be firm, but fair, even I can see she has demons and that’s no excuse, but it is a reason” Sanarie said.  
“I will be fair, for you” Azriel said.  
Azriel folded space and they appeared on the door step of a townhouse, “who’s house is this” Sanarie asked.  
“Rhysand and Feyre’s, it’s their family home, a little more intimate than the House of Wind. They thought you’d be more comfortable acclimatizing there, under a mountain, but near to family” Azriel said.  
“It is a good place for me, they chose well” Sanarie said.  
Azriel knocked on the door and Elain opened it, as soon as the door revealed her in full she said “I’m glad we didn’t scare you away, I’m happy you’re here and happy to see you again” Elain reached out her hands and Sanarie took them, she let Elain lead her inside.  
“Thank you, I hope to get to know everyone and earn their trust. I of all people understand, trust is earned, not freely given” Sanarie said.  
“Nonsense. Madja trusts you, Morrigan trusts you and Azriel trusts you, that’s good enough for me” Elain said, patting Sanarie’s hand, which was held in hers.  
Azriel walked behind Sanarie and Elain, heart warmed by Elain’s kindness towards Sanarie, as he passed opposite the table to Cassian he received a mischievous grin and wink, which was met with Azriel’s warning growl, at which Cassian laughed and carried on talking to Lucien, who sat on his right. The whole exchange was noted by everyone else in the room, amusement or surprise marking its passing on their faces.  
Elain pulled out a chair to the left of the head of the table, next to Rhysand, opposite Feyre and Morrigan “Again, I’m glad you’re here, and I’m sorry we overwhelmed you this morning. We’ll be on our best behaviour this evening; won’t we Nesta” Elain finished looking down the opposite end of the table to her sister.  
Nesta dipped her chin ever so slightly and turned her head away, well, that could be seen as an improvement whether the dip was an acknowledgment or a bit of shame, hopefully it was a sign of a more peaceful gathering.  
Azriel leaned down to Elain as she passed him, and whispered “thank you” and kissed her cheek.  
She nodded with a smile which said ‘of course' and made her way to her seat at the opposite head of the table, next to Lucien and Nesta.  
“I’m glad we didn’t put you off” Feyre said to Sanarie.  
“I came from the court of nightmares, to the court of dreams, none of you could ever put me off” Sanarie said, feeling bad that they all felt so responsible, when she had been tired and overwhelmed by the whole situation; it wasn’t down to any one of them, the situation with Nesta had just been her breaking point. Not to mention seeing Azriel walk in with another female on his arm; that had been a little dagger in her heart, one she hadn’t expected, then he’d asked why Sanarie was there. She had felt like an intruder, and then Nesta put in her opinion confirming her feelings and that was it.  
“It’s just as well we can’t scare you away; because you’re stuck with us” Rhysand said, giving her a playful wink.  
“Oh, without a doubt, there’s no getting rid of us now” Mor said, beaming at her.  
“I hope that’s still the case after I tell you, what I have to tell you” Sanarie said.  
Rhysand raised his brows in surprised curiosity, then gestured to the table and said “the room is yours”  
Sanarie began to explain about the medicine, how Korazsa and her mother before her had given it and never used it’s real name. She explained what had happened with Madja and the advice she had been given, to tell them all immediately, that the healer had whispered to her its name and that it broke her heart, two people she dearly loved had lied to her and poisoned her, her entire life. Next to her Azriel removed the bottle of medicine from his leathers, and placed it in front of Sanarie, he could see she was having trouble finally spitting it out so he reached down to the arm of her chair and held her hand, trying to reassure her with his thumb brushing the back of it, Sanarie looked to him at that gesture and squeezed his hand, she looked to Mor, then her High Lady and finally at her cousin and High Lord “I thought it was medicine, I never questioned it, because I trusted my mother and Korazsa implicitly. But, it’s Faebane” Sanarie said, and whilst no one gasped or yelled, everyone at the table bristled. Sanarie didn’t look away from Rhysand, but she could have sworn she felt Nesta burning a death-stare into the back of her head.  
Rhysand had broken away from Sanaries eyes to look at Morrigan, she nodded confirming her sister had been truthful. Rhysand looked back to Sanarie before he spoke. “I will obtain more for you, so you can wean off it in your own time, 500years is a very long time, you shouldn’t be forced off it before you’re ready. I respect Madja’s right not to make it, so I will procure it myself” Rhysand said.  
Sanarie cried silent tears, their old demons; experiences with Faebane, had made them irked at the sound of the word, but they hadn’t judged her, and once confirmed by Morrigan hadn’t doubted her for a moment, this was how family was meant to be Sanarie thought. She felt so blessed she just cried her silent tears of gratitude and relief, for the second time that night “Thank you” she said, composing herself.  
“Faebane. She just admitted to being in possession of an illegal substance, and you’re not only going to let her get away with it, but you’re going to get her more? She could poison us all. Do you want her taking the powers of every person here, so her Papa can come in and do what he likes to us, to Velaris” Nesta said.  
Sanarie stood up as Mor and Azriel spoke in unison “Enough” Azriel said.  
“Nesta” Mor said, in warning.  
“I know we agreed you or Mor would handle this, but I want the opportunity to defend myself” Sanarie said to Azriel, then looked to Mor.  
Each nodded their approval, and both looked proud, it was a show of strength neither had seen from Sanarie.  
“I have never had a father, let alone a “Papa”. Keir tortured me, abused me; mentally, emotionally, physically. I have never known the love of a father, let alone a Papa. My father gave me these' Sanarie pulled back her hair on both sides of her head and turned it this way and that, there were some sharp intakes of breath before she continued ‘in my life he has; strangled me, beat me, starved me, cut me, trapped me in a coffin for days on end, where I was let out twice a day at dawn and dusk, to drink soiled water and eat soiled bread, I’m sure you can use your imagination for what that means. I was a serf; that meant I scrubbed floors, cleaned toilets, washed dishes, ate only bread and soup at dinner, and oats at breakfast and even though they were regular meals, it wasn’t enough sustenance.  
Very few knew who I was to him, those who did were spelled to never reveal my existence; including myself and the only friend, or family I had, so he could go on using me as his personal play thing. As a small child I watched him do unspeakable things to my mother, in the dungeons, where I was born and raised until age 8 when my mother died and I went into servitude.. There is nothing in my heart for that biological hazard, other than fear, hate and a desire to see him dead, so that I know without any doubt that he can never hurt me again. I’ve told you this, not to gain pity, but so you understand I have no loyalty to Keir Darkbringer; whom has only ever made my world blackest night. I wanted you here Nesta, because I thought you’d judge me harshly, and I wanted you to hear part of my story, so you could hear the sincerity in my voice when I told the unfortunate truth. And you still don’t believe me, you still don’t understand, because you cannot begin to fathom my existence up until last night, if you could you’d never accuse me of having any loyalty to my father” Sanarie finished and the room was silent. She hadn’t realized she could snap like that, but the idea of anyone thinking she had any loyalty to Keir made her sick with rage. Sanarie took her seat, indicating she was finished, she’d said her peace and surely that would be enough for Nesta to finally understand.  
“And what if he has spelled you to hand him this entire court on a platter” Nesta asked.  
Azriel stood to his full height, shadows growing darker around him, he looked down the table at Nesta daring her to say another word. Sanarie had been cleared by himself, Morrigan and Madja, was that not enough? Azriel felt a small warm hand on his thigh, he looked down rage on his face, and softened as he met Sanarie’s blue-green eyes, she slid her hand up his side, asking him to sit. He lent down and gently brushed her lips with his, his shadows diminishing as he did so, be resumed his seat and took her hand in his, rubbing his thumb back and forth again, assuring her his dark side would never hurt her.  
“Madja would have sensed that Nesta, why do you think we had her assessed last night” Feyre said.  
“You did?” Sanarie said, looking to Feyre, she had no memory of it.  
“You’d passed out and it was late, Madja only assessed you with her magic, I’m sorry for the intrusion” Feyre said.  
“No, it’s your job to protect us all and that meant protecting me and everyone else from me; until you could be sure I was no threat” Sanarie said.  
“Madja found nothing amiss, Morrigan sensed nothing amiss; and I’ve never known either female to be wrong, besides, if anyone could have sensed nefarious magic at play, Feyre Cursebreaker would have” Rhysand said proudly.  
“If you want someone to hold onto the medicine and just administer it to me everyday, if that would make you feel safer, just take it and entrust it to whomever you see fit” Sanarie said, picking up the bottle and putting it in front of Rhysand.  
“Good idea, I’d take her up on that offer if I were you” Nesta said.  
“Good’ said Rhysand, he waved his hand and the bottle appeared in front of Nesta ‘then you can have the honours. As long as Sanarie has no problem seeing you every day”.  
The look on Nesta’s face after Rhysand spoke, could have burned a volcano and its entire magma chamber to cinders.  
Sanarie smiled and said “None at all, the sooner she knows me the less she’ll hate me”  
“I don’t hate you, I just don’t trust you” Nesta corrected, as she glared at Rhysand.  
“That’s just as bad in Nesta’s book, but don’t worry, she doesn’t trust anyone, so try not to let it bother you” Cassian said.  
Nesta looked over at Cassian and took a calming breath, probably because she looked like she wanted to strangle him.  
“While I still have your attention, Madja said I’d never walk upright again, she said the scars in my back ran too deep to heal without killing me. Do you know of any magic, which could heal my back without killing me?” Sanarie asked, she desperately wanted to walk normally, and the pain every day. Whatever Korazsa did with her magic’s and oils had kept the pain at bay all these years, but now she was in pain all the time. Sanarie hoped it was just the 5 days in an Iron Womb, which had left the aching pain in her back, but she had a niggling feeling it wasn’t just that.  
“I’m sorry, if Madja says there’s nothing, that's likely the case” Rhysand said, feeling regret as he watched Sanarie’s face fall, the small bit of hope she’d had left, disappeared.  
“You’re perfect as you are, never doubt that” Azriel said, brushing her hair behind her shoulder.  
Sanarie nodded, but Azriel didn’t feel her sadness lift, and he felt other than learning of Korazsa’s betrayal, this was what had saddened her when she had finished with Madja.  
“Leave your walking upright with me, it’s not a promise of a cure, but maybe a means to help you walk upright” Feyre said, after Sanarie had spoken, she’d been pondering something, which given the Fae craftsmanship available in Velaris, could be made better and perhaps into a standing aid, for someone like Sanarie.  
Sanarie beamed at Feyre, hope kindling anew in her heart “Thank you” Sanarie said.  
“Let’s eat” Rhysand said and food appeared on the table.  
As chatter began around the table, Azriel lent down to Sanarie and asked “Are you okay sunshine”  
Sanarie smiled and looked at him “I’d forgotten until this moment, but my mother used to call me that when I was very little, no one has called me that in an age”, Sanarie lent on his shoulder face still tilted up at him, Azriel lent down and kissed her tenderly, until a girly ‘aaaaaaw’ sounded from the other side of the table.  
He looked up to see Mor and Feyre looking at him, as if he was a small kitten. Azriel frowned at them, muttered “Bloody nosy females” and decided kissing Sanarie was a good distraction from the looks on their faces, so he lent down and kissed her again.  
“Told you” Cassian said, to Rhysand.  
Azriel’s growl rumbled from his throat, his lips were still on Sanarie’s; Rhysand chuckled. Azriel deserved happiness with a female, they all did, after all the wars and the waiting.  
“Cassian what did you do to make Azriel so defensive towards you regarding his female” Rhysand asked.  
“Told him if they kept ignoring my message about dinner, I’d throw his female over my shoulder and take her to dinner myself” Cassian said, looking pretty pleased with himself.  
Azriel growled again and said “you won’t touch her”.  
“I would handle her with care. I would never toss her from the sky” Cassian said, and at the last part turned and winked at Mor.  
“I’m still thinking of a way to punish you for that, you little shit” Mor said.  
“When the mating bond does snap and it will, if she accepts, I’ll be fighting Rhysand, because I love you like a brother Cassian, but I really think I may kill you sometimes, even on a good day” Azriel said.  
Cassian laughed heartily as he loaded his plate with food.  
“We always knew it’d be you and I, although Feyre could square off against you if she wanted” Rhysand said, looking to Feyre as if to say, what do you reckon?  
“Maybe, I’ll see what a newly mated Shadowsinger looks like first, I might decide to go south to the mortal lands; I won’t risk this pretty Fae face” Feyre said.  
Now Rhysand and Cassian laughed hard, even Azriel cracked a small side smile and nodded to Feyre.  
“How long will the Tiny Ancient One be in the Summer Court visiting her lover?” Cassian asked, then started stuffing himself, much to the disgust of Nesta.  
“I believe she has decided before she makes Varian move here indefinitely, she’ll see how she feels about the Summer Court. She’ll stay there for a few months and then they’ll both come here for a few months, and then they’ll decide; either way Tarquin and I will have to work out a custody agreement for special occasions. Naturally he’ll want Summer Solstice and I’ll want Starfall, but I’m sure we can negotiate on the rest” Rhysand said, amused about how the past 2 years had played out.  
“I know she only left this morning, but I’m half expecting Tarquin to bring her back within the week” Cassian said.  
“She swore she’d be on her best behaviour, and I promised some jewels on her return, if she keeps that promise” Rhysand said.  
“Of course; sparkly bribery for the Fire Drake” Cassian said.  
The clatter of cutlery on china, and the occasional clanging of crystal were the only sounds, which accompanied the first few minutes of the meal, everyone had been hungry. Sanarie tried a little of everything but mostly just ate some buttered bread, keeping in mind the conversation she’d had with Azriel in the library. After 500 years of simple, bland foods, her stomach would need time to adjust to the rich foods and spices, and her freedom of food.  
At one point Azriel looked down at her plate and nodded his approval “Remember; whatever you want for the rest of your life. This restraint is just temporary”  
“I know, it’s okay” Sanarie said, giving him a genuine smile.  
“Sanarie, I was wondering if you’d like to join me at my house in the Garden Quarter sometime? Perhaps a late supper, tea and cake, if it’s after dark your eyes won’t be pained” Elain said.  
“Absolutely not, you are not putting yourself at risk, by spending time alone with her” Nesta said.  
“Enough Nesta, stop using me as your excuse to distrust people, you have the word of 3 reliable sources, and now you have the Faebane in your possession, so enough. You don’t have to welcome her into your house Nesta, but she is welcome in mine” Elain said, putting down her cutlery and looking at her sister, in a manner which Sanarie supposed was as stern as Elain could ever get.  
Sanarie didn’t know what to say, she didn’t want to drive a wedge between the sisters, so she gave Elain a small appreciative smile, which was returned.  
Azriel, Mor, Feyre and Rhysand all exchanged subtle looks, having witnessed Elain stand up to Nesta, for the latter 3, the second time that day.  
“I hope you all enjoyed that. I needn’t be here, seeing as none of you want a voice of reason” Nesta pushed her chair out and stood.  
“Nesta, no one wants you to leave, just be kinder to Sanarie. Rhysand and Feyre accept her, Morrigan and Azriel accept her, she has even been cleared by Madja she is no danger to us” Elain said.  
“Rhysand and Morrigan are her family, their guilt is enough to buy her free reign, and Azriel has her scent all over him, I wouldn’t be surprised if they’ve fucked already” Nesta retorted, making some rather rude assumptions.  
“Enough. She is my mate, you will not speculate about us and you will keep your doubts about Sanarie to yourself” Azriel said, quietly, his voice laced with silent menace.  
Cassian grumbled his protest at that unspoken threat against Nesta, Azriel simply ignored him.  
“Someone else can administer her poison tonight, I’m walking home. Don’t even think about it” Nesta said, as she turned to see Cassian who had predictably, half risen from the table when she’d given the details of her movements.  
Cassian said nothing as he took her words for a challenge, rose fully, walked around the table and put her arm in his.  
“Cassian, take the Faebane, once Nesta has cooled off, you can fly her to the house of wind and she can administer it” Feyre said, it was a tone of command from his High Lady, not suggestion from his friend Feyre, Cassian went back to the table and picked it up.  
“I’ve never known you to be cruel sister” Nesta said, not looking at her.  
“It’s not cruelty, Rhysand was right in giving you the task, you need to know Sanarie and see in her what the rest of us do. So you will administer the Faebane every evening until you can tell the Morrigan truthfully that you were wrong, and her sister is not the threat you thought her to be” Feyre said.  
“For better or worse, we are ALL family here, and I believe if the situation was reversed, we would all be trying to do right by you Nesta” Rhysand said.  
“Don’t leave Nesta, stay and eat with us, just be kinder to Sanarie, poor thing has been through enough” Elain said.  
“I’m leaving now, I will see her later” Nesta said, before she walked out. She could be heard swatting Cassian away before the front door opened and then shut again.  
“Poor, Cassian” Feyre said, knowing he’d take the brunt of Nesta's emotion, but also knowing he’d do so gladly.  
“Was I too harsh?” Elain asked, looking consumed by emotions.  
“No sweetheart, it’s what she needed to hear, and it needed to come from you. You did nothing wrong” Lucien said, hand on her shoulder, rubbing it soothingly.  
“Lucien is right, you weren’t harsh at all. She’ll see she was wrong, in time” Feyre said.  
“I’m so sorry, the last thing I’d want is to create problems. Should I have come to you, Feyre and Morrigan alone?” Sanarie asked.  
“No, you had every right to speak, and I appreciate you candidly telling your truth, and parts of your story. I’m sorry for everything which has happened to you, we would have rescued you sooner if we'd known” Rhysand said.  
“I know you would have, I’m grateful you came as soon as you knew, I don’t know how you broke the spell and found out, but I’m glad you did” Sanarie said.  
“The spell, yes, I had wondered about that after the exchange you had with Nesta” Rhysand said, wondering how it had been broken after almost 500 years.  
It was a part of his job Azriel kept to himself, the HOW he got his information was his secret and right as Spymaster “The spell was broken by Truthteller and that’s all I will say” Azriel said.  
“Who is Truthteller” Sanarie asked.  
Azriel tapped the daggers hilt at his belt.  
Sanarie’s eyes widened and she took a breath and asked “Did someone die after the spell broke and they revealed me”  
Azriel felt conflicted, he didn’t want to lie to her, but he also didn’t want to traumatize her with the details, so he simply said “Yes”  
“Who” Sanarie said.  
“One of Keir’s personal guard” Azriel said.  
“Dracon” Sanarie said, surmising who, as there was no war, disappearance or death of a personal and highly trained guard was rare, so it wasn’t hard to guess who.  
“Yes” Azriel said.  
“Elder brother of Elias, younger brother of Handel; nasty males all of them” Sanarie said, Azriel realized part of him had feared she’d sympathize with his victim, and that she’d pull away from him. But her energy did that lurch of fear and anxiety as she’d said Handel's name, just the same way it had in the library when she’d eluded to a male taking her against her will, and Korazsa killing that male.  
Azriel looked at her and swallowed his rage, his shadows chaotic around him, his breathing was quick, on the other side of the table Mor blanched and pulled back into her chair.  
“Azriel, what’s wrong” Rhysand asked.  
Azriel looked at Rhysand and said “Nothing”, but his shadows did not diminish.  
“His eyes are black” Mor said to Rhysand.  
Sanarie glanced up at Azriel and his eyes were black, at the other end of the table, Lucien pulled out Elain’s chair and stood in front of her.  
“What happens when he’s like this” Lucien asked, hand on a blade at his waist.  
“He’s okay, but stay where you are, just in case” Feyre said.  
“Azriel do you want to go for a fly and a spar” Rhysand asked.  
Azriel turned to Sanarie and said “You said he was dead”  
All the colour drained from her face and she began to shake “I thought he was dead” tears started streaming out of her eyes, fear gripped her heart as it beat hard in her chest.  
Her fear upon Azriel’s realization that Handel was her abuser, and was not in fact dead, made Azriel’s rage worse. The entire room began to darken, a dark wind of his shadows spun around the room and began to sound like a roar.  
“I hate it when he gets like this, he reminds me of Keir” Mor said in a small voice.  
“Go, all of you” Rhysand said.  
Feyre was at the other end of the room in a moment, she winnowed Elain and Lucien out.  
“Sanarie” Morrigan yelled at her hand stretched across the surface of the wood table, fingers out stretched.  
Sanarie shook her head and mouthed ‘no, you go’ Sanarie swallowed her emotions and wiped her tears away, she knew how to calm him, she felt it in her heart.  
Mor didn’t wait she just winnowed.  
Sanarie put her hand on the same spot of Azriel’s thigh as she had done earlier, and slid it up slowly as she stood slowly beside him, she braced her hands on his shoulder to help support the weight of her upper back, Azriel whipped his head to her. Unlike Mor, she didn’t see the golden hair and brown eyes of Keir Darkbringer, she saw the dark hair and the small bit of hazel around his dilated black eyes, she saw her Shadowsinger, her mate, the darkness; which tricked the darkness of the Hewn City enabling him to save her, and the only darkness she’d never fear.  
Sanarie knew words wouldn’t be enough, so she did the only thing which she had noticed spellbound him more than her eyes, she held his gaze as she sang Nightsong.  
Slowly Azriel’s shadows slowed, the roar stopped and Sanarie’s voice was louder. When she finished singing, she pulled his face towards her with her right hand, her left braced against him for support, and kissed him tenderly and for a long time, until his breathing slowed and the shadows were only curling around himself and her. She said softly “When we go to war with the Hewn City, which we all suspect is not far off, Handel is yours, until then you will have to imagine what you and Truthteller will do when you get your hands on him. I did not know, I wouldn’t have slept in 300 years or walked the Hewn City alone if I’d known he was alive” Sanarie said.  
“He’s in the dungeons, he has been there for 300 years, I drew every truth from Dracon’s lips until he had nothing left but agonized screams and I will do the same to Handel” Azriel said, in the quiet lethal calm which had replaced his loud fury.  
Rhysand could he heard sighing a deep breath through his lips “Well, if Nesta could have seen that, it may have gone a ways to quelling her doubts”  
Sanarie laughed and shook her head at Rhys, as Azriel’s arm came around her and supported her against him.  
“I’m sorry if I scared you” Azriel said.  
“Your darkness is my shield, it could never scare me” Sanarie said, brushing her fingers through his mussed hair.  
“I’m going to go check on Feyre and the rest, they’re at the house of wind, I’ll see you both there” Rhysand said, he waved his hand and the whole table setting disappeared, quickly followed by Rhysand himself.  
“I can’t go to the house of wind tonight, I need to be home, and I need you with me. Just to sleep, just to hold you, my home is warded, you’ll be safe there; spend a day or two with me” Azriel said.  
“I’d love too” Sanarie said.  
Azriel wrapped her in his arms, lent his chin to her shoulder and just held her to him for a few minutes. Before Azriel pulled away he kissed her shoulder, then her neck, then her jaw and finally her lips. He murmured “I will always be your shield, I will always be your safe place”  
“I know, it’s okay, your darkness doesn’t scare me. Morrigan may be my sister, and we may look very close to twins, but we are not the same. You do not scare me, do you understand me?” Sanarie said.  
Azriel smiled “I can’t believe you exist” he said, and kissed her again, for a time which seemed without end.


	13. Chapter 13

Sanarie woke after she’d spent the night with Azriel in a huge bed, clearly made for his massive wings, she had slept on one side and he the other. When Cassian had flown Nesta up to Azriel’s terrace, and Nesta had poured Sanarie’s dose for later that evening, as soon as she’d opened the bottle, both males had been on edge, it had proved to be too much for Cassian. Cassian had said “I can’t be here, I can’t smell that” then rocketed into the sky with Nesta. After she took the Faebane, Azriel had been distant, on edge, and that was okay, Sanarie could understand, because Korazsa had told her all about how it had been used in the war. They’d lost too many good warriors, too many good friends, because of the Faebane poison, which leached the Fae magic for a period of time, which in battle was catastrophic.  
Sanarie sat up and fluffed her pillows, so she could lean back into them and wait for Azriel to wake, Azriel must have felt her move because he, pushed himself off his stomach to meet her gaze and he looked; like hell.  
“Did you sleep at all” Sanarie asked, her concern clear in her tone.  
“I slept enough” Azriel said, a blatant lie, he hadn’t slept at all.  
Sanarie gave him a look which said she didn’t believe him “Come to think of it, have you slept at all since you retrieved me?” Sanarie asked, calculating the time they’d spent together and realizing she hadn’t seen him asleep once.  
“A little, before you woke yesterday morning. It was a mistake, I should not have fallen asleep” Azriel said.  
“Azriel, you’re not invincible, you need rest like everyone else, if you were so worried you should have had Cassian, Rhysand or even Feyre take over for a while” Sanarie protested his selfless foolishness.  
“It’s my job to protect them too, the only one facing that darkness will be me” Azriel said.  
“Well of course’ Sanarie said sarcastically, he picked his chin up and looked at her, he was stone faced but she sensed a subtle scowl along his forehead ‘was it the Faebane, which kept you from sleep last night? I think actually smelling it was too much for you and Cassian last night” Sanarie said. She looked down and thought about how Cassian had reacted after Nesta had poured her dose for that night, he hadn’t looked like his usual bright self. Cassian had gone pale and anxious, he looked haunted, likely by his memories, which smell can often trigger so strongly, whether good or bad. Azriel had locked the medicine away, not because he didn’t trust her, but because next to unreadable or not, he looked disturbed in a similar way to Cassian. When he retrieved it later and she took it, he’d looked raw, although now that Sanarie thought of it, maybe that’s what she’d felt in the air between them. Raw nerves, from memories; the kind which never fade in remembering sight, sound and especially feeling, the kind which put you on edge, as if you’re really there, just holding it together, so you can survive.  
“It’s not your fault, but yes, the stuff does affect me, even though you scrubbed the scent out of your mouth, I just couldn’t; it’ll take some getting used too” Azriel said, he’d clarified when he lacked the words to fully express his feelings.  
“I’m sorry” Sanarie said.  
Azriel moved closer to her, tucked her hair behind her ear and as he saw her cringe a little, he followed the motion with a kiss to the top of her ear. She leaned her head back on the pillow and giggled “that tickled” she said, before he kissed the outside edge of her lips and then fully on her lips.   
“Don’t be sorry, Cassian wasn’t upset with you and neither am I” Azriel said, and pushed the pillow down as he slid his arm under her head, and kissed her a little more, making up for his distance during the night.  
Before they could get caught up in each other, two little Illyrian males burst through the double wood panelled doors opposite to the wall of windows, which lead to the terrace. They clattered into the room with a cart full of toys, breaking the morning silence. They each held wooden swords in their little hands, brandishing them at each other, sparring and giggling, their black wings stretching and constricting in excitement, both vying for Azriel’s attention.  
“Papa’s back” the tiny one said.  
“Papa, watch me” the slightly bigger of the two said.  
“No Papa, watch me” the tiny one demanded.  
“I can watch you both at once” Azriel said, sounding amused.  
Sanarie looked to him in surprise, they said ‘Papa’ and meant Azriel, no one had said anything about him having younglings. It didn’t bother Sanarie, she loved children, the younger they were, the less poisoned by the world, and so the kinder they were, little children in the court of nightmares had sometimes been the only living creatures to speak a kind word to her, other than Korazsa of course.  
The younger little male who looked around 2 years old flapped his wings, lifting himself a small way off the ground, he evaded a lunge by his big brother who couldn’t have been older than 5.  
“You missed me!” the 2 year old exclaimed, giggling and taunting his big brother.  
“You cheated, Papa, Uncle Rhys and Uncle Cassian said no flying mid-battle until we’re both seven or older, I could have killed you” the elder said, real concern in his voice.  
Azriel chuckled a low amused noise, as they jumped onto the bed, and looked at Sanarie intensely.  
“Who are these cuties” Sanarie asked, with a genuine smile. Unknown to her before or not, kids this sweet and innocent deserved nothing but peace and kindness.  
“Little males who needed a home and a Papa after the war with Hybern” Azriel explained, thinking of the week after the final bloody battle when Cassian had started to deliver the awful news to the families of the men he’d lost in the sky and on the ground. Azriel would never forget Cassian walking into the townhouse with two little Illyrian males one still basically an infant at that. He’d said he couldn’t leave them alone and orphaned in one of the most brutal war camps, they wouldn’t have survived the winter, and there had been enough death and suffering. It was hardly surprising, that Cassian; the once little male who had survived an Illyrian war camp alone, knew that existence, and didn’t want it for any other child. Azriel had taken them on in that instant, as he had done with his younger brothers in a way, Rhysand and Cassian all those years ago, they’d had Rhysand’s mother, but they had needed him too. Caldron knew Cassian would be a great dad, when he had a reasonable female by his side, to reign him in. Rhysand and Feyre deserved their time alone, Rhysand and Feyre had given enough. Mor had things to consider, Elain was still adjusting to being Fae and having a mating bond, Nesta was devastated after witnessing the death of her father, and lord knew as scary as he likely seemed to the tiny brothers, he wasn’t going to subject them to Amren as a guardian. No, Azriel had been the best choice of guardian for Atticus and Alistair. Besides he’d already taken in an orphaned teenage Fae girl after the attack on Velaris, and besides organizing outside help to come in once a week give or take, to clean, garden and the like, she had the time to care for two little males and he made sure to pay her well. She’d refused help to pay for her parents funerals, so he’d made sure her wages would make up for whatever she had to borrow or sell to pay for them.  
“Alistair, Atticus, I told you no running, and yet you run anyway. I’m sorry Azriel’ Sorca said, stopping dead for a moment when she saw Azriel in bed with a strange woman cuddled up to him ‘younglings, you’ve interrupted Azriel. Now; out, out”  
“Leave them, they’re a good distraction. Besides Sorca I need to introduce them to my Mate Sanarie’ Sorca’s eyes widened at that, she was young, but she understood the gravity of what ‘mate’ meant ‘and we’ll all need some breakfast, you should eat with us if you and these rascals haven’t already. I’ll watch them while you’re busy; they wouldn’t dare misbehave for me’ Azriel drew up darkness around him, made it darken his face especially, and deepened his voice before he said ‘now would you’ the little males shook their heads in fear, and Azriel dropped his shadows and returned his voice to normal ‘good. Little Atticus, is 2, young Alistair, is 4&1/2, this is Sanarie she’s my Mate, do you know what that is” Azriel said, and waited for any realization on the part of the males, which didn’t come, they were too young, he decided to just see what they made of himself and Sanarie together.  
Sorca was still shocked by the information she’d been given, but she came back to herself, and left quickly, to go about her work.  
Alistair played with some Illyrian warrior toys; which Sanarie realized looked similar to Rhys, Cass and Azriel, then he watched as his little brother Atticus crawled up the bed next to Sanarie, she felt his little body lean on her as he surveyed her intensely. Sanarie looked to her right as he lent into her and her pillows, he offered her his little sword and said “You can play with my sword if you like, it’s called Truestrike”.  
“Thank you, it’s a lovely blade, but I wouldn’t know the first thing to do with it, maybe you can show me” Sanarie said, offering it back to him.  
“Okay’ he said, snatching it back playfully, he jumped off the bed and ran to the cart, he grabbed up a small leather shield, he turned on his big brother and said ‘This time Truestrike will flay you to your bones!”  
Sanarie laughed, and smiled at Azriel she said “I like them”  
It warmed his heart that she liked his wards, younglings he'd very quickly come to love and protect as his own sons.  
Together they watched the little males fight, the elder clearly giving ground to his junior, letting the little guy best him almost every time. Sanarie laughed a joyful laugh, the kind of sweet, surprised laugh, which can only be had when in the presence of little children, who’s uniqueness and lack of experience makes observing them both surprising and touching at the same time.  
Azriel shifted and began to remove his Illyrian leathers.  
“You slept in your leathers? That can’t have been comfortable’ Sanarie exclaimed as she realized what he’d done ‘why?”  
“Because I wanted to give it 24-48hrs before I let my guard down, you know why’ he said cryptically, as he glanced at his playing little males, he didn’t want them to know about the darkness ‘it has been over 36hrs, I think if anything was going to happen it would have already” Azriel said, as he removed his leathers, and his shirt, tossed them onto the chaise at the foot of the bed, then got up to fetch a fresh one from his wardrobe.   
Alistair ran over and threw on Azriel's shirt and leathers, on the 4 & 1/2 year old youngling they barely cleared the ground “HA!’ He cried, gesturing to the black leathers and shirt ‘I’ve been named the Shadowsingers heir, surrender now, or die!”   
At this Azriel laughed so heartily Sanarie turned to him, she wanted to see his face, his eyes were smiling, they did it subtly when he was with her, but with his charges, his sons, his whole face was light and smiling. When she took stock of his whole relaxed posture she should not have been surprised when her eyes were met with a shirtless, bear chested Azriel. Her jaw dropped as she surveyed the strong lean body of Azriel. She looked him up and down slowly, the black hair across his chest, and down his navel, which led to such muscles she’d never seen before. She flushed red and then pressed her lips together before looking down and away in embarrassment. She’d thoroughly surveyed him, she couldn’t help herself, and now she could have died of shame.  
He huffed an amused noise as be observed her, pulled his fresh shirt over his head and said “There’s no harm in looking” and climbed back into bed with her.  
She looked at him lips still pursed together, and Azriel was reminded of their kiss on the library lounge, how intimate it her felt untucking her lip, so he could kiss her. Azriel cupped her jaw with his fingers, ran his thumb along the bottom line of her lip and pulled it free, she sighed at the motion and he realized he had to be very careful at this moment, so he kissed her lips tentatively and briefly.  
“I’ll never get used to that” Sanarie said.  
“I hope not’ Azriel said, then looked to her things on the bedside; the necklace and comb Mor had given her ‘those are beautiful, they bring out your eyes, wear them often” he suggested.  
Sanarie smiled “Mor gave them to me, she said they’re 5 strands for each century, and for; every missed birthday, every missed I love you and every missed opportunity to stand up for me against our father”  
Azriel swallowed his emotion at hearing those words touched sadness and also rage, if he ever got the chance, he’d relish Keir’s slow painful death, not least for this slow declaration of civil war against Rhysand’s crown, but for everything. Every time he hurt Mor, especially that one time which he would never be able to forget. For what he’d done to Sanarie for 500years, he couldn’t forgive himself for letting the knowledge of her slip through his fingers. In time he would give Keir back everything he’d given out. Azriel could have forgiven Keir if it had been himself directly that he’d hurt, but he’d hurt the ones he loved, and he wasn’t done, be would declare war, that was only a matter of time. And they’d barely healed from the last one. No, Azriel would never forgive Keir, it could not be done, that was the way when someone hurt your family. The hate, rage and vengeance which lived in his heart, would only be silenced when he could take his pound of flesh from Keir. “Trust Mor to find many reasons to buy jewellery” he said using levity to stave off the emotion Sanarie’s words had stirred in him.  
“Mor loves Jewellery” Sanarie asked.  
“Oh yes, although, she can’t beat Amren for her obsession with sparkly adornments. Mor is especially known for her dress sense” Azriel said.  
“She got me this too’ Sanarie reached over and took the hair comb from the side table to give Azriel a closer look, she placed it in his big hands.  
Atticus and Alistair played happily around the room, Alistair reminding his brother how to hold his sword and then practicing manoeuvres together, they kept their promise of good behaviour to the dark Shadowsinger, who was their guardian and as a father to them, and continued to play nicely with each other.  
Azriel took the comb, brushed her hair back, twisted it and slid the comb back to where it had been the day before. He surveyed her face, head cupped in his hands, he wished the bond would snap, but he knew the wanting was in vein, until she stopped taking the faebane.  
Azriel kissed Sanarie gently before he pulled away from her, let out a weary exhale and frowned as he lent back into the pillows, he was exhausted.  
“You need some sleep” Sanarie said.  
“You two, practice your quiet time until Sorca comes with breakfast and I’ll give you your choice of sweets from the bakery down the road later” Azriel said, eyes closed and finger pointing in the direction of the noise in the room. He heard some rustling and squinted his eyes open at the noise across the room, making sure they did as they were told.  
Azriel watched as his little ones dropped their weapons and his armour and ran for an armchair by either side of the fire, each little male started digging around in the seats, they both pulled out a picture book each and Alistair read his with purpose right away, he was evidently determined to earn those treats. Azriel shook his head at them pulling books from the chairs, they were always putting things in the strangest of places.  
Atticus jumped up, ran to the cart, picked out a soft toy of an Illyrian warrior, ran back to his seat and cuddled it, whilst sucking his thumb as he turned the pages of his picture book. Sanarie thought she fell in love with the little guy watching that, she just wanted to scoop him up and cuddle him forever.  
“Bribery, works every time, worked with Rhysand and Cassian too, although they were old enough to behave and get along without bribery and deals, but they never did” Azriel said, observing the look on Sanarie’s face as she watched little Atticus, a good sign he felt, for the future he’d always hoped for, judging by that look, she wanted children in her life too.  
“My back is a little sore, I think I could do with some more rest too” Sanarie said.  
Azriel didn’t say a word, he just laid down in the huge bed and pulled her onto his chest.  
Sanarie let out a sigh, as she was able to take the pressure off her back, and being relaxed on Azriel’s chest didn’t hurt either.

Sanarie woke, unable to sleep any longer, she carefully shifted her weight so she didn’t wake Azriel, she looked over at the younglings, she saw that little Atticus was sleep, in a very funny position, she went over and picked him up, he stirred and opened his eyes a little, then closed them again and snuggled into her while he sucked his thumb and held his toy. He was heavier than he looked, but unlike High Fae children, he had wings.  
“I’m sleepy too” Alistair said, as he watched Sanarie tuck Atticus into bed next to Azriel.  
“Do you need a sleepy cuddle Alistair? Did you know cuddles are good for the soul” Sanarie asked the little male who, judging by the way he interacted with his brother; already felt a responsibility to Atticus, more than a big brother should. Sanarie felt no child should have to grow up before they’d reached maturity, so she gave the little male an in and hoped he’d be open to take it and let her and Azriel, take care of him and his brother.  
“Are they” he asked.  
“Oh, yes, that’s why Mamas and Papas need to cuddle their children everyday, so that when they have to let them go one day, it doesn’t break their soul to do it” Sanarie said, earnestness in her voice.  
Azriel had woken to the sound of Sanarie’s voice and realized either Atticus had crawled into bed or she’d put him there, he felt it was the latter. Now he watched her speaking to Alistair, gently coaxing him to let her care for him too, he watched in grateful amazement as Sanarie kept just fitting into his life, as if she was always meant to be here.  
Alistair pondered what Sanarie had said for a few moments then said “Azriel’s my new Papa, are you my new Mama?” Alistair asked.  
“Yes” she said and opened her right arm towards Alistair. Sanarie hadn’t looked to Azriel for permission, she didn’t wait for a moment before she’d given her answer, because she knew what Alistair was asking. She understood you do not hesitate when a child is asking you to love and protect them; especially when it’s what you’d hope they’d ask for, as it’s what they needed.  
Alistair ran over to the bed and crawled into her lap, he put the collar of his shirt in his mouth and sucked it, Sanarie thought it was telling that he didn’t put his thumb in his mouth like his brother, too big to suck his thumb but too little to give up the comfort of sucking something.  
Alistair snuggled into Sanarie saying “Do you know Nightsong” he sounded already disappointed, as if he didn’t think it would be the answer he hoped for.  
Sanarie didn’t say another word, she snuggled in Alistair, gently scooped up Atticus and began to sing whilst, she lovingly stroked the heads of the two little black haired Illyrian males.   
At that moment she was incredibly grateful to her mother and Korazsa for telling her their stories of the Female Warband, of the inclusion and tolerance of all Prythian races and the race of men. Because in her father’s court it would have been so easy for her to have grown up to hate other Fae races, as her father and his people did. She had the women who raised her, to thank for this moment, when she could bless two little males, with the comfort and love they so needed and deserved.  
As Azriel watched Sanarie with his sons his heart squeezed, she saw what they needed and didn’t hesitate in giving it to them, and that in itself was what they needed, a miniscule moment of hesitation would have put doubt in Alistair’s mind, and after losing both their parents they needed certainty and security above all else.  
Sanarie finished Nightsong and even she felt tired a new, Alistair and Atticus were both fast asleep in her arms “will you help me” she asked in a whisper, looking from Azriel to Alistair when she finished speaking, she couldn’t keep supporting his weight.  
Azriel reached over and gently took the little male from her, he held Alistair in his arms on the left side of his chest as he dozed, she lay Atticus in the middle of his chest as she got comfortable next to him, then lent onto his right shoulder as he lifted his right arm to put around her.  
Sanarie closed her own eyes “we can go back to sleep with them” she asked, hoping she’d done the right thing. Yawning, she pulled Atticus so he lay partly on her and partly on Azriel, she left her arm over the little one as Azriel’s other arm lay over Alistair.  
“Just what we all need I think” he said, pulling the blankets over them all and holding Sanarie to his chest, together they slipped into a slumber.

Azriel woke to Sorca sitting in an armchair, across the large coffee table by the fire, which she’d laden with all kinds of breakfast foods. She was crying “Sorca? What’s wrong?”  
“Well how would you be, I ask you?” Sorca said, sounding upset and irritated.  
Sanarie roused as Atticus jumped awake in her arms, at the sound of Sorca’s voice, and started wailing, she immediately wrapped him in a tight hug and started soothing him, she tucked his Illyrian warrior into his arms, but he threw it away and reached for her breaking his heart, and hers, crying. Sanarie, held him and shooshed him, and kissed his hair line. She looked at Azriel worried “It’s okay baby, it’s okay” she said to Atticus as she looked at Azriel.  
“He’s okay, he gets like this after he is roused from a deep sleep” Azriel said quickly, seeing the worry in Sanarie’s eyes, he reached over to pat Atticus' head in comfort.  
Sorca burst out crying even louder, between her and Atticus it sounded like the house was in mourning.  
“Sorca, what’s upset you?” Azriel asked again, he thought he knew but wanted her to be free to speak her mind.  
“I prepare this feast, and come back to see this, I’m only 17, Azriel, I can’t be their mother, I don’t know how, I’ve tried but I’m not Illyrian, I can’t keep them safe, I don’t have wings and they don’t listen to me. I want to be out with my friends on the weekends, and I love them I do, like little brothers, but I don’t know how to be a mother I just lost my own mother. And I’m grateful for Elain, she helps me with them sometimes, but’ she paused and looked at the scene before her and sobbed, managing to get out ‘they need this” gesturing to the bed. Relief for herself, and joy for her charges, that’s what her tears were.  
“Sanarie just got here two nights ago, they’ll still be in your primary care for a little while. But as soon as it’s right and safe with her powers, we’ll all be here together, I’m sure of that” Azriel said.  
“Can I come and see them every day” Sanarie asked.  
“You can live here if you wish, see that door’ he pointed at a door between the windows and terrace outside, and the fire place where Sorca sat. The door was a light white wood with frosted glass panels, a stark contrast to Azriel’s, room which was black & red soft furnishings and dark caramel and red timbers, it looked quite out of place this door way ‘that is the suite for the lady of the house and it is yours”  
“Would you like me here darlings” Sanarie asked.  
“Yes, Masa” Atticus pleaded, still crying quietly now, he seemed to be trying to say Mama and Sanarie, but excitedly mixed them into their own word.  
“Yes” Alistair said, climbing over Azriel for a cuddle with Sanarie and his brother.  
“Then I will come whenever I can, and I’m sure before you know it I’ll be living here” Sanarie said to Azriel.  
“Can I call you Masa too” Alistair asked.  
“You can call me Mama or Masa or anything else; whatever you like” Sanarie said, and leaned down to kiss his head.  
Sorca sat opposite and had started happily eating some food, whilst still crying.  
“Can we go to the bakery now” Alistair asked.  
“You were very good while your Papa got some sleep’ Alistair looked hopeful but Azriel wasn’t finished ‘but you can wait until after breakfast to have your treats from the bakery. I’m impressed with their quiet patience and how well they slept, are you impressed Sanarie” Azriel asked her.  
“Oh, very, from what I hear High Lord Rhysand and Cassian couldn’t have done better at your ages” Sanarie said.  
“General Cassian?” Alistair asked, excitement and awe plain on his face.  
“Yes, she does mean your Uncle; General Cassian” Azriel said.  
Sanarie looked at Azriel very surprised said “He’s a General, I had him pictured more as a loveable rogue”  
Azriel looked at her and smiled a contented smile.  
“You’re not thinking about Cassian now are you” Sanarie said.  
“Do you want to know what I am thinking” Azriel asked.  
Sanarie nodded and leaned over tilting her head up, asking him to kiss her.  
He chuckled, a warm, deep sound, put his arms around her and his sons, kissed her tenderly, then said “I was thinking that, you’re like oxygen, and being with you; is like breathing”


	14. Chapter 14

Mor had given them some space, now that Azriel knew without a doubt in his mind that Sanarie was his mate, and after Rhys had spoken to Mor explaining how Sanarie could handle Azriel’s temper and dark side better than any of them ever had, and given the details of what had happened; Mor was sure too.  
Mor was still concerned though, they were moving so fast, and her sister needed to adjust slowly to her new life, no one had counted on Sanarie’s mate being her rescuer. Now that the threat of the darkness seeking out Azriel or Sanarie had surely passed, Mor felt it was safe for herself and Azriel to leave Sanarie’s side, and for her to be alone sometimes, as that was something she sorely needed. Sanarie was an adult after all, almost as old as all of them; unlike all of them, she’d lived and survived the Hewn City and all it’s nightmares for centuries longer than Mor had, Sanarie deserved her autonomy and Mor felt she was just as equipped to handle danger, as any of them, probably even better equipped in some ways. Ailthough she’d still ask Cassian to teach her some easy self defence moves, which she’d be able to do, even with her disabled back and resulting posture.  
So Mor stood at Azriel’s front door, she couldn’t believe she’d never come here before, it was Azriel’s sanctuary so they left it alone, he hadn’t even told them about it until 200years after he’d bought it, when Amarantha had trapped Rhysand under The Mountain, in The Middle.  
Mor pulled the rope bell by the front door, it rang out on the front doorstep and somewhere inside the house as well, she rang and waited; three times before she let herself in.   
Mor walked into the lobby of the manor, letting the huge front doors bang shut behind her and was surprised by the size of the place, it was deceiving from the outside, because it was cut into the rock of the foothills, so it stepped back from the street, removing the 3 story buildings potential for dominating the street.   
Mor checked the double doors to her left, it was plainly used as a casual space now, huge, once likely used as a ballroom, but now filled with the comforts of home; comfortable chairs, children’s toys some bookcases, a huge fireplace, and soft rugs. Mor left pulling the doors shut behind her and went further into the ground floor, she found a staff dining room behind the stairs, next to the staff kitchens, clearly equipped for cooking banquets and feasts for many guests, and a large wash and storage room, full of cleaning and upkeep supplies. No one was awake, let alone working, for her to ask about the master of the house, how Azriel ran his manor was beyond her, with all this space and no one up and working. Mor went back to the entry hall and base of the stairs.  
The front halls double height and stairs lead straight up from the front door to the first floor, Mor tried to winnow to the top of the steps, she wasn’t sure if she’d be able to as the manor was warded but, Azriel had allowed for it and she manifested where she’d planned. The first floor was formal living, dining and entertaining space, which overlooked the entry below. The windows on the left where the living room resided looked over the park below, the windows and double doors on her right lined the dining room that looked like it could seat at least two dozen guests, if not more. It looked over a shady terrace and a small garden, for formal outdoor entertaining. This wasn’t where she’d find Azriel, so she made her way up one of the stair cases, which ascended in opposite directions from the top of the first. The hallway along the stairwell held 4 doorways which she could see. She went and opened 3 of the doors, letting them swing shut after checking each room; blue, green and lavender themed bedrooms had been behind each door; they were all formal, luxurious, suites, but very obviously deserted. The last room she checked out, was white and gold, spacious and bright, it was lovely. She went into the room and it held three bay windows, large windows lined another terrace and a bigger more beautiful garden on one side, overlooking part of the square and the shady cobblestone street which the entrance to the house also faced, on the other side. Mor had started to think; why hadn’t she bought this place?  
“Having fun exploring my manor house like a youngling” Azriel asked, scaring the hell out of Mor who spun around as she yelped in a startled tone.  
“Cauldron boil me Azriel, announce yourself before you walk into a room” Mor said, clutching her chest over her heart.  
“I winnowed” Azriel said.  
He was wearing a silk robe over cotton under pants, and had clearly just rolled out of bed “Do you always greet visitors in this state, or just old friends” Mor asked, shaking her head in disapproval.  
“You’re already inside my house, therefore friend or not, you need no greeting. Anyway it’s barely after dawn, the house is asleep, I was also; until you rang the bell, mul-ti-ple times and be-gan slam-ming doors like a grounded seventeen year old” Azriel said, annunciating her transgressions, whilst looking mildly irritated.  
“You kidnapped my sister. What did you expect?” Mor said, chiding Azriel with her hands on her hips.  
“Kidnapped?” Azriel said, he looked bored and that infuriated Mor.  
“Oh good you do hear me, yes, Kidnapped and I’m here to take her back to the House of Wind” Mor said.  
“She’s staying here, she, Alistair and Atticus are attached, she won’t want to leave them, so don’t make her feel she’s obliged to” Azriel said.   
Sanarie had spent a few days getting to know Alastair, Atticus, Azriel and his Manor. It became clear very quickly to Azriel, that Sanarie wouldn’t want to leave Alistair or Atticus, nor Azriel or his home. She had told him being there with him and the little males felt like home in a way she’d never felt before. She’d said it felt akin to when it was just her and her mother, or her and Korazsa, but it never felt safe in the Hewn City, for the first time in her life; she felt safe, and wasn’t that what home was meant to feel like? After that Azriel had decided she would stay, for her own sake and theirs.  
“You can’t latch onto her like this, she’s my sister, and none of us have seen either of you for three days” Mor said, voice slowly rising in irritation.  
“Not true; Nesta has, she has kept her word on the medicine” Azriel said.  
“As id that counts. Being dependent on each other like this isn’t healthy, especially not when she needs to adjust, slowly. She needs her own space and she does not need the complication of sex” Mor said, wondering aloud and hoping they hadn’t gone that far.  
“Not that it’s any of your business, but excluding the first night when yes, I needed her close so I could protect her if that darkness came, barring that one night she has slept in her room, in her bed, without me, and will continue to do so until she stops taking the Faebane” Azriel said. He had told Sanarie he couldn’t, wouldn’t touch her until their bond had snapped, until her powers were reinstated, until she’d stopped taking the Faebane. Once the smell of it got to him, the memories were hard to shake, and he couldn’t endure it, not even for her. He hadn’t lied to her the morning after her first night in his home, he couldn’t sleep until he was sure that darkness had not been sent by Keir as retribution, if that hadn’t been an issue, he still would not have gotten a wink. Once the smell of the Faebane triggered his memories, he couldn’t stop the replaying sound of warriors angry death cries, as they fought their immanent demise, the sound of snapping bones, the smell of blood, shit and death. Even for her, he couldn’t endure it.  
“I want her back Azriel, with me, I didn’t know I had her until 500 years had passed, I want my sister, I want a strong relationship with her and I know she’s your mate and you want that too, but she’s my blood. She needs me, especially when the lull after the chaos of her existence disappears and she starts to fall apart, I need her to trust me as much as she trusts you, because she needs a support system, not just a mate” Mor said.  
Azriel raked his fingers through his hair massaging he head and looked at Mor, he was tired, and looked at her as if she wasn’t telling him anything he didn’t already know, or at the least suspect. He disappeared, winnowed to somewhere in the huge house, before Mor could protest he was back in front of her, handing her a ring of keys “This, is the front door key, whilst the wards saw fit to let you in anyway, you should have them just in case. Choose any room you like, as you know Elain lives next door in the nearest staff townhouse, and Nesta lives across the street. Sorca you’ve met, my adopted younglings you’ve met but that was some time ago, they may not remember you, they’re all on the 4th floor with Sanarie and I. I suggest you take a room on this floor, you’ll be more comfortable here, without younglings to harass you, although if they take a shining to you, I can’t promise to keep them out of your bed in the morning, or the middle of the night for that matter. And they’ll probably think you’re their Auntie, as they do Elain” Azriel said, giving Mor the lay of the land in his house.  
“They’re on the same floor as you and Sanarie? I thought you’d hired a nurse for them” Mor said, dumbfounded.  
“The youngest wasn’t quite 1 when I got him, so he needed a nurse for a time, but when he was toddling around and beginning to fly, she left for a new baby to nurse. Sorca has done well enough with them when I’ve been away” Azriel said.  
“Are you their Papa” Mor asked, growing more astounded as she watched Azriel nod to her in confirmation. She thought he was just a guardian, but apparently she’d missed a great deal as she’d been busy after the war, comforting the people, checking warcamps for any refugee females, a pastime they knew the Illyrians enjoyed and now apparently her father had too. Then there had been that delicious warrior she’d stumbled upon in a war camp, cast out and badly injured. Mor had bought her to a convalescent hospital in Velaris, she’d been a female Illyrian, and managed to pass herself as a male her whole life to avoid getting her wings clipped, until she couldn’t after an injury to her shoulder, which upon healers care, her gender had been revealed. The injury she’d received in the final battle, Mor was grateful for, because it had saved her life, her airborne squadron had been shredded out of the sky, if it hadn’t been for Nesta sensing where the magic would go and calling Cassian to her, he would have died with his men. It had been a long, long time since Mor had found a woman like Nalum and she’d needed the comfort, which only connection emotionally and mentally, before physically, could bring.  
Mor would only see Nalum rarely if she moved into Azriel’s place, but she could leave her, set up in her place near the best shopping high street in Velaris. It was comfortable and Nalum had built up a new life in Velaris, to keep herself busy, she’d likely want her own place soon anyway. Neither female felt a lasting mating bond connection, it was a relationship of emotional and physical need, but they’d made no promises. Other than Nalum swearing a life-debt to Mor for saving hers, they were free to see other people. Cassian had just appointed Nalum female warrior trainer, who better to start training little females who wished to war like their brothers? The Illyrian Warbands had steadfastly ignored their commands to train females in battle, before chores, so when the young females in war camps hit a certain age, they could now choose to come and train in Velaris, under Nalum, Azriel and Cassian’s tutelage. Twice a year Cassian, Azriel and Rhysand went to each of the Warcamps and winnowed away any females who wished to train; it was having unexpected consequences, but good ones at that.  
Azriel saw Mor’s amazement and a plethora of different emotions pass over her face, he decided the only way was to show her, so he stepped forward and took her hand, then winnowed them into Sanarie’s room.  
‘Wow’ Mor managed to mouth, as she took in the room. What drew her eyes first was a big marble fireplace, with lounge and arm chairs surrounding it, a bookcase filled with books, potted plants and flowers. All the furniture was elegantly carved light wood, as was the lower half of the wood panelled walls, which gave way to the stone of the mountain. The second two thirds of wall were all carved into friezes and murals of Velaris and the night court sky. Light, soft animal pelts spread around on the solid stone floors, heavy curtains almost completely blocked out the bright morning outside, except for the 5 inches where the curtains were parted, letting light spill into the room, giving everything a golden glow -he was caring for her sister well, even adjusting her slowly to the light. Everything in the room was light or white, a blank canvas, which Azriel had built for his future mate to make her own. A dressing room, wardrobe and bathroom occupied a room behind the beautiful carved wood bed, and on the other side, Mother help her, was; a Nursery, with a crib and all.  
Mor looked at the bed closer and sure enough, Sanarie was there, a small black haired, black winged little male either side of her, snuggled in, sleeping. Mor turned to Azriel and punched him in the arm, not hard, but not playfully either, then whispered “She’s not your bloody wife, and yet you’ve all but put a fucking ring on her finger”  
Azriel grabbed her by the arm and winnowed her into the hallway outside the room, shielding their voices from waking Sanarie and the boys.   
“Do not think, because of my history with you, that I will not fight for my right to my mate. Live here, or don’t, I will marry and mate her when she is ready, until then, I know where she is, I can see to her needs and make sure she is happy. Don’t, question us in my house, or anywhere else for that matter” Azriel said.  
“You kidnapped, my sister and shoved her into your life, within 3 days of her waking up in Velaris” Mor said, through gritted teeth.  
“I love you Morrigan, but don’t test my patience. If you found your mate tomorrow, you’d get it, and neither Rhys, Lucian or myself would question the decisions you make together. I get it, you thought things would be a certain way, so did I, but your sister is my mate, and yes, MATE entitles me above you as sister” Azriel said, only slightly raising his voice on that one word.  
“It doesn’t count until it snaps into place” Mor retorted. It felt wrong watching them rush like this, Feyre and Rhys, Lucian and Elain, Cassian and Nesta; they’d all been slow to know or accept their bonds, the latter hadn’t even had theirs snap yet, just like Azriel and Sanarie, yet these two, were breaking the mold completely.  
“I didn’t believe in love at first sight, and when you strutted into that war camp 500years ago, I thought I felt that, but it wasn’t even a miniscule amount of feeling; compared to the other night when I finally got to see the light in her eyes, you don’t understand yet, but you will” Azriel said.  
“Don’t patronize me, we all get it, she’s your mate, and a part of you knew your mates face, but it was never me. I don’t care, I never wanted you like that and you know it” Mor said, voice rising more, she knew they were mates, but this rushing it may prove too much for Sanarie, and she just wanted what was best for her. A small selfish part of her felt her reared up at this whole situation, which was swallowing her dream of being young and carefree with her sister, going shopping, dancing and just enjoying being free and happy. Why should her sister be robbed of being young, and be shoved into motherhood before she has had a chance to enjoy her freedom or her youth?  
“I didn’t say that to hurt you, I wasn’t trying to patronize you, I’m trying to explain and I know you never wanted me like that and I know why, I knew then and I know now. I’d be a joke as a Shadowsinger and a Spymaster if I didn’t know and no I’ve never told a soul, not even her, nor would I” Azriel said, leaning down and giving her a knowing look as he pointed towards Sanarie’s door.  
Mor blanched at first, then went red, half embarrassment and half rage, he hadn’t said it out right, but it was enough “remove your shield, I’m leaving” Mor said, in a shaky voice, she wasn’t ready, she had to leave.  
“Keep the keys, any room on the 2nd floor is yours, move in anytime. I have never judged you Mor, I’ve only ever loved you at an arms length, and yes, I was confused for a long, long time. I’m sorry, for wanting you and making you uncomfortable, even though I knew about you, and I’m sorry for making you uncomfortable now. I am not sorry however for claiming what’s mine; and she is mine Mor. I will never keep her from you, but I need you to understand something, without being hurt. You and Rhysand you have each other, some family tether which binds you together in a way I have never been allowed to feel, not even fully with my own mother. The ties which bind Rhys, Cass and I are sacred too, but it’s different, it’s not the same Morrigan. With her it’s what I haven’t had, and wasn’t sure I’d ever have, she’s my mate, and thank the mother or fate, that she wants me, as much as I need her. I want to fill this house with family, and love them like I wasn’t, it started with those two little males who are now, my sons, and it’s a stronger need now that she’s here and wants to be here Mor. Do you think I’d do to her, what Tamlin did to Feyre? After seeing what he did to her, after everything she did for him and all of Prythian; I would never do what he did. A few days, that’s all I wanted to be sure she was safe, after that, and when she’s ready for the light or the night, she is free to walk out those front doors and explore Velaris, on her own, with a friend, with her sons, yes, they are hers, go in there and watch her with them and tell me they weren’t made for her arms. I am not her jailer, what I am is this courts Spymaster and if you’d witnessed what that darkness did in the Hewn City, you wouldn’t mind me being overprotective for just a few days, keeping her here, keeping her safe, is my job, and not just as her mate” Azriel was impassioned like Mor had never seen him, she didn’t think she’d ever heard him speak that many words at once.  
Mor exhaled and said “Not a word to anyone. I’m sorry too, I couldn’t bear it if you two jumped into this and were wrong, and I had to then choose between you. Plus, she deserves to dance and sing, drink and eat, explore, to be young and free like she never could be under that mountain in the Hewn City, with our father”  
“I know, she will never miss out, never want for anything and never wonder “what if...”, I will see she gets to be young and free. She will just have a family to come home too, that’s the only thing which is not what any of us expected, but its a good thing; go and watch her with the boys, you’ll see” Azriel said.  
“Fine, but I need breakfast, I’m going for a walk” Mor said, needing to think after the heavy conversation.  
“Go downstairs, out the front doors, and right past the park and keep walking, on the other side of the street 2 minutes walk if that, there’s a bakery. Tell Mikol you’re a friend of Azriel’s and he’ll take care of you, if you want two nephews who adore you from first impression, I suggest a chocolate filled donut for the 2year old and an iced, cream filled animal cake for the 4 & 1/2year old” Azriel dropped his shielding and let Mor decide what to do.  
Mor stood still and heavy after everything that had been said. She looked at him and said “So; right, past the park, Mikol, Chocolate filled donut, iced, cream filled animal cake?”  
Azriel nodded with a smile.  
“What does she like” Mor said, tilting her head to the door.  
“Everything, but I think she favours the assorted donut bites” Azriel said.  
“What do you like” Mor asked, curious.  
“I don’t have a sweet tooth...’ Azriel said and stopped abruptly as Atticus’ morning cry upon waking started, he heard Sanarie soothing him and then Atticus scream Papa ‘I’m coming’ he said and twisted the door knob, Azriel left Mor to watch as he got to Sanarie’s side and she sleepily handed Atticus to him, he walked around the bed and bounced him, held him close and kissed his head.  
Still in the bed Sanarie pulled a sookie Alistair into her side, she gently tugged the bed sheet he was sucking out of his mouth, and replaced it with his thumb “It’s okay baby, go back to sleep” she snuggled down next to the little guy and closed her eyes.  
“Mama” Atticus screamed, and reached for Sanarie over Azriel’s shoulder.  
Azriel turned around and put him on Sanarie’s chest under the covers, where he continued to cry until he looked up at Azriel when he patted his head and screamed “Papa” again.  
“You better get in” Sanarie said, eyes closed, still half asleep and reaching out for Azriel.  
Azriel looked at Sanarie and smiled, removed his robe, left it on the bed and got in next to her. Atticus crawled onto his chest, so he was sprawled half on him and half on Sanarie, he wriggled to get comfortable, pushing open Sanarie’s night dress exposing half of her chest with his tiny foot. Sanarie hadn’t noticed her night dress, Azriel looked away even as Atticus caught sight of Sanarie again and cried “Mama” he crawled back onto her chest with a few “oompf” noises from he and Sanarie, younglings were light, but bony. Azriel looked back a moment later as silence fell, his jaw dropped as he saw Atticus had latched on to Sanarie’s exposed chest, the top of his head next to his brothers, eyes closed and humming, little noises putting himself back to sleep.  
Sanarie was frozen, she looked at Azriel and said “I can’t take him off can I? He’ll be heartbroken”  
“It’s what he needs, but it’s your body, you decide” Azriel said, he didn’t think he’d ever seen him that peaceful with his nursemaid, let alone so quickly.  
“I mean, he’s going to be disappointed, there’s no mothers milk in there” Sanarie said, levity in her voice.  
“That’s not why he wants you” Azriel said, putting his arm under Sanarie and Alistair on her other side.  
Sanarie nodded and turned onto her right side taking Atticus with her, to face a sleeping Alistair, laying Atticus, still suckling on her breast for comfort, snuggled in front of her and his brother. She got her body comfortable including her breast, which was not entirely hers anymore, and put her arm around her younglings, as Azriel put his arm around all of them and kissed the back of her neck.  
Azriel glanced over his shoulder, he wasn’t sure when Mor had felt she’d seen enough, but she was gone. He felt even though it was a difficult conversation and it needed to be had, it was done with, they understood each other and had made peace. So until she returned, which he was sure she would, he slept contentedly, holding his mate and his younglings.


	15. Chapter 15

Azriel hadn’t been wrong about Mikol, he’d made Mor a bacon and egg sandwich with bacon and eggs from his own family’s kitchen and a fresh hot roll, straight out of his bakery oven. Mikol was as warm and inviting as he looked; he was tall, and round, with rich dark hair and eyes, and his big warm smile which filled his face and eyes. He’d called her Sanarie at first, but looked unsure, he soon realized it wasn’t Sanarie and she had explained that Sanarie was her sister and that her name was Morrigan. He’d then given her a big hug and said “San-arie, San-arie, sweet San-arie, you must take her these, her favourites, with our love’ and shoved a box into her arms, he’d piled on others too, two little ones for the boys, she hadn’t needed to give an order, he even piled on three more, two for Sorca a hot vegetable pastry and custard scroll ‘sweet Sorca, she must have her favourites too’ then Mikol leaned forward and spoke, trying to speak quietly but failing utterly ‘she will marry my son one day, I’m never wrong about these things” then winked.  
A short, blonde-haired, green-eyed, plump female emerged from the work room into the shop “Mikol, if he catches you saying that he’ll go and marry another female just to spite you” she chided Mikol with a smile.  
“Daesha, he would not, Sorca is so pretty and so sweet, he would never do such a thing. I’ve seen him buy her favourite sweets and leave them on her door, and flowers, and love notes, we taught our son to be a proper male who romances the female of his affections. But he will still have to get past the Shadowsinger, if he wants to court her proper” Mikol said.  
“He will be back from night guard duty any minute, so you’d better stop. I won’t have you ruin my chances of a lovely daughter because of your big mouth, you only gave me sons’ Daesha said, lilting up at the end as a reminder that he owed her some daughters, giving him a stern look, which she softened as a tall, broad, young man, who looked the age of a mortal male in his mid twenties, walked into the shop. He was the image of his father in looks; he had Mikol's brown chocolate hair and eyes, he was nothing like his fathers round body though; he was lean, muscled and strong, and a good extra foot or more in height, he also had none of his fathers wisps of grey at his temples. Daesha rushed from behind the counter and started fussing about him ‘What food would you like, you must be starving, my bear, you know you’re my favourite first born son”   
“I thought I was your favourite mother” a broken voice said from the door way which lead to the work room, a youngling who looked to be in his early maturity stood there and had the same chocolate hair as his brother but with his mothers green eyes.   
“You are my favourite second born son, we prayed to the mother a hundred years before you came, but we prayed too hard and just over a decade later, we were surprised with your baby brothers, Mother help us all” Daesha said, clearly a loving mother, and also in possession of a sarcastic, dry wit.  
Finally two little boys who looked no older than Azriel’s eldest ran into the room, they were blond like their mother, with the chocolate eyes of their father. They had the same colouring as her father and Mor wondered, had her bastard of a father ever been sweet and cheeky like these little boys; she had never known him to be anything other than stern or cruel. Mikol picked them up, threw one giggling little male over each shoulder before they could get to the counter which held their favourite treats, and marched them out of the shop, through the work room and left them in the backyard with instructions to stay there.  
“You two have your hands full” Mor said.  
“Yes, four sons will always keep you busy. If I’d had just one daughter, or if the twins had been females, oh, I might not be so tired” Daesha said, looking wistfully into the backyard, possibly imagining little females having a quiet civilized tea party with dolls, rather than the yelling and tumbling of her little males wrestling with each other over the grass, as if in a life or death struggle.  
“I’ll go” Mikol and Daesha’s eldest son said, making for the backyard as the sound of his brothers sparring intensified, which usually lead to one of them getting injured.  
“Thank you Kol” Daesha said, sounding relieved.  
Kol arrived after one tiny brother decided to play dirty and grab hold of his brothers ear, the other decided he’d give it a go too, and quickly the yelling turned to screeching. With more grace than Mor would have thought possible, Kol's big hands separated his baby brothers fingers from their respective ears and sat them down in front of him, to give them a talking to.  
“I’ll be sure someone’ Mor did a classic Azriel brooding stare and flapped her arms as wings, then gave Daesha a wink and continued ‘hears about that, might help him be swayed to a certain side when he does have words with him about a sweet someone” Mor said to Daesha, careful to be quiet, and covert in her whole pronouncement, which earned her a bright smile and a slice of chocolate cake in yet another box.  
“He’s actually Mikol Jr. But we call him Kol to avoid confusion” Daesha said.  
Mor nodded knowingly and said “I’d better be off, thank you for all your efforts, I’m sure you’ll see me again; I’m moving in across the street”  
“Oh, perfect, he’s been so lonely all these years in that big empty house, and now it’s set to be filled” Daesha said, genuine delight filling her face.  
“If you ever need a break from the two rascals in the backyard, send Mikol Jr. over with them and I’m sure they’ll have a ball with Azriel’s boys, in Kol and Sorca’s care” Mor said, giving Daesha another wink, and an open invitation to her gentle eldest to actually speak to Sorca in person.  
“You may have a free cake every time you visit” Daesha said, looking on Mor as her new favourite.  
“Thank you” Mor said, she paid Daesha for the goods and said ‘keep the change’. She was piled up with boxes and still needed more of a walk, so she magiced everything except the bacon and egg roll, onto the coffee table in the bay window sitting lounge of white and gold room, that she’d decided would be her space.  
“That’s a nifty gift” Daesha said, watching Mor send her goods to their destination.  
“Where did you send them” Mikol asked.  
“Everything bar Sorca’s went to my room, the former I sent to her room, wherever that is, intention with magic is just as good as knowing. And this I’ll eat as I run another errand” Mor said.  
“If we ever had to move, I might be asking a favour of you sweet Morrigan” Mikol said. Clearly “sweet” was Mikol’s word for all nice females.  
“Of course’ Mor said giving Mikol a smile ‘Thank you for everything, have a good day”  
“And you dear” Daesha called after her.

Mor hadn’t been ready to face Azriel after her visit to the bakery, so she’d winnowed to her place in the Trade Quarter, enjoyed the breakfast roll on her second floor terrace overlooking the early risers starting their days, then packed some things, and winnowed again once she was done magicing everything to her new home. Mor manifested a few streets away from Azriel’s manor and took the time to walk back, getting to know the streets around his place, she could see why the Garden Quarter was so popular among families, it was like an oasis in the middle of the city. Mor enjoyed nature of course, but she preferred her houses location, around the corner from the best high street in Velaris; she could always rely on a walk down the street by her house, for some shopping therapy.  
Mor winnowed into the hallway outside her room, and was met with the giggles and quiet naughty play of little children, having fun and doing things they shouldn’t be doing, before their parents woke.  
She pushed open the door to see one of Azriel’s boys one sitting in her window seat, covered in chocolate, cream and Cauldron only knew what else, still eating. Whilst the other little boy was nowhere to be found, she walked into her room and said “Hello little monkey, found the treaties I got you huh?”  
Atticus grinned and then in a shy move hid under some of Mor’s things, which they’d clearly been playing in, because her boxes and trunks were open, her armour chest thankfully -was closed, but her things strewn everywhere.  
“Where’s your brother cheeky charlie” Mor asked, in the direction of the now shrouded little boy.  
A little finger pointed out of a pile of her favourite dresses, towards the chest by the wardrobe, her armour chest. A prickle of panic went through Mor as she opened it and heard a startled cry of pain, followed by a more intense afraid wailing cry. She opened it and eyes widened as she saw the slightly bigger brother, had found her Seraphim Blades, unsheathed one and cut his little thigh on it, she picked him up under the arms and pulled him out of the chest, which held her armour and weapons. Blood was streaming from the wound, she held him in her lap on the floor whilst he screamed and she held her hand over his wound letting her healing magic wash into the wound, slowing the blood, stopping it and then knitting it shut. The curtains around the room closed almost fully on their own, then Sanarie and Azriel manifested in the room, Azriel let go of Sanarie as she rushed for Alistair, as Alistair cried louder upon seeing her, reached for Sanarie.   
Sanarie knelt and pulled Alistair into her arms “what happened, where is he hurt” she said panicked and searching for the origin of all the blood.  
“They got into my things, my armour and weapons were locked in that chest they must have found the key in my Jewellery box” Mor said, sounding rattled.  
“But where is he hurt” Sanarie said, still sounding frantic.  
“Morrigan has healing ability, no doubt the wound is healed already” Azriel said, sounding the calmest in the room.  
“Here” Mor said, and pulled open the slice in Alistair’s trousers, to reveal a two inch long, shallow cut. Mor placed her hands over his cut again as Alistair calmed and watched, when she pulled away the only signs of the injury was the blood and cut pants.  
“Why did you bring weapons here” Sanarie asked, angry that her younglings had been put in danger.  
“The chest was locked, I swear, it has a padlock and key, the key is usually in my jewellery box” Mor said.  
“Where is Atticus’ Azriel asked, walking around the mess, and seeing his little toes sticking out from a pile of material made his way to the bay window seats. Azriel stopped and said ‘Auntie Morrigan, needs to come and retrieve her nephew”.  
Mor got up wondering why he didn’t just pick him up himself, she walked past the mess, to the window seat where Atticus was still hidden under a pile of Mor’s dresses and upon closer inspection; some of her dainty things. She huffed a laugh and said “They’re clean Azriel, you could have got him yourself”  
“Boys, what have you done to Auntie Morrigan’s things” Sanarie said, as she’d watched Mor and registered the mess they’d made, it definitely was not the work of anyone but younglings.  
“It’s okay, you’re not in trouble I promise’ Mor said, plucking lacy garments and dresses off of his head, once he was revealed his hands were over his head, still hiding. ‘It’s okay, look’ she said, as she scooped up Atticus, he opened his eyes and looked at Mor. She smiled then waved her hand, the boys were clean and her things put away ‘see easy fix, you’re not in trouble. I will need my key back though and you’re not to go into my armour chest again, do you understand” Mor said, sitting down next to Sanarie with Atticus in her lap.  
“Is this the lock” Azriel said, holding a small platinum silver lock.  
“That’s the one” Mor said.  
“Which one of you swallowed the key” Azriel asked, surveying the boys knowingly, they both pointed at the other.  
“Come on, you won’t be in any trouble, but neither of you are having any treats from Mikol's for a whole week” Sanarie said.  
“Nooooo” Atticus cried.  
“No, please Masa” Alistair said.  
“I love you both, but clearly you need a break from sugar. Now which of you swallowed Auntie Morrigan’s key” Sanarie asked, looking at both of them with a mothers no nonsense face.  
“I swallowed it” Atticus said.  
“No I did” Alistair said.  
“Auntie Morrigan knows when you’re lying, so don’t bother” Azriel said, amused by his younglings, neither taking the blame and then both taking it.  
Mor pulled Atticus up to see his face and said “it’s very brotherly of you to cover for your big brother, but sometimes Adults need to know the truth. Don’t lie next time okay”  
Atticus nodded and said “I’m sorry Auntie Morrigan”  
“That’s okay baby, thank you for apologizing” Mor said.  
“So who gets to check Alistairs’ poop for the next 24hrs?” Sanarie asked.  
“Not it” Mor said.  
“Not it” Sanarie said.  
“Of course. You going to help me check your poop” Azriel said, grabbing up Alistair and tickling him.  
“No Papa, no poop, no tickles” Alistair said, giggling and squealing.  
“If you’re on poop duty, Mor and I should go to the library; I need to start looking for information to get Korazsa back” Sanarie said.  
“You’re free to go to any library in the city, with Mor or alone, but I’d be more comfortable if you had a self-defence lesson with Cassian first” Azriel said.  
“I can teach her” Mor said, feeling frustrated that everyone always forgot she was as formidable and well trained as the rest of them.  
“I know you can, but I need her to experience being attacked by someone much bigger than she is, not just someone her size” Azriel clarified.  
“Where is Cassian this morning, I want Sanarie to have her freedom to roam as soon as possible” Mor said.  
“I can’t train today, it’ll have to be at night” Sanarie said, concerned Mor had forgotten about her eyes.  
“Oh I thought of that” Mor said, then waved her hand to Sanarie ending the wave with her palm up and a pair of glasses with tinted black lenses on them.  
“What are those” Sanarie asked taking them.  
“They’re for overly sunny days, or for people sensitive to light, or just a pretty accessory. Try them on, they're yours” Mor said.  
“No one in the hewn city has these, I’ve never seen them before” Sanarie said, opening the glasses and putting them on.  
“They suit you little twin” Mor said.  
“Azriel, will you open a curtain” Sanarie said, scared to get too close to the windows in case the glasses didn’t work in the light; even though she couldn’t see anything in the dim room.  
Azriel pulled back a curtain slowly and Sanarie didn’t flinch, so he opened it all the way, still she seemed unphased, so he waved a hand and opened them all, nothing.  
Sanarie stood up and walked to the window “My eyes sting a little, if I have a hat with these for the meantime, I think I’ll be able to walk around in the day” Sanarie said.  
“I wanted to take you out this afternoon, get you out of the house before you start going stir crazy” Mor said.  
“Cassian can likely train her this afternoon, but tomorrow you’ll have the day” Azriel said.  
“Can he train me in these and with a hat” Sanarie asked, wondering if that’d work, considering it’d be a physical lesson.  
“That won’t be necessary, I’ll shield you both with my shadows, you won’t have any impediments while you learn with Cassian, but they’ll be perfect for you to enjoy your independence, on the sunny streets of Velaris” Azriel said.  
“I want to learn with Uncle Cassian” Alistair said, from Azriel’s arms, while he stuck his finger up Azriel’s nose and then pulled his ears and mushed his face into different funny positions.  
“You, have definitely had enough sugar” Azriel said to Alistair, not bothered by the silly sugar-high youngling in his arms.  
“It’s been so long since we saw Uncle Cassian, can we please learn with him too” Alistair said.  
“You can learn one manoeuvre each and then it’s Mama’s turn” Azriel said.  
“One he’ll teach Masa and one with a weapon” Alistair said, bartering for more rough and tumble time with his uncle.  
“If he has time” Azriel said.  
“Treats from the bakery instead if he doesn’t” Atticus asked.  
“Oh, absolutely not. Mama said no more for a week, and I stand by that decision” Azriel said.  
“Where have I been” Mor asked, marvelling at how Azriel was with his sons, and how Sanarie just fit into the life that he’d built.  
“Busy” was all Azriel said, with a knowing looked on his face.  
Mor flushed and turned away “We’ve all been busy”.  
“War will do that to you, before during and after. At least the big war is over, and now we just have to deal with our father” Sanarie said, then looked to Azriel who was shaking his head at her not to say anymore.  
“Lets get ready then, you two, go to your room and pack a bag each, I won’t leave you with poor Sorca when you’re like this” Azriel said, to a hyper Alistair who had resumed pushing and pulling his face into different funny positions.  
“I’m ready for the day, you and Sanarie go do what you need to be ready, and I’ll watch these little troublemakers” Mor said, she liked them already, she always wanted to be an Auntie, never thought Azriel would be the first to have kids, let alone accept a mate, but here he was.   
“That would be perfect, thanks” Azriel said.  
“Thank you. I’m sorry I was short with you about the weapons, if they hadn’t been naughty and into your things, they wouldn’t have been in danger” Sanarie said.  
“Don’t even think of that, you were worried, if it was my younglings screaming and then bloodied clothes I’d woken up to, I’d probably feel the same” Mor said.  
“You okay now baby” Sanarie asked, checking with Alistair before she left.  
“Yes Masa, Auntie Morrigan fixed me” Alistair said, wriggling out of Azriel’s arms.  
He got to the floor and ran to Mor, hugged her, then Atticus said “Lets show Auntie Morrigan our room”  
“Yeah” Alistair said, pulling Mor’s arm to get up.  
“Have they been winnowed before?” Mor asked Azriel, he nodded and she smiled and then all three of them disappeared.  
Giggles and footsteps could be heard on the floor above, as the boys ran to their room with Mor following behind.  
“Will we ever have a non-eventful morning ever again” Sanarie asked, sounding a little drained.  
“We’ll see” Azriel said, he walked over and knelt by her, brushing the hair out of her face, and kissed her gently. He reached under her and pulled her into his arms, and winnowed her back to her room, so she could get ready for the day.  
“I’ll see you in a little bit” Sanarie said, then reached up to kiss him one last time, before he left to ready himself too.


	16. Chapter 16

Azriel had faith in his sons flying abilities, Alistair was a good cautious flier, Atticus was young, confident and took risks in the air, but he knew what to do; Rhysand, Cassian and himself had taught him and continued Alistair’s training. So Azriel knew without a doubt that after he winnowed to the House of Wind, a little higher and farther back than usual, giving them time to correct any mistakes; they’d let go of his Illyrian leathers, fly well and land safely on the balcony outside the dining room. It was necessary because Azriel had to carry the females, but it was also practical and the boys didn’t get to practice flying at great heights unless they were supervised, it was very unlikely, even as small as they were, that they’d make any mistakes. Illyrian younglings were born to fly as much as High Fae younglings were born to walk, many Illyrians would argue their younglings urges to use their wings was stronger, than any other races to walk.  
Sanarie took some convincing, but once she was sure they’d be okay she relented, and they’d been ready to spend their day at the House of Wind. The plan was to leave the boys to play with an attendant, giving Sanarie, Mor and Azriel the morning to research in the Library, not just about Bryaxis, but about any kind of powerful, black, cloud-like creatures Prythian had ever seen. They hoped this time would be more fruitful, they’d soon have to branch out to other libraries within the city, to be sure they searched all their resources before calling in any favours from other High Lords, to search their libraries.  
It was a warm day, with a slight breeze, no severe weather to worry about with the boys, Sanarie had the glasses Mor gave her to shield her eyes, and a sun hat to protect her too, and the boys each had a satchel of toys and books to keep them occupied for the morning, until they could enjoy watching and learning self-defence, or “Warrior Training” with their favourite uncle.  
Azriel manifested in the air above Velaris, and felt his sons let go of his leathers, he watched them pop out their wings and Alistair speed for the balcony with precision, he was very proud watching him in that moment. Azriel looked around for Atticus and sure enough there he was flapping around in some clouds, giggling and playing in the air “Atticus, we can play later, head for the balcony” Azriel said. Then Azriel turned back to see Alistair speed into the ward zone, just as an object hit the barrier behind him and fell away, it was an arrow, dread went through him as he searched for Atticus in the sky, he was still playing, he was in danger, they were all in danger.  
“Atticus, fly to your brother now’ Azriel commanded, in his loud voice and no nonsense Papa tone. It grabbed Atticus's attention and he looked up and began to fly for the balcony as soon as he saw Azriel’s face. It was too late, an arrow struck his left wing, right through the fleshy root, he screamed and passed out with the pain as he began to fall, ‘NO” Azriel bellowed.  
“Atticus” Sanarie screamed, without a second thought she pushed herself away from Azriel, kicked off his chest and was falling for Atticus. She sprang into action so quickly Azriel still holding Mor couldn’t stop her, she caught Atticus quickly her weight had carried her much faster than he was falling. When he was in her arms securely she flipped so her back was facing the ground, she braced herself around him, pulling in his wings around him, protecting him as they fell, so that his wings weren’t meeting resistance and his damaged wing wasn’t acquiring more damage.  
Azriel watched in horror as the scene played out before him, his son and his mate were falling through the sky. He pulled his wings back as far as they’d go, used all the sweeping force he could muster with his huge wings to push away from Mor, as he unceremoniously threw her through the air. She was caught off guard as he threw her, but didn’t struggle, she quickly made her body a shape which wouldn’t catch in the air. So she easily cleared the wards, then hurtled for the balcony, she just made it, clinging to the balustrade, she hauled herself up and called for Alistair to fly to her. He was basically there, but she didn’t want him to turn around and see what was unfolding behind him, so she made sure his attention was on her. She caught him in her arms and immediately took him inside, he didn’t need to see what ever happened next and if she was honest, she didn’t need to see either. Mor sent her thoughts out to Rhysand, she doubted he could hear her, but she tried anyway “Rhysand? I don’t know if you’re listening? Someone just attacked us outside the House of Wind, they shot Atticus out of the air, he and Sanarie are falling, Azriel will catch them, but we need you and Cassian”.  
Azriel dove for Sanarie and Atticus, then winnowed for them, manifesting behind them he wrapped himself around them both and then winnowed again emerging on the top step of Rhysand’s town house.  
Azriel banged on the door “Hello? Feyre?’ he yelled ‘please be here” he said to himself, praying to the Mother one of them was home, he’d hoped for Feyre, she could save Atticus’s wing with her blood. He eased down to the stone on the top step of the Townhouse, with Sanarie and Atticus in his lap, the terror of the preceding moments still thudding through his veins. Only a minuscule amount of time had passed, but watching the ground loom closer and closer behind his mate and son, using those moments to judge where he needed to be to catch them, made those moments and these, stretch and feel like time was bending and stretching.  
“Atticus, there’s so much blood’ Sanarie said helplessly, looking at all the blood pooled on the step. She held the tiny unconscious youngling in her arms ‘what do we do” she whimpered.  
“Just hold him, don’t move him if you can” Azriel said, moving Sanarie to his left so he could see Atticus in her arms.  
Feyre wrenched open the door and was horrified by the red blood soaking her doorstep, she pushed old traumas aside, they would always be there, but they didn’t control her anymore. She didn’t panic at the sight of blood, or shut down, she could rationalize with herself, push it away and function normally “What happened” Feyre asked.  
“Arrows, one bounced off the wards and one hit Atticus, they were inside the city, aiming for my sons” Azriel said, the fury thick in his voice, whomever did this would pay very dearly, before Azriel drew every secret from their lips and every bit of life from their bodies.  
Feyre looked at Azriel confused and said “Two arrows, Azriel” she broke off just as Sanarie coughed a wet cough, which Azriel knew well after two major wars, dread ripped through him at that sound, as he looked to her and saw what Feyre had. There were three arrows, the third was in his mates side.  
“It’s hard to breathe, my chest feels so heavy’ Sanarie said, as she slumped into Azriel, and coughed up more blood down his leathers ‘Oh” she said as she registered what the blood meant.  
“No, no’ Azriel said desperately, cupping Sanarie’s head to his chest, ‘please save them, I’ll pledge you anything” Azriel begged Feyre.  
“That won’t be necessary, there’s no bargain for helping family, I’ll do everything I can to save them’ Feyre said, her audible voice was steady and calm, but inside, down the mating bond she was screaming for Rhysand and briefly telling him what was happening, if she couldn’t save Sanarie or Atticus, Rhys needed to be here to save Azriel, from himself. ‘Get them in on the dining table, let me take Atticus” Feyre said, as she gently took Atticus from Azriel. His wound was leaking, but not as badly as Sanarie’s, they were ash arrows, she couldn’t tell if they were poisoned; but she saw with horror words burned into the wood, these were sent as a message.  
Feyre placed Atticus at the far end of the table, thinking it was a small mercy that he had passed out from the pain, or fear. She saw the last words burned into the arrow “King of Night, Keir Darkbringer”, a rage so potent ripped through her, that she had to squeeze her hands into fists to calm their shaking; Keir had used a baby to declare war, Feyre didn’t need to see any more of the arrow to know what this was.  
She bound Atticus’s wing in some cloth from her dress, to stabilize the arrow, so that it wouldn’t move or create any more damage, she prayed he wouldn’t wake up. She needed to leave him for a few moments and give Sanarie some of her blood, it wouldn’t help much until the arrow was out, but it would likely save her life. She took the blade concealed in her hairpin, sliced a slit in her wrist and made Sanarie drink, she protested with a moan which sounded like a muffled “No”, and looked to Atticus, “You need this first, I’ll see to him in a minute. It’ll buy us time, Rhysand is on his way with Madja” Rhysand had of course heard Feyre and told her he was coming.  
Azriel took a relieved deep breath, Sanarie was still here, she had Feyre’s blood in her now and Rhysand would be here with Madja any minute, she would know how to save Sanarie.  
Rhysand appeared in the hall and let Madja walk into the dining room before him, he looked at the table and felt sick, because that was his nephew lying there, with an arrow through his wing. Whoever did this would have three of the most powerful Illyrian males in history ripping them apart for days, which wouldn’t be necessary, to learn who sent them, but Azriel might just drag it out as recompense; and Rhysand would gladly let him. Though Rhys didn’t think they needed to look far for the source of such cruelty, he felt the depravity of Keir Darkbringer laced in something this sick and twisted.  
“Madja, Rhys’ Feyre said, relieved when she saw them walk into the room ‘do you have a sleeping potion, he'll need one for this. And I need a saw to cut the arrow” she said, leaving Sanarie to Madja and Azriel, her duty was to save Azriel’s sons wing and then Sanarie’s life, when her blood could properly heal Azriel’s mate.  
Rhysand said “I’ll keep him asleep and free of pain” he waved his hand, and a saw appeared next to Feyre’s hand. Rhysand sat by Atticus and helped Feyre, while he gently held Atticus’s mind and kept him asleep and unaware of the pain or any damage to his wing. He didn’t want him knowing if possible that anything was wrong, he was so young and if the wing wasn’t permanently damaged, he didn’t want Atticus to be afraid to fly again. Rhys could only glance at Sanarie and Azriel, he couldn’t have his mate ripped away from him, she was changing him, opening him up. Azriel didn’t deserve this. His son and his mate, one injured -possibly forever and one dying.  
Everything was moving so slowly, Sanarie was already pale from a life lived without sunlight, what alarmed Azriel was; her usually red-pink lips were a pale pink, he knew by that sign she didn’t have long.  
Madja set to work immediately, unlike Atticus, Sanarie was used to pain, so she hadn’t lost consciousness yet, but he could see she was struggling to stay aware, as she bled on the table, and coughed and spluttered out what bled inside her lung. He held pressure around the arrow in her left side “I love you, it’s okay, you saved Atticus, probably saved his wing too. Just hold on, hold on” Azriel said as he kissed her bloody lips and stroked her hair.  
“Give her this, it’s the fae bane antidote, if she does have magic as we suspect, it’ll be big magic, no one gives someone they love that poison; unless it’s to hide something, that magic may just save her life and Feyre’s blood will be useless to her arrow out or no, if that poison is still her system” Madja said.  
“No” Sanarie said, barely audibly, the small effort cost her and she coughed more blood again.  
“If you want to live dear, take it” Madja said.  
“She’s not dying today, let alone this millennium’ Azriel said, he pulled the cork and poured it down Sanarie’s throat so she couldn’t refuse or stop him ‘I’m sorry, but I can’t lose you, he can’t lose you” Azriel pointed to Atticus at the other end of the table. Who had the arrow out and was being given Feyre’s blood, he was healing fast, but Rhys kept him asleep and out of pain, he also didn’t need to come to and see Sanarie like this.  
“Look at the arrow...” Feyre said, down the mating bond.  
An irate roar sounded in response down their bond, when Rhysand had rolled over the tipped end to see who the arrow was from, and the title he’d designated himself. Keir Darkbringer had declared war using his brothers mate and son; the stewardship was over, another war had begun, and Rhysand’s family was already paying the high price of war.  
“This will hurt” Madja said, as she prepared to pull out the arrow.  
“No it won’t” Rhysand said, because he held two minds in that room, no one he loved would feel pain if he could help it, it was the only way he could help them. He should never have allowed Keir or one of his people into Velaris. Madja pulled the arrow and Sanarie didn’t move or even whimper, because she did not feel pain.  
“Now what” Azriel asked helplessly, cradling Sanarie’s face, her breathing was short and shallow, before her eyes closed and she lost consciousness. Azriel let tears slide out of his eyes and he leaned over her and kissed her, then listened to her breathing.  
Feyre had finished giving Atticus her blood, he hadn’t needed much and wasn’t in danger of dying. Sanarie had been hit with the arrow through the bottom lobe of her lung, she’d needed Madja’s seasoned care, Atticus only needed Rhysand and Feyre to care for him and his wing. The work was quickly done and Feyre stood over Sanarie, she pushed Azriel down so he could listen to her heart and breathing, close to her chest. Feyre tipped up Sanarie’s chin and let her blood go down her throat again, the healing power of Dawn in her veins slowed the bleeding and started to heal Sanarie. Something it couldn’t have done properly with the arrow in her, or the faebane still in her system; both which stopped Fae Magic.  
Rhysand scooped up Atticus and said “I’ll bathe the blood off him, put him in fresh clothes and then let him wake, away from this”  
“No, let me, please. You may be needed here” Elain said, from the doorway, taking Atticus from Rhysand’s arms and glancing down to Sanarie who already looked dead.  
Rhysand was surprised, but relieved to see Elain and Lucien, he knew Nesta wouldn’t be far behind, likely Cassian had sent guards to Nesta and Elain as he searched the city with others. They had been checking in on a Vyisknet match when Feyre’s panicked voice started screaming down the bond, Rhys had winnowed Cassian away immediately, left him in the barracks with a quick explanation of what was happening and that he wasn’t to let the attackers get away. Then he’d gone and grabbed Madja, he’d given her about 2 seconds to object if she had a serious patient to see to, but she hadn’t, Rhysand had summoned her kit bag and they came through space to his entry hall.  
It was all done so fast, that perhaps Sanarie’s life would be saved and no permanent harm done; but they had been so lucky in the war, and Rhysand kept waiting for the Mother’s luck to desert them. There were no screams or fighting sounds in the street, so Rhysand surmised whoever had shot down his family, was trying to flee, or hide, rather than attack the city and go out in a blaze of glory. Cassian was already out there looking for them, with guards of the city on high alert. Whoever they were they wouldn’t make it out of Velaris, not unless they could winnow.  
“I’ll help you’ Lucien said, then seeing Elain’s distress for Azriel and Sanarie added ‘She’ll make it, you’d have seen it if she wasn’t going to”  
Elain nodded and they left with Atticus, Elain stopped by the lounge where Nesta was and said “Go look, and tell me you can still say she’s with Keir” Elain looked down at Atticus’s bandaged wing, and a tear slipped out, they’d targeted a baby. Nesta had softened a little when she saw what they’d done to that tiny male, Rhysand had bandaged his wing, as the wound closed using healing power of dawn to speed his recovery. The bloodied bandage around the root of his wing, made Nesta think of Cassian’s wings, the times he’d been broken and still tried to come to her, the pain it cost him. Cassian was a male, a general seasoned in injury and pain, this was a little male, and someone had shot him down.  
Nesta did look, and when she saw that Sanarie looked dead, she shifted perceptibly, because a female looked to be dying, and the sight of the heartbroken Shadowsinger hovering over her, combined with what they’d done to that little male, pushed Nesta from fear, to fight. Sanarie still had a heartbeat, barely, but it was there. Nesta went to stand on the front doorstep, but Nuala and Cerridwen were already there, removing the blood, knowing it was a wound for Feyre. Nesta moved past them, down the steps, and stood behind the garden gate. Nesta was the death hound at the gate, god help the assassins if they came here, Nesta would gladly alleviate her guilt of doubting Sanarie, Mor, Azriel and Madja by ripping them apart. When she thought about how many valued sources she’d doubted, she felt stupid, guilty and only forgave herself a small amount, when past memories flitted into her mind. Her past made her weak, because she; couldn’t trust, couldn’t rely on anyone, couldn’t let her guard down, couldn’t love too many. For the ones she loved were taken from her; her mother, her father when he just gave up, her sister across the wall, then again when she was no longer even mortal; her father again, just after he’d redeemed himself fully and she felt she had someone to rely on, and then he too was taken and that had been the final straw, it broke her utterly. Cassian, who vowed to always protect her and Elain, he’d almost been vaporized from the sky with all his men, she didn’t know how she felt about him, but she couldn’t let herself know, because she couldn’t love a man who would always walk into battle with no guarantee of coming home.  
“It’s happening now” Madja said, as everything began to move, it felt like an earthquake.  
Azriel, Madja and Rhysand pinned Sanarie to the table, trying to keep her as still as possible, as her power tried to wrestle itself free.   
Azriel’s shadows undulated around him, a sign of his inner turmoil, which dampened slightly as the moving and shaking stopped, some of the colour had returned to Sanarie’s lips and her breathing was slowly getting stronger.  
“That’s enough Feyre” Rhysand said, pulling her away from Sanarie, she had needed to give her more blood than she had ever given to Rhysand; but Azriel’s mate was alive.  
“Thank you” Azriel said, not able to look away from Sanarie.  
“Of course” Feyre said, patting Azriel’s shoulder reassuringly.  
“We’ll leave you two alone’ putting an arm around Feyre and drawing her out the room ‘You’ve done enough, saved them both, but you’re pale; you are going to eat and drink, in bed, not negotiable” Rhysand said, his uncompromising tone let her know he meant it, as he winnowed her to their bedroom.  
Azriel didn’t know what else to do, so he stayed leaning over her, he wanted her to see him as soon as she woke up. He combed his fingers caked with her blood through her hair, whilst he spoke to her softly “wake up, please wake up, we need you” he lent down and kissed her dry bloodied lips, then continued on as he had, soothing her and kissing her, she’d come through the worst, she could make it.  
Madja frowned and bought forward another bottle of antidote, and handed it to Azriel “500 years is a long time, give her another dose, it won’t do her any harm, but it’s likely what she needs” Madja said, soothing any potential worries with her certainty.  
Azriel unstoppered the bottle, opened Sanarie’s mouth, tilted back her head and slowly let the antidote dribble down her throat, once the bottle was lying empty on the table, he glanced at Madja and wondered if it had worked, she nodded down at Sanarie and he looked back to her.  
Azriel watched captivated as luminescent, white, cloudy, smoke burst out of Sanarie’s chest, it burst out like a wave and passed through the whole house; Azriel didn’t know it at the time, but it passed through all of Velaris. For an age after, people would speak of the day, the light woke in Velaris and drove the pain lingering from the war, out of the dark recesses of their city and her people. Sanarie’s light sucked back into her body, and went back into that well of magic, which lived inside all Fae, leaving behind undulating light smoke around her.  
Azriel looked at her in wonder now realizing, she was, as he was, but the light to his darkness, his balance.  
Sanarie’s eyes blinked open, adjusting to the room and the light in front of her eyes. Azriel cried out as he watched her eyes open and lent in kissing her face and lips “Sanarie” Azriel asked, praying she was not permanently damaged and knew who he was.  
“Azriel? Atticus, my baby, is he alive, am I alive” Sanarie asked, surely she couldn’t be alive, she’d felt the life leaving her body, every bit of energy she’d had was gone with her blood; she had to be dead.  
Azriel lifted his head, relief washing through him, holding her he said “Atticus is alive my love, you’re alive” he kissed her tenderly and often. She was alive. Feyre and Rhysand with Madja had saved Sanarie’s life.  
He pulled back from her for a moment, he wanted to see her in her entirety. She looked at him intently and as the excited curiosity lit in her eyes, whisps of her light smoke undulated towards him, as he looked back at her his shadows met her light, they watched as their light and darkness danced together, nudging and caressing the other, their light and darkness merged and became iridescent, his darkness refracted her light and together created a shimmering kaleidoscope of colours, which shimmered and pointed out in different directions, before they fizzled away in the air between them. In that moment he felt a sensation which could only be described as a clap of thunder inside him, it took the breath out of him, be braced his hands on the table and slowed his breathing.  
Madja watched in amazement, there were very few things she’d not witnessed in her long life, but that, that was new or unknowably old. She slipped out, allowing Azriel time alone with his mate, she went to check on her High Lady, who had saved two lives that day and possibly a little males ability to fly.  
“What was that” Sanarie asked.  
“What are you” Azriel asked in answer.  
Sanarie laughed and said “Kiss, now”  
He lent down and kissed her tenderly, deeply and for a long time; savouring every moment, that he thought he had lost forever.  
“We are mates aren’t we” Sanarie said.  
“Yes, I felt the bond snap when our wisps joined and if I’m not mistaken, under all the blood’ he leaned in and sniffed into her hair ‘yes, my scent is woven with yours. It will get stronger if and when you accept the mating bond”  
“I accept” Sanarie said, naïvely.  
Azriel chuckled, she was such an innocent in many ways, even after so many years and so much suffering “That’s not how it works, I’ll explain later” he couldn’t believe she didn’t know about the mating bond accepting ritual, but he supposed no one thought she’d ever need to, and she’d likely never seen it happen.  
“No, I accept now” Sanarie said, sounding defiant and stubborn.  
“Later, besides the day you accept I want you to be my wife first, and you’re in no condition today. Aside from those reasons, Morrigan doesn’t want to rush you and neither do I” Azriel said.  
“I get a say, you’re MY mate” Sanarie said.  
“Yes, you do get a say' Azriel, placed his hand on Sanarie’s side and said “How is your wound?”   
Sanarie eyed him with a raised chin to say ‘I see what you’re doing, placating me and changing the subject’. She let him win for now, if for no other reason than because she was too spent “I’m not in any pain, just dizzy and exhausted. What happened exactly, where are my babies” Sanarie said, holding her head to try and stop the room from spinning because of the dizziness.  
“Your body is still replacing your blood, the best place for you is in bed with Atticus to rest. Alistair is with Mor, she will protect him until it’s safe to fetch them, god help the fool who tries to get past her to hurt our child” Azriel said, then gingerly picked Sanarie up from the table and carried her up stairs, he kept looking at her the entire way; watching her breathing, listening to her heartbeat, all he wanted was her, in his arms, in his bed, all to himself, for time without end.  
When Azriel entered the bedroom where he sensed Atticus was, he found Elain reading to him propped up in a huge bed, as he held his Illyrian Warrior and sucked his thumb, Lucien was by the window, surveying the street, up and down each side, checking rooftops, metal eye whirring and then sweeping again, and again. Elain saw Azriel before Atticus and she put her finger over her lips and drew the four posters curtain then said “you duck under the covers, and when Uncle Lucien says “Fifty” you can come out and find me okay, no cheating, I’ll know” she gave him a serious look, Atticus nodded at her, as she pulled the covers over his head, Lucien without taking his eye from the street, began to count. Azriel was relieved, Atticus was fine, it was as if nothing had happened, otherwise Elain would never play a game with him, not an active one anyway, she would risk his wing no more than he.  
Elain ushered Azriel into the bathroom and said quietly “You can’t let him see her like this, he’ll be traumatized”.  
“Like what, she’s his mother” Azriel said, he was so happy he wasn’t thinking, Elain shook her head at him, sensing his relief, his elation; clearly the bond had snapped and it was making his perception dampened, which was very unlike Azriel.  
“Blood covered Fairies may be something you’re used to seeing, but it’s not something Atticus is used to seeing, let alone a blood covered mother” Elain said, turning her head to the right, she looked at Sanarie then Azriel, and waited for the penny to drop.  
“Shit’ Azriel said, looking down at a blood covered Sanarie ‘thank you Elain, make sure he doesn’t come in here until I call for you” Azriel said, waking up a fraction from his elation, having felt what he knew was there from the moment he saw her eyes, the moment she’d sung for him, and every moment since; she was his mate and their bond had snapped into place. It was a high, a beautiful, natural high.


	17. Chapter 17

Azriel held Sanarie as Elain started her a bath, with bubbles and hand towels, for modesty’s sake, once she was done checking the water, she let it run and left, to let Atticus find her, leaving Azriel alone with Sanarie.  
Azriel surveyed her and her light wisps, as she leaned her head against him, exhausted from the ordeal, his shadows continued to dance with her light wisps; a mix of slow, trusting gentle, caresses, and brief, testing nudges, showing both the sure and uncertain feelings of their masters.  
Azriel searched for the tether inside himself which bound him to his mate, he found it wrapped around his heart, it was an unbroken shield of his dark shadows, something he’d felt before, but thought was a defence his subconscious had put in place to protect him. He felt the mass of his shadows and they whispered to him; ‘knower’...‘protector’, he followed his shadows and the tether moved towards Sanarie and disappeared, he still felt it, but in his mind it was invisible, he followed it and it became light. Around her heart was light and it whispered to him, as his own shadow had; ‘healer’...‘protector’. What was she? Lightsinger? Sunsinger? Lifesinger?  
Azriel tugged on the bond and Sanarie took a deep gasping breath, and looked up at him alarmed and confused.  
“Sorry, it’s our bond, if you feel that again, it’s just me, checking on you” Azriel said.  
“It felt' Sanarie said, thinking of the right words. It felt like he’d squeezed and tugged her heart ‘it felt like you touched my soul and pulled it towards you. If we have souls” Sanarie thought aloud.  
“I think we do, judging by what Rhysand, Amren and Feyre say, we exist once life is taken from our bodies” Azriel said.  
“That’s reassuring” Sanarie said.  
“Don’t you believe in the Mother” Azriel asked.  
Sanarie looked down and said “I believe in the strength of stone, it will stand and protect you and hour family for thousands of years and not let you down. It will be strong for you and hurt your enemies whether you wield it or use it as a shield. I believe in the stone of the Hewn City, it’s the only constant I ever knew, other than Korazsa. Keir spoke about stone all the time, perhaps it’s some lingering poison I’ll forever be stuck with. In here” she gestured to her head.  
“Nothing is forever. Good times never last, and nor do the bad, everything has its time, and its death. Even thoughts” Azriel said, trying to soothe her.  
“The bath is almost full enough, put me down and turn around” Sanarie said, she wasn’t quite ready for him to see all of her, through he’d seen her breast on more than one occasion already, thanks to Atticus’s need for comfort and a mother-bond with her. Azriel was about to see enough bathing her, even with bubbles and hand towels draped over her most private bits, seeing someone in their entirety, felt more exposed than she was ready for.  
“You’ll fall, you said you were dizzy down stairs, I doubt that’s changed, you need rest. I won’t look, I swear” Azriel said, not wanting to let her go.  
“Then put me down and hold out your hand, so I have something to grab if the dizziness overwhelms me” Sanarie said, honestly she’d felt close to this bad when she’d had serious head traumas from her fathers beatings, she would be fine, and he was right there. Sanarie thought that’d be how it always was from now on, he’d be right there, the thought made her feel warm and safe, it was something she had desperately needed for a long time.  
Azriel gingerly set her on her feet, on the rug by the bath, shut off the water and turned around; he closed his eyes and left his hand stretched behind his back.  
Sanarie’s light cotton sundress was heavy with blood, it was such a shame, she’d loved it as soon as she’d seen it. In the days she’d been at Azriel’s Mor had taken her measurements, from the shoe and clothes sizes she now knew for her sister, and filled her days waiting for them to re-emerge from his manor, with shopping and distraction at her townhouse with Nalum, plus reading about Bryaxis, which had turned up almost nothing to read and even less results.  
Sanarie let her dress fall to the floor and, left her undergarments with them, she held the side of the bath and climbed in, she sank beneath the bubbles and warm water, it was exactly what she needed. She put a hand towel over her chest and another over her upper thighs, and between those and the bubbles, felt comfortable “I’m modest, as modest as can be, naked in a bath” Sanarie said, smiling at her little joke, which eased the little bit of the nervousness left at the idea of him seeing her like this.  
Azriel turned around, smiled at her, before he saw her dress; it took some of the smile out of his face, it wasn’t white anymore, most of it was red with her and Atticus’s blood. He very nearly lost her today, his son very nearly lost his wing and ability for flight, it would have killed Atticus inside to lose that. If it hadn’t been for the mating bond high he was on, he wasn’t sure what he was capable of, if he’d unleashed himself upon Velaris to find the assassins who’d done this, he may well have hurt his people in the process. Azriel knelt and threw the bloody clothes into the bin, along with the expensive dainty under things, which were also blood stained, and very clearly picked by Morrigan.  
Sanarie moved closer to Azriel and leaned her arms on the side of the tub, tilting her chin up the way she did, when she wanted a kiss, Azriel chuckled and held her head in his hands, as he conceded to her wishes gladly.  
Between his kisses; “You’ Azriel said, ‘are’ he caressed her face, ‘perfect’ tucked her hair behind her ear and ran his thumb down her neck, ‘for’ he watched mesmerized, as in his periphery their light and shadows around them kept merging, and shattering into rainbow light rays, ‘me”. He closed his eyes, savoured kissing her deeply, for a long time and held her against him with one arm, while he washed her with the other. Azriel kissed her, as he dipped a sea sponge in the water and, drew lines up and down her back, slowly and gently, memorising the arches and plains of her body, he swirled around her hips, and up her sides to her shoulders, collarbone and neck. He felt her body tense in his arms, as she sighed a startled moan, he was shocked by what he’d done, he’d only been kissing her as he’d washed her, and okay his movement with the sponge had been languid and he’d kissed her with wanting, but no woman had ever released from such little attention.  
“Oh’ Sanarie sighed a whimper, she relaxed into his embrace because once he was done with her lips, and her body, she was weaker than before, from her mates careful ministering’s. She leaned her forehead into his chest and let him support her head. ‘What was that” she asked, no male had ever done that to her body, let alone with just a kiss and some gentle touch.  
“Just a very…’ Azriel searched for the words in his mind ‘Sincere, kiss” he said.  
“But it was like you kissed me everywhere” Sanarie said, into his chest.  
Azriel chuckled, that hadn’t been his intention, he hadn’t had any, he just wanted to hold her and kiss her, to show her how he felt, so she knew even if it was too soon to say, that she was deeply loved and cherished.  
“Aw, I shouldn’t have said that and I didn’t mean for my body to do that” Sanarie said, embarrassed, her body felt light and heavy all at once.  
“Shhh’ Azriel soothed her ‘lean on the tub, keep those flannels on for now, I’ll drain the water and then I can wash your hair” Azriel said.  
As Sanarie lent her head on the bath ledge, she saw, the light ruddy brown draining out of the bath, it was a lot of blood and the bath hadn’t even had her dress in it, she couldn’t fathom how she was alive.  
“I’m not looking I promise” Azriel said, as he tried to work as fast as he could to drain the water, her scent was torture, worse than it had ever been, only now with almost all the water drained away, she smelled not just like her, not only with his scent woven with hers, but; like a satisfied woman. He hadn’t meant to do that to her, he hadn’t even touched her lower than her hips or any area, which should have produced the results it did, she was so sensitive.  
“Can you hear that music” Sanarie asked, wondering if there was a party or festival in the street below.  
“No, but you’re very sensitive, so it wouldn’t surprise me if you could hear far away things that even I can’t” Azriel said, wondering how different and similar they were in power and ability. Azriel leaned over the tub turning the taps, to make sure before he put in the plug and more bubbles that the temperature was right.  
Sanarie sighed and said “Dizzy” she was exhausted, Azriel looked to her as he heard it in her voice, assessing if he could just put her in bed as she was. The few patches of dried blood in her hair were thick, she really did need those parts of her hair washed bare minimum. His eyes moved lower, he couldn’t help himself, and then he saw what he’d thought a possibility for days, what he’d tried so hard to deny to himself; that he’d forgotten all about it, because it was too awful to even contemplate. The deep scars on her back, perfectly aligned, deeper than he’d seen on anyone, more was taken than necessary, even if she’d been irreparably injured they should never have taken that much. No, it wasn’t just a necessary operation, she’d been butchered, he couldn’t deny it any longer, now that he saw with his own eyes, she was half Illyrian, not half mortal and someone had cut out her wings to the root, and then some. Azriel thought of her father, and knew, of anyone, Keir Darkbringer was capable of this mutilation, especially on his bastard Illyrian daughter.  
Fury rose in him unchecked, Azriel snapped his shadows around him, darker and thicker, until he was darkness itself, he turned and left, he heard Sanarie’s voice behind him “Azriel? Don’t leave me, please”. He had let that happen to her, with his incompetence. 500 years. He could have had his mate by his side for 500years, could have been protecting her for 500years, could have saved her wings, could have saved her mother and Korazsa. He had to get out, he had such a loose hold on his rage, and he couldn’t let it go in this house, someone he loved would get hurt.  
Moving fast through the house, he saw he would pass Mor with Alistair on the stairs, he couldn’t look at her; she had her face. He wanted to make someone bleed, to scream, the way Sanarie would have when they cut out her wings, because Keir wouldn’t have given her the mercy of being unconscious. It couldn’t be Keir he punished today, who he knew in his being was responsible, with his hate for Illyrian Fae, he’d endanger all of them if he went under that mountain with that darkness, because danger, injured or not, they’d rally and they’d come for him. Mor blanched as she saw Azriel approaching and winnowed herself and Alistair to the dining room, she crouched behind Rhys and Cassian, who were making plans on what to do with the 2 caught assassins, who had been incredibly easy to catch, Keir had sent emissaries he’d wanted to be caught that was clear, but why? Mor’s fear alerted Rhys and Cassian that something had gone very wrong; Azriel in his dark side, was the one thing Mor was terrified of.  
“Azriel” Rhysand asked, a terrified Mor who was clutching Alistair to her, so he didn’t have to see his Papa like this.  
She nodded and said “Worse than dinner, cold rage, he’s leaving” she said, unable to put a proper sentence together, childhood anxiety and flashbacks addling her brain.  
Rhysand put a hand on her shoulder and said “It’s okay, we’ll deal with this, take Alistair to Elain, she, Nuala and Cerridwen are looking after him, Lucien will protect them, while you see to Sanarie”  
Mor nodded, then all three looked up, as a singing voice sounded through the house, it was beautiful, and changed musical lilts a little with every few words, which did not sound like any language they had heard before. It was Sanarie, her voice became fevered before it turned into a wailing despaired note, Mor looked up and then to Rhysand “Go” he urged, Mor and Alistair disappeared immediately.  
Rhysand and Cassian reached the door way as Azriel passed them in the entry hall, his darkness undulated around him, something was very wrong, and Sanarie was in no condition to tame him as she had last time.  
“Azriel, stop” Rhysand said, a command not a request, calling Azriel to a halt before he could clear the entry hall through the front door.   
Azriel hadn’t seen them there; he’d been so focused on getting out.   
“Shit.’ Cassian exclaimed under his breath, when he saw Azriel ‘Az, what’s wrong” Cassian said, worry plain on his face, seeing Azriel’s shadows like this was rare, he was chaotic, and the breadth and force of his shadows, whipped around him and touched the room, moving anything not heavy enough to withstand the velocity of his shadows. Icy fury rippled off Azriel in waves, permeating the room with cold.   
Azriel turned to face them, looked slightly behind each of them to their wings, his shadows dropped as the power and energy drained from the room; revealing his anguished face, mottled fury, guilt and pain clashed there as he thought of the wings she should have too. He imagined her in the air and then saw her falling as she had that day, he thought about what she’d done when Atticus had been hit, she’d acted on a mothers instinct to save her baby, and when she reached him, she had flipped them in the air, wrapped his wings around his body and held them securely, protecting them from further harm, not just a mothers instinct; an Illyrian mothers instinct. Azriel bent over and emptied his stomach onto the floor, Rhysand and Cassian both exchanged incredulous looks, and made for Azriel.   
Azriel saw them coming, threw up his chaotic shadows again, his siphons flared putting a blue shield between them as well, then he ran, ran out of the townhouse, onto the street and launched himself straight into the sky.   
Rhysand and Cassian followed Azriel into the sky, he winnowed before they could reach him.   
“The cabin?” Cassian asked, throwing out a hand to Rhysand ready to be winnowed.   
Rhysand nodded and replied “let’s pray he’s anywhere but the Hewn City” and took Cassian’s hand, they had to find him, last time Azriel had been like this was after he’d found Morrigan, when her father had tortured and butchered her for sullying herself with Cassian. A decision which saved her a lifetime of belonging to Eris Vancerra Heir to Autumn, and being his personal prize mare, for siring his own heirs; her father had dumped her on the Autumn Court boarder, after he was done punishing her savagely, with a note nailed to her stomach. Azriel had found her and the only thing that stopped him from going, and killing Keir then and there; was when Rhysand vowed to Mor that the rights to say if Keir and her Mother lived or died, were hers. Rhysand’s quick thinking made it so that Azriel had to ask her permission, and he would never do anything she didn’t want, especially after seeing what was done to her. All she had said was “Not yet”, because the First War with Hybern had been almost won, and they’d needed Keir’s Darkbringer Warriors to finish it.


	18. Chapter 18

Rhysand and Cassian stood just outside the winnowing zone around the Cabin, but there was nothing, no scent, no movement, they ran inside and scouted the whole house, Azriel had not come here, Rhysand and Cassian both prayed he had not gone to The Hewn City.   
“Lord Devlin's War Camp?” Cassian asked, Rhysand nodded in reply and grabbed his shoulder, to winnow them to the one place Azriel was sure to get the fight he was spoiling for, without also causing the world of trouble.  
Rhysand winnowed them into the centre of the camp, deep in the Northern Mountains, cool even in the height of summer. Yelling and screams of pain were coming from the training rings, Rhysand and Cassian launched themselves into the air, and as they surmounted the ridge above the training rings; they saw with horror, Azriel fighting Lord Deviln and nine of his biggest and best warriors, horror not for Azriel, but for the damage he was inflicting on everyone else. 4 or 5 were already being taken away bloody and crying out in pain, as they dove for the training ring, they watched as Azriel was a moving blur of shadow, blue siphons and flashing blades, disappearing and reappearing, cutting, kicking, punching, with his limbs and his power, blue light flared within his dark mass as he flared his power, they landed either side of Azriel, cracking the stone floor of the ring. Azriel threw out his power and pushed Rhysand and Cassian back, they bent into a crouch trying to stay upright with the force of Azriel’s power.   
“LEAVE, NOW” Rhysand yelled, the commanding snarl ripped from his throat, he didn’t dare take his eyes from Azriel in this volatile state.   
“You need to leash your hell hound Rhysand” Lord Devlin said, he spat blood on the observing steps of the ring and Azriel surged for him, Rhysand knocked Azriel back with a shield of power.   
“I SAID LEAVE” Rhysand said again, this time talons slid out from his fingers, and his own darkness ripped out around him. He tipped the dark tendrils, in his misting power and lashed them out towards Deviln’s face, raking three lines down his cheek, he misted the skin and flesh away, enough to leave him permanently disfigured. Devlin would never forget what will happen, if he ever disobeys his High Lord again.   
Cassian carefully circled Azriel, trying not to draw his attention, Devlin was too injured to move of his own accord and his men stood at the top of the sunken, training ring stairs, too terrified to come any closer. Azriel saw Cassian moving and made for him, but Rhysand was faster, he grabbed Azriel and threw him back, they battled whilst Cassian took the injured Lord Devlin by the back of his Illyrian leathers and picked him up, clean off the ground, walked him the few short steps up to his men, so they could take him bloodied and broken in places, to the healers. Cassian threw Lord Deviln to his men and said “You’re lucky we got here when we did. You’re also lucky it was only your face which got misted, it may well be your entirety next time” Cassian said, his contempt for Devlin’s disobedience plain on his face. There would be no apologies for Azriel’s behaviour, the Night Court territory was protected by the strongest Inner Court in the history of Prythian, and sometimes, that came with a price, one which they’d rarely paid. Be it Amren, Rhysand, Morrigan or Azriel, they’d all blown a top with their power once or twice, it was part and parcel of having power and it didn’t happen often, so Deviln or whomever copped it, could suck it up. Besides which, if his best men were this sloppy, and couldn’t even handle an unfocused power, they needed the reminder of what real power in battle can do, this was a start.  
“Your turn” Rhysand said, over his shoulder to Cassian.   
Cassian walked past Rhysand, red siphons flaring he created a red shield around himself and held a dagger in each hand, facing Azriel “Az, brother, you in there?”   
A dampened roar sounded from inside the shadows, he undulated and moved like smoke, Cassian kept himself shielded and only dropped it when he knew without doubt he would strike true; drop shield, stab in Azriel’s thigh, not deep, never deep enough to mame, just enough to injure and slow him down. Drop shield, slice, behind the calf, sidestep, whirl, it was a graceful dance watching Cassian, calculated and yet fluid at the same time, and one Azriel was losing in his unfocused, raging state. Drop shield, punch, dislocating Azriel’s shoulder, Azriel bellowed in pain. Drop, cut, into Azriel’s other shoulder, roll, side step, feint, drop shield, slice behind his other calf, that last slice dropped Azriel, stopped him from moving, but his shadows still undulated around him and he roared again in fury and pain. It shook the mountain. Azriel dropped his shadows a little, and Cassian feinting a strike with one dagger clutched in hand, used the hilt of the other and uppercut Azriel straight through his lessened shadows and landed the blow to his face, Azriel sprawled on the ground spitting blood. Truthteller on the ground before him, Cassian kicked away the blade and threw out his red shield to stop Azriel summoning the blade back to him, he could have it back when he’d calmed down. Cassian turned to Rhysand and said “you wanna take it from here?”, Rhys nodded to him and stepped towards Azriel.   
“Azriel, talk to me, tell me what’s going on” Rhysand said, trying to soothe the rageful Shadowsinger.   
Azriel dropped the shadows almost completely and slowly looked up at Rhysand, blood in his face from Cassian’s well placed blow he looked savage, deadly, he growled “Give me your permission to end Keir Darkbringer, however I see fit”   
“You know I gave Mor that honour, when I appointed her third in command 500 years ago, if you want Keir, it’s her permission you need, not mine. I do however as your High Lord forbid you to enter the Hewn City alone and without my express permission, it’s not safe, not even for you, you know this Azriel I believe that’s why you came here instead. Why do you want him dead now, specifically” Rhysand said.   
“Keir butchered her back, he is the reason she is crippled, I’m sure of it” Azriel said, in the low dangerous tone, which had yet to leave his voice.   
“Are you sure? I think he would have sold Sanarie to a High Lords son, not an heir, but still, someone would have had her, the power from that line, whether he assumed it was dormant in her or not, would likely still pass to her children. He wouldn’t have crippled her if he could gain something from it” Rhysand said.   
Azriel laughed so heartily at Rhysand’s words, he sounded maniacal at the whole notion “Keir would never have even considered marrying her off. She was too young to remember being butchered, but I know it was him and I know why. She has big power Rhysand, my spy was clearly wrong about that and her parentage, half of it anyway” Azriel said, bitterly, blood still dribbling out of his nose, slowing now, if he’d only known, he could have saved her 500years ago, maybe even saved her wings.   
“He butchered her as a child?” Rhysand asked.   
“As a baby or toddler I suspect, most likely the former” Azriel said.   
“Shit. Even for Keir that'd be twisted, surely a baby couldn’t survive that, are you sure?” Cassian asked.   
“Haven’t you guessed yet? She’s Illyrian, did you never notice how her hunch starts where an Illyrian females wings should be? She wasn’t whipped to within an inch of her life, she didn’t suffer a break in her back bone, or a surgery to save her; Keir cut her Illyrian wings from her back, to the root and then some” Azriel said, looking more like himself as guilt and sadness started to take the place of rage. She would never fly, never glide beside him, never know the freedom of flight, never help him teach their younglings to fly, never play with Alistair or Atticus in the sky. Every realization had culminated in that one moment as he’d lent over the bath and surveyed her back, the moment he’d seen her back, he’d known what those scars meant, known he’d shut out the idea after he’d felt the indents in her back as he soothed her against him in the library. Seeing the scars, realizing the truth he’d shut out from himself, it had broken him utterly and he needed to fight and rage, to be even a little okay.   
“Shit” Cassian and Rhysand said in unison, watching the anguish on Azriel’s face intensify.   
“I suspected since the day after she arrived, but prayed I was wrong, tried to forget what I felt beneath her clothes. As soon as I saw how deep her scars ran, I knew she’d had wings, and that they were cut out to the root. My mate, is half Illyrian, she is supposed to have wings, and they were cut out so young, so ruthlessly, and so deep, it crippled her for life. She should be dead, I’ve watched as grown Lesser Fae, and Illyrian Fae had their wings cut out after battle and not survive. In that moment I knew I had failed her, I don’t deserve her; I should have saved her 500 years ago. I wanted Keir to pay, but I knew I couldn’t go there, so I came here” Azriel forced the words out of himself, speaking to the ground, one scarred hand braced in front of him on the stone, the other dislocated in his lap.   
“She doesn’t know she’s Illyrian that secret kept her alive and safe in the Court of Nightmares, but she is here now and still doesn’t know. Go back and tell her, you do deserve her Azriel, you always expected more of yourself than is possible to give. She needs you now more than ever” Rhysand said.   
“I can’t look at her, I failed her, I should have stalked Keir 500+ years ago, cloaked in darkness. I should have followed him until I learned every secret he had, should have done it all myself, he would have revealed her, and I could have saved her, maybe even before she was butchered” Azriel said, breathing quick short breaths, the guilt was crushing him from the inside out.   
“Azriel you were likely still fighting Hybern, still working for my father when she was born, there’s nothing you could have done. Recovering from that war had been harder even than the second time round, we were still young then, do you not remember how long it took for the nightmares to end? How long it took to rebuild and feel somewhat normal again. Azriel, there was nothing you could have done, least of all to save her wings” Rhysand said, trying to reason him out of guilt.   
Morrigan appeared at the top of the sparring ring stairs “You stupid prick. Do you know what I walked into after you fucked off and left your mate; she was singing-screaming in the bath smelling of sex, what the fuck did you do to her? Why the fuck would you leave her when her power looks like yours, except light instead of shadow? Madja had to give her a sleeping potion because she couldn’t stop screeching, I’ve never seen anything like it”. Morrigan was shaking, when she’d touched Sanarie’s arm something had happened, and Sanarie’s song had changed, the first tugged at her heart strings, when it changed it hurt, painful memories flashed through her as her sister sang, old wounds had been felt like the day they’d been given, until she’d managed to let go. Sanarie had screamed for Azriel then, and he hadn’t come. Sanarie lay crying and singing, and Morrigan next to her on the floor, both traumatized, Madja had given Sanarie a sleeping tonic and Mor a few shots of rum.  
“Sanarie is half Illyrian Morrigan, not half human” Rhysand said, as if in explanation.   
“Bullshit” Mor said, fury plain on her face, unable to use her truth powers dampened by her rage and shaken to her core, what had her sister done to her, what had she done to her sister?   
Rhysand thought if she’d shown up 15minutes ago she and Azriel could have gone head to head and both got their anger out their systems.   
“Her hunch starts where an Illyrian females wings should be, think of Feyre and her wings” Cassian said, trying to make Mor see what they were dealing with, so she’d calm down.   
“Shit’ Mor said, as Cassian’s words hit her and she thought of her sisters posture and Feyre's back and wings, it pushed her out of her fury ‘she’s Illyrian and our father didn’t kill her” Mor said, dumbfounded by that realization.   
“It’s a miracle she’s alive, he took her wings stem and root, and then some, judging by the deep scars I saw. She can’t remember having wings, can’t remember having them cut out, she thinks she’s half human, everyone in that court does” Azriel said.   
“My father would have never touched an Illyrian woman” Mor said.   
“If she like Sanarie had her wings taken, before Keir met her, he could have assumed her human” Cassian pointed out.   
Mor sat down on a stair, “if she’s half Illyrian, half High Fae, what is she” Mor asked quietly, thinking about what she’d witnessed and experienced.   
“I don’t know, she certainly doesn’t know” Azriel said.   
“We’ll find out, someone or some book has to know” Rhysand said, thinking of his second in command, he’d fetch Amren as soon as he was done here.  
“She needs Siphons” Mor said, if she was Illyrian and what Mor experienced with her was her inability to control her power, she’d need Siphons.  
“They may not work on her, she’s half me and half you Morrigan, they may not work, as they don’t with Rhysand” Azriel said.  
“Fucking Mother. So we just leave her asleep and doped up on sleeping tonic until we figure out how to handle her?” Mor said, not feeling it was good enough, but the only potential solution.  
“Azriel, are you going to try and kill anyone else?” Rhysand asked, feeling like he may be okay to leave now. They needed Amren, she may know what Sanarie is, what her powers mean and how they control them, plus he needed his second, he was now at war within his own court.   
“Not yet, I have to ask permission first” Azriel said, looking at Mor.   
She inhaled, looked at Azriel and said “when we go to war with Keir, and we take our armies to decimate him and his Darkbringers, once Sanarie and I are done with him, you can take him, wherever you like, and do whatever you want with him for as long as you like, take the next five centuries if you wish, as long as he’s dead to me, and I never have to see or hear from him again, I don’t care. You have my word, but you also need my sisters, because she deserves a say in his fate, more so than even I do” Mor said.   
Azriel nodded, looked down and let the salty pain drip from his eyes.  
Cassian walked to him, put one arm around his back and another under his shoulder, as he hauled him to his feet he said “I get why you came here, it was a better option than going straight for Keir, but Devlin, Mother knows what he’ll try to get it of this, unless Rhysand sufficiently scared him to silence”.   
Azriel grunted as he walked supported by Cassian, and summoned Truthteller to his hand, he sheathed the blade then turned to Cassian and said “Don’t you ever, kick my blade again, you little shit”   
Cassian snorted a laugh and said “Healers tent, then we’ll get you back to Sanarie”   
“No, I’m staying here for a few weeks” Azriel said.   
“No you’re not” Mor said and winnowed in front of Azriel.   
“After today I need some time, and by what you’ve said, I’ve already hurt her, so I doubt she wants to see me either, even when you figure out a way to have her awake” Azriel said.   
“You cold bastard. If you witnessed her singing that wailing scream, crying her eyes out feeling Mother only knows what. Lying in that bathtub, smelling like sex and fallen probably where you left her’ Mor watched as those last words did indeed strike true and he closed his eyes regretfully; he had left her exactly there, ‘you wouldn’t say that. You’d let one of us winnow you back there like this, so you could explain to her what you know. I’m pretty sure, whatever she is, is dampened by your power, you protect her Azriel, just being there. She didn’t start singing, and screaming, and crying, and being overwhelmed until you left her. And telling you now Azriel, I will not tell her she’s Illyrian, I will not tell her she should have wings, I will not tell her our father cut them out of her back, that’s on you, you’re Illyrian, you’re her mate, you know what it is to have wings, so you can explain why you ran when you realized who she was; After you fucked her in the bathroom”  
Azriel looked up and said “I didn’t make love to her. I didn’t mean to make her body do that, I only kissed her and washed her body, I swear”.  
“Go fuck the cauldron! You don’t accidentally make a female orgasm’ Mor’s anger rippled off her again as she stared down Azriel ‘insufferable mated fae male” Mor said under her breath, they were all the same, lost their goddamn minds when their bonds snapped.  
“Morrigan, take some deep breaths, when you’re calm ask Azriel again if he meant to do that to her, your truth power is hidden by your anger’ Rhysand held up his hands in a have mercy on mercy plea at her, before he said ‘which is justified, but only you can satisfy yourself that he hasn’t deliberately hurt your sister”  
Mor walked to Azriel and Cassian, grabbed Azriel’s dislocated arm he bellowed, but was cut off as she winnowed them back in front of the townhouse.   
“No” Azriel said, when he saw where they were and winnowed them back to the camp.  
Rhysand looked surprised to see them, when they appeared in front of the healers tent, before they disappeared, and a few moments later reappeared.  
“Cauldron boil me, the two of you, stop it” Cassian said, pushing Mor away, when they manifested one last time.  
The Morrigan, looking fierce as hellfire, grabbed Truthteller from Azriel’s belt, he looked at her incredulous, no one should have been able to take that blade from him, that was part of its power, and she just took it, like she was plucking a leaf from his leathers. Morrigan held it to his chest, projecting her truth power, through the Truth blade and into him as she spoke “Azriel go back to your mate, I can’t look after her, after what I said I’ve witnessed with her, can you not see; the only person she’s safe with is you. Go back to my sister NOW” Mor finished, then returned Truthteller to Azriel’s belt.  
He let go of Cassian and unsheathed Truthteller, “This is yours, it belongs with you, draw the truth from the assassins lips” he let go of the blade and disappeared.  
Rhysand and Cassian looked at Morrigan and Rhys said “I’ve never seen you do that”.  
“I vowed to myself I’d never compel someone against their will, but fuck it, and fuck him, someone has to make him get out of his own way. I won’t allow him to hurt her, so to hell with that vow” Mor said.  
Cassian exhaled, it was a hell of a day, and not even past morning yet.  
“I’m going to get Amren from Summer, I need my second now that we’re at war, and we need to know what Sanarie is so we can help her, and Amren may know what she is” Rhysand said.  
“I told you she’d be back within the week” Cassian said.  
“Just go deal with the assassins” Rhysand said, shaking his head.  
“Where am I winnowing to?” Mor asked Cassian.  
“Velaris, Barraks. They’re underground, being guarded and yes, the townhouse is being guarded too. I commanded the guards to be incognito, so they don’t alarm anyone” Cassian said, to Mor and then Rhys, so he could travel to Summer and not worry about his mate or any other member of his family.


	19. Chapter 19

Amren had spent the morning with Varian, they’d more than made up for the few months they were apart, but it had been a few days and Amren couldn’t keep him in bed, or to herself any longer. So she lounged on a chaise out on the balcony of their rooms, drinking red wine, which was infused with some fresh lambs blood. As it had turned out, she still retained some of her characteristics from before she burned out her grace on Hybern's army, and in the place of some other powers, new gifts emerged. Amren didn’t need only blood to survive, at first she’d hated food and her new need to eat it, yet it didn’t have the stench it once did. She actually enjoyed eating now, in fact she’d grown a healthy little behind and some softer edges, which Varian loved as much as he did her. These curves were thanks to her son Tao, a jet black baby fruit bat, given to her by Varian.   
For a while after the war adjusting to her new body had been hard, she’d been wasting away, moving from feeding on blood, which she’d only needed every few days, to needing food; everyday, multiple times a day, it'd been tedious and tiresome, she hadn’t bothered with it. Amren had just kept to her usual routine; fresh lambs blood every few days, but her body was made anew by her death and resurrection, and she could not carry on as before. Countless millennia was impossible to forget, in all that time she’d either not needed sustenance at all, or only needed blood every few days, so even though in the back of her mind she knew she should eat, she would forget.   
She had slowly been starving away and become vicious at times, she’d become despondent to living, and trying to cope with being “normal”. Having the full range of a living beings emotion for the first time, not knowing what to do with it, and wanting to shut the world out in a hope to avoid it, she didn’t eat and tried not to feel, which only made her feel worse. She had always been a recluse by nature, and being away from Rhysand, Feyre and the others on the first try of living in the Summer Court, had not been a good idea. It was too soon for such big change; especially because she was not only adjusting to a new court, but also learning to be Fae without her family. Rhysand, Feyre, Mor, Azriel, Cassian, they understood her best, knew how to handle her and had felt their fair share of emotional turmoil, or confusion and survived it. Varian understood her, gave her space when she needed it, saw her spiral down into despondency, and got her a baby bat, that needed her mothering without his own bat mother, as much as she needed him. Varian made sure she wasn’t alone, knew that she’d be needed and loved, because he couldn’t be around all the time, she didn’t want him around all the time, and she needed to be pulled out of her melancholic state. Varian had come back one day, with a small black baby bat, as he’d suspected, she took to him immediately, he couldn’t imagine Amren taking to a fluffy black puppy, but a black batpup, he had been a gift from the Mother. Tao’s black leathery wings, had made Amren adore him instantly, reminding her of the three baby bats she’d left behind, to Amren; Cassian, Rhysand and Azriel would always be her batpups, even if they were grown and she had wanted to eat them on more than a few occasions, just to shut them up.  
Tao held onto Amren's shawl with his claws, he used her right arm and shoulder as a roost, it was his favourite nook, Tao lounged on Amren’s, left arm and her shoulder, with his wing stretched across her back and the other moving back and fourth in a fanning motion, which he made when he was too hot. Being jet black, covered in fur and lounging in the sun was a short-lived activity, for Tao anyway. He screeched, asking Amren for the globe grape she was about to eat, she sighed, rolled her eyes and said “One for you Bubba, and one for Mama, then you need to go inside” she fed him a big red grape, and took another one for herself.  
Amren enjoyed her blood-wine and grapes, as she soaked up the mid morning sunshine, she would spend her day, enjoying leisure and pouring over books, which Tarquin had given her his blessing to take from the royal households library; it was extensive and held many old volumes.  
She enjoyed fruit as much as Tao did, although she enjoyed the fermented kind the most, especially when it had an infusion of liquid iron.   
The rope bell sounded at the door to her and Varian’s rooms, they weren’t the grandest rooms in the High Lords palace, but they were still very well appointed. Amren opened the tall glass doors to the patio, closed them and the heavy curtains as she passed through, it was far cooler inside and that suited Tao, so she always tried to keep it that way. She stopped by his habitat, which was far from the windows, and the heat, helped him inside, he gladly lay down on his soft cool bed. Amren had it commissioned specially for him, unlike regular bats, his upbringing with his indulgent mother had taught him how to be more Fae than Bat. His fruit bowl was almost empty, but the bushels of flowers Varian had pushed into the side of his habitat, which held nectar; a favourite of Fruit Bats, were still laden with untouched flowers. In keeping Tao fed and happy Amren had done well with the bat, Tao had needed caring for after his mother had flown onto one of Varian’s ships, failing in the heat of her migration, her baby had been saved, but there had been nothing they could do for the mother, it was then Varian felt this baby bat was a gift from the mother, for Amren. Tao had in turn saved Amren’s life, being a constant loud reminder that he and she needed to eat, she’d shared food with him, and learned to enjoy it. As a Bat-rearing mother however, she’d failed utterly; Tao was Fae, just try and tell him otherwise. He slept lying sprawled on his bed, sometimes on Amren’s, had no idea that he could hang upside down and whilst he could fly; he couldn’t fly well. He crashed into things and had been so poor at it that they’d had to remove the curtains from the bed, and the four posts they’d hung on, and everything else he could fly into or become tangled in. Walking into their rooms finding Tao caught in the bed curtains, breathing fast, distressed and unable to free himself, once, had been enough.   
Amren sniffed the air to see who was outside the internal doors to her rooms; Rhysand. It hadn’t even been a week, something had to be wrong, he wouldn’t be here otherwise.  
“What now” Amren asked, looking as if she knew what was coming, which was all but confirmed when she saw Rhysand standing at her door looking like he regretted being there.  
“Sanarie and Atticus were shot out of the sky, just outside the house of wind” Rhysand said, he wasn’t able to finish because Amren interrupted him.  
“So Keir Darkbringer has declared war, using his own daughter, he must hate Sanarie more even, than Morrigan, if that’s even possible” Amren said.  
“You’re right, it was a declaration of war. And it is very possible, as she’s half High Fae and half Illyrian Fae, not half Mortal as we were wrongly led to believe, given how much Keir hates the Illyrians I’d say, there’s a good chance. She has powers, too, we don’t know what she is but she’s like Azriel, different but the same. All that aside, Sanarie jumped from Azriel’s arms to catch Atticus, and he was holding them both, the arrow could well have been for Mor and Sanarie intercepted it when she jumped, we’re not sure when she was hit or who it was intended for” Rhysand said, trying to appraise Amren as quickly as possible.  
“What did the declaration say” Amren asked, waving her hand inviting Rhysand inside.  
“The Ruling Sovereign of the Hewn City; hereby makes the declaration of war on the people of Velaris & their Court of Dreams. Citizens of the Nightmare Court, and her Darkbringer Warriors, stand by the rightful King of Night, Keir Darkbringer’ Rhysand said, trying to keep a lid on his anger, he walked to Tao's habitat and scratched under his chin, the way he liked, it calmed him however minutely to pet the little guy ‘how’s my favourite Batphew?”  
Amren smiled, proud of her Batling, he was a biter when she had first got him, but now she’d taught him to do gentle love bites only; for the most part anyway. Amren registered what Rhysand had said, turned to him and said “Wait, did you say; King? Keir has never met a king, let alone seen one in the Mirror” Amren said.  
Rhysand tilted his head in agreement and said “He burned the declaration into an Ash Arrow, and had it shot through Atticus’s wing”  
Amren stilled imagining if it was Tao shot in the sky “He used a child” Amren said, fury rising in her as she watched Rhysand scratch her baby bat.  
“A baby, he’s so small he’s basically a baby” Rhysand said.  
Amren's face darkened and she said “If we can’t end this quickly, it will be worse than with Hybern”  
“I know, this time it’s personal, the cost to our people will be high if we cannot end it quickly. It’s why I need to ask you to come back’ Rhysand said, he pulled a diamond necklace from one pocket and showed it to her ‘can I tempt you, my beloved second, my huntress, my terror in the dark?”  
Amren couldn’t take her eyes from the diamonds as she said “So Keir knows we took his daughter” Amren said, stating a fact whilst she rolled it all around in her mind, Varian, Tao, Night Court at war, another different-singer, she’d have to go back, and she wanted those dazzling diamonds.  
Rhysand breathed out and said “Yes, although there are things he doesn’t know, like the fact that she has a mating bond with our Illyrian Shadowsinger”  
“Suspected, mating bond” Amren corrected Rhysand, as she plucked the diamonds from his hand, unable to resist any longer. She cared for Varian, wasn’t sure how, it was very confusing having these complex emotions, but Rhysand and Night would always come before Summer.  
“Actually, Azriel was right about that, it snapped this morning, I have a lot to catch you up on. Is that a yes” Rhysand asked, after she’d taken the diamonds, slightly amused by the insanity of it all, one week hadn’t even passed.  
“That’s a yes to the diamonds, a maybe to the coming back” Amren fastened the sparkling diamond collar around her neck. Varian may well tie her to his bed when he found out Rhysand needed to take her back, but he’d let her go, she wouldn’t give him a choice, and besides Amren didn’t think anything could bind her, not for long anyway.  
Rhysand started searching his pockets as if he’d lost something “Now where could I have put that, oh that’s right’ Rhys held out his hand and summoned the smaller version of the necklace he’d gotten Amren, as soon as it appeared he said ‘I got Tao one too, second?’ Amren reached for it, but Rhys held back his hand and said ‘Huntress, terror in the dark?”  
Amren scowled at him, for knowing her so well, and teasing her with sparkly pretties, she kept the glare as she said “Fine, but I want a bigger apartment, somewhere which smells pretty and has lots of fresh fruit nearby”.  
“Done and done” Rhysand said, he had his second back, he’d have to deal with Varian and Tarquin sooner or later, but they’d understand, they knew Keir and neither of them, nor any other court in Prythian wanted him in Rhysand’s place; except possibly Beron, High Lord of Autumn, Rhysand could imagine an unholy alliance between those two, he’d have to organize a meeting with Eris, perhaps they could overthrow Beron before Keir could even suggest any alliance.  
Rhys watched as Amren took the smaller necklace to Tao, the fact that the bat kept nudging the hand the diamonds were in and pushed his head into the thing, when she opened it near his face, said enough about Amren as a mother, he chuckled and said “He really is your child, does he even know he’s a bat?”  
Amren walked back to Rhysand, punched his arm as gently as she could and said “No, he doesn’t, and thank god otherwise he might behave like his uncles' Amren waited while Rhysand laughed hard at her quip of he and Cassian, because she certainly didn’t mean Azriel, then she continued ‘Wine, cheese and fruit, whilst you brief me”.  
He and Amren went outside, leaving Tao in his habitat, Rhys gave her all the major points, and after hearing it all, she said “So it begins again, more war, it never ends”.  
“No, but I didn’t expect it again so soon, and not from Keir, that was my mistake” Rhysand said, he was heavy hearted, he knew the only way Keir could take the Night Court properly, was if he killed, Rhys, Mor, Feyre and Sanarie, there would be no one for the power of the High Lord to pass to, but Keir. It had never passed to a female before, not in any court, but no court had ever sworn in a High Lady, the power might recognize any of the females in his blood family, or his mate, any possibility was more terrifying than the last, they were each powerful in their own right, to add to that the High Lord of Nights power, he wondered if it would burn them out, or corrupt them. At the very least, it would be a way for Keir to convince other courts to join him, no court wanted the balance of power to be in anyone’s favour, with all the powerful Fae in his Inner Court, all of whom were loyal to him alone, that was bad enough, but to have one of those formidable females power increase exponentially was a terrifying prospect for the other courts. Hell his full blood Illyrian General and Shadowsinger, were more powerful than some High Lords, if not most; the females of his court were even more so, and now they had another great power added to their court, their family, and Cauldron only knew how that news would be taken. The more he thought of the possibilities of this war, the more trouble he realized they were in, but better to suspect than be shocked, which got them into this mess in the first place.  
“We will win, together, like we always do” Amren said, patting his shoulder reassuringly, as she watched his mind roll over his face, she filled his wine again, he looked like he needed the extra drink.  
“Do you have any idea what Sanarie is” Rhysand asked, he had only experienced a small bit of Sanarie’s power, been appraised by Madja as to what she’d witnessed, before it all turned, but even from that, without seeing her, maybe Amren knew what Sanarie was.  
“Maybe, I can’t say it out loud, I can’t believe it could be what I suspect, there hasn’t been one in millennia, let alone at the same time a Shadowsinger was in the world, and certainly not mated to one. If she’s what I suspect Rhysand together they can bend reality, time, space, they could send me home if I wished it. IF she is what I think she is” Amren said.  
Rhysand looked at her, he couldn’t fathom what she’d said, but at the same time, after everything he’d seen, he couldn’t dismiss it either “If she’s, a something-singer, she together with Azriel can cross into other worlds” he asked.  
“Open portals to other worlds, and I’d say yes, likely walk there themselves, although I’m not sure on that part, IF, I can’t be sure until I see her” Amren said.  
Rhysand whistled, then said “what other insane power is going to weasel its way into my court, other than you, my little terror”.  
“I may be little, but as you said, I am terrifying” Amren said, flashing Rhysand a smile and with it her elongated canines.  
“So, should we leave incognito, or should we talk to Tarquin and Varian” Rhysand asked, wondering how Amren wanted to manage her exit. This was her home now too, it was her male she was leaving, and she was his second, she deserved the right to decide how they left.  
“You write a letter to Tarquin, I’ll write one for Varian and we’ll leave quietly” Amren said.  
“Kidnap it is” Rhysand said, magicing a letter into his hand, the letter to Tarquin which he’d prepared, in case he was indisposed, he was going to put it into Varian’s hand’s, but leaving it inside the palace for him would do.  
Amren shook her head and said “always thinking ahead, devilish schemer”  
“Thank you, Oh, Great and Terrifying Huntress of the Night” Rhysand said, as he bowed to her and this time she playfully punched him, but without pulling her blow.  
She shrunk a sheepishly, when Rhysand winced and it wasn’t feigned in jest, she said “I’m sorry, still getting used to it”  
“What are you now” Rhysand asked, holding his arm.  
Amren shrugged and said “We didn’t know what I was before and we don’t now, but I can probably tell you what Sanarie is, so that’s something”  
Rhysand nodded and said “go get ready, so we can leave before someone notices I’m here”  
“I just need Tao’s Habitat and my jewellery box, everything else I have here, I also have in Velaris” Amren said, as she sat down to write a quick note to Varian. Rhysand walked over and set his letter beside Amren and she pointed to the trunk by her dressing table.  
“That trunk is your jewellery box” Rhysand said, highly amused.  
Amren turned and gave him a look, he magiced it between space and backed away a little, he was smiling and she soon turned back to finish her letter.  
Rhysand took Tao from his habitat and put him on Amren, then magiced the habitat away with the trunk.  
“Ready” Amren said, she stood, left the note and held Rhysand’s arm.  
Rhysand waited for Amren to say goodbye to the space, but she just looked bored.  
“You were always going to leave with me, I should have saved some money on those diamonds” Rhysand said, chuckling.  
Amren poked at him and said “Hurry up Batpup”


	20. Chapter 20

Azriel manifested in the street, in front of the townhouse, on his knees, his body throbbing or stabbing in pain. He did not want to go in, but without him using his mind to command his legs, he stood, and took a step towards it, it hurt, but it was magical compulsion from The Morrigan; it could not be stopped. His adrenaline flooded his body, heart thumping, strength returning to him and a spike of anxiety at the unexpected, unwanted movement, he used it to take a few slow, strenuous steps backwards, forcing his legs to work, as much as it pained him, he tried to move back, then tried to winnow away, he folded space and when he reappeared he was at the garden gate.   
“Fucking Mother, so this is what she never spoke of from the war” Azriel said, loudly at first, then muttering to himself. He was fighting his will, and the will of The Morrigan’s truth power. She used the truth of his situation, Sanarie’s situation and now he had no choice, he was going back to her. He tried one last time to pull away from the gate, he managed two strenuous steps back, before the gate banged open towards the house and he was flung at it, as if a sling shot had hurled him towards it.   
Azriel hit the front door, hard, his forehead smashed a hole out of one of the stained glass panels, he slid down the door until he grabbed the handle and turned. The door opened and he stumbled inside, he was met with a startled looking Feyre in a dressing gown, she was likely shocked at the sight of him battered and bruised. She surveyed him, ascertained that he was hurting, but okay, then her expression turned amused as she looked at him, and said “Did you just collide with my front door, like a confused bird hits a window?”   
Azriel scowled at Feyre, it was a sisterly tease, he scowled through the pain, but he wasn’t angry about Feyre’s amusement, she could get away with murder after what she’d done for him.   
“Cauldron fuck me” Azriel said to himself, he’d never live this down. Feyre laughed so hard at him, she was breathless as he walked past her and he didn’t mind that, it meant she was okay, she saved his mate, gave more blood than she’d ever had to give before, to his female and son, and his High Lady was still okay, she was up, walking around, making jokes and laughing with abandon.   
He was more frustrated at the pain, at his inability to control himself, there was no resisting truth, he knew that now, knew he couldn’t resist Mor’s spell any longer, or whatever she’d done aided by Truthteller. He gave in to the pull, let Morrigan's Power force him up the stairs, to Sanarie.  
His exultation made Feyre laugh even harder, and as he left she called after him “Love you, I needed that, you can explain later why you forgot how far the door was from the street”   
“Ask Morrigan if you see her first” Azriel said, as he marched up the stairs, propelled by the hold of Morrigan’s truth magic.   
Feyre was intrigued and surprised by the revelation Azriel made as he disappeared up the staircase, had Mor used some of that power which no one ever saw, now she had to know what was going on, but she could wait. Azriel needed to be with his mate, asleep or not, they did not know if Sanarie’s powers transcended her conscious mind to her unconscious mind, and from what Madja had said by way of Mor, Azriel was a natural shield for her, so Sanarie likely needed him close.   
As he expected the magic carried him straight to Sanarie’s bedside, he leaned over the bed and kissed her lips, as she slept under the gentle aid of the sleeping tonic Madja had given her.   
Elain was sitting by the bed, reading with Atticus in her lap, he was asleep, thumb in his mouth for comfort, cuddled against his Auntie, a child’s book lay on the bedside table next to her, she set down her book on top; a volume on autumn flowers and herbs, likely deciding what to plant in the coming months.   
“Thank you, for watching over them” Azriel said as he looked at Elain.  
She nodded once with a smile to acknowledge Azriel’s words, then with a knowing look Elain said “She’s half Illyrian then”   
“Yes” was all he could bring himself to say, as his face darkened and he looked to Sanarie, he ran the backs of two fingers down her face, and left them on her cheek soothing back and fourth.   
She must have read him like a book with her seers-knowing, because Elain looked at him with compassion and said “She’s alive, she’s here, and she’s your mate, if things had happened in another time, she may not be alive, she may not have made it here and you may never have been able to feel the mating bond with her. Be grateful for what you do have, do not regret what you couldn’t change’ Azriel tried to argue with her on that point, but she held up a hand and continued ‘if you could have changed anything, it would have been done already, you didn’t, because you couldn’t. Do you really believe, that in a world where mates are predestined, that you found her at any time, other than when you were meant to?”   
Azriel looked to Elain, she was right, but it didn’t change the fact that his mate had suffered terribly and he felt he’d always had the power to change it, if he’d only known.   
“Don’t look at me thinking ‘but, what if; blah, blah, blah' I see it in your eyes and that won’t help her now, so let it go” Elain said, looking at him with a face that said she knew she was right and he should heed her advice, for his own good, and Sanarie’s too of course.   
“Fucking Mother” Azriel said, conceding defeat, as he eased down to the bed, he needed his shoulder popped back in, he didn’t feel as rough as he should though, and realized, whilst she wielded her magic against him, Morrigan had likely also aided him by healing his wounds. “Can you get Madja if she’s still here, lay Atticus on her chest under the covers, he’ll be happy there” Azriel said, without looking away from Sanarie.   
“She’s naked under there, Madja gave her the sleeping potion and then tended to Mor, when Mor could stand she left, looked like she wanted to kill you. Nesta and I put her in the bed, didn’t feel it was our place to dress her, I thought Mor would come back and do it, but maybe you can now you’re here” Elain said, explaining the mess he’d left them all to, when he lost himself to rage over what had been done to Sanarie, such irreparable damage.   
Azriel stood from the bed shakily, and said “Still, put him there, he’ll be happiest there; if you see him suckling at her chest, leave him, I know it’s not right, but he needs it for comfort, for a mother-bond with her, and she has it in her heart to let him”   
“Things happen because they’re meant, he was meant to be hers, Alistair is getting knife wielding lessons with Nuala and Cerridwen, he came in here and kissed and hugged her, then he was happy to go play, but Atticus wanted to stay close to her. What could be more right than need, than needs being met, than love which makes them possible, what could be more right than fate?’ Elain was in a vague state, while she rattled off words from some unknown place. She came out of it and really saw Azriel ‘Az, you don’t look well” Elain said, as she tucked Atticus into the bed, on Sanarie’s chest.   
Azriel thought she was right when he realized how hot he felt, and sweaty, he swayed and steadied himself on the head of the bed. “Poisoned blade” Elain said, she had entered a stilled trance-state again, but quickly came back to herself and hurried around the bed to Azriel.   
Azriel went and sat in a chair, he’d only gotten a few splotches of blood on the bed so far, but if he lay down completely, he’d make a real mess. Elain made sure Azriel was okay, before she left him and went to see if Madja was still around, she found Nesta and Feyre in the downstairs parlour “Is Madja still here?”   
“No she left, there’s more sleeping tonic in the kitchen, if Sanarie needs it” Feyre said.   
“It’s Azriel, he’s been cut with a poisoned blade” Elain said.   
“I’ll go get the healer” Nesta said.   
“Send one of the guards, there’s one in the backyard, we can spare him, good luck to anyone who tries to get past Nuala and Cerridwen, or Alistair for that matter. Lucien is out there too, so he can watch the rear” Feyre said.   
Nesta nodded and left, to delegate a new task, to one of the guards Cassian had sent to watch the house.   
Elain and Feyre went upstairs to help Azriel, until Madja arrived.   
He had already passed out by the time they got up there, Feyre’s eyes widened as she saw him, he was getting bad fast, he had already passed out “Try and wake him, I’m going to get Madja myself” Feyre said, she felt his forehead with the back of her hand, waved her hand removing his layers and leathers, hoping that him just being in black cotton under trousers, would help lower his temperature enough until she got back with Madja. She disappeared, leaving Elain to try and wake him.   
Elain walked to the window and threw it open, as she’d hoped there was a male with a clear warriors physique walking casually out of the front gate, not drawing attention, dressed in a relaxed fashion, but to a trained eye, packed with concealed weapons.   
“Guard’ Elain yelled down, to get his attention ‘then lowered her voice and continued ‘your High Lady just winnowed to the healer Madja’s, if you can winnow you may find her there and protect her” Elain left the guard to decide what he thought best, she closed the window to keep the cool inside the house and returned to Azriel. They weren’t under siege, the assassins had been caught, but they were now at war, and wolves had already made it inside the gate, they almost made it out of one war without losing anyone they loved, by the mothers grace they hadn’t lost too many and if they could help it, the wouldn’t lose any this time.   
Elain drummed her fingers gently on Azriel’s face and called his name, but he didn’t rouse, she walked to a side table and picked up a pitcher of water, poured a half tumbler and then walked back and threw it in his face, nothing. Elain looked around, she didn’t want to hurt him, but she felt he needed to wake up, her sight landed on his arm, it was dislocated “Well you kept that to yourself’ she mumbled to herself ‘sorry Az” she said, as she grabbed his shoulder and moved it, shaking him.   
He came to bellowing in pain, Atticus woke and started wailing, he realized he was on Sanarie and found her breast and suckled it, he cried, but buried his face into her and hugged her, though she couldn’t hug him back, unconscious as she was.   
“Go to him” Azriel said, trying to push Elain away with his uninjured arm.   
“He’s okay, he has his mother for comfort, you have to stay awake, stay awake for that” Elain said, and pointed to Atticus, who snuggled Sanarie’s chest, sniffling and saying a word over and over in a muffled voice, which sounded to Elain like ‘Mama’.   
Azriel looked at her, his vision was going blurry, he blinked to get her into focus, but couldn’t “Elain, everything is foggy”   
“Hang on, Feyre winnowed to get Madja, she’ll be back any” Elain didn’t finish, because Feyre, Madja and the warrior appeared in the hall behind Azriel’s chair, the guard it turned out, could winnow.   
Madja hurried in and took a piece of yellow root out of her pocket and shoved it in Azriel’s mouth “chew it and swallow bits as you can, no complaints, I surmise you only have your own temper to blame for your condition” Madja said, she was firm, letting the large Illyrian fae male know who was boss.   
“Thank you Mikol, you may resume your duties as General Cassian commanded” Feyre said, to the warrior in the hall, he bowed low to her and backed away, after a few backwards paces he turned and went down the stairs, back to his post in the backyard. Belatedly Elain realized Feyre had left so quickly, other than her magic she was unarmed, just in a nightdress and dressing gown, she was right to send the guard. None of them would be careless now, the year of peace and respite was over, they were at war once more and none of them planned on being taken to that mountain. They’d bring the war to Keir, on their terms, the Hewn City would be obliterated for their insubordination. When they were done with the Court of Nightmares, it’s people would never again challenge the rightful ruler of the Night Court, because there wouldn’t be any people left to do so.   
“Did you say Mikol? Chocolate hair and eyes?” Azriel asked.   
“Yes, that’s right” Feyre said, looking apprehensive, wondering if she should be on alert.   
“Good male, lives across the street with his family, has eyes for my teenage ward, Sorca” Azriel said.   
Feyre visibly relaxed, already carrying the fear and anxiety of war in her body, she’d have to remember to breathe and relax, save the fear and anxiety from when they were really warranted.   
“No talking, chew and swallow, then repeat, until that root is gone, or you’ll regret not getting it down in good time” Madja scolded Azriel.  
Azriel grunted at the healer, acknowledging his acquiescence to her command.   
“Ah, the offending cut, I can’t see any other wounds which are addled by poison, so you are lucky’ Madja surveyed the nick in Azriel’s side which was turning black, radiating out veins of poisonous black, the blade had only marginally cut him but that was all which was needed with a poisoned blade. ‘However even though I got here quickly, you’ll burn and ache for the next few days. And you' she turned to Feyre, whom Elain had ushered into her seat by the window, on the other side of the bed ‘will not give any more blood for a month, this one will live and have no ill-effects, other than a few days suffering” Feyre saluted and relaxed in the chair, as Elain fussed around her, making sure she had fresh cool water, a good book and a blanket. Elain understood Azriel was Feyre’s family, that she’d want to be close, for at least little while anyway.


	21. Chapter 21

Mor followed Cassian from his office, down the back stair case which was carved into the mountain, the barracks were accessed from a yard and stables inside the city. The wall stood between the city and the western sea, it connected to the northern & southern mountain ranges. The high position of the barracks, made for a good vantage point to survey the city, mouth of the Sidra, and the coastline of sea it spilled out into.  
They descended deep into the mountain, not straight down, the caverns they walked took the natural course through the caves of the mountain, which diverted and intertwined until you felt dizzy and disoriented. Morrigan had never been down this far, never needed to even visit this mountain, Cassian lead them past cashes of weapons, stores for the barracks, a mess for the warriors on duty, and still down they went. As they walked, a crevice opened up by the path to the cells, which were intermittently placed, some bridges crossed the crevice and made accessible the cells on the other side of it.   
Cassian pushed Mor between him and the wall of solid rock “Stay on that side, unless you’d like to be flown a ways” Cassian asked.  
“I’ll walk, I need to cool off before we interrogate them. If I’m worked up when we start I won’t be able to sense when they’re lying or telling the truth” Mor said.  
Cassian nodded and kept walking, he was unusually quiet for himself.  
“There aren’t any prisoners” Morrigan remarked, a little surprised that not one of the intermittent cells in the natural rock hollows, sealed by iron bars, had a single occupant.  
Cassian shrugged and said “Sometimes we have to pull a few drunken troublemakers from a seedy tavern in the rougher parts of town, but it doesn’t happen often. We put them in the cells and let them sleep it off, they’re released the next day”  
“What if they struggle on their way to their cells? You could lose your men to that fall” Morrigan said, peering around Cassian to see how deep it ran, as she suspected she couldn’t see the bottom.  
“They don’t, we give them a small cup of mead after we question them, put a knock out tonic in there, carry them to their cells, same thing is given with their breakfast, then we carry them out to a holding cell where they wake and are released into the barracks yard. Every prisoner is carried through my office; god help any drunk who wants to try and get past me, if they can even find their way out. No prisoner knows how to get down here or how to get out, if we ever actually needed to fill these cells, there’d be no escape”  
The path ahead ended and opened out into a sheer drop, two guards stood either side, but only Cassian, Azriel or Rhysand went past this point.  
“Heard anything out of them yet?’ Cassian said, addressing one of the warriors guarding the space beyond. The warrior stood still in the pose used to respect superiors in the Fae army, Cassian waved away the usual greeting, chin up, hands clasped behind his lower back, feet apart. The pose was that of submission, and no threat, with hands griping the arms behind the lower back, they could not quickly reach for a weapon, with the chin raised their line of sight was broken and they were at the superiors mercy, the feet apart showed their readiness to take action when commanded. Suffice to say none of the Illyrian Warlords gave Cassian this respect, but the warriors of Velaris gave Cassian the respect and adoration he rightfully deserved ‘At ease Sargent” Cassian was easy with his men, tough and made sure they were fit and trained for battle at all times, but personable and relatable, it was no wonder that between his prowess on the battlefield and his good nature as their commanding general, that he was beloved as he was.  
The man relaxed into a neutral stance; chin levelled and arms relaxed, as did the 3 men behind him, then he spoke “Nothing, not a peep since you left them down there”  
“Good, you are all relieved for now, no one but the Night Court Inner Circle is allowed down here, as you well know. Go take your break up in the sanctum, but keep an eye out, their third companion may still be lurking, may try to come after them, if they can do so without getting lost” Cassian said, finishing with a smile.  
“Thank you General, we’re at your disposal” the Sargent said.  
“Be sure to train after your break, if you’re not summoned back here by Azriel, Rhysand, or myself’ Cassian said, as he always did, making his expectations of them clear before they saluted him again; chins high, arms behind their backs and feet apart. ‘dismissed” Cassian said, the men relaxed and left immediately.  
The sanctum mess was the hall of rooms for guards on duty under the mountain, it was a space with a communal room for relaxation and eating, and small rooms for sleeping, plus a large room deeper behind the open mess hall filled with equipment for training. There was always a few warriors on duty in the mess; one for laundering uniforms, one for general maintenance and one in the kitchen.  
Cassian turned to Mor and offered her his arms, she rolled her eyes and jumped into them, Cassian lept into the large open chasm before them and glided down in a spiral.  
He landed on an outcropping of rock, two fae lights winked into life and a thick iron door was revealed. Cassian unlocked it, and walked in first, two males were tied up to a kind of human scaffold, and the walls were lined with knives and instruments, plus healing supplies and a sink.  
Morrigan raised her eyebrows at the torture chamber before her, Cassian turned his back to the Darkbringer males, so be could mouth to Morrigan ‘For show’ and pointed to the walls, though the males still appeared to be unconscious, with heads to their chests. Having prisoners come to, only to see walls covered in implements clearly used for torture, was a part of the usefulness of this room. Cassian generally found fear of pain and torture was better than torture itself, though he couldn’t deny the results of Azriel wielding his magical blade. Now Morrigan’s magical blade; Truthteller.  
Cassian walked to the sink and took a pale of water he’d placed there before he’d left the males to brief Rhysand, before Azriel ran and went rogue. He passed it to Mor, and took the other himself, they stood either side of the males, and threw the buckets in their faces, the water slapped them in unison, shocked breaths and cries came from the male before Mor, while Cassian’s captive remained limp.  
As the male before Mor opened his eyes, she plastered an amused grin on her face, as she unsheathed Truthteller and admired the blade before turning to the male and said “Hello, Darling”  
The male before her, smiled when his eyes cleared of water and he realized who stood before him “Hello Darling, indeed” he said with amusement, as he raised his chin to get a better look at her. His unkempt brown hair, freshly hacked off in places clearly in an attempt to look presentable, leaving big random clumps of hair matted together and other sections which flowed free, told Mor this male had a story and then she recognized him. Rage coiled up inside her, every bit of her wanted to plunge the knife straight into his heart, but they needed information, so she leashed herself stopped the shakiness which threatened to show and kept her grin plastered as she said “So, what can you tell me about my birthplace as it stands today? Secrets, court intrigues, the changed darkness which lies beneath the mountain?”  
The male looked her up and down with a lured expression, “I’d ask if it was you I fucked 300years ago, but you’re clearly not that crippled whore are you, Morrigan? I had you 500years ago, before your bastard sister had even been born; I must admit, it was worth getting locked up these past 300years, just to have the set” Handel spat at her, sickening amusement on his face.  
Cassian rounded the scaffold at this and punched the male in the jaw with one fist, then the opposite eye with the other. Then he grabbed a strap from the wall, put it between the filth’s teeth, and fastened it behind his head. Cassian grabbed him by his disgusting hair and put his face close to Handel’s before he said “You it seems are meant as a gift for Azriel Shadowsinger, and you will suffer here until he deigns to end you himself, IF, he deigns to end you, perhaps he’ll torture you for the next 300years, just, for, fun’ Cassian’s clipped lilt stopped as he turned to Mor and said ‘you wana tell him why?”. This was Mor’s moment, she deserved to be the one to terrify the monster before them, as he had done and far worse, to herself and Sanarie.  
Mor stepped forward and leaned into Handel’s face, as Cassian continued to hold his hair she smiled and said “Azriel Shadowsinger knows what you did to my sister 300years ago, learned of it this week, and as of this morning, had his mating bond snap with my sister’ Handel’s eyes widened in fear ‘What do you think The Shadowsinger will do to the male who raped is mate?”  
Handel paled and proceeded to piss himself; he wasn’t a complete fool then, hadn’t lost his mind completely after 300years being locked away beneath the Hewn City, Keir hadn’t kept him locked away as some punishment for touching Sanarie, he’d kept him because he may have proved useful. Now after 300years he was proving to be useful, Keir was baiting them, by sending this animal to them, and whilst Keir didn’t know it he could stand to bait Azriel the most, if they revealed to him who they had under the mountain in barracks.  
Morrigan felt tears stinging the backs of her eyes, she had to get out, it was too much for one day, she mustered a sneer and then walked out of the room, she tried to winnow but couldn’t, the place was warded.  
Cassian swung the door shut and cloaked himself and Morrigan so they couldn’t be heard, before she slipped down the wall and began to shake and cry holding her knees, she rocked back and forth. Cassian lent down slowly and wrapped his arms around her “It’s Cassian, you’re under a mountain in Velaris, you’re safe”  
“I killed the others, but I could never find him, Keir hid him whenever I went back, but he was one, 500years ago, before the nails, he, they” Morrigan spoke without much sense, but it was enough, Cassian had heard enough from the monster inside that he'd understood, she didn’t even need to say a word if she didn’t want too.  
“I understand what you’re saying, Azriel, Rhysand and I can deal with this, you don’t have too. He’s not getting out of here, he’s never hurting you or Sanarie again. And if you want to flay him and have us heal him when you’re done, so you can do it over and over again, for the next millennia, Rhys, Az and I will hold him down ourselves” Cassian said, then he realized she likely couldn’t hear him, as her eyes were glazed and she looked so far away.  
“S-Sanarie did something, when she s-sang, bought it all up. Like I was in a living nightmare, and the pain, in my body, like it was when they did it 500years ago. Madga saved me, knocked her out, but it was so real, I was there again and then I realized I knew his face, and I realized he also’ she paused and the tears flowed faster even than before ‘he did to Sanarie what he’d done to me 200years before. He was the only one I hadn’t found, when I tracked and killed the others once I recovered” Mor said, pushing out each word before she couldn’t anymore.   
Cassian watched her face, wrought with pain and anguish, he realized what she’d meant by what she’d said, “You couldn’t find him, you couldn’t have stopped what he did to Sanarie, Keir has always had secrets under that mountain, it’s one of the many reasons why you got out. Nothing is your fault, do you hear me” Cassian said, more command than question in his voice.  
Cassian stood up, locked the door, and knelt beside her again, then gently spoke to her “I’m going to pick you up now, I’m taking you home” Cassian said.  
He took her straight up and out, flew for as far as he could, then walked quickly when the cavern narrowed. He put such a strong red shield up around them, that if anyone had seen them, they would have been a blur of what they’d looked like winnowing into his office, not even a half hour before, nothing would seem a miss. Though Morrigan was grasped in his arms, as before, this time she shook and cried silent tears, as she lent on Cassian’s chest. The shield made his movement through the tunnels silent, and he wrapped his black wings around Mor so that they all but melded into the darkness, from the depths of the hole, to his office no one even noticed them. Once in his office, Cassian walked to one of the huge windows, threw them open and jumped straight through. Cassian didn’t give the males a second thought as he flew for Morrigan’s house, the males were naked, bound and trapped down a hole, which they couldn’t escape, not least because it was warded against any of their magic, but because the drop into the hole descended far deeper than the room they were trapped in. Even if they escaped the room, which was impossible, they’d be across from the high ledge above and face a perilous fall into the black below. There was no escape for them, the guards were an unnecessary precaution and gave the guards on duty something to do other than train, eat and sleep.  
He was going to take Mor to Feyre, but Sanarie was there, and whatever her power was, he didn’t think Mor was anywhere near ready to be there with her, sister or no, intentional or no, Mor wasn’t ready to be near her, in case whatever she had done to Mor happened again. So Cassian flew to Mor’s townhouse, in the High Street of the Established Market Quarter, when he landed in front of her house he walked to the door and hoped it was unlocked, the momentary concern was unnecessary when the door was wrenched open by Nalum before he could reach for it. Cassian looked like he’d been slapped, he pulled back from the door and looked up at the number above the door, he had the right house, he looked back at Nalum, she looked worried, but also fearsome, she didn’t wait for the shocked and confused looking Cassian to come inside, instead she stepped forward and took Mor from Cassian.  
“Morrigan? It’s Nalum, it’s okay now’ Nalum said to Mor kissing her temple in comfort. Before she whipped her head to Cassian ‘What happened” she snapped the last two words at Cassian, with none of the warmth or gentleness she’d used with Mor.  
He held up his hands and said “Long story, I was just bringing her home, where she feels safe”  
“Shut the door and lock it, I won’t take any chances after what I heard from the barracks. I’ve been waiting for her to come home, I couldn’t be sure if it was her or her sister, everyone else in Velaris thinks it was Morrigan shot from the sky” Nalum said, as she took Mor upstairs to her bedroom.  
Nalum placed Mor in the gilded gold-foil bed, tucked her under the damask, red, down & feather duvet and leaned over her, stroking her hair, whispering to her, comforting her. Mor turned into Nalum, the female put her other arm under Mor, pulled her closer and held her tight.  
Cassian surveyed the scene before him, clothes typical of the masculine female whom he worked with on occasion and had come to expect from her were strewn on the bed, cast off before her afternoon shift teaching the budding warrior females. She was wearing her leathers, but her casual masculine clothes had been left on Mor’s bed; Nalum was living in Mor’s house. It wasn’t a shock to him that she was here, Mor had saved her it was natural that there was a bond between the females. It was that she was living in Mor’s bedroom, and that it was a secret, he knew this because when he’d asked Nalum many months ago where she took lodgings, she had said she was taking lodgings in a seedier part of town, and Morrigan’s townhouse in the Established Market Quarter, was the farthest from seedy that it got.  
Cassian turned his eyes to the bed, Nalum was comforting Mor in a way which was more familiar and intimate than he’d have expected, she’d kissed her temple downstairs, but it didn’t strike him as overly intimate until everything after that had happened, and now Cassian saw with open eyes.  
“I’ll just leave her with you then” Cassian said, Mor hadn’t wanted him to know about this, that was clear, but it hurt him, how could she not tell him, he didn’t care who she was with or why she was with them, casually or otherwise. Did she not trust him? Did she think he would judge her? Did she think he wouldn’t keep her secret for as long as she needed him too?  
Nalum turned to say “I’ve got her, she’ll be fine, no Darkbringer will get past an Illyrian warrior, female or not, I got this’ then she saw in Cassian’s eyes the understanding, the hurt, she swallowed, and continued ‘She’s not ready, no one can know”  
Cassian forced a smile through the hurt, and said “I know” and he did, he hadn’t planned on telling anyone, not even his brothers, not even the closest thing Mor had to a brother, she’d tell Rhysand and them all when she was ready.  
Nalum nodded to him in thanks and turned back to Mor, she soothed her and kissed her head, rocked her gently, soothingly and began to sing to her in old Illyrian.  
Cassian smiled, it actually made a lot of sense, and watching Mor in Nalum's arms, he wondered why he hadn’t seen it sooner.


	22. Chapter 22

It was hard for Cassian to leave Mor seeing the state she was in, but she was thankfully in the arms of someone she trusted, perhaps even loved, Cassian was still processing that. He wondered if Azriel knew, if the strange silent gazes he had aimed in Mor's direction over the past 500years, was actually him knowing the truth and longing for her to tell it, so she could be free and therefore happy; because no one can be truly happy, unless they're free.  
So many thoughts tumbled over in his mind, he needed to break his train of thought, so he could focus and get the most out of the males down the hole.  
Cassian stopped by the sanctum mess, threw some cool spring water straight from the heart of the mountains, on his face and over his head, to help refresh him and clear his thoughts.  
When Cassian walked back into the cavernous room down the hole and shut the thick iron door, he was met with Handel's filthy glare, he chuckled a deep amused sound at the males expression "You're a sassy bastard for one who's strung up naked and covered in his own piss" Cassian said, Handel's low answering growl, through the leather strap still affixed around his mouth, said how much he appreciated Cassian's sense of humour; not at all.  
Cassian rounded the scaffold and slapped the other male a few times on the cheek, not hard, but hard enough to rouse the male from the sleeping tonic. The same tonic used on all other prisoners, before being bought into the inner sanctum of the Velaris barracks, it had of course been forced down both males throats, before Cassian had flown each male down here, removed their clothes and concealed weapons, then strung them up and left them there until he'd returned with Mor.  
The male looked gray and peaky as he surveyed the walls behind Cassian, which were covered in sharp, mean looking instruments and devices for torture. This was not a male trained for torture Cassian knew, he didn't have the hardened look of a tough male, trained and prepared for pain or death. As the male looked into Cassian's eyes, he knew this was no assassin, so why was he caught with Handel?  
"Permission to speak My Lord" the male asked.  
Cassian laughed, looked at the male in disbelief and said "Well, those are the last words I'd ever expect to hear out of a Hewn City, Darkbringer's mouth"  
"I hate that place, I was there under oath, my allegiance is to another, not Keir Darkbringer" the male said.  
"First things first, what's your name" Cassian asked.  
"Aemon Meissia; the Hewn City knows me solely as Aemon" Aemon said.  
"That's a Dawn Court family name, how did you end up under the mountain in the Hewn City" Cassian asked.  
"The Shadowsinger saved my life, after the last war" Aemon winced, and cut himself off from finishing.  
"Azriel Shadowsinger, you swore a life debt to him then?" Cassian asked.  
"I can't say, I'm sorry My Lord" Aemon said.  
Cassian noted that the Darkbringer Aemon did actually look sorry before he spoke "This is quickly becoming the strangest conversation I've had in this room" Cassian said, wondering if the male before him was trying to manipulate him, giving glimpses of truth but not revealing all, pushing Cassian to think he owed Azriel a life debt.  
Seeing that he'd already ruined his attempt at concealing his true master, and weighing the fact that this was the General and friend of his master; Aemon began to spill his guts "Get the Shadowsinger, please, he will tell you who I am, I am his spy, I did not know the true reason Keir had sent us here when we left' this was a new one, Cassian thought, before Aemon continued and recited the Spy's Oath 'It's an honour to be in your service; Spymaster. I pledge my loyalty to you; this day, and every other. I pledge my knowledge to you; this day, and every other. On my honour as a spy for the Shadowsinger and Spymaster, I am bound by my word"  
Not just a sworn life debt Cassian realized, a Hewn City Spy sworn to Azriel. He looked at Aemon, the Darkbringer come Shadowsinger's Spy seemed to be telling the truth, Cassian's instincts were rarely wrong, but they were at war, he had to be sure, he needed Morrigan or Truthteller, or Rhysand's daemati powers. Cassian decided until he knew for sure, he could treat Aemon a little more gently, so he got the male some fresh water and bread, Aemon didn't try to bite him or spit at him, a good indication Cassian thought. "I will not torture you as I believe you and I'm very rarely wrong about these things, but I cannot release you, the Shadowsinger is indisposed; the female who took the final arrow, was not Morrigan, it was her sister who, as it happens is the Shadowsinger's mate, and she very nearly died today, would have, if it weren't for the care and expertise of very good healers. You will be moved to a different cell until Rhysand, Morrigan or The Shadowsinger can validate your story. Until then you have my word that you will be treated well" Cassian said, and retrieved a padded leather seated stool and helped him to perch on top, taking the weight of him, he also changed his bindings to something more comfortable, and covered him in a wool blanket, Aemon was still a prisoner, but he wasn't strung up and had been given back his dignity.  
"Thank you My Lord" Aemon said.  
"General will be fine for now" Cassian said.  
"I'm coming, with Amren and Tao, keep yourself and Morrigan away from the door" Rhysand said into Cassian's head, before he winnowed into the room with Amren on his arm and Tao clinging to her back and arm.  
"Shit, the little demon and her child are back' Cassian said, moving forward to scratch Tao under the chin, earning a poke on his forearm from Amren for his quip 'really, diamonds on your batpup Amren, has he even learned to hang upside down yet?"  
"No, he's a civilized bat baby, he sleeps lying down, usually with his mama" Amren said, matter-of-factly as if it was the most normal thing in the world.  
"I bet Varian loves that" Cassian said, sarcasm thick in his tone, which earned a healthy scowl from Amren.  
"I confess to be the one who bought Tao the diamonds, although he nudged them like they were his mothers milk, poor confused little bat" Rhysand said.  
"Spoiled, not confused' Amren said with all sincerity to Rhysand, as if that was truly a better reason. Amren shook her head as she surveyed the room and implements and asked 'Why the sink?"  
"Torture is messy" Cassian said, for Handel's ears.  
"Little beasties" Amren said, of her favourite three Illyrian males.  
Tao bleated looking at Cassian, so Amren passed him to Cassian who cuddled and cooed at him, Tao made soft bleating noises and nuzzled him, nibbling his ear. Cassian gently flipped him upside down and gripped his leg paws onto the faux bone chandelier which hung low in the cavernous room "This is how you bat, Tao, it's fun, you'll see"  
"Cassian, get him down, you know he doesn't understand what you're trying to do" Amren chided.  
As she spoke Tao looked confused, then began to flap his wings, Cassian scratched his black, chubby, furry, belly but it didn't settle him down to sleep, Tao let go and began to fly around the room.  
Not phased by Tao's excited flight, Cassian began to briefly explain the situation, he would leave everything about Mor out of it until they were alone, he wouldn't give Handel the satisfaction of knowing he'd got to her. "So while Tao gets acquainted with the chamber; this is Aemon, claims to be Azriel's spy and knew nothing about the assassination attempts, I'm inclined to believe him, which is the only reason he's no longer strung up naked, like that one' Cassian threw a thumb over his shoulder towards Handel 'He is for Azriel" Cassian said with a sneer over his shoulder, he'd tell Rhysand more about that later.  
As Tao flew around the room and got closer to the outer walls, Amren noted some of the protruding torture implements on the walls, called to him and tapped the scaffolding in the middle of the room, Tao crashed into the top and tumbled onto Aemon, gripping his paws on the blanket. Tao recovered himself and surveyed the male who's shoulders he had landed on, he nudged him and nibbled his ear gently, then climbed over the scaffold to the other male, sniffed him once and bit him hard on the back of the neck, sinking his teeth in. Handel screamed a muffled cry of pain and fury, as Amren chuckled, and made her way to pick up Tao, who released Handel when he saw his Mama coming, he licked the blood from his nose and jaw, Amren took him onto her shoulder and crooned at him, scratching under his chin jiggling his diamonds "Sweet little male, such a good judge of character just like your mother" Amren said, pride plain on her face.  
"You mean; bloodthirsty, just like his mother" Cassian jibed her without a second thought. Rhysand huffed a chuckle and hoped Amren was in the mood to take it well.  
"Don't listen to Uncle Cassian, he's more batpup than you are" Amren said.  
"Well, I guess that one is being truthful about being Azriel's spy, if Tao can be trusted' Rhysand turned to stand directly in Aemon's line of sight then said, 'if you would let me into your mind, I can see for myself and we can release you. I really am quite impressed with the barrier in your mind, I can't see past it, no matter how I try and that's not a failure I'm used to with someone who's not daemati" Rhysand said to Aemon, very impressed by his mental shield.  
"It was the only thing I was good at, besides going unnoticed in that court' Aemon said, absently as he looked to the walls and then Rhysand, deciding to cooperate, because he'd chance the High Lord inside his mind over those torture implements any day 'Fine just do it" Aemon said, leery enough of the power in the room and his High Lords reputation; to fear Rhysand.  
Rhysand went into the antechamber of Aemon's mind, iron doors interlaced with cobwebs slowly swung open, and Rhysand made sure to keep them forced open so he could get out, those cobwebs could well intend on trapping him.  
Aemon's mind opened, and revealed memories, Rhysand stood in them as himself, observing the memory so he could see, hear Aemon's sincerity. Some of the memories were him with Azriel; first pledging him his life after Azriel saved him from a creature in the woods, then his beautiful face shifting, the males previously ash blonde hair changed along with his face, to strawberry blonde hair and a new ugly, face, his eyes however remained the same; deep green eyes. The memories continued to Azriel training him, Aemon knowing he wasn't who the Shadowsinger would have picked for any job in the Hewn City, but that wasn't how it was done, you didn't choose who was in your service they pledged to you. Aemon was all the Spymaster had, Aemon knew he likely needed someone in that court after the war, when all courts had lost spies to death. The memories progressed, showed Aemon under the Hewn City Mountain, he gave measured, veiled, kindness when he could afford to give it, to Sanarie, as he could see who she was, the spell Keir had used before his arrival, was not recast, he had been Azriel's key to finding Sanarie. Lastly the events of that day, began to replay.  
Rhysand shifted within Aemon's mind, so that he saw these next moments from his direct perspective, so that he could feel his emotions too.  
Rhysand began to experience Aemon's memories from the morning; Aemon knew the moment he saw the bow pulled taught by Handel and aimed at the Illyrians in the sky, it was his master and his sons, it was Morrigan and Sanarie his master held in his arms. Aemon was glad he'd been sent, being told or not, Keir had made one fatal mistake; sending him. He wasn't the best warrior, but he could stop this, or he would die trying and the life debt would be paid in full. He managed to knock Handel to miss the first arrow, and magiced away the declaration burned arrows which had been discreetly entrusted to Handel by Keir, and hadn't been seen by Aemon until it was too late, they were sent to spy on Velaris and the Court of Dreams, something Aemon had every intention of telling his true master about before they even returned to Keir. Aemon's duty had been scouting, shifting his eyes to hawks eyes, he scouted, made sure they weren't seen. Aemon lurched for the third of their party, but missed the arrow, and it struck true, hitting the smallest male through his wing. Aemon watched him fall, a sickening feeling filled his stomach, Handel took one last arrow from the third males quiver, aimed and fired, Aemon was not meant for battle, he was a quiet, observer, made for stealth, but not for this. Azriel had taken his pledge because there was no one else left after the war, slim pickings, especially in such a court and Aemon knew it. Aemon had failed Azriel, he felt it all over his body like a dull ache, his son and a female may die, and he knew in that moment that he had failed, that he wasn't worthy of his position. Aemon wondered if Keir knew he was a spy, but doubted it, he'd never have made it out alive if Keir had known, but Keir was so paranoid about this plan, he had only told the two males who would do the assassinations and not even their third lookout. Rhysand pulled out of his mind and took a deep cleansing breath, and then, not bound like the prisoners by the wards, magiced away the ropes which bound him to the scaffold and helped him up. "He is who he says he is' Rhysand said 'I offer you sanctuary Aemon Spy of the Shadowsinger, you saved lives today, do not underestimate the value of your worth; to the Shadowsinger and indeed this court" Rhysand slapped his back in comradeship, the male felt guilty for not being able to do more, but he had done plenty, and he had told the truth.


	23. Chapter 23

Mor woke up late afternoon in Nalum’s arms, she had cried and stared into space for hours, haunted by old memories, until she finally fell asleep. Her memories plagued her in her dreams as well, only they were twisted and distorted into horrors she’d never known.   
The nightmares, only allowing her near an hour of rest. She woke up sweating and screaming with Nalum wiping tears from her face, speaking softly, trying to wake her and soothe her. It was moments like this, she was eternally grateful not to be in bed alone, unable to rouse herself from sleeping terrors.   
“You’re safe, you’re here with me” Nalum said, holding her, kissing her head and brushing her fingers through her hair.   
“She did something to me, cracked open old wounds, and then the pain from those wounds manifested like a living nightmare” Mor said, her voice small and cracking, with the emotional strain lodged in her throat.   
“You don’t have to tell me anything, or you can if you need to, and know it goes no further, I’m here, I’ve got you” Nalum said, she still wore her Illyrian Leathers, combat boots and had some weapons strapped to her.   
Nalum had heard of Mor falling, bloody, from the sky, news spread fast in Velaris and by the time she’d got to the barracks they had the word from the street. She’d cancelled everything for the rest of the day, said she’d lend herself to the inner circle of the court, told the warriors on duty to escort the boarding house for Illyrian females back if they came, she said likely their house mother would keep them back for their safety until the all clear was given. Nalum had gone straight home, and waited, hoped, knew she couldn’t enquire after Mor, she had to wait, it took almost 2hrs but she came home, in the General’s arms, physically unharmed, but emotionally broken. Nalum kept her leathers on, and would until she knew the walls of Velaris were safe and the city within, was empty of Nightmare Court traitors, she was Mor’s protection, until she could again protect herself.   
“I need tea and wine” Mor said, after a few minutes of just breathing and crying, she’d calmed herself, by telling herself it was a dream, it wasn’t real. She shifted constantly in Nalum’s arms, not because she was uncomfortable, but because she needed to feel her there, Nalum kept soothing her with her hands and that helped too, helped to remind her where she was and who she was with.   
“I can take you with me to the kitchen or leave you here” Nalum said, offering her a choice, she knew Mor was raw, delicate, and likely would be for days.   
“With you, but I feel so drained, I can’t walk downstairs” Mor said.  
“Lucky you have a strapping butch Illyrian female to carry you then” Nalum said, she scooped Mor up and walked towards the door.   
Mor smiled at Nalum’s words, and her gentleness, and felt guilty as she realized she didn’t need tea and wine, she needed to wash off the day first “I’m sorry” she said.   
“You have nothing to be sorry for” Nalum said.   
Mor brushed her hand over Nalum’s face as hers looked guilty, Nalum stopped in the middle of the stairway down to the ground floor and Mor kissed her lips gently.   
“Oh, don’t do that face, you look sorry, but you’ve done nothing” Nalum said, kissing her back.   
“I need a shower and fresh clothes, I think I’d like to burn these after this day” Mor said.   
“That’s no reason to be sorry, no more guilty face, you know I’d happily carry you through the streets of Velaris with ease, and not just because you’re injured, any reason or none at all would do. So no more face” Nalum said. She’d take a sad face, anxious face, anything but the guilty face.   
“Shower with me?” Mor asked.   
“As if I could ever say no to you” Nalum said. Mor beamed at her, and nuzzled into her neck, placing grateful kisses on her neck and collarbone.  
“Eay, you know that’s dangerous territory, don’t start something you can’t finish you wicked female” Nalum said.   
Mor giggled, and said “Sorry, ML”   
Nalum put her down on the chaise in the large bathroom, and both females started undressing themselves, they would undress each other, but it wasn’t time for one of those showers. Nalum set her armour down in a way, which would make throwing them on easy, just in case.   
Mor saw what she’d done and said “I’ve half a mind to throw those on the floor, I know why you do that, and neither of us are in danger. This house is warded, please just be home with me, put your casual clothes back on, the soft ones we snuggle in on our days off”   
Nalum sighed, Mor knew her best, some small behaviours from traumas of the war still lingered, and it was time she broke them. There would be a time, in the near future, to fastidiously wear armour and horde weapons, but they weren’t there yet, so Nalum walked back to her carefully stacked pile of clothing and pushed it onto the floor “Happy ML”  
“Very” Mor said with a smile at Nalum, not half because Nalum was completely naked. If there was a better therapy than a naked female Illyrian Warrior in her bathroom, Mor didn’t know it, although shopping could make a close third, after sex with a ripped female Illyrian warrior; who also understood the complexities of female emotion and held her body with strong hands and arms, with the same strong gentleness shown tending emotions and mental weaknesses, Nalum was one who had a high emotional intelligence. Nalum was special, her emotional intelligence was what had attracted Mor to her initially, it was also their chemistry together; not something you found every day of the week. Then there was her masculine hair, clothing and the commanding way she carried herself, and the warriors body, the scars and tattoos; didn’t hurt any.   
“Don’t give me that face either, you know it drives me mad” Nalum said, noting the lust in Morrigan’s eyes as she took her in. Nalum tried not to look at Mor’s body, or else they’d both look like that and then where would they be; somewhere Nalum didn’t think Mor was ready for after her day. And she didn’t want to touch her before she’d told her about Cassian’s revelation, it would be a betrayal, like luring her in and then giving her blow, even though it wasn’t her fault, she was just the messenger. No, she’d care for her, not allow anything else to happen before she told her.  
“Go look in the mirror and say that to me again” Mor said, not removing the look from her face.   
Nalum turned from Mor to feel the shower water “It’s perfect, come here” she said, as she stepped to Mor scooped her up and set her down in the shower and shut the glass door.   
Mor came into her arms and started kissing her neck and collarbone, Nalum put a stop to it by holding her and kissing her gently, holding her self control not to be needful the way Mor was.   
“I need you, I’m okay to do this” Mor whispered.   
“No, later I promise, but not right now” Nalum said, she gently pecked Mor’s lips and pulled away.   
Mor pulled back at the cool gesture, Nalum saw the hurt rejection on her face and heaved a sigh, looking at her with sad eyes, she kissed her gently, more thoroughly this time to make up for it.   
“I’m sorry” Nalum said.   
“Then make love to me, and don’t pull away like that, it felt awful” Mor said.   
“Morrie, I have to tell you something, and if you still want me to make love to you then I will, but I won’t do it after, when you’re more vulnerable than you are now, it wouldn’t be fair” Nalum said.   
“Okay, now you’re scaring me, have you met some else” Mor asked.  
“No, there wouldn’t be anyone else, until I was out of your bed and your house. No one else is open for consideration, when I’m out in the city on my free time, without you, I refuse free drinks, I refuse the offer to dance, I refuse a walk to get fresh air. My friends are all male guards, you are the only female for me, for as long as I’m here, I’m yours; only” Nalum said, feeling initial sting from Mor’s words, but she buried those feelings because she knew they weren’t about her, they just said how raw and vulnerable Mor was at this moment.   
Mor looked guilty again.   
“Absolutely not, I said no guilty face” Nalum said.   
“I know, I didn’t mean to accuse you, I’m sorry” Mor said, realizing after Nalum’s words what she’d accused her of unintentionally.   
“I knew you’d be raw for a while, what you said wasn’t about what you think of me, it’s about what you expect from an oftentimes cruel world. I know my Mor is in there and she doesn’t think that of me, I know that’s just the trauma speaking. So no guilty face” Nalum said.   
Mor nodded, then replied “What is it then, give it to me straight, I can’t take the long version right now”   
“Cassian knows we are together, I asked him not to tell anyone when I saw the realization in his eyes, I told him you weren’t ready, and he said “I know”, so I take that as he won’t tell a soul” Nalum said, as straight as a sword, but not sharp as one.   
“Fuck me” Mor said, sounding exasperated, as if she needed one more thing from this day.   
“I know” Nalum said, she pulled her close and held her to her chest, letting her rest on the flat of her chest between her shoulder and sternum.  
“Next family dinner will be fun; “Hey fam, so quick catch up; we’re at war, papa tried to kill us... oh yeah, I’m gay as all fuck and like having sex with a sexy Illyrian warrior female”, Fucking Cauldron” Mor cursed, she wasn’t prepared for this.   
“They’ll probably say “Good for you, now pass the wine”, it won’t be as bad as you think” Nalum said.   
“It’s not the attraction to females part which will be awful, it’s the betrayal of not telling them for 500years. Azriel already knows, probably has for 500years, my hubris made me think he was in love with me, and okay maybe once when we were still young he thought he felt something, but now we know, it was a part of him, which likely knew his mate had my face, he just had the wrong one. Everything is such a mess” Mor said.   
“So 2 already know, less people to be disappointed or hurt because you didn’t tell them” Nalum said.   
“3 actually, I told Feyre during the last war, didn’t want to die with no one I loved knowing the biggest truth about me. Turns out Az knew anyway” Mor said.   
“You’re taking this far better than I thought you might” Nalum said, relieved she wasn’t more distressed.   
“Well, the day has been far worse so this seems trivial in comparison” Mor said.   
“You want your hair washed” Nalum asked.   
“That would be divine” Mor said. 

 

Nalum took care of Mor; and not just her hair. She was a little down cast, was prone to tears now and again, loud noises made her jump and her heart race, but all in all, she was pretty okay considering. Nalum had got her favourite shift and dressing gown, then carried her down for dinner, herself wearing soft cotton house clothes as Mor had wanted. Mor had dried and styled her hair then Nalum’s with some of her magic, a caring gesture she often did for Nalum in the mornings, it was Mor’s version of caring for her love, like making breakfast; for the cullinary inept.  
Nalum poured wine for Mor and set about making hot tea like she’d wanted, Mor magiced some food from her favourite restaurant onto the table and money into their register. She’d send them a little extra tomorrow with a note of apology and thanks, they wouldn’t mind, she knew that, she’d done it before, and they were a gracious type, as were most Velari's.   
“That looks good my love, from Alma’s Table” Nalum asked.   
“Yes, she won’t mind, she’ll probably know from what went missing, and money in the till that it was me” Mor said.   
“It may reassure her, if like me she heard The Morrigan fell bleeding from the sky, caught and disappeared with the Shadowsinger, it may soothe her worries” Nalum said.   
Mor nodded and then looked at Nalum “You thought I was dead, before Cassian bought me here, you thought it was me”   
Nalum walked over and set the tray of hot tea down, brushed Mor’s hair aside, cupping her head, she leaned down and kissed her gently, gratefully and said “Yes”.   
Mor noted the worried sadness in her eyes, as Nalum remembered what she’d gone through before Mor was bought home. Mor hadn’t even thought of how this had affected her, Nalum had been so strong for her, it hadn’t seemed to have affected her at all.   
“I should have sent you a message, I was taking care of Atticus, we were stuck at the house of Wind until Cassian got us and then it just didn’t stop; Azriel lost it, Sanarie sang in a language I didn’t recognize, and ripped open old traumas, Azriel had gone and battled with Devlin and his men, I went and reprimanded him and sent him back to Sanarie, who’s half Illyrian by the way, and then went to interrogate and possibly torture the assassins and that’s just where it became too much” Mor said, spewing out the rough details of the morning.   
Nalum looked at her wide-eyed in amazement, and said “Wow, that’s a lot to take in and I didn’t experience any of it. My poor love”. She held Mor close standing beside her chair.   
“I got so caught up, you didn’t even know if I was alive” Mor said, realizing how secrets were strangling not just her, but the people she loved.   
“Shhh, it’s okay, at least now I know I can discreetly approach Cassian, Azriel or Feyre, if anything like this happens again, no harm done” Nalum said, not wanting Mor to feel guilt on top of everything else, she’d gone through enough that day and Mor hadn’t gone into much detail.  
“Hungry” Mor asked.   
“Starving” Nalum said, leaving her with a kiss to the top of her head.  
“We have to go shopping in the war camps tomorrow” Mor said.  
“What? What the hell for” Nalum asked astonished, it wasn’t the kind of retail haunt Mor was likely to seek out.   
“For siphons, for my sister, strong ones and plenty of them. We don’t know if they’ll even work on her because she’s half high Fae, but if we can get a variety of stones, at the best quality and many of them, maybe they’ll help her control her power; because unchecked I think she could be dangerous, even though she wouldn’t mean to be” Mor said.   
“Well, by we do you mean, you and I, or you and your family” Nalum asked, referring to the inner circle.   
“I don’t know, I have to speak to Rhysand first, he still has to deal with the fallout from what Az did today, and he likely needs to check on whether those repercussions also extend to the other camps as well” Mor said, thinking about how one bad day could create so much trouble.   
The front door crashed open down the hall, Mor just about hit the roof, and mere in moments, Nalum had retrieved a butchering knife, which she held in her hand, and as she pushed Mor behind her, wings flaring protectively. Light, quick footsteps sounded down the hall and Amren appeared, looking baffled as to why Nalum was making such a fuss.   
“Early dinner” Amren asked, looking behind Nalum and Mor to the table.   
“What the fuck Amren” Mor asked.   
“What? You didn’t answer and your door wouldn’t open, I fixed it, it opens now” Amren said.   
“Mother help me’ Mor pushed Nalum’s knife arm down gently and walked around her to Amren ‘Hey Batphew, how did you like summer? You hated it, good, Night is your home and we are your family; even to your crazy mother; who has no house manners, not even enough curtesy to knock before she kicks the door in” Mor said, scratching Tao on his favourite spots as she carried a conversation with him.   
“I did knock, actually, ages ago; I got tired of waiting. Alma’s” Amren asked, addressing the last comment and pulling away from Mor to walk to the table.   
“Yes, I suppose you just invited yourself for dinner then?” Mor said. “I’ll take that as an invitation” Amren said, looking pleased with how her evening was turning out.   
Nalum walked back into the room after checking the front door, looking surprised and said “Can I take off one of your internal doors, until I can replace the front door tomorrow” Nalum asked, standing in the hall, tool bag over her shoulder.   
“What did you do to my front door, that it needs replacing Amren” Mor said, she got up and looked down the hall. The door was in two, the top half hung from the hinges, and the bottom lent back against the wall, there were even splinters littering the floor.   
“I say again; what the fuck Amren?” Mor said, looking at her slack jawed.   
“I just needed to come in, and I was out there for ages, I sat on the step and drank some of my wine, then I got tired of waiting so I opened the door myself” Amren said, as she arranged Tao on a chair, she had turned it around so he could grip the back of the chair, and placed some pillows on it so he could sit at the table.   
Mor was slack jawed again, shaking her head at the scene before her. She turned to Nalum and said, “do whatever you can, use whatever you need, we can use the back door until it can be fixed, just nail it shut if need be”   
“Go eat please, have you eaten at all today” Nalum said quietly.  
“Breakfast” Mor said, as if that was enough.   
Nalum gave her a look and said “Go, I’ll be as quick as I can, it’ll be loud when I’m hammering”   
“I know, thank you’ Mor said, then went to the table and sat down, she started dishing out herself some food, as she watched Tao, who Amren had put a plate in front of with an apple on it, which looked like she’d crushed it in her hand. ‘so you have zero house manners, but you’ve trained your batpup to sit and eat at a table” Mor looked at Amren shaking her head.   
They sat and ate in silence for a while, listening to Nalum bumping around down the hall with the smashed front door, as she removed it and propped an internal door on the wall ready to replace the smashed one.  
After a while Nalum called out, “I’m going to hammer now, it’ll be loud”   
“Thank you” Mor called back, and the loud banging sounds began to ring out. Mor knew when they started if she hadn’t had the warning, she’d have been a lot more anxious than she currently was. On edge she could handle, especially with a good feed and some wine in front of her.   
It was quiet for a long while except for cutlery and Tao bleeting now and again, appreciating his food, and the sounds of Nalum working down the hall, until Amren broke the silence, she said “She’s not your mate you know”   
Mor’s face drained of color at the words, she thought Nalum would appear to be a personal guard and friend, but when she saw Amren who looked a little off balance and annoyed; Mor knew there was no hiding it “I know” she said, putting down her knife and fork to have the conversation.  
“Don’t get me wrong, you two look happy together and your scents are intertwined but it’s not that deep” Amren said.   
“Do I need to revoke your house invitation” Mor said, chiding Amren playfully with her question, trying to break the tension.   
Amren put down her glass of the wine she’d bought with her, she’d taken a big gulp and made a face just after she’d finished, then she spoke “I wouldn’t hide that one if she were mine, she’s’ Amren searched for words ‘different. No one cares if you like women Morrigan, I’m inclined to both sexes, it really depends on who they are as a person. So I’d be the last to judge who you love, and the rest of the circle is the same. Why are you hiding this” she finished with a question.   
“I don’t want my parents to know, they’ll say things and as much as I hate them, they’re still my parents and they still have the ability to hurt me. They’ve hurt me enough I can’t add more to that, they’ve judged me enough, ridiculed me enough, I can’t take any more, not one bit” Mor said, feeling dread at the prospect of what her parents would say or do, if they found out, they’d said and done enough things which haunted her, she didn’t need any more trauma added to that list.   
Amren nodded, and took another sip of wine “then it won’t leave Velaris, all registered Nightmare Court guests have been expelled and those who begged to stay are in the barracks, pending citizen approval. As I understand it Azriel will be vetting all of them, before they’re released. There’s no reason to hide yourself or her from your family or this city. Azriel got cut by a poisoned blade, he looks like he’s dying, never seen Madja look so worried, but she says he should be dead already, so he has a chance” Amren said, finishing with the reason she was sent, then she continued to eat.   
“Amren, you should have started with that” Mor said, appalled by her callousness, she felt like she was being punished, understood but also punished.   
“Oh he’ll be fine, it’s Az and he has the best healer in Velaris” Amren said.   
“I have healing ability too Amren, you should have come for me sooner” Mor said, just as Nalum came back in.   
“Well, I’m no carpenter, but it’ll do” she said, sitting down and serving herself.   
“I have to go, Azriel needs healing, apparently he’s been in bad shape for a while and she only tells me now’ Mor said, glaring at Amren ‘Oh, and she also figured out we’re together”   
“And how did that go” Nalum asked.   
“It went fine” Amren said, and kept eating.   
“I’ll be back soon” Mor said, and then she disappeared, she’d already winnowed to Azriel.


	24. Chapter 24

Mor manifested in the entry hall and ran up to the first floor, at the top of the stairs she slowed, realizing she was about to see her sister, unconscious, but she didn’t know if that would stop her sisters power. She reached the door and paused in the doorway, Madja was whispering low to her apprentice, leaving instructions, there wasn’t anything more she could do that her apprentice couldn’t see to just as competently.  
“There hasn’t been another episode after what happened between you and your sister, it’s safe” Madja said, seeing her reluctance to step into the room. The old female looked wan, she’d been in and out of this house today, and likely still had other patients to see, the sun was setting, but a healer did what they needed before they took the evenings rest.  
“What poison is it?” Mor asked, as she moved apprehensively into the room.  
“A potent distillation of Black Nightshade. It seems your sisters power has healing so that is helping him, but lay your hands on, he could use all the healing he can get” Madja said.  
Mor’s eyes widened as she heard the name of the poison, most males would be dead already with a potent mix, thankfully this male had just felt his mating bond snap, to a female who it seemed had healing ability. Azriel had a lot to live for, he had been tended in the crucial stages of his poisoning and by the best healer in the city; if anyone could get through this unscathed he could.  
“Holy Mother” Mor said, as she pushed past Rhysand and Feyre, and saw Azriel lying on the bed nearest the door, Sanarie lay next to him on the window side. Her amazement was at the collective sight before her, of Azriel and Sanarie; Azriel was surrounded by white wisps of light, and Sanarie, surrounded by black wisps of shadow. They were both unconscious and yet their magic’s each sought to shield or heal the other, in that moment Mor realized she’d been carrying guilt from using her truth power to compel Azriel against his will, it dissolved and she knew she’d been right to send him back to her sister; for both their sakes.  
Mor apprehensively pushed her hand through her sisters light magic wisps, and placed her hand on Azriel’s chest. She needn’t have worried about her contact with her sisters magic, her sister slept on peacefully, her power felt soothing around Mor’s hand and she felt no resurgence of her past.  
Mor let her healing power run fast into Azriel’s body, her sisters light felt warm around her wrist and forearm. She used her other hand to pull back Azriel’s covers, she took in a sharp breath as she saw his skin; there were cuts and bruises, which were struggling to heal, as his body diverted resources to save his organs. Beneath his skin and perhaps more troubling were black veins, she looked to Madja.  
The healer said “Fortunately for Azriel it looks worse that it is and he was seen to quickly, if it was any more potent or he didn’t have healers readily available, it would have been very different. He has four healers tending him, including his friend, and his mate, he is one lucky male. Had it been anyone else with this potent mix of the Black Nightshade, it would likely be a different story” Madja said, giving Rhysand a knowing look, which he returned, they each knew this wouldn’t go unpunished.  
“Still, I don’t want that black death used on my people, weapons laced with it in war is one thing, but this is quite another and if that many of them couldn’t take down a scattered, enraged Azriel, then they have bigger problems” Rhysand said.  
“From your lips, into their thick warrior skulls High Lord” Madja said, snapping her bag shut and turning to leave.  
Rhysand and Feyre laughed heartily, even Mor by the bed chuckled at the unexpected words from the healer.  
Madja looked over her shoulder at the door and had a small amused smile on her face, then said “That is the last of the healing I hope to do in this house tonight, so enjoy it”  
Rhysand nodded appreciatively to her, and she left.  
“I needed to speak to Rhysand about something” Mor said.  
“I’ll be in the kitchen preparing some more tonics and tinctures, I will be in and out this evening, and anything I hear has a healers discretion” Madja’s apprentice said, realizing by the tone of Mor’s voice, that the following conversation should be between the High Lord and his Third.  
“Thank you Igrid” Rhysand said, dismissing her with a polite nod.  
“Of course, High Lord, I won’t come up and disturb you again until I’m asked, I’d hate to interrupt and he’s in good hands” Igrid said, bobbing a small curtsey, and leaving with a basket of supplies.  
Rhysand thought he knew what Mor needed to discuss, but Cassian had briefed him already, saving Mor the trauma of reliving it again “I know about the monster under the barracks, Cassian told me your revelations about him, he’s for you and Azriel, to carve up and question, and if you can’t bear it, he will gladly do it for both you and Sanarie’s sakes” Rhysand said, as gently as he could, trying not to say anything to trigger her.  
“No, it’s not that, I figured Cassian would have told you about that already. It’s about Sanarie; I want to try siphons with her, so we need to go shopping. But I’m thinking we need to assess Devlin and his camp, and possibly the other camps too, before I go looking for some quality siphons” Mor said, being fully aware of the complexities of war, knowing that old allegiances weren’t given in the climate of war, she and her compatriots all understood this, they would all tread carefully from now on.  
“Devlin won’t give any serious trouble, he’ll want some kind of compensation out of this, but he won’t make trouble. And I will be sure to remind his camp, who the High Lord of their territory is, so that he doesn’t have to deal with any dissention within his ranks. As for the Siphons, I’ve already asked some Velaris jewellers to acquire some, they said they’d have them by the day after tomorrow” Rhysand said.  
Mor nodded and said “Good, I need to know we’re trying to help Sanarie, as it’s clear she can’t help herself. Keeping the Illyrian’s in check needs to be a priority, we don’t need the Illyrians joining Keir” Mor said, heavy dread filling her stomach at the thought, it’d be civil war within Prythian if that happened. They couldn’t fight Keir alone, not if he had his Darkbringers AND the Illyrians, they’d have to call on the other high lords to join them.  
“No, we certainly don’t. Tarquin replied to the letter I left him earlier today, with an official pledge to side with me and to bring his army to the front if and when I call for Summer Court’s aid. I have sent messages to the other High Lords requesting the same, I will duplicate their pledges and have them sent to each war camp leader, let the Illyrians decide which side they will stand with when all of Prythian is pledged to me and it’s them and the Darkbringers against the entire continent. I’m sure Keir has already made them an offer, in the hope they’ll fight with him” Rhysand said.   
Mor heaved a deep sigh, then said “And so the tides of war come in again”  
“At least that tide is not a tsunami this time” Rhysand said, thinking of the last war, the magnitude of it and thankful that whilst it was war, the stakes were far lower.  
Feyre pulled over a chair for Morrigan, which she fell into once she had all but drained herself in healing Azriel “You gave too much” she said, rubbing the back of Mor’s neck and shoulders with one hand, trying to comfort her and ease the tension there.  
“It will replenish, he’s not allowed to die on my sister, she hasn’t survived 500 years in hell with our father, only to lose her mate the day her bond snaps with him” Mor said, sounding unphased about her well of power being all but depleted, yet determined that her sister would not lose her mate.  
Amren walked into the bedroom silently, no one heard her approach, which is really saying something when considering Fae senses, her new and strange powers were unnerving. Amren put Tao to bed in his habitat before coming to see Azriel’s mate for the first time, she looked at the bed and stilled her whole body.  
“Soulsinger” Amren whispered, astonished that Sanarie was what Amren had suspected when Rhysand had explained what they knew of her powers, but she hadn’t let herself believe it until she could see with her own eyes.  
“Holy Mother, Amren” Feyre said, Amren had unexpectedly broken the quiet vigil at Azriel’s bedside.  
“Sneaky, Terror in the Dark” Rhysand said, shaking his head, Amren was unnerving nowadays, in the way she could avoid being heard or even seen if she wanted to.  
Amren’s eyes were fixated on Sanarie and Azriel, she looked from Sanarie to Azriel, witnessing their powers crossed over each other “Healer, Protector; World Crossers” Amren breathed, she kept her eyes intensely locked on the bed, but moved closer to the window side, to get a better look at Sanarie.  
“Oh here we go, what does that mean” Feyre asked, watching Amren, feeling unease tighten in her stomach at the words.  
Amren’s slow movements were broken when she reached Sanarie’s side of the bed and leaned over, her head snapped to Morrigan, and back again, when she looked up at Mor next she said “Well this explains the past 500 years of the Shadowsinger’s pining”   
Morrigan chuckled a dry, tired sound and then lent her head back, exhaustion washing over her.  
“I’m putting you to bed” Feyre said, walking to hold Mor’s arm so she could Winnow her home to Nalum, realizing it wouldn’t do, she reached down and plucked Mor from her chair.  
“Thank you” Mor said, mumbling barely discernible words, she was 100% done.  
Feyre looked up at Rhysand and smiled, a gesture which was returned before she disappeared with Morrigan.  
Amren remained looking at Sanarie through Azriel’s shadows as she spoke to Rhysand, shaking her head she said “I didn’t believe you, thought because she was family maybe you saw something which wasn’t there, but it really is uncanny” Amren said.  
“You saw Sanarie at breakfast the day you left” Rhysand said.  
“No, I didn’t, I saw their hair and shape was the same, but I never saw her face. Her head was hung and Azriel whisked her away from Nesta’s unpleasantness before I saw her face” Amren said, she hadn’t believed Rhysand when he’d told her the sisters looked the same at his briefing, but now she did, there was no denying it.  
Downstairs the front door slammed, and heavy boots could be heard taking the stairs two at a time, Cassian within moments appeared in the doorway.  
“You’re not exactly built for stealth are you?” Rhysand said, shaking his head slightly.  
“That’s what you have him for’ Cassian said nodding to Azriel, he froze, his eyebrows raised and he bore a shocked expression ‘Wow, what is she, she’s like Azriel’s perfect opposite”   
“Soulsinger apparently” Rhysand said, as Amren walked behind him so she could reach Azriel’s side of the bed.  
“Soulsinger” Cassian asked, baffled as to what that even meant.  
“She sings the souls of places, people, anything which has spirit or energy, her power can heal or destroy. Singers were named for her kind, for she will actually sing, singers weren’t named for Shadowsingers, his kind came after” Amren said, leaning down to inspect Sanarie’s light wisps, she sniffed them and pulled back, shocked.  
“What?” Rhysand and Cassian asked in unison.  
“Her Light smells of the Nightshade” Amren said, she sounded skeptical, as if even she thought she’d imagined it.  
Cassian pushed past her and leaned down to sniff them too “I smell nothing” he said, looking at Amren as if she’d lost it.  
As if Sanarie’s light had heard them it rose from Azriel, into the air and collected itself up into a ball, as it undulated tighter it got brighter, until a speck of black began to grow in it’s centre. Then it hovered to Rhysand and stopped, the half inch in diameter ball of black in the centre, started to descend out of the light, Rhysand pulled a glass jar from between space and caught it. Without the light moulding it, it sank to a thin flat mass at the bottom of the jar, Sanarie’s light immediately went back and surrounded Azriel, and the Shadowsinger seemed to breathe deeper and more relaxed once it again encircled his body.  
Amren looked to Cassian and said “You were saying”  
“How the hell did you smell that” Cassian said, looking at Amren as if she had grown two large heads.  
“It’s going to take some time to get used to your new powers, sneaking around without being heard or seen if you’re inclined, strength beyond ten Illyrian warriors, and now insanely accurate sense of smell, beyond any Fae senses, which are well developed compared to mortals anyway” Rhysand said, feeling grateful he had such a formidable third and that he didn’t need to demote her after she lost her grace. In many ways Amren was even more deadly now, because now she had the Cauldrons Blessing to be in its world and he suspected gifts from it too.  
“You’ll be glad you have me soon enough” Amren said, getting closer to the light with her hand, desperately wanting to touch.  
“I’m grateful for you now, third, terror in the dark” Rhysand said.  
“Sneaky, bloodthirsty, third in command” Cassian said, mimicking Rhysand with his own twist.  
Amren punched him, she pulled the blow a little, but not as much as she usually would, “You’re spoiling my moment, I want to feel her light” she said.  
“Are we allowed” Cassian asked, massaging his arm where Amren had hit it, shifting closer to the bed, his curiosity getting the better of him.  
“Sure, we all have, it’s warm, comforting, like a hug from your mother” Rhysand said, recalling his experience from earlier in the evening.  
Cassian reached out his hand now that he had permission, but Amren gently slapped it away, “Me first” she said, waving at him to step back.  
Cassian held up his hands and stepped back, smiling at Rhysand, he said “Aemon is set up in” he pointed to Amren and mouthed ‘her old apartment’.  
Her head whipped to Cassian, her hands on hips as she said “Who is Aemon and why did you put him in my old apartment, I still have possessions there Cassian” she crossed her arms across her chest and looked, pissed.  
“Have you ever noticed that she kinda looks like an Illyrian toddler having a tantrum, when she’s mad” Cassian said, to Rhysand.  
“I think it’s the black hair, or maybe because she comes up to our knees” Rhysand said, looking to Amren.  
They didn’t even see her move, and they were on their asses looking at her standing back by the bed, looking thoroughly pleased with herself at the shocked, amused looks on their faces, and the sight of them flat on their backsides didn’t hurt either.  
“I leave for barely 20minutes and you’re all behaving like batpups” Feyre said from the threshold, she lent on the frame and bore a mothers mock-disapproving look.  
“They started it” Amren said, as she pointed at the males on the floor.  
“They always do” Feyre said, trying to stifle a chuckle.


	25. Chapter 25

Azriel woke up next to Sanarie, he’d managed to get down most of the root Madja had given him before he passed out, and she was right if he didn’t get down the whole thing in short order, he’d regret it; he’d barely opened his eyes and he was already lamenting not scoffing the thing. He felt like mortals did when they got sick; cold, weak, pained and shaky.   
Azriel groaned and blinked the fogginess of sleep out of his eyes, it didn’t work, his vision was still white and blurry, it troubled him but he didn’t want to panic for nothing so he waited for it to pass.  
“He’s awake, Azriel’s awake’ Elain yelled over her shoulder into the hallway as she stood next to him, she felt his forehead with the back of her hand, then went and took a vial of tonic from the side table, she shook it, unstoppered it, as she stood over Azriel and said ‘you’re going to drink this, all of it, and you’re not going to complain about how it tastes, or spit it out” Elain looked at him with lips pursed and chin down, doing her version of a serious no-nonsense face.  
“I wouldn’t dare” Azriel said, he sat up on his elbows and drank it down fast, it was vile.  
Once he finished the last of it, Elain poured a little water in the bottle swished it around and put it back to his lips, tipping his head back and pouring the oily dregs full of musty herbs and roots down his throat, then she took a glass from the bedside and put that to his lips, he was about to refuse, he’d only agreed to the one tonic, but he smelled blessed fruit juice and took it swishing it around his mouth before swallowing, until it was empty.  
“When did you get so’ he stopped speaking, to think of the right word; sassy wasn’t it, forceful maybe or intense, he settled for something between the latter two, ‘potent” Azriel said.  
“I’ve learned having brothers is akin to having children when they’re ill, and you can’t give an inch to sick batpups or they’ll take a mile” Elain said, she was serious but there was also light in her face, which betrayed the levity she also felt at her words.  
Azriel barked a laugh so loud and hard, he triggered his disused throat to coughing and spluttering.   
Elain filled his glass with water and stood by with it, he reached for it and gulped it down until the glass was empty lubricating his dry throat, and easing the sensitivity there.  
“Elain I don’t want to alarm you, but my vision hasn’t cleared, you’re a little blurry, through a white haze” Azriel said, scared of what the poison had done.  
Elain paused and looked at him like he was an idiot “Look down at your body, then look at your mate and remember who she is, batpups, honestly” Elain said, as she watched Azriel look down his body, and accross to Sanarie, he was surrounded by her light, only a few wisps fluttered around her, the mass of them surrounded him.  
Azriel had a thought and moved his hand side to side in front of his face, parting Sanarie’s light wisps as she had his shadows, he could see hawk’s eye clear, he sighed and kicked himself for thinking he was partly blind. “I’m going to kiss her now, try not to squeal the house down” Azriel said, then shook his head as before he’d even finished Elain was gushing at him, it was in jest though, because she stuck out her tongue and turned around to give them a few private moments.  
Azriel kissed Sanarie’s lips tenderly, with three brief kisses, as he rested his lips to hers between each kiss, and felt that inside the room was cool, kept so by magic to keep the heat of summer outside; inside Sanarie’s wisps though he was pleasantly warm. Her light was warm, where his shadows were cool, he pulled back far enough to speak after his three kisses and said “My Sunshine”  
“Aaaaw, Azriel” Elain said, as she hazarded a look and turned around.  
“Incorrigible” Azriel said, turning over and stretching himself, to help dissolve the tension in his body, whilst he lay out on his back.  
Elain shrugged, “You deserve her, and from what I’ve seen’ Elain tapped between her eyes ‘she deserves you as well”  
He breathed out in surrender, he just had to accept that Elain would be like this for a while, happy for him, it could be far worse, so he’d take it, lying down as he was.  
“How long have I been out, I feel stiff and sore like I’ve been on my sick bed for days” Azriel asked.  
“It’s been 3 and a bit days, Madja has been visiting a few times a day and has left her Apprentice to care for you with our help. Troublemaker” Elain said, scratching under his stubbly chin once with her second finger.  
Azriel could see that her state if being between seriousness and playfulness, was her fear for him slowly melting away; he’d been in a bad way then.  
Rhysand appeared in the door, followed by Amren and Tao, it’d take Rhysand a bit to find her a pretty, nice smelling apartment close to a fruit market, so for now she stayed with him.  
“The tempestuous git’s alive then” Amren said, moving forward so that a bleating Tao could crawl onto the bed.  
“Tao!” Azriel exclaimed, and sat up reaching for the bat. He immediately regretted the action and lay back down as he clutched his head, which was throbbing in pain and felt so full of pressure that it would rip apart.  
Tao crawled up Azriel’s body slowly, trying to bite the wisps in the air, curious about them, the wisps danced away before they could be chomped and flitted back, tickling him behind his ears and under his chin, so he turned this way and that, trying to catch them in his mouth, but he always missed.   
“I think your females magic likes Tao” Rhysand said, amused by the sight, and increasingly curious about Sanarie’s powers and indeed the female herself, his cousin.  
“Headache? I have a tonic for that” Elain said, as she watched Azriel holding his head, massaging it.   
She disappeared for a moment behind the others and was back in a moment, holding a small clear vial, it looked safer than the last one, so Azriel took it and downed it in one.  
“Juice” was all Azriel said, demanding juice to rid him of the bitter taste in his mouth, although he'd take anything to rid himself of the bitterness.  
Elain looked sorry for Azriel and said “I only had that one glass”  
Azriel met Rhysand’s eyes and amused pity lit them as he waved his hand and a jug of juice appeared on the bedside table. Azriel grabbed the whole thing and drank straight from the jug, Tao snuggled Azriel’s chest and then lifted his head as some juice trickled down his neck, smelling the sweet liquid, he pulled himself closer and licked it up. Sniffing once all the juice was mopped up, Tao clambered up Azriel’s neck and face, until he was looking down on the jug holding his hair, Tao only had so much patience he pushed his head into the jug and started lapping up the juice.   
Azriel stopped drinking, pushed out by his batpup nephew, he shook his head and said “Excuse you greedy guts; you’re the portliest little fruit bat I’ve ever seen” he said scratching his belly while the bat continued to drink.  
“He’s not fat, he’s simply prepared for a few harsh winters” Amren said, in a defiant tone.  
“I said portly not fat, and I never said portly was bad” Azriel clarified, he lowered the jug and took Tao's paw off his hair, he already had a pounding headache and that wasn’t helping.  
Azriel pulled Tao away from the jug and set it down, Rhysand magiced it away before Tao could get into it again, and gorge himself on the stuff. Azriel lay back down and looked to his left, to his mate, it was hard to look away from her, harder even than it had been to look away from Mor. Although now he knew why he’d looked at Mor all those years, and it plagued him with guilt, that somewhere within himself he’d known all this time she existed. Instead of looking in every dark corner of himself and Prythian to find out why he had these feelings, he had just accepted that he wantonly loved Mor, even though she would never think of him like that; all the while his mate had suffered, because he hadn’t looked hard enough for her.  
Amren moved forward and took Tao from Azriel, cradling him in her arms, she stroked her fingers ever so lightly over his face and quickly his eye lids drooped and he fell asleep.  
“Bat Whisperer” Rhysand said, smiling amused at Amren and how easily she put her bat to sleep, she was the last female he’d have thought to have a motherly instinct.  
“It helps that he’s in a juice coma, but it does always work, it works on Fae babies too, I tried it on Atticus once, he wouldn’t stop screaming’ Amren said, rolling her eyes ‘I don’t know why any of you want Fae babies” Amren made a disgusted face.  
Rhysand chuckled, and turned back to Azriel who was still looking at Sanarie as he spoke.  
“Have you woken her at all?” Azriel asked, he reached over and brushed the backs of his fingers back and forth on her cheek, then ran his hand down her arm, wrapped his fingers around hers, he left it there as she slept.  
“No. All day today we’ve been trying siphons on her as she slept, but she burned them all out, turned them to dust” Rhysand said.  
“How many at once” Azriel asked, not able to look away from Sanarie.  
“We tried 7, then 9, even 12; all the best quality and nothing, all burned down to dust within seconds or minutes, so we’ve kept her asleep to be safe, until we can think of something to protect us from her, and her from herself” Rhysand said.  
Azriel took a deep breath, and said “I’m so tired” he closed his eyes to rest, and continued to hold Sanarie’s hand.  
“I’m not surprised, while you were sleeping your shadows surrounded Sanarie, protecting her, they grew more dull as time went on, and then they stopped, that was worrying but I think you were just spent, not dying” Elain said.  
“What was the poison? I assume Black Nightshade” Azriel said.  
“Yes, it was a potent concoction of the poison, we don’t think they realized how strong it was, it could have killed you. Her light surrounded you this whole time, just as your darkness surrounded her for a time. Madja said you healed twice as fast as someone afflicted with that poison usually would, and didn’t develop any of the more severe symptoms of a deadly case, she thinks Sanarie’s light has healing ability. Also, Mor stopped by the night it happened and depleted herself healing you, so you have been very lucky. If you consider it, you and Sanarie make sense; the greatest thing she needed from you her whole life was protection, the greatest thing you needed from her your whole life was healing. Think of your life and your duties in it and this court and how many times you’ve been battered and bruised, in need of healing; then think of her life, how often she’s needed protection” Elain said.  
Azriel looked at Sanarie wondering what she’d want or need if she was awake, he knew if she could she’d request just one of a few things; the boys, him close to her, Morrigan’s company or a kiss. He’d already kissed her, but if she could by chance hear them or feel him, he wanted her to know that he was sorry for her past and grateful to have her in his present. Azriel let go of her hand, so he could roll over and prop himself on his forearm, he cupped her face with his hand other hand and tenderly kissed her lips. Once he was done he whispered on her lips “I’m sorry I left when you begged me not to, I will never walk away from you again. I love you”  
Behind him Elain gushed like a little female, he looked over his shoulder and said “That is why I whispered it, busy bodies the lot of you” Azriel pulled up the covers and gently pulled Sanarie into his arms. He made sure her hair wasn’t tucked under her, pulling on her neck, he got her into the same altitude that she’d liked, when they would get back into bed in the mornings with their little males. Azriel looked up to see Elain with romantic doe eyes and exhaled in feigned frustration.  
“What did I miss” Feyre asked, as she shuffled in sleepily from the hallway.  
“Azriel kissed Sanarie three times earlier with such gentle tenderness, and called her “My Sunshine” I heard it all. Then just now caressed Sanarie’s face, held her hand, then after a while he leaned over her and kissed her so sweetly, then whispered “I’m sorry I left when you begged me not to, I will never walk away from you again. I love you” onto her lips, and then he pulled her into his arms and got her comfortable, it was so familiar and tender” Elain exclaimed, to Feyre, her happiness for Azriel and Sanarie barely contained.  
Feyre snorted and said “Only you would give me a romance novel blow-by-blow account of what I’ve missed”  
Azriel chuckled and said “You’re feeling better then”  
“I felt fine days ago” Feyre said, brushing off the concern, Rhysand already treated her like a paper doll, she didn’t need Azriel fussing too.  
Azriel nodded knowingly “So siphons won’t work, and she can’t be away from me, how do we fix this, I want her awake, and able to live, yesterday”  
“Well, there’s always one way to get obscure information” Feyre said.  
Rhysand breathed in, closing his eyes as he held his chin in a knowing way and said “Suriel?”  
“Yes” Feyre said.  
“You’re so predictable” Rhysand said, putting an arm around her and hugging her into him.  
“It has always worked, and usually when I needed information the most. Besides the revelations given, have always been so crystal clear” Feyre said, finishing with sarcasm thick in her tone, Suriels, or possibly only her Suriel which was no more; loved a good riddle.  
Elain sighed, her eyes were fixed on the head board and she started to speak, in her trance like voice “Pools of stone moonlight, 11 in total; eight moonlit fingers, two moonlit hooks, one moonlit eye; the tears of the moon fallen to earth” Elain swayed, Amren steadied her and she came back to herself blinking.  
“You okay” Feyre asked, reaching out to hold her hand.  
“Yes, it came on so fast and left so fast, like lightning, it rattled me, the intensity of it” Elain said, as Amren steered a chair behind her and gently pushed her down into it.  
“Elain, I suppose you don’t have any idea what the hell a ‘pool of stone moonlight’ is” Rhysand asked.  
“Afraid not” Elain said.  
“How about you Tiny Ancient One’ Rhysand asked, Amren shook her head. Rhysand continued ‘well, add that to the list of things to ask the Suriel. What is the darkness for one, how do we find help for Sanarie for two, and what is a pool of stone moonlight” Rhysand said.  
“Tomorrow we hunt then” Feyre asked, eager to leave the house again.  
“Yes, you and I will hunt the Suriel, maybe Madja can wake Sanarie and you two can be alone for a while, see how she copes with that, we can always put her back under if it’s too much for her” Rhysand said to Azriel who nodded in response.  
Madja’s attendant bustled in, with a tray of tonics, noting the two Elain had already given, she pulled back the blankets and started assessing Azriel, checking his skin, his eyes, then pinching between his big and second toe, to which he almost jumped off the bed.  
“What the hell” Azriel said.  
“Congratulations you get to keep your toes, most people lose theirs, in fact most people’s organs shut down and they lose their lives, you just look like a mortal who’s survived a bad illness. You’re a lucky male Shadowsinger, and whatever she is, along with Madja and The Morrigan healing you, likely saved your life and your toes, well, technically people’s organs shut down, the circulation slows and the body trying to keep itself alive diverts all blood to the organs and brain, leaving the extremities to blacken and die from the poison and lack of detoxified blood, then it attacks your organs and well you can imagine. I don’t think you’ll need any more medicine, but give him one more of these in the morning, and these as needed for any pain, lots of water and rest, I’ll appraise Madja in the morning” the female finished her tirade of terror, then with her last instructions handed Elain some vials and left, with the thanks and gratitude of them all.  
“And another trip to Lord Devlin’s camp, to find out what coward laced his blade with deadly poison” Rhysand said, sorry to be adding yet another item to their to-do list. He would have to go with Cassian, for damage control and reprimand, he may even take Morrigan if she was up for it after 2 days rest. Feyre and Amren would have to hunt the Suriel and he knew, Feyre trained as she was in battle, plus her immense and varied powers, then there was Amren who needed no explanation. Strength in numbers now that they were at war. Velaris would be shut up the way it was before the last war, and they’d travel in numbers, always with one who could winnow. With the mother’s luck and smart tactics, they could get out of this alive.


	26. Chapter 26

Azriel had recovered enough to have his well of power replenished, so they were going to wake Sanarie with his shadows ready to protect her from whatever happened when she was close to anyone but him. They had sat Sanarie up, propped against Azriel and a pile of pillows, so that she didn’t need to be moved upon waking. Madja administered a potion, and Sanarie began to stir, Azriel held her, feeling better in himself than the night before, but still nursing some aches and weakness which Madja said would be gone in time, likely faster than anyone else in his shoes.   
They’d drawn the curtains all to a point, the light wasn’t bright in the room, but it was more than enough for Sanarie to see who stood around her when she woke, Azriel didn’t want her to wake in a dark, unfamiliar room, unable to get her bearings.   
Sanarie took a deep sighing breath as if she hadn’t taken one in some time, she kept breathing like this, and her heart beats had definitely increased but not to a waking rate, Azriel realized she was panicking, he shifted her in his arms and tilted her head to him cradling her with his left arm and right hand, her eyes opened and Azriel spoke, trying to soothe her “It’s alright, you’re alive, you’re safe, the younglings are both safe, breathe out as much breath as you can, then slowly take air as deep as you can, it’ll help”   
As Sanarie managed to get air into her body after creating the space for it by exhaling fully, her heart slowed a little and she was able to croak out a few words “Azriel? Is Morrigan okay” Sanarie asked, the concern in her face was echoed by her heart which picked up pace once again, when she remembered her last thoughts, before Madja had intervened with that merciful sleeping draft.   
“She’s perfect, downstairs minding our little males. Breathe out again, as far as you can, then in again as far as you can, slowly” Azriel said, soothing her cheek and arm with his hands, making comforting motions.  
A squeak slipped past Elain’s lips and she stifled it with her hands over her mouth, as she mumbled past them “Sor-ry”, the scene before for her was already too sweet for her to bear in silence.   
“Hopeless” Feyre said, as Rhysand stood next to her and shook his head, chuckling.   
‘I need water’ Sanarie thought, her disused throat had just gotten out the first four words, but now she really needed water to continue talking, and she had questions.   
Azriel took a glass from the bedside and helped her drink some, she took a few gulps and then relaxed in his arms, before she straightened and realized she hadn’t spoken the need out loud.  
'Azriel?’ she ventured in her mind, reaching towards his.   
‘Yes, my sunshine' his reply came, as she looked at his face and his lips did not move.   
She gaped at him and said aloud “Is this normal”   
“For mates, yes” Azriel said, wishing he could kiss her, hold her and well, wishing he could have everything else with her as well, as he remembered the sound she made in the bath and thought he could listen to that sound, until it rang endlessly in his mind.   
Sanarie giggled and flushed bright red, hiding her face in his chest.  
Azriel realizing his embarrassing mistake, mirrored Sanarie’s color, which went to his ears, and snapped his mind shut, easing open only a crack of the door into his mind, so he could listen for her, and send her his thoughts in return.   
“Bloody Cauldron, they’re made for each other” Feyre said, marvelling at them flushed with embarrassment but still clinging to each other.   
“Aw, I told you, didn’t I, they’re so in love” Elain said.   
“Elain” Azriel said in warning, he didn’t want everyone else saying it about them, before they’d had a chance to say it to each other.   
Sanarie looked up at Azriel and shyly kissed his cheek, then buried her face into his neck, she still felt tired, even though she knew she shouldn’t be. Now that Sanarie was awake her wisps had left Azriel and surrounded her, as his did also, shielding her behind a wall of black and white wisps, “What time is it” she asked, the room in general.   
“Early” Amren’s short disgruntled reply came.   
“Well, I have to go deal with Devlin, he’s waited long enough to be reprimanded, and I have to take Morrigan and Cassian, because Feyre needs to catch a Suriel, and I’m sure as hell not letting any of you leave this city alone now that we’re at war’ Rhysand sighed. Behind him Azriel and Sanarie looked silently to each other, as he caught her up mind to mind, down their mating bond. Rhys continued ‘I’ve seen what you can do now Amren, I know you’re the perfect body guard to send with my mate. There’s plenty of reasons you’re my second, my terror in the dark” Rhysand said, winking at her, she bared her canines and growled a breathy noise.   
“Somehow less terrifying, when she tries to be terrifying” Feyre said, huffing a small laugh.   
Amren moved so fast that even to fae eyes, she was undetectable, Feyre whimpered more in shock than pain and held the fleshy part between her neck and shoulder, she removed her hand and said “She bit me” more in astonishment, than as an accusation.  
Rhysand raised his eyebrows at Amren and the room darkened and crackled with power, it was too far over the line, Amren looked sheepish standing in front of them and bit her second finger, she let her blood drip onto the light grazes and gently rubbed it over the area. By the time she pulled back, the only remnant of Feyre’s small injury was a drying smudge of Amren’s blood, and the wound on Amren’s finger had healed completely, leaving nothing marring her skin.   
“Amren, we do not bite our family, or friends and we certainly do not bite our high lady” Rhysand said, his Papa voice coming out, as Azriel had taught him to use with Amren when she stepped over the line.   
“I didnt bite her, if I’d actually bitten her I would have done far worse than leaving two grazes, but I wouldn’t do that. I just wanted to show what I can do, it was only a joke and a show” Amren said, in a quiet but defiant tone.   
“You’re worse than Azriel’s younglings” Rhysand said, it wasn’t a jibe, his tone was still tightly leashed fury.   
“And don’t you dare teach them to bite” Azriel said, still lying from the bed and looking far better for having his mate in his arms, awake and talking to him down their bond.   
“No one ever wants to spar with me” Amren said, sulking, but literally sulking; head down, lips pouting, toeing the ground.   
“Because you could snap us in half, in less than a second if you wanted or if you had a careless moment” Rhysand said.   
“I could, but I wouldn’t. No matter how much you tease me, I’d never hurt any of you” Amren said, she looked like small teenager standing up to her parents, Azriel thought it was because she was so tiny, but it was also her voice, she was passionate and emotional. She’d done the wrong thing, but her intentions hadn’t been bad, reflexive and impetuous, but not malicious.   
The complexity that was Amren post-war, and lost grace, was interesting and for some terrifying. It paid to be on her good side as ever, but at the same time, she was more playful, and had a naïve innocence about her. Today Rhysand knew her terrifying side would emerge if Feyre needed it, so he would send just the two of them to hunt Suriel; the most powerful lady since the fall of the life goddesses and death gods, and with her she had something equally formidable, that was Amren; who as it turned out could slaughter any enemies they came across, and then heal her high lady with her blood, if need be.   
Rhysand didn’t love the idea of people going off in groups of less than three, but it was Feyre and Amren, and together they were easily worth twenty good warriors, so he would let them go and keep a strong hold of the mating bond today, to feel Feyre, so that he’d know the second they needed aid.   
The most comforting thing about Amren? You can’t catch or kill what you can’t see coming.   
“When and how did you discover you have healing ability” Rhysand asked, in what Azriel recognized as fully fledged, give me the truth now, Papa voice.   
Amren’s face shot to the ground, and she fidgeted “Well, everything’s okay, nothing bad happened” she said, not looking up.   
“Amren” Feyre said, gently but firm, it was a warning not to skirt around it.   
“Is your hunger under control” Rhysand asked.   
“It was, but sometimes you don’t bite for hunger” Amren said, cringing and going silent.   
“Amren” Rhysand and Feyre said in unison, pressing her, they were visibly concerned. Azriel knew they were worried about another power scandal, if Azriel and Amren both had gone through a melt down in a close space of time, and they couldn’t keep it quiet the consequences could have repercussions on the war.   
“Varian, fuck, please don’t make me, it’s fine, I swear” Amren said. “You have to tell us, if we don’t know we can’t protect you or us from whatever happened” Rhysand said.   
“Do you want to write it down instead” Feyre asked.   
“No, I won’t put it in writing for Cassian and Morrigan to hold over me, for the rest of my existence” Amren said, snapping it out as she looked back up, shocked and angry at the idea.   
“Then you need to explain, in detail, so we know exactly what we’re dealing with and what kind of damage control needs to be done” Feyre said, again, being firm but fair.   
“There’s no damage, so you don’t need to control anything” Amren said in a whine, at the thought of having to explain in detail.   
“We’ll be the judge of that, do you want to go into another room” Rhysand said.   
“Pointless. Too many nosy fae ears in this fucking house” Amren said.  
“Now I know you don’t like it, but what if, just this once Rhysand or I went into your mind and saw it, so you don’t have to say anything, Cassian and Morrigan will never know a thing” Feyre said.   
Amren made very petulant noise and conceded defeat, “Fine, Feyre, that one can only barely be trusted above Cassian” Amren said, looking dejectedly at Rhysand.   
Rhysand looked away, he had managed to swallow the chuckle down, but he hadn’t been able to keep the smile from his face, it was too hard to keep his mask on around his family.   
Feyre went into Amren’s mind and Amren showed her the memories from the few months back, right before Varian had left her in the Night Court without warning and returned to Summer. Amren was straddling Varian and they were... connected, in bed, in her loft. It felt wrong being in this memory, but Amren was allowing it, so Feyre continued, with no small amount of reservation and respect for her mind and her memory.  
Between their rasping breaths and moans, Varian spoke “I’m close, do it”, he pulled his white hair over one shoulder and lent his head to the side  
“No” Amren said, she kept moving with him.   
Inside Amren’s mind Feyre wanted to crawl into a black pit and not see anymore, it felt so, so wrong, but she understood now why she hadn’t wanted to say it out loud, let alone put it on paper.   
“Please my love” Varian begged.   
“No, I won’t be able to stop” she insisted.   
“I’ll stop you, I beg you, do it” Varian said.   
Amren’s resolve snapped and in a heartbeat her canines were sunk into Varian’s neck and she was riding him and drinking him, it took mere moments and they were climaxing together, but it didn’t stop, until Varian had fallen back on the bed, Amren going with him, he was a dead weight on the mattress and barely breathing. Amren was still drinking, until there was almost no heartbeat, she must have come out of whatever trance she was in from the ecstasy of it, because she’d bitten through her lips drawing her own blood to snap herself out of it.   
Amren sat up enough to hover over Varian’s lips, small shallow breaths still passed his lips, she kissed his lips gently, whispering desperately onto them “No, no. I told you, don’t you dare die on me. Varian. Oh god, what do I do, Mother, please save him”   
Varian’s body sighed out, his heart stopped, and Amren screamed “No, no” she lay on his chest sobbing, the life sucked out of her also. Then against her head she heard a light quick ‘thud-thud, thud-thud’ and she sat bolt upright, staring open mouthed at his chest, his heart was beating again, beating like hers. Amren wound back her hand and slapped him across his face, his eyes opened, he breathed quickly, and his heart had picked up pace, it was faster than a fae heart, by quite a few beats, he came to his surroundings and grabbed Amren around her waist throwing her off of him.   
“Varian, it’s okay, I thought you died, but you didn’t” Amren smiled and moved back onto the bed with Varian, even as he crouched in a defensive stance on the bed, she approached cautiously, crawling and reaching out to touch his face with her fingers.   
He had a primal look in his eyes, starving and needful, be looked at her wrist, and turned his head to the side. In a flash he had her wrist to his mouth and had sank his canines into her wrist and drank. He quickly got impatient and moved to bite her neck, he groaned with the, faster flow of blood and drank deeper.   
“Holy Mother what have I done. Varian, you have to stop” Amren said, as she started to get dizzy, even her extremely accelerated healing couldn’t replace the blood faster than he was drinking it.   
Just as Amren was getting faint and seriously worrying for her own life and the lives of those in Velaris, a shimmer appeared in the room behind Varian, she blinked and tried to focus, and saw Tarquin standing with Cresseida.   
“I knew it, I felt something was wrong, my brother, what has she done to you” Cresseida said, of her brother.   
Varian turned on her and Tarquin, and Amren couldn’t see what happened as she fought to stay conscious, She heard screaming and yelling, then there were more people in the room, the struggling and breaking of things got louder and then she lost consciousness.   
Feyre pulled out of Amren’s mind abruptly, fury in her eyes as she came back to the room, and soon she was yelling at her “You thought this was nothing, fucking cauldron Amren, you didn’t HEAL Varian, you bought him back to life”.   
Rhysand moved forward out of his neutral stance and said “What”  
Feyre turned to him and said “They were fucking, he begged her to bite him, she did, they climaxed together for an unnaturally long time, until she drained him, he died and from what I saw and felt, she bit her lip to come back to her senses, then kissed him and her blood bought him back. But he didn’t come back Fae, and then, THEN Tarquin and Cresseida showed up and saved her ass, Tarquin didn’t bother to tell you or me and neither did YOU’ Feyre said, rounding on Amren, Mother only knew what This all meant, or why Tarquin and Cresseida, even Varian had kept this to themselves and welcomed Amren back, after what she’d done ‘I can’t even look at you. Go to your room and stay there until one of us comes to get you” Rhysand went and put his hand on Feyre’s back, and they watched Amren leave.   
Behind them, Rhysand heard panicked breathing and then Azriel’s voice “I’m taking her home, she needs peace and quiet, she can’t deal with this right now” Azriel said. He had started comforting her when Rhysand lost his temper with Amren and darkened the room, and he’d just managed to soothe her enough, but then the yelling started and Sanarie couldn’t take anymore. It had taken a week, and a near death experience, but the other shoe was finally dropping, and Azriel could see the beginnings of her hangover from trauma, at the Hewn City and now in Velaris, all because of her cruel father.   
“I’m sorry Azriel, Sanarie, none of us knew that would happen, this was supposed to be about supporting Sanarie, and now we have more damage control to do. Rhysand will take you and Sanarie, I’ll take Mor and the younglings, we’ll meet you there and then deal with this. The Suriel can wait” Feyre said, using her high lady position like she was born to it, Rhysand standing behind her looking at her with pride.   
“See you in a bit’ Rhys said, he kissed her neck and walked to Azriel and Sanarie, before he winnowed them to Azriel’s manor he said ‘for what it’s worth Feyre, Tarquin has pledged his support to us, I do not believe his intentions for concealing this are nefarious, but we must know where we stand” Feyre calmed a little and nodded to him, giving him a half smile “I know, Tarquin must have his reasons, we did not need another thing to deal with, least of all something we could have dealt with months ago”  
Sanarie’s difficult breathing turned to wheezing, she looked shaky and terrified trying to get a full breath, but being unable to, Azriel said, “Now, please”   
Without another word, but a glance to Feyre and some words down their bond ‘it will be okay, I love you... try not to kill her, she might let you just now' Rhysand winnowed them away.


	27. Chapter 27

Azriel broke away from Rhysand when they arrived in his entrance hall and said “Thank you’ he stopped before he winnowed and turned back to say ‘she needs me” he was asking for permission from his high lord, to tend his mate. He’d already been out of action for a week, but he needed longer, because she needed him longer. 

“Do what you can from here, take care of your mate, if I really need you, I know where to find you” Rhysand replied. 

He’d seen and felt Feyre in a similar condition, he knew he couldn’t and wouldn’t ask Azriel to walk away from his mate at a time like this, of anyone in Prythian his brothers deserved their mates, especially when that mate wanted them in return. He would work twice as hard, so that Azriel could have the time he needed, so that his cousin, who’d been through more than anyone should ever have to, could have the time she needed, to heal. He hoped they had enough time to allow for it, for enough healing before they had to start dealing with whatever Keir Darkbringer threw at them next. 

Azriel winnowed Sanarie to her room, to that space which was solely hers, and whilst dimmed by heavy curtains from the bright morning sun outside, the white aesthetics of the room made it feel gray, rather than pitch black. He put her on the bed laid against the lush spread of pillows, she couldn’t take a full breath, and exhaling was too laboured so his other trick wouldn’t work, she had gone into deep, gripping panic. The kind most people experience at least once in their life, which only let go on it’s own terms, sometimes within minutes, or on the darkest days; hours.

“What do you need, name it and it’s yours” Azriel said, feeling panicked in himself to see her in such distress. 

“Sun, trees, nature” Sanarie managed, they were the things she’d longed for after a lifetime of stone, cold and darkness. 

She had thought for some moments after waking that she would be fine, because she was finally safe from her tortuous father, the knowledge of that upon waking the first day had been like a long sigh out, after holding it for her whole life. Now safe from the endless dark of her fathers court and his magic, she had felt she was safe and she could forget about the past, but Rhysand using his darkness and power had triggered her fearful memories and she realized trauma was an insidious thing. 

Her trauma had given her a week of peace, and she’d slept through half of that, but as all things that live in the dark, they’re bought out when exposed to the light. Her liberation to safety and light hadn’t spared her from the echoes that were her memories of trauma, only enhanced them, drawing them out to be laid bear, to be delt with; and how did that even begin to be possible? 

She didn’t blame Rhysand for his actions and the reaction they’d caused in her, he was right to be angry, his mate had been mistreated by a dangerous creature, who needed to be shown who was the dominant force. And she knew Azriel would be the same, or more likely, far, far worse. 

Azriel picked her back off the bed, and his shadows came around them, before he winnowed them through the darkness of between space. They manifested deep in a valley glade, the thick canopy made the light perfectly tolerable to Sanarie, the half light was made by the huge trunked trees which had sprawling roots, and leathery leaves as big as Azriel’s palm.

Azriel put her down, back against one of the beautiful trees, the roots ran so high she could list to one side, and prop herself on them, she closed her eyes and felt the sturdiness of the tree supporting her, slowly she managed so calm and deepen her breaths. 

“Azriel? Why did you let go” Sanarie asked, she wanted to be in his arms, but he’d set her down and moved away. 

“You needed space to breathe” he said, surveying her worriedly. 

“Not from you” she said, looking sad. 

Azriel smiled and let out a small chuckle “Even from me, you’re breathing normally again, aren’t you?” he said. 

“but I don’t want you away from me” she said. 

“I’m right here, I won’t leave” he said. 

“Closer” she asked. 

Azriel walked the few short steps to her and sat in the root nook next to hers, he reached out his hand palm up and she placed hers in it. 

“You are very like Morrigan, but you’re smaller than she is” Azriel noted. 

“It’s likely just my posture” Sanarie said. 

“It’s not just your height, I have twirled Morrigan around a dance floor many times and her hand is bigger than this” Azriel said, gently moving her hand in his, mesmerized by how it felt to hold his mates hand in his.

“You don’t strike me as the dancing kind” Sanarie said, surveying him skeptically. 

“I don’t like it much that’s true, but I don’t lack the skill, I think I will love twirling you around a dance floor though” he said, smiling at the warm feeling the thought of it bought to his heart. 

Sanarie’s head fell at that “I can’t dance, I can barely walk” she said.

“Don’t say that, we’ll just do it differently than everyone else, that’s all” he said. 

“I don’t want to be different, I want to look in your eyes like other females get to when they dance with their male” she said, earnestness in her voice. 

It did something to Azriel, to hear her speak a metaphor about other females and their males, knowing she meant herself and him, claiming him as her male, however inadvertently. Warmth spread across his chest and down to, other parts, but he wouldn’t touch her, he wouldn’t seduce her, he didn’t want it to be like that between them, not for a while yet. 

Azriel stood and picked her off the ground “I’ll show you” he said, smiling at her. 

Sanarie chuckled a high happy sound and put her arms around him, as he hoisted her up, he put one arm around her back, and held her to his chest, she wrapped one arm around his shoulders and he took the other in his free hand and held it, then danced as he would if she could keep pace with him standing on her own feet. He held her so she was eye level with him, she never had to be like everyone else, he would see to it that she had everything she ever wanted, he would find a way. 

Sanarie’s embarrassed giggles turned to joyous laughter, as her mate made her believe in endless possibilities. 

Azriel stopped, at the sound of her laughter, it was a sound familiar to him; eight years after the first war, he'd started dreaming of that laughter. It had been a recurring dream, he’d always assumed it was Morrigan’s laugh, one he hadn’t yet heard because how could you be truly, joyously happy when you weren’t free? Azriel realized it had been her laugh this whole time. 

Sanarie stopped laughing, when she realized they’d stopped moving, she looked at Azriel and her face dropped “Oh, you look so sad, I wasn’t laughing AT you, I’m happy that’s all” she said, trying to cheer him, thinking his pride had gotten her laugh all wrong. 

“I’ve heard your laugh in my dreams, I never looked for you, I should have, I failed you; us both” he said, his heart broke, not from guilt, but from something intrinsically deeper, a grief of what could have been, for her and himself as well. 

“Perhaps it happened the times when Korazsa couldn’t get my medicine to me, my powers crept up and it tugged on our bond” she said, wondering out loud. 

“Yes, I suspect that’s it” he said, heart heavy, why hadn’t his power tugged back and shown him the truth? 

“We can’t change the past Azriel. What if only just finding each other now, means we win this war? What if it means we’ll have millennia together? What if you’d found me after the first war and I hadn’t made it through the second?” she asked in rapid succession. 

Azriel realized the stupidity of feeling any guilt, the grief he would let himself feel, but only for the period of one hour a day, until it left him. It was okay to grieve the time they’d lost, but it wasn’t okay to live there, otherwise he’d just be robbing her and himself of the time they had now, none of which was promised. 

“Wise, wise female” he said, looking at her and feeling both pride and gratefulness. 

She smiled at him and said “spin me until were both dizzy” then lent her head back in anticipation of being twirled in her mates arms. 

Azriel laughed with her now, and marvelled at her innocence, and wisdom; at how he’d never seen those two things live side by side so cohesively, within another before. To Azriel his mate was a marvel, she had been hurt and broken, probably more times than she could recall, but she was strong, and not even a little bitter. 

Azriel and Sanarie had spent the preceding day in the foothills behind his manor, he had twirled her until they were both dizzy, then had laid with her on his chest, in the summer flowers of the shady glade. Told her stories, told her of the traditions she could look forward to, told her she could do what she wanted, that she would have everything she needed to be healthy and happy. He’d kissed her, held her, listened to her few good memories, and the horror stories of her life which made her break down and cry, he understood her better by the time he’d carried her sleeping to her bed and laid her out beneath the covers. The night air was turning cold, so he lit her fire, and made himself comfortable next to her above the covers. He fell asleep listening to her heart beats and peaceful breathing. The days spent in his manor, before she and Atticus were shot in the sky, had been hectic, and full, as days spent caring for younglings naturally were, but this day had been theirs, to talk and listen, with time for both uninterrupted. 

As Morrigan, and Elain, likely aided by Sorca, cared for their little males, giving them the time they needed.


	28. Chapter 28

"How did it go" Feyre asked, when Rhysand appeared in the entrance hall after his early visit to Windhaven and Lord Devlin. She stood putting the finishing touches on a gift box, which had arrived late the night before, from the joint efforts of the blacksmith and seamstress.

"Naturally, Devlin asked for things he knew he wouldn't get, so we finished by settling on him getting some things he will need. His payment for the inconvenience of Azriel's temper, will be extra supplies for the coming winter" Rhysand said, already sick of the day, but knowing another visit out of Velaris, to Tarquin would be necessary today, as Amren's transgression needed to be talked over with Tarquin, and possibly smoothed over too. He had planned to send his second with his mate, to hunt the Suriel for answers they couldn't find elsewhere, but that would be put off for another day.

"What did he ask for initially?" Feyre asked, curious and suspecting the answer.

"He wanted their females back' Rhysand paused as Feyre snorted and shook her head 'that was basically my reaction, so predictable. He even asked for the annual seizure for of-age females to cease, as if that was going to happen. I took some girls to be clear that those kinds of demands would never be met, I asked them in their minds to be sure, and every young female I asked who looked of age, wanted to leave with me" Rhysand said, looking pleased with himself as Feyre laughed.

"Oh, Devlin and his camp would have loved that' the levity left Feyre's face, replaced by a serious considering look 'We may need those supplies you promised him for the war" Feyre said, sounding mildly concerned. If the war lasted months or longer, they would need those supplies.

"I know, I'll start making arrangements now, in the event we do need them. For now though, it will keep him in line, as for keeping his entire camp in line, after what Azriel did, I reminded them that they'll be grateful for his wrath when the war comes and they're fighting side by side with him. They were also shamed for not being able to take him down, even in a rattled state, they claim they can't train as hard without their indentured females to look after them" Rhysand said, looking irritated at the memory of the morning spent with his uncultured mountain subjects.

"Where is Cassian, you didn't leave him there?" Feyre said, thinking Deviln and his camp needed time to calm down and possibly choose a side in the war, before anyone went there alone.

"I sent him to Azriel's. Before the declaration of war and the chaos which ensued, Azriel had wanted him to teach Sanarie some self-defence. I don't think he could bear to teach her himself, to handle her the way he'd need to in order to teach her how to protect herself" Rhysand said.

"I'm not sure he should watch then, he won't like seeing Cassian manhandle her either, I know he'll be gentle at first but if she's to defend herself, he will have to show her what that will look like" Feyre said, remembering Azriel's already unstable outbursts upon learning of Sanarie's violations; first at dinner, then learning her true mother's race, and how both females had been butchered.

"I also discovered the owner of the poisoned blade, turns out a buddy of one of the warriors in training has been making the poison himself, I have liberated him from Devlins camp and he will live and work at the Valaris Barraks, under Cassian's watchful gaze. Whatever the blacksmith makes for the weapons stores for the coming war, will be laced with his concoctions; he has many apparently. I've offered him lodgings, decent pay, and access to the city, an untrained alchemist with more talent than I've seen in a long while. I will be directing him to one of the master alchemists, perhaps together they can create some advantages for the conflict with Keir" Rhysand said.

"Some morning" Feyre said, sliding the box, and attached note into a bag.

"What is that?" Rhysand asked, trying to peak in the bag.

"It's for your cousin, we need to stop there before we go on to meet Tarquin" Feyre said, gently slapping his hand away.

"Let's get our ancient, demon, teenager and go then" Rhysand said, and smiled as he enjoyed Feyre's replying laugh.

"One of these days you'll be glad I'm terrifying" Amren said from the door, Tao clinging to her arm.

"I'm glad of it every day, although if you bite my mate again, I may have to mist you" Rhysand said, finishing in a serious tone.

Amren bared her teeth at Rhysand and made another failed attempt at a growl.

"Oh, no, please, so terrifying, don't eat me" Rhysand said, in a dry sarcastic lilt.

Feyre rolled her eyes amused at their exchange and said "Leave Tao here Amren" not knowing what they'd be walking into, they did not need anything happening to Amren's equivalent of a youngling.

Amren sighed and zipped away without a sound, within moments she was back and holding out her hand "Ready" she said in a chirpy tone.

"We are running an errand before we go to Summer. Race you to Azriel's" Rhysand said, leaning in and smiling a cheeky smile.

"Don't run into anyone!" Feyre yelled after Amren as she disappeared out the front door.

Rhysand grabbed the bag Feyre had been preparing, and wrapped his arm around her waist, then winnowed them to Azriel's front garden.

Amren stood at the top of his front steps, arms crossed across her chest looking smug.

Their jaws fell and Rhysand said "Not fair"

"Not possible" Feyre said, as the front door swung open behind Amren.

Atticus and Alistair ran out excitedly and hugged Amren's legs, "Auntie Amren" Alistair said.

She didn't move her arms from her chest, as she growled again, glaring down at the younglings, who giggled at her and played peek-a-boo around her back.

"Keep trying terror in the dark, you'll master your primal growl" Cassian said, slapping her on her shoulder.

She huffed defeated, and grabbed up the younglings "One day, you're going to tell your kids horror stories about me" Amren said to the younglings in her arms, she took them into the ground floor playroom and set them down.

Rhys and Feyre following behind, looked at each other, doing their best to stifle the laughs trying to squeeze out their throats.

"Are they up yet" Feyre asked Cassian in the entrance hall.

"Not yet, I'm leaving a note, if she feels up for some training later they can send for me. I have a budding alchemist to swear into the service of Velaris" Cassian said, sliding the note into the bag Feyre was leaving on a table in the entrance hall.

"That will not be safe there' Morrigan waved her hand and the bag disappeared 'for my sister I assume, I'll give it to her later" she said.

"Thank you, how is she" Feyre said.

"Haven't seen either of them, I'm thinking no news is good news" Mor said.

"This was a flying visit, we have to get to Summer, to meet Tarquin" Rhysand said, taking Feyre's hand, waiting for Amren, who was playing "ghost" with Azriel's sons. A game she played with them, where she ran around the room so fast she was undetectable, and they had to guess where she was by pointing; they never won.

"Amren, we have to go" Feyre called.

"Hugs Auntie Amie" Atticus said.

"If you can catch me you can have a hug" Amren said, as she disappeared and then reappeared at Rhysand's side.

Little crying voices were heard and Alistair said "That's not fair, we'll never catch you"

Amren sighed and said "oh fine" she walked over and pulled them both into a hug.

They snuggled her and kissed her cheeks then she let go, with a small smile, then a wink and they ran away to play.

"What horror stories will they tell their children about you again?" Rhysand said.

"You wait til I have free reign to kill in this war and then you'll see, Feyre can immortalize me in one of her paintings and then those babies will tell tales" Amren said.

Rhysand held out his hand to Amren and said "Time to face the music, again" she rolled her eyes, within moments of darkness they had arrived in the Summer court entrance hall.

As this was an official visit of sorts, they had set an hour to meet and do things properly, but it soon became apparent that Tarquin was late or not greeting them at all. He should have been there waiting, but nothing, not even guards to meet and escort them. Amren's ears must have picked up something out of ordinary in what was now a familiar place to her, because she disappeared, Rhysand and Feyre caught her up, winnowing to keep up with her scent. They found Amren in the throne room, face to face with Varian, "You smell delicious" he said, sucking air into his mouth near her neck.

"Don't you dare bite me" Amren said.

Varian closed his eyes and sniffed deeply, smelling Rhysand and Feyre as they entered, he turned hungry eyes on them and disappeared.

Rhysand didn't have time to blink, before Amren appeared and ripped Varian to a halt, it looked like she had pulled herself and him, out of thin air. She held Varian by the neck, pinned to the floor mere feet from Rhysand, he put Feyre behind his back instinctively protecting his mate.

"I told you to feed him well, on good, clean, non-magical blood, 2hrs before we arrived" Amren snarled behind her to Tarquin.

"We did" Tarquin said, in a short, clearly irritated tone.

"And did you watch him drink it all?" Amren asked.

Tarquin looked to Cresseida, she looked away, it had been her job, she'd volunteered for it and she'd not done it.

"They needed to see him at his worst" Cresseida said.

Tarquin looked angry as he addressed Cresseida's insubordination, "Luckily for Rhysand and Feyre, Varian's maker is stronger and faster than he is. And lucky for us, our lines are drawn and guards are ready" Tarquin said, clearly pulling rank with his high lord demeanour, he knew things could have turned out far worse.

Rhysand looked around the room at the aligned warriors, the biggest that Summer had to offer, which stood around the large room, with a row of 3 warriors deep in front of Tarquin and Cresseida.

"Blood, now' Amren said, as Varian struggled, she looked up at Rhysand before she continued 'go stand behind the wall with Tarquin"

It was then Rhysand noticed in front of the warriors before the throne, there was a shimmering blue divide, he didn't care to ask just now, he wanted his mate safe, Tarquin winnowed, grabbed Rhysand and Feyre and winnowed back inside the safety of the magical wall.

"No matter what happens, stay behind the line" Tarquin said, resuming his throne.

Rhysand and Feyre were offered seats on the elevated platform next to Tarquin, they could see over the heads of the guards, and before them a line of blood across the floor.

Tarquin was watching Rhysand and Feyre take everything in, and upon seeing their shock at the blood line on the floor, realizing it ran across the floor, up the walls, and even across the ceiling. Tarquin addressed their first encounter with what Amren had created "He cannot cross a line made of blood magic, unless invited"

"Why didn't you tell us, we would have helped you" Rhysand said.

"Varian asked us not too, my loyalty still remains first and foremost with my family and my inner court, you and I are still allies Rhysand, but you are not my first consideration, no matter how my cousin has changed he is still Varian, he is still my kin" Tarquin said.

So it was as complicated and simple as that, he'd simply been asked not to say anything about the change in Varian, likely a promise Amren had also made. It scared Rhysand that she chose keeping Varian's secret over telling himself and Feyre of the danger.

"Varian becomes feral when he hasn't eaten, and for a time after he has had blood, the blood creates a surge of anger and thirst and he is uncontrollable, save for trapping him in his cave or Amren, he cannot be controlled. Amren has been a considerable curse, but we believe she will also be a blessing when the time comes" Cresseida said, looking at her brother with resigned sadness, he would never be the same again, but there was still love in her eyes.

"When the time comes for what?" Feyre asked.

"Darkness is stirring in the West, on The Continent, your little war with Keir Darkbringer will seem like a squabble between children, if the hold on that darkness breaks" Cresseida said.

"How do you know about the darkness?" Rhysand said.

"Your creature: Bryaxis and Varian are; friends. Varian can see and speak to him without fear or death, likely your creature Amren can also" Cresseida said, disdainful scowl marring her beautiful brown face.

"What" Rhysand said, in-eloquently, hardly fathoming what he was hearing.

"It's a rather long story, just watch we can discuss the rest later" Cresseida said, turning her eyes back to Varian and Amren.

A guard had entered, handed Amren a large jug of blood and then stood behind the blood line, Amren flipped Varian on his back and started pouring the blood down his throat.

"I want Fae blood, not human filth" he snarled.

"You cannot have magical blood and you know it. Drink and be sated with this, otherwise I'll force feed you pigs blood, from a pig riddled with parasites, and make you beg for human blood" Amren said.

A rumbling growl rattled from Varian's fist clenched throat, before he began drinking -for what it was worth, Varian was terrifying, and Amren was stronger and faster than he.

Once he had finished drinking, Amren set aside the jug, and released him.

Varian crouched and surveyed the room, the Bloodthirst glimmered in his eyes as the hunger turned to fury, colouring his irises to blood red. He moved in a flash, and had pulled a guards elbow, just the tip of it hadn't been inside the lines, the guard flew out of the protection wards, and Varian had him canines sunk into his neck drinking before anyone could blink, they didn't even see Amren catch him by the back of Varian's neck as he drank furiously.

"Varian as your mother I command you to stop" Amren said, in a commanding tone, Varian stopped drinking and pulled away from the guard.

Feyre and Rhysand exchanged looks and words silently down their bond, 'Mother?' Feyre said to Rhysand.

'Poor Varian' Rhysand replied, thinking of the lovers he and Amren were and her now commanding him as his mother.

'What is she' Feyre asked rhetorically, still speaking silently down the bond between them.

'Mother only knows. Amren doesn't even know and she's older than Prythian' Rhysand said.

Amren picked up, then tossed the guard at some soldiers by the window alcoves, Varian's eyes were blood red as before, but after drinking the guards Fae blood they glowed, making him look even more malevolent.

Varian was staring hungrily at Amren, and she watched him in return with a predators keen eye.

"Don't, even, think about it" she said, reading him.

He disappeared, her eyes tracked him and she punched him out of mid air, he flew and hit the opposite barrier, the guards flinched as he hit the shimmering wall in front of them, but they needn't have, the blood magic held.

Varian fell to the floor a short distance from where he'd bounced off the wall, he got up and came at Amren again, she uppercut him out of invisibility and he launched into the ceiling, leaving a gaping hole to the sunlight, this time when he fell with chunks of rubble falling with him, he had to shake himself off when he hit the ground.

He did however get up and come for her again, Amren pulled him out of thin air by his throat, and held him back against her chest so he couldn't escape her or grasp her.

"Enough, or I'll begin snapping limbs" Amren said in his ear.

Varian relaxed in her arms, and said "I missed you, my love".

At this Amren softened as Varian had, he used it to throw his head back and crack her in the face with the back of his head, blood spurt out her nose, and she released him. She threw her palm out hitting him in the middle of his back with the full force of the heel of her hand, he rocketed forward and hit the back wall of the throne room, rubble crumbled around him.

Amren was still with cold rage, fists clenched at her sides ready to strike a blow, she'd been playing with Varian, given him a chance to attempt to control his bloodthirst; he had failed.

Varian disappeared and this time so did Amren, when they reappeared, Varian was bloody and screaming, the pain dulled the glow of his eyes, but not entirely.

"As your mother' she paused thinking for a moment and then continued 'and only your mother, I command you to stop; just sit still and breathe" Amren said, drawing the line deliberately in the sand between them. They were no longer lovers, it couldn't be, she had created a monster, one she had to control at times of bloodthirst and she needed to always hold that superiority.

Amren walked to him and popped his dislocated joints back into place, and manipulated his bones into place, he screamed and Cresseida stood, wanting to go to him, but knowing she couldn't.

"Lay down and be still while your body regenerates" she said.

Varian looked defeated, angry, but he sat still staring at Amren, there was no lovers gaze in his eyes, hate and disdain, but nothing more than that.


	29. Chapter 29

***NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!! Explicit Content!!!***

Sanarie woke mid morning to find the other side of the bed mussed. She washed and dressed in an underdress, but before she could choose a dress she noticed the gift box that had appeared at the end of her bed.

Dear Sanarie,  
Our High Lady commissioned this corset for your use. You must only use it in waking hours, give your body a rest when you're sleeping or resting. Your sister provided us with your measurements, after the declaration, if anything is uncomfortable, do let us know and we will work with you to make adjustments; we are at your disposal at any time, now and in the future.  
You can find us almost every day uptown on Velaris High Street.  
Here to help whenever you need,  
Faran Blacksmith and Sheela Patternmaker & Seamstress.

Behind the note was a set of instructions, detailing how the corset was to be used.  
Instructions:  
Self tightening corset, put on the corset and lie flat on your stomach, get your body (breasts) comfortable, and pull the silver toggled laces away from the back to tighten until firm, but still comfortable. Double bow knots to secure. -Sheela

Sanarie had tried a corset in the past, it had been an old one that she'd found, it hadn't fit her, but it helped to brace her back, which lessened the pain, it also helped her to walk taller, if only a little.  
When her father found out about it she had paid the price for trying to mitigate her circumstances, when her father believed she should live with her lot, without complaint or aid. Her father cut the corset off her, then she was whipped and her ears cut; she never dared to wear another, even though it had helped with the pain.  
Sanarie chose her clothes for the day, a long old style dress. It was a soft white cotton, embroidered with a green field of flowers around the hem, around the long sleeves, petals were being scattered from a rose, by an unseen breeze. The V collar was left plain, and Sanarie draped her beloved necklace from Morrigan around her neck.  
Sanarie decided to wear the corset over the dress, because it was not only practical, but beautiful as well; embroidered with silver thread, in swirling patterns, she noted they were reminiscent of the white swirls of whips floating around her.  
The corset was easier than she'd imagined to put on, once she felt comfortable with the security of being held by the corset, she was nervous, but ready to stand. Sanarie pushed herself off the bed, and stood up, it felt strange to be fully upright, her balance was off and she stumbled into her dressing room, to see herself in the mirror. She really did look like Morrigan, and Azriel was right, she was more petite than her sister, but the resemblance was uncanny. She took herself in, turning this way and that, tear began to sting her eyes, she felt like the female she always knew she was underneath the poverty, the broken body and the invisibility of servitude.  
Her smile was big and she felt joy, something which had been rare to her, before she'd been liberated to Velaris and the care of a Family, she'd never expected to be hers.  
She felt anxiety rise and grip her chest, when she remembered the day before, telling Azriel of her past, would he look at her differently now? Would she fall apart again? She was afraid to show how tired she was, it wasn't a normal tiredness, it was bone deep exhaustion which hit her at different times in the day. When she was near him she felt better, but most of the day she just wanted to go back to bed.  
Behind her Sanarie heard the sound of a smashing tray of china, she whipped around and saw Azriel, staring at her in disbelief.  
"How" he asked.  
"Feyre" Sanarie said.  
Azriel went to hold her, remembering the anxiety in her eyes when she'd heard the tray smash.  
"I scared you, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have winnowed in" he said.  
"I still feel on alert all the time, I know I'm safe with you, it's just the fear of everything from daily life of the past... it's hard to break away from" she said.  
"I'd be surprised if that anxiety didn't catch up with you, it'll remain as long as it does and we'll deal with it; together" he said.  
"Kiss me?" Sanarie said.  
Azriel beamed at her before he leaned in and kissed her good morning, he'd been excited to kiss her from the moment he saw her. Kissing Sanarie, holding her gently, not supporting her, but feeling her as her own entity within the circle of his arms, knowing she had some freedom with her newfound ability, made him happy for her and grateful to Feyre for having the care to think of it.  
"I can look you in the eyes" Sanarie said to Azriel, looking up at him, not realizing it would mean that much to her.  
Sanarie started to tear up, Azriel seeing it replied "now you can hypnotize me all day, every day"  
Sanarie laughed and leaned into him, marvelling at the feeling of fitting right under his arm.  
"Can we go out for breakfast? Is it safe" Sanarie asked.  
"Yes, Rhysand and Feyre bought home guards from Summer, to double the city guard numbers, it's safe" Azriel said.  
"I lost those glasses and hat when I fell from the sky" Sanarie said.  
"You have plenty of others" Azriel said, letting go of her to open a door in her dressing room, it was full of hats, glasses, gloves, bags, parasols everything and anything she could need to leave the manor.  
Sanarie walked slowly, stumbling a little, Azriel watched her closely but didn't interfere with her learning how to use her new-found able body. She stood slightly open-mouthed, as she touched a few things "You bought me all of this?" Sanarie said.  
"Yes and no, some was Morrigan, some was sent by Elaine and Feyre, Nesta left you that" Azriel pointed to a small trunk.  
Sanarie knelt before it and opened it, it was full of books, for her enjoyment, and some for children, Nesta had thought of her little males. There was one rather large volume with illustration, which was all about Velaris.  
"I believe she realizes her mistake, that is about as close to an apology as you're likely to get" Azriel said.  
"You all have scars from the war she is no different, I don't blame her, I hope she and I can be friends now, or at least friendly' Sanarie said, feeling gratefulness in her heart, as she took out the large volume 'can we read this over breakfast? I'd love to see all the places I can go" she said, knowing as she held that book, that Azriel's words were the truth. Nesta had given Sanarie a guide to her city; that was trust,l from the female who assumed her a spy.  
Azriel took the book from her as his answer and offered her his other hand, she took it and rose, a task made considerably easier with her bracing corset.  
"Which items are from Elaine? I'm wearing Morrigan's necklace, and Feyre's corset, so I'd like to wear something from her" Sanarie said.  
Azriel took a white straw hat with a green sash from the shelves, it was tied at the back in a bow, with glass flowers nestled behind "This has Elaine written all over it, the matching accessory to that lovely dress' Azriel said offering it to Sanarie, she took it and put it on. Then he found some glasses, in an old style, round with white gold filigree arms 'These are from me" he said, putting them in her hands.  
"They're beautiful" she said, admiring them before she put them on.  
"Not as beautiful as you, but still" Azriel said.  
She smiled at that, her heart skipped a beat, no one ever spoke words like that to her and no one ever looked at her the way he did. Sanarie leaned into him removing her hat, relishing her ability to hold her glasses in one hand, and her hat in the other, not needing to brace herself against him or his shoulders, she stood and kissed him, long and sweet. She heard his heart skip then and his breath catch, she giggled at that, then distractedly said 'shoes, I forgot shoes".  
Azriel chuckled at her, opened another cupboard and Sanarie chose a pair of flat sandals, which would grip her feet well.  
"Sit" Azriel commanded gently.  
Sanarie sat and he placed the heavy book in her lap, as he fitted the shoes to her feet "They fit perfectly" Sanarie said.  
"Morrigan is responsible for all the shoes, I felt something as important as shoes, should be left to someone who knew them well, all I know is a warriors quality leather boot" Azriel said.  
Sanarie laughed and felt grateful these small things were taken care of, she realized when basic needs were met, they were security and comfort; balms to an anxious heart.  
Azriel took the book from Sanarie's lap and held out his arm "Shall we my lovely?"  
Sanarie beamed "You've never called me that before"  
"You are lovely" he said, bending back her hat brim to kiss her gently beside the mouth.  
"Mmm" she hummed her appreciation of his tender kiss.  
Azriel winnowed them to a street he knew to be shaded with thick canopied trees, and used his shadows as extra cover "We can start here and see how you go. If we go left we'll end up in the square by our manor, if right, we'll end up in a different part of the city altogether, whatever you like" he said.  
"I'd like to see the manor, and our neighbourhood" Sanarie said.  
Azriel smiled wide and took her arm "Our neighbourhood it is"  
As they walked through the streets filled with the sounds of children playing, the sights of parents gardening and that peaceable noise of living, Sanarie began to fall in love with her new home.  
Walking through the square was a louder experience, vendors calling to customers, bartering in animated tones, parents trying to wrangle kids trying to run for their favourite stalls. Sanarie took it all in, the vendors, selling mostly the plants and fresh flowers, they were known for, along with some clothing, food and trinkets. Everything was colorful and everyone bore smiles.  
Once she had walked from one side to the other, she could take in their manor in all it's splendour.  
It sat nestled in the foothills, with a high wall clearly cut from the hills, which wrapped around the side of the manor, each level of the building, had a terrace of greenery and flowers, it looked both hulking over the square, and blended into the hillside.  
"Which one is our terrace" Sanarie asked.  
"See the white wisteria, around the portico on the third teir?" Azriel said.  
"I see it" she said.  
"That's ours" Azriel said.  
"You bought this for us, before you even knew our bond existed" Sanarie said, leaning on Azriel's arm.  
"Yes" he said, unable to hide his emotion at her meaning.  
Sanarie broke away from Azriel, as he looked down at her, she walked quickly towards the wall.  
"Don't you dare!" she yelled up at the third teir.  
Azriel tore his gaze from his mate to their terrace garden, to see Morrigan wrestling with two little males, one bopped her on her head with a wooden sword and caught off guard the smaller of the two got away and jumped.  
"Atticus!" Sanarie yelled, both in worry and chiding. Not just his jump off the huge height, but hitting his Auntie on the head to accomplish it.  
Azriel appeared in the air beneath him, just as he cried out and his one wing failed him. Azriel caught him and flew him down to Sanarie, Atticus all but lept into her arms.  
She wished she was up on that terrace so Alistair wouldn't miss out, his struggling was just as voracious as his little brother.  
Everything went white, and warm, it was so bright she closed her eyes tight and held a hand over Atticus' eyes, the ground went out from under her feet and she screamed in terror and then she felt it return.  
"You can winnow, and walk upright" Morrigan said from beside Sanarie.  
She snapped her eyes open and looked around, through the light spots blared into her vision she could see she was in the third floor terrace garden, with Atticus, Morrigan and Alistair; who ran for her.  
She knelt down and held both her little males "You.' She said looking down at Atticus, he looked up at her sheepishly, she removed her glasses but not her hat 'You hit Auntie Morrigan on the head with your sword and then jumped when I told you, don't"  
"I love you mama" Atticus said.  
"That's not fair' she said, smiling at him, kissing Alistair's head 'I love you too', she pulled Atticus into her and kissed his cheeks, 'Naughty, naughty, you better go kiss Auntie Morrie better"  
"Okay mama" he said, he ran to Morrigan, she knelt down and he gently pulled down her head and kissed the top "Sorry Auntie Morrie"  
"You're lucky your cute" Mor said.  
"And I love you too Alistair" Sanarie said, before kissing both his cheeks, Sanarie stood up, putting Alistair down and backed away, she had started to feel and hear music and it's emotion, the words had been climbing up her throat, then Azriel's shadows came around her and they stopped.  
"No more touch until mama can control her powers" Azriel said next to her, he'd arrived at some point when she was holding their little males. Likely he was as scared as she was when she'd disappeared.  
Sanarie leaned into Azriel feeling dizzy after her little males songs left her; sad, heartbreaking songs.  
"I'm sorry babies, I love you both" she said, tearing up.  
She looked at Morrigan, and the same fear she felt was mirrored in her sisters eyes, fear that Morrigan's song would come to her and that she'd sing it again, hurting them both.  
It broke her heart seeing the sadness, and rejection in Alistair and Atticus faces.  
"Can you wrap your darkness so tight around me that I can hug them goodbye" Sanarie asked Azriel.  
He nodded "it'll feel cold, as is the nature of darkness, if you shiver I'll have to pull you away"  
Sanarie nodded, and moved forward, Azriel's shadows bound so tight around her she felt them burrow into her skin, it made her cold and dizzy, but she pushed her warm light back against it, to stave off a chill so she could hold her babies as long as possible.  
The little males crawled into her arms when she knelt on the ground.  
"please stay mama, we won't touch you we promise" Alistair said.  
"I have to go, but I will work hard, so I can come home as soon as possible" she said, tears slipping from her eyes.  
Atticus started crying, he held onto her so tight it broke her heart; it was how she had held onto her mother's body, after she'd died in that cell beneath the Hewn City.  
"No mama, no" Atticus said.  
"Please stay" Alistair said, his quiet sincere request cutting a fresh slice in her heart.  
"I just winnowed and I don't know how, I could accidentally do other things, and hurt you, I need to learn to control my powers, and what those might be. I could have other powers that are dangerous and I don't want to hurt anyone I love" she said, bracing herself against the cold sinking into her skin, as her light diminished and shrunk back, as her heart broke.  
"Morrigan will be your mama until I get back" Sanarie looked at her sister and she nodded.  
"She does look like you mama" Alistair said.  
"Yes she does, let that be a comfort to you while I'm gone" Sanarie said.  
Sanarie was so cold, she felt like Azriel's shadows had dug into her bones, she shuddered.  
"Sanarie" Azriel warned.  
"I know, just one more minute" she said, before her body betrayed her and she began to shiver uncontrollably.  
"Kiss mama good bye, I will bring her home to you I swear it" Azriel said.  
They kissed Sanarie and Morrigan stepped forward and scooped them up "How about an ice cream and then, a warrior lesson with my friend Nalum?"  
The boys nodded, a little light lifting their sad faces.  
"Who's Nalum, can she be trusted with my babies" Sanarie asked, through chattering teeth.  
Azriel's warm arms came around her gently pulling her off the ground and against his body, his shadows already pulled away from her, but she was still so cold.  
"Nalum is a good female, she will take care of all of them" Azriel said.  
Sanarie nodded, she looked at her boys before they disappeared with Morrigan "I love you, I'll see you" she said, she thought it would be the right thing, but it wasn't as they disappeared their little faces burst into tears once more.  
Sanarie broke down, crying and shivering, "What's wrong with his wing? Did it not heal fully?" Sanarie asked.  
"He's young, it has only been a few days, he will heal fully" Azriel said.  
"What if he doesn't" she asked, holding onto Azriel as he walked inside with her.  
"He will" he assured her.  
Azriel moved some items to between space, then winnowed himself and Sanarie to the greenhouse higher on his property in the foot hills.  
He sat Sanarie leaning against a window in full sun, she groaned with the heat of the position as she continued to shiver with the bone deep cold.  
"You could kill someone using your shadows like that" Sanarie said.  
"I have" he said, not with pride or regret, he stated it as fact.  
"I can see that. What if I can burn someone with my light? What if I accidentally did it to Alistair or Atticus?" she said, wary of her powers.  
"That's a possibility I hadn't thought of" Azriel said, focused on rustling something nearby.  
Sanarie opened her eyes to see what her mate was doing, he had lit a fire in a clay brazier, near an opening in the glass at the other end of the greenhouse, and prepared what looked like a bed of furs over some garden beds in the middle.  
"What are you doing" Sanarie asked.  
"Do you really need to ask that when you're still shivering? I'm going to hold you, and this is the warmest building to do that in, once you're beneath the covers it won't be so bright and we can remove the hat and glasses. May Elaine forgive me for destroying her garden bed" he said the last words as a prayer.  
"The note said I have to take the corset off if I'm at rest or sleeping" she said.  
Azriel walked to her and picked her up, put her in the bed and magiced the corset away.  
"Close your eyes and put your head under the furs' Azriel said, as she did so, he sent her hat and glasses with the corset 'it would be best if we were as close to skin on skin as possible, do you want a shirt to wear? I can keep some cotton pants on" he said, hoping not to startle her.  
"No, it's okay, I don't care, I just don't want to be cold anymore" she said, shivering but not getting any closer to being warm, there was one way she could warm up fast and she knew she'd enjoy it.  
Azriel's clothes disappeared; all of them and he climbed in the bed with her.  
"Help me take my dress and chemise off" Sanarie asked, her inhibition gone, she just wanted to be warm, and being naked in Azriel's arms seemed like the perfect place to start.  
Azriel's magic disappeared her clothes, to between space with his "You let me know how close you want me" he said, sliding his arm under her neck.  
Sanarie turned over snuggled into his chest and the patch of curly black hair there.  
"Careful where you put your knees" he warned.  
She ran he hand down his front, until she felt the rise of thick hair before his parts, be drew in his breath and pulled her hand away "Don't" he said, he wanted her so badly, if she tried that again or actually got a hold of him he knew he wouldn't be able to resist. Holding her naked in his arms was hard enough.  
"We could make out, that'll help" she said.  
"I would love that, but it may lead to more and I don't think you're ready for that yet" Azriel said, thinking she'd had enough happen in the past week or so, she didn't need a territorial fae male on her hands, because it may not be accepting the bond, but he knew, for him at least, it'd be the same difference.  
"Sex with my mate, oh that'd be terrible, I'd just have to suffer through it" she said.  
"Mother help me, there is definitely a streak of Morrigan in you, only you're brutally honest, she'd never come out and say anything like that, she says it with her clothes, attitude and how she acts" Azriel said.  
"I'm a kitchen slave, I lack social graces" Sanarie said, but the levity in her voice couldn't cut the sting of truth in her words.  
Azriel was silent for a few moments, until he pulled her closer and began kissing her.  
He pulled back after a luxuriant kiss, "I will do whatever you ask me to. And you're not a kitchen slave anymore, you're my mate, you're treasured, you're powerful, intelligent, beautiful" he said.  
Sanarie's heart filled to bursting, she'd never experienced this feeling before Azriel, but every day he healed her heart a little more. She wound her fingers into Azriel's hair and pulled him closer for a deeper kiss, "I want to be warm, and I want to be with you, as close as two mates can be before they're mated" she said.  
"If you need me to stop or you want me to stop at any time, you say so and I will" he said, wondering how she'd wound him around every one of her fingers in such a short time; to hell with what he thought she needed, he'd give her whatever she wanted.  
Sanarie nodded and ran her fingers over his ear, his eyes darkened and he lowered them to hers, before they both closed their eyes and took their time with each others lips.  
Azriel stopped kissing Sanarie, hovering above her lips as she caught her breath, "I give you my blessing; to touch my wings"  
Sanarie took his lips again and showed him what it meant to her, to have his trust.  
"Touch me, please Azriel" she said, needing more than the passionate kissing.  
Azriel said nothing, but Sanarie felt his fingers trailing down her body, lighter as he neared between her legs. He pressed his thumb gently into her button, massaging, she cried out shocked at how good it felt, no one had ever touched her like this. Azriel covered her mouth with his, overwhelming her, as he slid his fingers a little inside her, Sanarie moaned onto his lips, the sound echoed by his deep grumble of appreciation.  
Azriel moved his lips down her chin, along her jaw and down her neck, until he found a spot which made her turn away from him, sighing and automatically giving him easier access to that tender, sensitive spot.  
She felt a hardness between them, knowing it was him, she reached down and grasped him in her hand, the shock of his size bought her out of her reveries for a few moments and she bent her neck to look at him.  
"That will not fit" she said, feeling somewhere between awe and terror.  
"I won't put myself inside you, until you're begging, you are not there yet" Azriel said, gently removing her hand from him, trying to keep his control.  
"You'll be really slow and gentle though?" she said.  
"Always, unless you beg for something else" Azriel said.  
Sanarie nodded and Azriel must have seen the apprehension in her eyes, because he conjured some oils and lathered his fingers, "This helps I promise, I have never hurt a female, and I wouldn't start by hurting my mate" he said.  
She relaxed at this, it was him she was with, observant, thoughtful, gentle Azriel, she was safe, she let go of old fear and let Azriel tend her body.  
He moved unpredictably between using his thumb lightly and firmly, swirling around her outside and applying pressure across her whole button. He kissed her when she needed his lips on hers and, shocked her nerves at the spot he'd unearthed on her collarbone. He slowly swirled his long fingers deeper inside her, driving her closer to the madness of orgasm.  
"I need you Azriel, please, I beg you" Sanarie managed, knowing he needed those words to be sure of what she was asking of him.  
Azriel lathered himself, and positioned himself above her, he pressed his tip onto her opening, and easily slipped inside, Sanarie's fear melted away, she wanted more of this, more of him, until he filled her. The comfort of him there, was what she needed, being joined with him was not just physical, it was better than that, it was security and comforting.  
Azriel gently nudged deeper, making her crazy, but she was missing something, she couldn't figure out what, and then she knew, because Azriel did something with his magic, as he kissed her, as he descended deeper inside her, she felt cool nudges and swirls around her most sensitive part, she cried out in shocked pleasure. Azriel chuckled his delight at her reaction to his skill, as she let go into their passion together, her body tensed and began to rock naturally against his.  
"Stop that, be still, I don't want to hurt you" he said.  
Sanarie nodded and tried to focus on him in the dim light, cast from the edges of the furs around them and beneath them, Azriel saw her trying to come out of the heady fog of near coming, and pushed into her a little harder and faster, it was what her body had been asking for rocking against his, she fell back with the ecstasy of it.  
Sanarie had to focus on breathing, Azriel knew exactly what she wanted, and still surprised her in the right ways, keeping her body guessing.  
His magic teased and pleasured her button, and his hardness filled her and pressed deep and hard, then slow and gentle. It happened before she could ask him to stop, it felt intense to the point when it released her she thought it would hurt, but it didn't, not the way she'd expected. It was pleasure and pain all at once, waves of it hitting her before the last one had ended, she was clutching onto Azriel crying, before she realized he was in the throws of coming with her. She focused just enough to reach out and circle her finger lightly around the flesh surrounding a claw on the apex of his left wing, she felt him release inside her as he spoke her name like a prayer, the warmth of it inside her soothing in a way she hadn't expected. His body lay on hers, heavy, as they caught their breath together.  
"I love you Sanarie" Azriel said.  
Her heart swelled, and she snuggled into his neck, feeling nothing like she ever had before, and replied "I love you too"  
Relaxed and at ease, he pulled back to kiss her, lightly, but with deep tenderness behind it. Sanarie sighed contentedly as he kissed her, and when he was done she had to ask, "When you were inside me, did you play with me using your shadows?"  
Azriel chuckled "Yes, not a bad trick is it?"  
"Not bad at all" she said.  
He sighed.  
"What is it?" she said.  
"I've ruined Elaine's garden for no reason" he replied.  
"I'm sorry" she said.  
"It's okay, next time I want you in my bed, if there is a next time" he said.  
"Once would never be enough, there will always be a next time" she said.  
He chuckled his response and kissed her neck and shoulder, "Shall we doze together?" he said.  
She hummed her agreement and held him on top of her, she wasn't ready to be apart from him.  
Lying there, in Azriel's arms him rubbing his thumb over her skin in his comforting way, Sanarie let her mind wander. She began thinking about her powers, of the magnitude of what she needed to learn, and of the songs of her boys and her sister. She wondered if she could sing something, not sad or healing, but something to grow Elaine's seedlings into flowers. She was a "Soulsinger", did that mean only the songs of Fae and Creatures would find her, or did it mean anything living had a soul and a song and she could hear them all if she just tried? Her mind buzzed a lovely relaxing feeling, then soft, sweet sound filled her head, and she could smell phantom flowers in full bloom, words in the old language that Korazsa had taught her flowed into her voice, and she sang.  
She sang for a long while, for so long that Azriel had fallen asleep and rolled onto his back at the sound, sleeping peacefully beside her, when she'd finished she rolled into his side and let deep dosing sleep take her for a while.


	30. Chapter 30

"Azriel?" Sanarie cried his name in shock.  
Azriel started and threw back the covers as he summoned a blade and looked around, but there was no threat, there was however a sea of tall, bright flowers as high as the bed, higher in places. Confused he looked down to Sanarie, who had thrown her arm over her eyes in the bright afternoon light, it wasn't her naked body his eyes were drawn to, although it was beautiful, his eyes were drawn to her other hand on her distended belly, and the small heart beat, thudding inside it.  
He disappeared the sword and, and gathered his shadows around them, so they were thick and shielded Sanarie from the bright light.  
"How" he said, gently pulling her arm from her face and placing his other on her belly, over the sound of their baby's heartbeat.  
"You like that word when baffled" Sanarie said, amused at him lost for words.  
"You're, I'd say, 6 months pregnant, how?" he said.  
"I think it's my fault" Sanarie said, feeling guilty.  
Azriel was shocked, but kept his left hand on her stomach, and looked to her eyes brushing her cheek with his fingers and his shock gave way to a smile, which wiped away her guilt, he leaned down and kissed her, smiling and chuckling.  
Sanarie started laughing too, it was completely ridiculous, Morrigan would hit the roof. When word got out about the two Singers in Velaris who had conceived within 2 weeks of being together, every Fae couple yearning for a youngling of their own would beg for her to at least try to re-create the blessing growing inside her.  
"No Fae couple conceive after their first mating, accepted bond or not" Azriel said.  
"I know" Sanarie said, feeling amazed and grateful, rubbing her hands over her belly, where her fae ears heard her baby's heart beat. She teared up, she had a family, a mate, little males, a home, a family who chose to save her and make her their own, who'd put their lives in danger to save hers. Now she and her mate would have a baby.  
Azriel leaned down and nibbled on her lips, down to her neck and inhaled deeply, then growled a territorial sound, she smelled like him, it emanated from her as if it were her own scent "What do you think you did?" he said.  
"I felt bad about Elain's seedlings, I didn't want you in trouble and I was thinking about my powers, and needing to learn them, so I inadvertently asked for a song to grow; but it grew more than her flowers" Sanarie said.  
Azriel burst out laughing, and started kissing her all over her body; especially her pregnant belly.  
"Madja told me after assessing me, that if I was ever to get pregnant I'd have to stay in bed most of the day, from around 6 months, because of my back" Sanarie said.  
"Then you won't move from bed until our baby is born, I'll have you waited on, or I'll carry you" Azriel said.  
"I hope it's a girl" Sanarie said.  
Azriel looked at her, and knew the only thing he wanted now, was for her to be his wife and mated to him as soon as possible.  
"Why a girl?" he said.  
"So that our little males never wonder if I love them or our biological child more, if she's a she they won't constantly compare themselves to her, so I hope it's a girl' Sanarie said, worried now about how her little males would adjust with no time to get used to the idea of a baby sibling. 'Oooh" she said, startled by the hard kick inside her, a wave of nausea hit her and she thought she might be sick but it passed.  
Azriel watched her closely, she wasn't distressed or afraid, then she took his hand and placed it over her belly. Azriel softened from being on guard, leaning closer he put his head on her belly, and listened, he felt and heard the kicks at the same time, he thought he knew magic, but this was better than any other he'd ever known.  
"Whatever we have, they will all be loved equally and they will all know it" he said, feeling grateful for having this female as his mate.  
"Can we go home?" she said.  
"I think the house of wind would probably be best, it's away from everyone, and well warded" he said, though he'd have an escort this time, he wouldn't fly her there unless he had one.  
She nodded her disappointment, she wanted her little males and she knew they wanted her, she'd hoped no touching didn't mean not being near them.  
"Be my wife, accept our mating bond" Azriel blurted out.  
She didn't look at all shocked by the sudden request, just happy as she said "Yes, the answer will always be yes. We should go do that before Morrigan finds out about this, might lessen the trouble you'll be in".  
"Or make it worse" Azriel said.  
Sanarie laughed, loud and true "It might"  
"Can I put your dress back on" Azriel asked, wanting to get her settled in the house of wind as soon as possible.  
"Will it fit?' she looked at him with amusement, he summoned a clean large shirt of his which would undoubtedly fit and she laughed, before she continued 'can we go get married before we go to the house of wind" Sanarie asked.  
"I didn't mean to get married today, just soon. You want Morrigan there don't you, flowers, a pretty dress?" he said.  
"I never thought she'd know I existed, I never thought I'd have a mate, I thought that life as a slave was all I had. I never thought I'd be married because no one ever even kissed me, except on a dare, so I never dreamed of a wedding. Right now I can't be around Morrigan, I don't care about the pomp and circumstance of a wedding, I just want to accept our bond and be your wife; we have enough to deal with, especially now. Marry me, let me feed you and myself and take me to the house of wind so I can rest and you can go beat up Rhysand or Cassian or both, maybe they'll have to fight Morrigan for the honours" Sanarie said.  
Azriel chuckled at her, "Whatever you want, we will do" he said.  
"We need food and well, food" Sanarie said, firstly because she was starving, and secondly she wanted this done so she could curl up in Azriel's arms, being suddenly 6 months pregnant had taken a toll on her body.  
He scooped her up, summoning the bear bones of clothes to their bodies and winnowed into his bedroom. He put her in his bed making sure she was comfortable "You'll be okay while I get what we need"  
"Don't go crazy, I'm hungry and tired, I just want to get this done, I know it's fast, I don't care I want the life you built for us for as long as we can before this war gets any worse" she said, turning over in bed and pulling pillows with her.  
"I'll be quick" he said.  
Azriel snuck out and shut the door; he was face to face with Morrigan.  
She sniffed at him and turned her head quizzically, "Why do you smell so strongly of my sister"  
"She's in my room, leave her alone and go get dressed in something pretty, don't ask questions, just do it" Azriel said.  
"You fucked her didn't you, we agreed you wouldn't" Mor said, trying to keep a lid on her anger.  
Azriel snarled at her and said "What I do with my mate is between she and I"  
"Are you two mated already" Mor asked, voice rising in anger.  
"No, we aren't mated yet. I need foods from the market, and to speak to Cassian amongst other things" Azriel said.  
"What is going on, I'm not doing anything or going anywhere until you tell me what is going on" she said.  
"Send this to Rhysand and Feyre, they can bring Amren and the sisters" Azriel said.  
Morrigan winnowed, Azriel prepared himself for her return, sure enough within moments she was back, having read the note "You're not marrying and mating her today."  
"I am." he said, it wasn't negotiable, it's what his mate wanted, needed and she got whatever she desired, now and for the rest of her life.  
"Over my dead body" she retorted.  
"She's pregnant" he said.  
Morrigan laughed, she didn't believe him, he grabbed her arm, winnowed into his bedroom. Sanarie was already protected from Morrigan's song with his shadows, she was on her side fast asleep, with her arm and hand wrapped under their baby, highlighting the size of her progressed gestation.  
Morrigan stood still mouth wide, he knew it was hard to process, it wasn't possible, Sanarie wasn't possible, and yet here she was.  
Azriel was looking at her, distracted by the sight of her in his bed, holding their baby in her belly.  
Morrigan's shock had clearly worn off, because she winnowed them into Rhysand and Feyre's house, then cracked him in the jaw, he let her have that one blow. Then he held her hands as she yelled at him "How the hell is she that pregnant, what the fuck did you do to her? This is why you were supposed to wait, no one knew what would happen if you were together! What if there's something wrong with it, what if it kills her to have a baby with her broken body?"  
Morrigan struggled, trying to slap him again.  
Her words struck his heart, there was truth in those words, worry and fear that he too felt from hearing them, from feeling them as she unleashed her truths on him.  
"Calm down Mor, it'll be a while yet before we have to worry about a Singer pregnancy" Rhysand said.  
"You didn't hear the first part, she is already pregnant, is that right Azriel?" Feyre said.  
Rhysand's eyebrow quirked to one side "Really"  
Azriel nodded.  
Rhysand and Feyre looked to each other, it had been a while since they started trying and had no luck, in this fortuitous turn of events they saw hope. Perhaps Sanarie's power could make Feyre pregnant...  
A soundwave rang through the city, shaking the house, Azriel felt his mates fear, the sadness in her heart and tried to winnow, he was stuck in Rhysand and Feyre's house, he didn't have the clearance to winnow here. Rhysand winnowed to his brother, removing Morrigan, he pushed her toward his mate, then winnowed Azriel home, he didn't let go as his brother winnowed to his mate. When they came from between space, Sanarie's singing scream was deafening, the boys were in a corner holding their ears and screaming-crying, she was on the floor, Azriel's shadows came thick around her and the sound cut out. She was sobbing, Rhysand already had his nephews, and a stunned look Azriel had never seen before, as he beheld how pregnant Sanarie was "I've got them, it'll be okay, I'll fetch Elaine" he said, knowing that was the best comfort he could give. Morrigan was too angry to be motherly, and Elaine never lacked the calm or instinct to do so.  
"I hurt them, Azriel, I hurt them" Sanarie sobbed.  
"Get Madja, please" he said to Rhysand, worried for Sanarie, her distress in her condition couldn't be good for her or their baby.  
Azriel had her in his arms, he took her to bed, trying to calm her, "I'm sorry, I should have come back right away"  
"Where did you go?" she said.  
"It doesn't matter, I should have been here' he said, hearing her and their baby's heartbeats going too fast, 'please breathe my love, the baby's in distress, just breathe"  
Sanarie took deep breaths in and out, and broke down again, remembering her little males, running from her arms. They'd come in when she called for Azriel, he hadn't been there at all, they only wanted their mama, and they'd ended up running from her holding each other, huddled on the other side of the room and screaming, crying as she belted out their soul songs, which mingled and tangled together so they hurt both equally and in turn, her. Healing a soul it seemed, was pain, it had been insufferable for Morrigan, they were just little males and yet their souls were broken in places, from the loss of their mother and father who bought them into this world. Sanarie felt her heart breaking, as she remembered the same fear in their eyes, as in her sisters. Azriel was the only one she couldn't hurt, he was the only one safe with her.  
"I hurt them, Azriel" she said, trying to breathe through the pain in her chest.  
Rhysand and Madja appeared, he worked fast and it was just as well.  
Sanarie crawled out of Azriel's arms to the side of the bed and threw up, it was only water and bile, but she still felt sick to her stomach at what she'd done, however unintentional.  
"Poor darling" Madja said, and administered a few drops of a calming tonic, Azriel pulled Sanarie against his chest, tears had escaped his eyes, torn between his sons and his mate.  
Sanarie looked to Rhysand "Make me sleep again, I beg you, so Azriel can go to our little males, please" she said, knowing it was the right thing.  
Rhysand looked from Sanarie to Azriel, his brother nodded.  
He made her sleep, Madja helped Azriel arrange her so she would be comfortable, no easy feat for a pregnant female so far along.  
"How advanced is she" Azriel asked Madja.  
"7 to 8 months at least, she's small for a High Fae, so it's deceiving" Madja said.  
Azriel's face strained, more torn now, he leaned down and kissed her lips, "I'm going to comfort our little males, I won't leave them until they're okay, until they understand what you are, that you love them and that it's not your fault"  
He hung his head, to hide the tears streaming down his face, to leave her was anguish, to not be with his sons who needed him was just as bad.  
Rhysand touched his shoulder, "I'll be here, until you can, she won't feel pain or songs, she'll get the sleep her body needs" he said.  
"Thank you, thank you both" he said looking to Madja, Rhysand stepped back and conjured a seat, he sat and began to watch over and protect his cousin, until his brother could tend his mate once more.

Azriel rocked his boys until he and they were calm, he told them mama was sorry, that this was why she had to be apart from them for a while, they understood, they were sad, they missed her, she'd been what they needed. He told them their Aunties and Uncles would look after them, until it was safe to be with mama. He'd make sure he moved Sanarie when she was ready, so their sons could at least be in his manor where they felt at home. Sanarie needed some place above the city to train, though he realized it was unlikely she'd have a hold on her powers before their baby was born. After his boys were calm, smiling and playing again, he felt okay leaving them with Elaine, who doted on them and spoiled them, as is the prerogative of Aunties. Lucian would stand watch over them all, Azriel was grateful to them both and vowed to return the favour one day.

Azriel winnowed to Cassian's office, he was meeting with the captain of the core of warriors sent from Summer to help guard the city. The second he saw Azriel's face he barked "Out, now" the captain stood and left immediately, glad he was told to leave when he saw the dishevelled Shadowsinger.  
"I need air escort from my place to the House of Wind, I can't explain, you'll see when you get there" Azriel said.  
Cassian nodded "is everyone alive?" he seemed afraid of the answer.  
"Everyone is alive and then some" Azriel replied.  
Cassian looked puzzled, "I'll be there in 10"  
"I can always count on you, all of you" Azriel said, feeling grateful.  
"And now, so can Sanarie" Cassian replied, with such heartfelt sincerity he cleared his throat and looked away as he saw Azriel's reaction.  
Azriel felt emotion well in his throat, he chocked it down and nodded, before he disappeared.

When Azriel appeared in his bedroom again, Cassian was on guard with Rhysand, Azriel had a Priestess with him and a bag of foods.  
"And then some indeed, brother" Cassian said, thumping his back in a congratulatory manner.  
"Soulsinger" he said, staring at his soon to be future wife and mated.  
"Go get Morrigan would you, tell her to come happily, and watch her sister get married, or stay away angry and miss it" Azriel said to Rhysand as he put his shadows around Sanarie for protection.  
Rhysand nodded, he gently let go of Sanarie's mind and woke her, Azriel was already in the bed holding her.  
"They're fine, younglings bounce back quickly, in fact by the time I left they had more sunshine in their faces than I've ever seen, your singing did them good in the end" Azriel said, comforting her with every word.  
"Thank you, thank you my poor babies" she said, then thinking how hungry she was, and probably her baby too.  
Azriel knew her thoughts as if they were his own, he still had the bag of foods in hand, so he summoned a bed table onto the bed beside Sanarie and moved the contents of the bag onto the table.  
"Olives, I love those" she said, plucking one up and eating it, as if it was a rare delicacy.  
Morrigan and Rhysand winnowed into the room, as Sanarie prepared some bread, with grounds, vinegar and oil, then turned to Azriel, and offered it to him.  
"Like this? Are you sure?" he said, making sure she knew this counted.  
Sanarie looked at her belly and said "Well, we're as mated as it gets, may as well make it official"  
Azriel chuckled and ate the food off her fingers, then licked them clean with loud, sucking, playful pops, which made Sanarie giggle in return.  
The scowl Morrigan had worn into the room, vanished, and she couldn't deny they were perfect together, as if they'd always been this way.  
The scent of Azriel and Sanarie mingled deeper, and Rhysand and Cassian tensed waiting for anger to flare, waited for Azriel to turn feral eyes on them, but he didn't.  
"How you feeling brother?" Cassian said, watching for any change in his brother.  
"Never better" he replied, kissing his mate gently and holding her belly.  
It was as if no one else existed let alone the males in the room.  
"What is this, I always thought he'd be worse than you were; after you and Feyre" Cassian said to Rhysand.  
"Maybe it's because she's pregnant, I've never seen a newly mated pair who were already expecting, let alone 7-8 months into it" Rhysand said.  
"Pacified by pregnancy" Sanarie said, to herself, making everyone laugh a little.  
"Would you like to be my wife now?" Azriel asked.  
"Yes" Sanarie said, with certainty, which helped quash more of her sisters doubts.  
"First, I want you to have this, we may have no time to be engaged but you deserve a beautiful ring" Azriel said, as he held out a small box.  
Sanarie took it and opened it, his ring for her had a large, natural, white, pearl, held on by a pair of Illyrian wings, with the talons at the apexes securing the stone; the wings sparkled black and rainbow colors with small tightly packed stones. Sanarie held out her hand, and Azriel took the ring out and slid it onto her finger.  
"It's us" she said.  
"I wish I'd thought more about that when I had it made" Azriel said, sad that he knew all those years ago when he'd commissioned it, his soul knew about their destiny, but he hadn't seen it or her until she'd already suffered so much.  
"It's lovely, but very big, do I have to wear it all the time?" she said, thinking about the practicality of such a large ring.  
"No, you don't" he said, then summoned two silver bands.  
"Thank god" she said, thinking about having 3 babies under 4 and that she'd rather not scratch any if them accidentally.  
Azriel kissed her head, "Easy to please aren't you?"  
"For now, but if I become accustomed to this treatment you might be in trouble" Sanarie said.  
"I've got the money and love to spoil you, so I'll look forward to you demanding your worth" he said.  
They kissed slowly and sweetly.  
"On behalf of Elaine who could not be here... 'Awwwwww'" Cassian said with a wink, when Azriel looked at him and shook his head.  
"Shut up you goof" Rhysand said.  
"You have my blessing" Morrigan said, leaving the room a little less tense, but silent for a few moments. She knew neither of them needed permission, but it would mean a lot to each, to have her blessing, so she gave it freely. She'd wanted her sister to have a great romance, a love story, but she realized she wanted a picture for her sister and that wasn't her place, especially not when she was happy with what she had.  
Sanarie looked at Morrigan, smiled then to Azriel, and said "Shall we? I'm exhausted and still hungry, I want Porridge and Bacon, then sleep, with you holding me. It has been a day" she sounded exasperated, but as content as she could be.  
Azriel ushered the priestess forward, before she could begin he said "As quickly as you can, we need to get her to the House of Wind and to bed"  
The priestess said "Of course, we can skip all the fluff, and just do the binding of the blood"  
Azriel and Sanarie did as she asked, piercing the skin of their palms, putting their bloodied hands together and reciting the words, as the priestess used her sacred mother-blessed cloth around their hands.  
"I give my life to you; of my own freewill, and take yours with a grateful heart. I give my love to you; of my own freewill, and take yours with a grateful heart. I give my body to you; of my own freewill, and take yours with a grateful heart. I am yours, you are mine, by my blood I bind myself to you"  
The priestess removed the cloth and said "May the mother bless you both"  
Azriel pulled her closer and kissed her gently, he felt her melt into his arms and then when he let her go she dropped her head to his shoulder, a sign she needed him to keep taking care of things.  
He summoned a cloak to surround her, and pulled her into his chest, then stood, and turned to Cassian "The escort?"  
"In your foyer" Cassian said.  
"Thank you, we'll see you when we can, I'll train her as soon as it's safe, for her and the baby" he said.  
"Take care of my family" Morrigan said, looking from her sister to her belly.  
"Always" Azriel said, before he and Sanarie disappeared, into their first night together as mates, as blood bound husband and wife.


End file.
